Fallen (Fallen Series Book 1)

by Micalea Smeltzer

  “No, not really.”

  I could tell he didn’t want me to ask further questions about his family so I dropped the subject.

  “Is there a blanket in here? I’m freezing.” I asked rubbing my arms for warmth.

  “I don’t think so. Here . . .” he said shrugging out of his black leather jacket. He handed it to me and I put it on. The jacket was cool but I guessed that had to do with Jonathon being outside. The jacket smelled like new car and something else I couldn’t quite figure out.

  “Do you want a pillow?” he asked me.

  “Yeah, that would be great. Where are the doctors at? Shouldn’t they be checking on my mom?”

  “They should be; they may have checked while you were sleeping. I’ll go hunt down a pillow and a doctor and be right back.” He chuckled at something I didn’t understand.

  He left the room silently closing the door behind him. I looked at my mom. So many things ran through my mind but one stuck out and I hit to ring my dad’s cell phone.

  “Hello.” He answered on the last ring.

  I could see him in my mind rubbing his eyes and yawning.

  “I’m sorry dad I know it’s early there or maybe it’s late. Anyway, but I haven’t had time to call you.” I let out a deep breath. “Something bad has happened dad.”

  “Are you okay?” he asked clearly worried about me for the first time in almost a year.

  “I’m fine, but mom isn’t.”

  “What happened?” he demanded.

  It made me mad that he sounded so worried about her. If he cared so much why would he have left her?

  “She tried to commit suicide.” I choked out in between sobs.

  “Is she going to be okay? I’m getting a plane ticket!” He declared.

  I could see him puttering around his room looking for his wallet.

  “No dad!” I nearly screamed into the phone.

  “Why not?” He demanded.

  “Because you’ll make it worse. Why do you think she tried to commit suicide?”

  “I don’t know.” He whispered.

  “Because of you, dad! You broke her heart. Did you know she was taking depression medication again? Huh?”

  “No. I thought she was finally okay with it.” He said exasperated.

  “Well . . . That’s how she tried to kill herself. Overdose.”

  “I can’t believe this.” He said sounding near tears.

  “I can. When we arrived yesterday she wasn’t herself. Distant, she wouldn’t eat or drink and she was the same this morning. I got home from school and she was still like that. Our neighbor, Jonathon brought us dinner and . . .” my voice cracked. “When I went to get her to eat dinner she wouldn’t move or speak. I was so scared. If it weren’t for Jonathon she would have died. He drove us to the hospital and still nothing. Dad, she hasn’t woken up, talked, or moved since we’ve been at the hospital. I’m scared and the only person I have is Jonathon. Not you.”

  “You do have me sweetie and your brothers.”

  “Ha! I haven’t even told them yet! I don’t need them missing classes! If she gets worse I’ll call and tell them to come but right now I don’t need to worry them! And I don’t have you! You sent mom and me as far away from you as you could get us! You didn’t want us ruining your perfect little world! So don’t tell me you care! I just thought you should know what you’ve done!” With that I hung up.

  “Bravo,” said Jonathon grinning and clapping.

  “How much did you hear?” I asked embarrassed.

  “Just the last part about how you were sent as far away as possible and then what was after that.”

  “Did you laugh?”

  “No. You needed to say what you did. You’ve been through a lot haven’t you?”

  “Yeah it’s been rough.” I said pulling Jonathon’s jacket tighter around my body. Jonathon knew I didn’t want to talk about it anymore so he didn’t say anything else. It’s like we could communicate silently to one another.

  The doctor chose that moment to come in and check on my mom. She said she was doing fine and not to worry. I listened to her reassurances but it didn’t matter. My mom had done what she did to die. To die and leave me. To leave me alone. I wasn’t sure that I could ever forgive her selfish act.

  After she left Jonathon turned the couch into a small bed.

  “Thank you,” I said as he placed a pillow on the bed. “For everything.” I added.

  “You’re welcome.” He said.

