Revive Me

by Ferrell, Charity

  “I’ll meet you at your house,” Dawson called through his window, waiting for me to get into my car and pull out so he could follow me. I immediately turned my AC on high and faced all the fans toward my face before pulling away.

  I parked in my driveway at the same time Dawson pulled up in front of the house. He jumped from his truck and opened up my car door.

  “I’m driving,” he ordered.

  “Alrighty,” I said, not in the mood to argue. I slid into the passenger seat and turned the fans in the opposite direction. “Since when did you get so bossy?” I grumbled as he put the car in reverse and backed out.

  “Since you started making dumbass decisions.” He really needed to let this go. He was beating a dead horse. “You’re hanging out with that Reese guy? Really Tessa? You know he’s a loser, right?”

  “You don’t even know him.” Reese didn’t make me do anything I didn’t want to do. I drove myself to that party. I drank the alcohol he gave me. I took the shots. He might’ve encouraged it, but I am a big girl.

  “True, but I know of him. I’ve seen him around at a few parties and heard plenty of rumors. He’s bad news. Plus, he’s not even your type.” He was right and knew me too well. My walls had never been covered with rock star guys I wanted to be my future husbands.

  I fidgeted in my seat. “I thought I’d try a new type.” A growl came from the other side of the car, and he whipped around a turn quickly. “I mean, what I thought was my type didn’t want me, so it might be time to try something new.” My voice was playful, but he didn’t miss my insult and the point I was trying to make.

  We pulled into Derrick’s school. “Don’t start this shit,” he spat out angrily. The back door opened, and Derrick jumped into the backseat before either one of us had a chance to say anything else.

  “Ice cream, here we come!” he yelled, throwing his fist up in the air and tossing his book bag to the other side of the seat. “I’ve been craving this all day.”

  Dawson and I laughed. “You’ve been craving this all day?” I asked, looking back at him.

  “Yep, and it’s good to have a guys’ day, too.” He leaned forward and patted Dawson’s shoulder.

  “What am I?” I asked. “Chopped liver?”

  Derrick laughed. “No, you’re allowed to come too, Sis.”

  “Glad I’m so wanted.” I looked over at Dawson. “Did you get this excited about ice cream and guys’ day when you were fourteen?”

  He smiled mischievously. “You don’t want to know what I was excited about at that age. But it sure as hell wasn’t ice cream and hanging out with guys.” I smacked his arm as we pulled into the small diner. The three of us hopped out of the car, went inside, and slid into an open booth. I sat beside Derrick and Dawson squeezed in across from us.

  “Do you know what you want?” I asked Derrick.

  “Hot fudge sundae and a chili dog, please,” he answered. I nodded and grabbed my wallet from my purse.

  Dawson snatched it from my hand and tossed it back into my bag. “I got it.”

  I shook my head. “Nu uh, this is on me.” I knew Dawson’s and his mom were living on one income.

  He got up from his seat. “I got it.”

  “No, you bought Derrick’s food last night,” I replied, getting up. He grabbed my shoulders and pushed me back down into the booth.

  “I said I got it.” He whipped around on his heels and walked up to order.

  I sighed, shrinking back against my seat, and Derrick grabbed his phone to play a game with flying pigs.

  “All right guys, here you go,” he said, returning with a full tray of food in his hands. “A hot dog and a sundae for the man.” He set the food in front of Derrick, and he let out a ‘woot’ before thanking him. “And a chicken sandwich, a cherry coke, and banana split for you.” He set the same food I ordered every time in front of me.

  “Thanks,” I said, grabbing a straw and poking it through my lid of my cup.

  “How was school today, buddy?” Dawson asked Derrick, snagging a few french-fries and tossing them into his mouth.

  Derrick shrugged and swallowed his food. “It’s okay. People are always asking me about Tanner. It gets annoying.” I knew he was getting the same pity stares as me. His was probably worse, since he went to school with everyone in our town. “I miss him, a lot.”

  “We all miss him,” Dawson said. “And I know he misses you, too.”

