A Reason to Breathe

by Lorhainne Eckhart

  17

  “Someone’s here. There’s a blue Toyota Corolla parked in front of the house. It’s not supposed to be there. Whose car is it? Was that the person who scared me last night?” Jasmine said, standing at the screen door. She turned and walked past Katy, then disappeared into the kitchen, toward the back door. A second later, Katy heard the door open and slam shut.

  Okay, so that was weird, she thought. Katy had learned that Jasmine was about as similar to Trevor as a Rolls-Royce was to a pickup, but she’d learned to keep her sense of humor, as they would always have to be managing the two.

  At least Trevor was happy.

  So that Toyota was the car Becky had arrived in the night before. Katy was still trying to wrap her head around what her sister had said.

  “Becky up yet?” Steven said as he walked out of the kitchen with a go mug of coffee. He shoved the last of a muffin in his mouth and chewed.

  “Not yet, but would expect her to be up soon, considering we sound like a herd of elephants in the morning.”

  Jack and Fletcher had already left for the bus to school, and Trevor was already outside with their dad, taking care of the cattle, the horses, and everything they had to do to run the ranch.

  Steven slid his arm around her, settling his hand over her ass and pulling her closer. He shoved one hand in her faded jeans back pocket as she rose up on tiptoe and kissed him, tasting the muffin and coffee. “Later, babe,” he said. “Can’t stay for the fun. Have a jobsite I’ve got to get to, but…” He widened his eyes as he gestured with his head to the den, and she heard rustling. Maybe Becky was awake.

  She patted his shoulder as he stepped away and gave her ass a light teasing smack. “Be good,” he teased as he stepped out the door and jogged down the stairs to his pickup.

  “So is there any coffee?” she heard Becky say with a yawn as she stumbled out of the den barefoot, and Katy got a good look in the light of day at her sleep-tousled shoulder-length cut with copper and a mix of lighter highlights. She was in a light gray sweater over cotton capris. She yawned again as she strode into the kitchen.

  “So that was quite the entrance last night,” Katy said. She took in her sister, who appeared to be squinting as she pulled a mug from the cupboard and poured a coffee from the carafe, which was always full.

  Becky lifted the mug and sipped, then groaned. “Oh, this is exactly what I needed. Forgot how good Mom’s coffee is,” she said. When she let her gaze linger on Katy, there was just a moment of awkwardness from how long it had been since she’d seen her, during her dark days, at her worst.

  “Well, what can I say?” Becky began. “No one knew I was coming—and you look good, like, really good, and Steven… I guess I’ve really been away, haven’t I? Seems as if you’ve all had another life without me. You know, hearing from Mom and Dad that you two were back together and then seeing the two of you, I mean, you really look good, both of you.”

  Becky’s look was filled with concern, reminding Katy of how her family used to see her as one step from falling apart. She had to pull in a breath. That wasn’t who she was anymore. She was stronger, better, happier.

  “So you kind of dropped a bomb on us last night,” Katy said, and Becky was unsmiling. Katy was still trying to wrap her head around the fact that Tom had cheated on her.

  “Where are Mom and Dad?” Becky asked. By the way she rolled her shoulders, Katy knew she was avoiding discussing Tom.

  “Dad’s outside working. Could be out in one of the fields, for all I know. Pretty sure Mom went out to track him down. Saw her leave, so they’re probably talking about you, and Mom is likely convincing Dad all the ways he shouldn’t kill Tom.” Well, that had her sister’s attention, and from the way her jaw slackened, Katy knew she hadn’t been expecting that. “You fly all the way from London, creep in in the middle of the night, scare the crap out of Jasmine—Trevor’s girlfriend, who has Asperger’s, if you didn’t figure it out already—and then drop that bomb on us about Tom? Also, did you almost climb in bed with Jasmine?” She couldn’t help herself and actually laughed. So did her sister.

  “No, but I don’t know who was scared more, me or Jasmine. Should I apologize?”