  Jonathon had brought back a warm blanket along with the pillow. But I wouldn’t take off his jacket. It felt comforting. I climbed onto the bed stretching my legs from hours of sitting in the chair. Jonathon sat down in the chair I had been occupying.

  “No.” I said.

  “What?” He asked confused.

  I patted the space next to me. “You need sleep too.” I said scared I was being to forward. But the truth is I didn’t want to have to watch my mom’s slow breathing and not have a shoulder to cry on. Or just someone to lean against. I’ve never been so worried and scared before.

  Jonathon seemed to see I was being sincere and not clingy. He could read me so well.

  “Okay.” He said getting up. He walked around the hospital bed and climbed into our makeshift bed. This was not how I pictured the scene the first time a boy and I were in the same bed.

  I managed to finally fall asleep even though I was so worried and then nervous about being so close to Jonathon.

  Sometime in the night I awoke.

  “Mom, mom, mom.” I repeated in a whisper.

  “Shhh,” said Jonathon gently stroking my hair with his cool fingertips. His leg was pressed against mine. Before I could say anything else I was asleep.

  When I woke up for real this time, Jonathon was watching me.

  “Did you get any sleep?” I asked.

  “A little,” he said smiling.

  “I must look awful.” I said trying to hide my embarrassment.

  “No, you look cute. But there are showers here. You could use one if you’d like.” He said putting a stray piece of hair behind my ear. This moment felt so intimate cuddled in Jonathon’s arms. It felt normal to be in his arms. Like we were meant to be together, made for each other.

  But I barely knew Jonathon. How could it be so natural to be together? I’ve never been one to believe in true love. Can you really love someone when you barely know them?

  The answer is yes. I am falling in love with Jonathon maybe I already am in love with him. This is all just so new and different.

  “Jonathon,” I said. “What happened to your parents?”

  He became very still and his eyes narrowed. I worried I had asked something to personal. From the bits and pieces I had been able to piece together, mostly over heard in school, and the way Jonathon acted as if his uncle were his dad, I knew something had happened to his parents. I just didn’t know what.

  “They were murdered.” He whispered through gritted teeth.

  “I’m so sorry Jonathon.” I said instinctively grabbing his hand.

  “Why does everybody say sorry for things that aren’t their fault?”

  “I guess it’s just a way to sympathize.” I said studying his fingers. They were cold but I didn’t mind.

  “Well then, I appreciate your sympathy but I don’t need it. I got over their deaths a long time ago. The pain never goes away but it has gotten easier.” He looked down at me through thick luscious eye lashes that I wanted to reach up and touch. He really looked like an angel. Maybe that’s what he was. My own personal guardian angel.

  There wasn’t anything left for me to say so I kept quiet.

  How could he be so timeless about everything? They way he spoke was like someone of another era. Someone of several centuries ago. Even his movements were calculated to fit another society. My thoughts trailed away to a young Jonathon playing with his parents. Then flashed to Jonathon being told his parents had been murdered. Jonathon being sent to live with his uncle.
Then I was snapped back into reality by the sound of my name.

  “Kylie.” Jonathon repeated for probably the fifth time.

  “Oh . . . sorry. I kind of spaced out.” I said looking down to avoid his intense gaze.

  “What were you thinking about?” He asked scrutinizing my face as if it held the key to my thoughts.

  “Nothing.” I mumbled not wanting him to know I was thinking about him.

  “No, you were thinking about something, your face was so serious.”

  I sighed. He wasn’t going to let it go. “I was thinking about you.”

  “What about me?” He pressed further. Worry in his eyes and brow as if I might be thinking something bad.

  “About how hard it must have been for you. Losing not one but both parents in such a malicious way. I don’t want to have to go through that.” I looked at my mom’s still figure. My answer seemed to have silenced Jonathon.

  How could my mom do this to me? After all I’ve been through. How could she try and take herself away from me? I don’t deserve that. I know the divorce was hard on her but it was hard on me too. I thought we at least had each other. I guess I was wrong.