  “What about Mom and Dad?” he asked, looking up at us. “Do they miss him? Mom cries all the time and she screams at me every time I bring him up.”

  I nudged his side with my elbow playfully. “She’s just having a hard time with missing him. They’ll get better, just give them time.”

  His shoulders drooped. “But what about me? Don’t they miss me? Miss us? Dad doesn’t play football with me anymore, and Mom complains if I ask to have friends over.” I knew I wasn’t that great in helping out with the boy department like my dad and Tanner had been, but I was trying. I’d attempted to help him with his sports, but I couldn’t throw a football more than six inches before it fell to the ground.

  “How about every Saturday, we’ll go toss some balls or do something fun?” Dawson asked him.

  Derrick perked up and smiled. “That would be awesome!”

  “You still have my number in your phone?”

  “Sure do.” He grabbed his phone and showed Dawson his name.

  “Good, give me a call anytime.”

  Dawson and Derrick talked about sports as we finished our meal and then headed home. “Call me if you need anything,” he said when Derrick got out of the car and ran inside.

  “I will.” I started to get out of the car, but he grabbed my shoulder and turned me around. His eyes searched mine, and he leaned in closer. “Promise me, Tessa.”

  “I promise. Thank you for offering to take Derrick out, you don’t have to if you’re too busy. I’ll take him to watch a movie or something, and he’ll be fine.”

  “I’m not bailing on him. Your family is my family, Tess. I spent almost every single day with you guys and you think I’m just going to forget the rest of you because Tanner’s no longer here? Not happening. Derrick has always been like a little brother to me and with Tanner gone, he needs someone now more than ever. So if you don’t want to be around me, so be it, but don’t hold him back. That’s selfish.”

  He was right. “I won’t,” I said, gripping the door handle with my hand. He seemed satisfied with my answer and got out of the car.

  “Have a good night.” He circled around the car and smacked the hood before getting back into his truck and pulling away. I took a deep breath and stayed in my seat for a few minutes to get my head together before going inside.

  I kicked a t-shirt lying on my bedroom floor and collapsed into my bed. I’d tried calling Daisy fives time, but it kept going straight to voicemail. She’d turned her phone off to avoid having to talk to me. Her promise was nothing but a lie. She’d never planned on coming over. I grabbed my phone from my nightstand and played with it in my hands before hitting the button to my call history. I waited a moment, going back and forth on whether or not this was a good idea. It probably wasn’t, but I took a deep breath and hit the name quickly.

  “You called,” the surprised voice greeted from the other end. Loud music blared in the background.

  “Is this a bad time?” I asked nervously. Maybe this was a sign that I shouldn’t be calling him.

  “No, hold on a sec,” he called over the music. “Let me just go somewhere quiet.” I heard shuffling as the sounds begin to fade until everything turned quiet. “Sorry ‘bout that, my boy’s band is playing at this gig tonight. You should come out.” I glanced over at my alarm clock.

  “It’s a little late.” I was still recovering from last night. There was no way I could put my body through that hell again so soon.

  “Curfew again?” he joked.

  “Yeah.”

  “But no other boys this time?”

>   I wasn’t sure why, but I smiled widely at his question. “No other boys.”

  He whistled loudly. “Good, I wouldn’t want to have to fight anyone off my girl.” That smile grew wider. “I wish I could see that pretty face right now. What are you doing?”

  I settled back into my bed and moved around until I was situated comfortably under my blankets. “Laying in bed.”

  “And what are you wearing in bed?”

  Tingles spread through my body, and I fidgeted with the sleeves of my sweatshirt. “We are so not going there.”

  He laughed, and it sounded like he’d taken a hit from a cigarette. “Come on, babe, let’s have some fun. I know you’re bored over there.”

  I yawned. “Not happening.” I hadn’t even had sex yet, how in the world could I manage to do something over the phone I’d never done in real life?

  He laughed again. “Fine, have it your way. I’ll let it slide this time, but tomorrow night you’re letting me take you out.”

  “Like out on a date?” There was no way I was going out with him.