  Katy just shook her head. “Don’t worry about it. She’s already forgotten about it, just as likely, but when she comes back in, we’ll introduce you.”

  Becky nodded and glanced past her to the door. “So she lives here?”

  No, that wasn’t something they could really manage. “She stays over a few nights a week when Trevor is working on the ranch. The other days, she’s at home with her mom. Dad, Steven, and Uncle Neil are building a cabin for Trevor and Jasmine. I don’t know if they’ll live in there together, but who knows what the future will bring?”

  “Hey, you’re up!” Brad called out as the back screen door opened and he stepped in. He was in a faded red T-shirt over blue jeans, and he stomped his cowboy boots on the mat. She spotted her mom behind him, who was in a long-sleeved paisley blouse over faded jeans.

  Her dad strode right into the kitchen and reached for Becky, pulling her into a big hug. Then he pressed a kiss to her cheek. “I missed you, in case I didn’t say it last night.”

  Her dad kept his arm around her, and she knew well that her parents missed her so much. They’d seen her only a time or two, going over to London to visit her. She had to think, but this was the first time she’d been back in…how long? It must’ve been years.

  “So he’s cheating on you, and you didn’t call? You just got on a plane and, what, rented that piece of crap in the driveway and drove from Seattle?” Brad said. Her mom too wore a grim expression.

  Becky moved away and over to the table, holding her coffee. Katy wondered whether she was going to pull out a chair and sit down, but she just rested her hand on the chair back and seemed to be considering something. She took in the bare hand where her wedding ring should have been and wondered if it had been missing the night before, too.

  “I’m sorry. I just wanted to come home and thought it would be okay. I didn’t know what else to do. Can’t we just leave it at that?” she added. Katy didn’t have to look her dad’s way to know that wasn’t going to fly.

  “No. I mean, what about your job? You were so excited about this prestigious London brokerage firm you landed an internship with, and yet here you are. You say he cheated, so he’s been having an affair?” Her dad swore under his breath, and she could see that Becky wouldn’t look his way. Her expression was pure stubbornness, and Katy was now convinced she was hiding something. “I swear, Em,” Brad said, “if I see him again and get my hands on him…”

  “That’s not going to help anything, Brad,” Emily said. “Becky’s home. She’ll get a divorce, move on, and not see him again.”

  There was a car outside, and the back door opened and Jasmine ran in. “There’s a black fancy SUV outside!” she said, sounding stressed. “Out front. You didn’t tell me someone else was coming. Why are they here?”

  Her dad went to the window and looked out.

  “Well, who is it?” Emily asked.

  Brad swore and started to the door. “Tom Campbell,” he replied.

  Katy took in Becky’s face, which seemed to have lost all color, just as she heard her dad step outside and the screen door slap closed. This had just gone from bad to worse.

  18

  Katy watched as Becky raced after their dad to the door.

  “Jasmine, go see if you can find Trevor outside,” she heard her mom say from behind her as she started to the front door, seeing Becky jogging down the steps just as her dad stopped Tom in his tracks as he walked around the SUV. Brad pulled back his fist and hit him, and his knees buckled. He went down.

  “Dad!” Becky yelled and ran to Tom, who was on the ground, blood dripping from his nose. Brad was standing over Tom, yelling something she couldn’t make out.

  “You hit him? Seriously, Dad, talk about juvenile!” Becky yelled over her shoulder.

  Emily jogged d
own the stairs and over to Brad, putting her hand on his arm. Whatever she said to him, he stepped back and lifted his hands. Katy moved closer to take in the chaos.

  Tom then got up, Becky holding his arm. “Like, what the hell was that?” he snapped.

  “You cheat on my daughter and drive in here not thinking there will be consequences?” Brad said. Katy couldn’t remember ever hearing him that angry. His voice was so quiet that she paused, taking in how still Tom had become.