  I continued to watch my mom as more of these thoughts ran erratically through my mind.

  Her finger twitched and I jumped forward.

  “Jonathon did you see that?” I asked looking over my shoulder at him as I grabbed my mom’s hand.

  “Yes, I did.”

  Her lips began moving.

  “She needs water,” said Jonathon handing me a cup.

  I took it and stuck it to my mother’s lips. I didn’t have time to wonder where he got it from or how fast he had gotten it. I tipped the cup slightly. As soon as the water touched her lips she guzzled it. I set the empty cup back down on the table.

  “Mom never do that to me again. You have no idea what I’ve been through.” She stirred.

  “You mean I’m not dead.” She croaked out.

  “Of course not. Unless I’m dead. And never try something like that ever again. I’ve been so worried you.”

  “Ugh.” She said holding her head.

  “What were you thinking?” I asked.

  “You’d be better off without me.” She said looking me in the eyes. But her eyes were glazed over and an unnatural feral hunger burned in her eyes.

  “No, I wouldn’t be. Do you think I really want to live with Kelly? No. Not even if hell freezes over. Twice.” I added.

  “You’re old enough to stay here by yourself.” Was her only reply. I let out a disgusted breath of air.

  “Mom,” I began rubbing her hand as I still grasped it, “I’ve already lost my dad. I don’t want to lose my mommy too.” I finished my voice cracking on the last word.

  Jonathon moved to leave the room.

  “Where are you going?” I demanded.

  He chuckled.

  “I’ll be right back. I’m just going to get my uncle. Your mom might be ready to be released.”

  “Oh,” was all I could say.

  He left and I could hear him laughing out in the hallway.

  I turned my attention back to my mom. How could I forget about her so easily?

  “He’s extremely good looking,” She stated.

  “I know but he’s much more than that.”

  “Where’d you meet him? School?”

  “No. He’s our neighbor. If it weren’t for him you would be dead. He has been really great.”

  “You like him.” She noted, smiling at me, but it looked more like a grimace of pain.

  “Yeah, I guess I do.”

  She didn’t say anything further on the subject.

  Jonathon came back with Patrick behind him.

  “Janice, you’re awake.” He said smiling. “It’s nice to finally meet you properly. I’m Patrick Pulmer. Jonathon’s uncle.” He said pointing to Jonathon who was now standing next to me. Jonathon grabbed my hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

  I wondered how many other girls Jonathon had been with. I’ve only had one boyfriend, and he cheated on me with my former best friend. I was heartbroken then but if Jonathon decided he wasn’t interested in me I don’t think I could handle it. However I don’t know why I am so attracted to Jonathon. Yes, he is beautiful. But there is something else. Something I can’t seem to describe. It’s like if he’s not with me there’s something pulling me towards him.

  My mom and Patrick continued to talk for the next five minutes. Then Patrick turned to me.

  “We’re going to go ahead and release your mom today.” Patrick said.

  “Really? Why so soon?” I asked utterly confused.

  “We think it will be better for her to be home and in a steady environment. I’ll set it up so that if you go anywhere, such as school, I will be at your house with your mom. She still can’t be left alone for risk of her attempting this again. But we think it would be healthier for her to be at home in a soothing and comforting environment. My volunteer hours are over here for the day. So, if you and Jonathon want to do something together you can. I’ll stay with your mom.”

  “Oh! You don’t need to do that.” I told Patrick.

  “It’s no problem. I’m going to be setting everything up for your mom to be safe at your house anyway. It’ll take hours. You two have been cooped up in here and school already knows you’re not coming do to the situation. Have some fun.”

  “I don’t know. . . Maybe.” He could see my defense was waning.

  “Honey, go have fun. I’ll be fine. Patrick will watch me. You have no need to worry. Go,” said my mom with a fierceness in her eyes that frightened me.

  “Okay.” I gave in.

  “Great,” said Jonathon speaking for the first time throughout the conversation.