  “Yes, like out on a date.”

  “I’ll think about it.” I needed some extra time to create a good excuse. I knew Reese wouldn’t go for the whole I’ve got to wash my hair sixteen times.

  “If you stand me up, I’ll be calling you, and you’ll have to describe piece by piece what you’re wearing. Are you wearing pajamas? Or panties and a tank top? Or are you naked?” Warm sensations flooded my body. “Just answer me, baby.”

  “Goodnight, Reese,” I drew out slowly, fighting a smile.

  “Goodnight, beautiful. Have sweet and naughty dreams about me.” I could hear him laughing when I hit the end button and shook my head. I pulled out a drawer, snagged one of my sleeping pills, and swallowed it. I took the pill every night, but it would still take hours to kick in and take me away from my nightmares.

  Tessa

  “Damn babe, you clean up nice.” I walked out my front door to find Reese leaning against an old, burnt-orange, rusted four-door car. He tossed a cigarette on the ground before making his way up to me. A pair of cargo shorts hung low on his hips, and his hair was swept back in another ball cap.

  “Thanks,” I muttered, I’d managed to run a straightener through my hair and swiped some mascara on my eyelashes.

  He bit his lower lip, clasping his lip ring between his teeth. “You ready for a good-ass night?” he asked, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me into his chest. His lips smacked into the top of my head before grabbing the handle of the passenger door as it squeaked open. I got in and immediately the stench of stale cigarettes and old socks hit me. I held my breath and quickly rolled down the window.

  “I was thinking we could get something to eat first?” he asked, getting into the car and looking over at me.

  “Sounds good.” I was curious what he had planned for us. I didn’t see Reese as the romantic date night guy, but hey, I never thought I’d be out getting wasted alone, either.

  “Pizza cool with you? I know this killer pizza joint.” I nodded, and the car’s engine slowly stirred to life after a few turns. “Damn, you’re easy to please,” he laughed, grabbing a pack of cigarettes from the cup holder. He brought the entire package to his mouth and slid one out with his teeth. “You mind if I smoke?”

  I’d always hated the smell of smoke. I’d been lucky enough that neither of my parents smoked, and I’d never picked up on the habit. Tony Higgins dared me to try one during a game of truth-or-dare freshman year. I’d stuck the bitter stick in my mouth, inhaled gently, and nearly choked while everyone cracked up in laughter around me. It wasn’t a good experience, and I’d always liked Tony for that.

  “Go ahead,” I grumbled, rolling down the window further and wishing I’d backed out. Why was he so persistent for me to go out with him? I’d noticed the girls he hung out with at school. They were nothing like me. “But you know that stuff will kill you, right?”

  “We all have our vices, sweetheart,” he said, a flicking his lighter open. The end of the cigarette burned orange. “We all have our vices.” His words hit close to home. Yes, we did. “I’ve got some kick ass jams in here,” he said, hitting the volume button on the radio as rock music came through the speakers. “This is my friend’s band.” I nodded, wincing at the loud screaming, and I knew I’d have a headache by the time we got to dinner. Reese either didn’t seem to notice or care, because he kept his eyes on the road and bobbed his head to the beat.

  He pulled into the parking lot of a building with a giant pizza sign at the entrance. I hopped out, adjusted the bottom of my shorts, and shut the door. “I’ve never been here before,” I commented. He grabbed my hand and led me through the entrance.

  “They have the most bomb pizza in town,” he said, opening the door for me, and we walked into the busy area. Tables were spread throughout the middle of the room and large booths lined the windows. Red and white-checkered tablecloths covered each table with containers of Parmesan cheese and spices stacked in the corners. I followed him down the middle aisle, passing full tables, as we tried to find an empty one. I spotted a few waitresses, all of them wearing tall, white chef hats with checkered aprons as they scurried around with drinks and pizzas in their hands.

  “Found one,” Reese called, pulling my hand, and I stumbled forward as he charged across the room and fell down into the hard booth. He dropped my hand, and I sat across from him. “What kind of pizza do you like?”