  It was decided that Patrick would stay with my mom. I walked side by side with Jonathon. Patrick pushed my mom in a wheel chair. Instead of heading to Jonathon’s car we took a detour and went to Patrick’s. Just so I could be sure my mom would be fine without me.

  My mom stood shaking slightly. Patrick steadied her and helped her into his Mercedes. The Mercedes’ windows were so dark I couldn’t see into them clearly if I pressed my face into the glass.

  Before he closed the door to my mom I said, “Mom are you sure you’ll be fine?”

  “Yes I’ll be fine sweetie go have fun.”

  “Okay mom. But you have to understand I’m having some trouble trusting you.”

  “I know sweetheart. I won’t try anything like that again.”

  I closed her door and turned around. Patrick looked at my expression and put his hand on my shoulder.

  “She’ll be fine. I won’t take my eyes off her.”

  “I trust you. It’s her I don’t trust anymore.” I said nodding to the car.

  “She’ll earn you trust back,” he said walking around to the other side of the car.

  “I hope so.” I said. He nodded and ducked into the car. The engine purred to life.

  Jonathon grabbed my hand and we began walking. The Mercedes went passed us and the horn honked two short times. Jonathon and I both raised our free hand and waved. I dropped my hand back down to my side. But Jonathon held his in front of his face using his shadow to block the sun from his face.

  We got to the car and got in. The air conditioner blew my hair slightly. I turned towards Jonathon and he was watching me.

  “Kylie, I think it’s time you see Rome the way the Roman’s see it.”

  Chapter Five: Lunch Date

  “Where are we going to go?” I asked as we pulled out of the parking lot. It was exhilarating to finally get to do something fun. The past two days have been so stressful. I haven’t done anything fun in two years and here I am in a foreign country with the hottest guy alive. I looked over at waiting for him to answer. The sun that escaped through the dark tinted windows shimmered in his reddish-blond hair.

  “Well . . . the obvious of course. The Colosseum, Pantheon, Trevi Fountain, and some hidden places no one knows about.
”

  “Like what?”

  “That’s my secret . . . but you will find out.”

  “Humph.” I folded my arms over my chest.

  “Don’t be mad,” said Jonathon laughing.

  “I’m not mad.” I said.

  “Yes, you are. Do you not like surprises?”

  “I’m fine with surprises.” I stated continuing to look down at the floor of the mustang.

  “Then what’s the problem?” He asked confused. A crease had formed between his perfect brows.

  “There’s no problem, Jonathon.” I said. He decided to let the subject drop.

  In truth I love surprises. But secrets I hate, even my own. I can tell Jonathon is keeping things from me. It frightens me. I keep feeling like there’s going to be more secrets. Even small ones, like where we’re going. But in my heart I feel that there is a big secret that I don’t know. I think Jonathon is dropping hints hoping either I’ll get scared or I’ll figure it out. But what if I don’t? What if I never do? What if it does frighten me and I run away screaming? Could it be something really awful like he killed someone? Or something he only thinks is awful?

  Then I started panicking about what sort of relationship Jonathon and I have. How would Jonathon act out in public with me? Like I’m his sister? A friend? Like I’m his . . . girlfriend? I hated to even think the word; afraid of getting my hopes up.

  Jonathon’s car soared down the road passing beautiful scene after beautiful scene.

  I would love to paint the beautiful scenery. The feel of the paint brush in my hand. The sound of the brush stroking canvas. The swirling together of colors.

  I was snapped back into reality by Jonathon’s voice.

  “What are you doing?” He asked.

  “Huh?”

  “With your hand?” He motioned to my hand with was held aloft. I looked at my hand. I hadn’t even realized I was moving it. I must have been painting a picture only I could see behind my closed eyes. Of course I’d spaced out. I tend to do that a lot.

  “Oh,” I began. “I guess I was painting.” I finished.

  “You like to paint?” He asked.

  “Yeah and draw. Art is my hobby.”

  “I didn’t know that about you.”

  “Yeah, we don’t know a lot about each other.”