  I shrugged. “Whatever is fine,” I answered, scanning the menu and the variety of choices. The only topping I preferred on my pizza was chicken, but I didn’t have an appetite, so I wouldn’t be eating much anyways.

  “Babe,” he said slowly, and I looked up from the menu to him. “Tell me what you want. Don’t be shy. This is our date, so we can get to know each other, and I think knowing what kind of topping you like on your pizza is very important.”

  “Can we do chicken?”

  He clapped his hands together, grabbed my menu, and placed it at the edge of the table on top of his. “Chicken it is.” He waved his hand over to the waitress standing to the side and she sauntered our way.

  “Hey Reese,” she greeted, her voice sweet, and her bright pink lips smiling at him, as she pulled out a pad from her apron.

  “What’s going on, Molly,” he replied, looking at her briefly before putting his attention back on me. “What do you want to drink, babe?”

  “I’ll have a water, no lemon,” I answered, and she scribbled it down without looking at me.

  “I’ll have what my girl is having,” Reese said.

  “Right,” she drew, tapping her pen against the edge of the pad. “Are you ready to order for you and your girl?”

  Reese grabbed our menus and handed them to Molly. “Large chicken, extra cheese, and a small order of breadsticks.”

  “I’ll get that in for you,” she said, jotting our order down and walking away.

  “I’m glad you came out with me,” he said. “I was sure you were going to bail on my ass.” Molly returned and set our drinks down without saying a word and left.

  I played with the straw in my water. “I was sure I was going to bail.”

  He laughed, playing with his piercing, and grinned. I eyed him, wondering what it would feel like to kiss him. I’d never been with anyone sporting mouth metal.

  “You didn’t, and that’s what’s important. I think you’re starting to warm up to me. Sooner or later, you’ll be completely comfortable, telling me everything.”

  “Oh really?” I asked, forcing a small smile across my lips. Nobody would ever know my secret.

  I picked at my pizza, while Reese told me about going to his buddy’s show the other night. “You have to come with me next time. They’re so kickass, there’s no way they won’t become big time in the future. I’ll definitely be a roadie for them, too,” he laughed. I didn’t say much, just listened to him ramble.

  Molly brought the bill, setting it on the table, and R
eese picked it up.

  “Here, let me get mine,” I said, unzipping my purse.

  He nodded. “Okay, looks like it’s twenty-five bucks, if you’ll just give me twenty that’ll be cool. I’ll leave the tip.”

  My head jerked up in disbelief. I always offered to go Dutch on the few dates I’d been on, but the guys always declined, insisting dinner or the movie was on them. But Reese was sitting across from me, holding out his hand, and definitely not saying dinner was on him. I grabbed a few bills from my wallet and handed them over.

  “Thanks, babe.” He pulled money from his pocket and shoved them on top of the bill.

  “You’re going to have fun tonight,” Reese said, getting back into his car. “Even if I have to force it out of you.”

  I pulled the seatbelt across my body, and the music shot to full blast again. I didn’t ask him where we were going. I just kept my eyes on the road and hoped we’d get there soon before I had to start plugging my ears. The band wasn’t terrible, but they weren’t going to be hitting the big time in my opinion. We turned down a dirt road that led into an open field lined with cars and trucks. I squinted and made out bright flames in the distance as a few people walked across the lot and headed towards it. Great, so much for him not taking me to another party.

  I’d always enjoyed bonfires. They were pretty popular in our town. We didn’t have fancy hangouts, bars, or clubs. I didn’t mind that, but I wasn’t expecting him to do something else. I looked down at the grimy floorboard covered in bags of Cheetos in disappointment.

  He got out of the car and pulled a lever underneath his seat. I watched him open up the trunk from the side mirror. He pulled out a case of beer and set it down onto the ground.

  “Yo babe, a little help here!” he called out. I secured my purse around my body and got out. He could’ve at least pre-warned me so I wasn’t wearing my flip-flops while walking through a field. He handed me a few bottles of alcohol and grabbed the case of beer. I held a green bottle out, reading the label, and my stomach twisted.