  Tom turned to Becky, who winced. “You told your parents I cheated on you?” he said, then spit on the ground and wiped away the blood that was dripping. He looked up at Brad and shook his head before looking over to Becky. “I did not cheat on Becky. You know I wouldn’t do that.”

  “Becky, you said he cheated on you,” Brad said. “Did he or didn’t he?” Her dad took a step, and for a minute Katy thought Tom was going to back up. He was wary, maybe of being hit again.

  Becky still had her hand on Tom’s arm before she let it fall away, and Katy knew her sister well enough to know she was hiding something.

  “Okay, everyone inside,” Emily said. “Tom, your nose is bleeding. Go clean up in the bathroom. Becky, answer your father. You were asked a question, but here you are, saying nothing…”

  “Fine, no, he didn’t cheat—as far as I know, but he could have!” Becky leaned in, and her mood had suddenly exploded. Katy had never seen her sister turn on a dime like that. She turned away from them and really dug into each step. Anyone could see by the way she moved that she was furious. The door slapped closed behind her, and Tom pulled his sleeve over his lip beneath his nose to wipe the blood away.

  “What was that about?” Brad said, shaking out his hand. She realized by the way he fisted it that it had to be smarting.

  “She’s angry at me.” Tom spit on the ground again.

  “You know what, Tom? Go clean up,” Emily said. “Katy, get Tom some ice for his nose, and your dad for his fist. I can’t believe you hit him, Brad.”

  Tom strode into the house, and Katy stood outside with her mom and dad, still trying to wrap her head around the fact that her dad had really hit him. She’d never seen him do that before, ever.

  “So Becky says he was cheating,” Katy said, thinking aloud. “Then you hit him, and Becky comes clean and says he didn’t, but he could have? Sounds like a fight, but I’ve never known Becky to make up something like that.”

  “I’d say it’s time we sit our daughter down and find out what’s going on with her,” Brad said.

  Katy watched as her dad strode into the house, and her mom gestured for them to follow. Inside, she spotted Tom standing at the bottom of the stairs, holding Becky in his arms. Was she crying?

  The door slapped closed, and her mom walked into the bathroom off the den and came out a minute later with a cloth. “Here, Tom, for the blood. I’ll get you some ice.”

  Tom took the cloth and pressed it to his nose, then somehow turned Becky to walk over to the sofa, his arm across her shoulders. The spatter of blood stood out on his light blue dress shirt, and his navy dress pants were creased, likely from sitting on the plane for hours. He had a five o’clock shadow.

  Becky sat on the sofa, but Tom stood, looking down at her, wiping the blood from under his nose. Then he pulled the cloth away, pressing his finger to the bridge of his nose, and he tossed a hesitant glance to her dad.

  “Well, it’s not broken, but it’s likely swelling,” Emily said as she returned with the ice that Katy was supposed to have gotten. She handed Tom a Ziploc bag full and then handed a bag of peas to Brad, who took them and pressed them over his knuckles, which were red and looked a little swollen.

  “So mind telling me what’s going on here, Becky?” Brad asked.

  Tom stared down at Becky as if giving her time to pull it together and tell them all what was going on, but she said nothing, so he replied, “Becky is pregnant.”

  This time, Becky pulled her hands from her tear-stained face and glanced up at him. “And it’s all his fault.”

  19

  “So not only do I not get to have my old room back, but you and Steven are still living here, and Trevor has a girlfriend who stays over sometimes in the spare room? Well, who would have thought? I mean, this is quite the homecoming,” Becky said from the doorway of the den after having been introduced to Jasmine, who had finally come back into the house with Trevor.

  Katy hesitated. Maybe Jasmine had taken it the wrong way, staring at Becky long and hard. Becky wasn’t sure if it was from fear, worry, or the suspicion that she was going to do something to scare her again.

  Now she was sitting back in a chair, drawing something on a notepad, and Trevor had the TV on, watching some anime show, sitting on the sofa she’d slept on the night before. Jasmine got up and put her arms around Trevor’s neck from behind him, and he turned around. For a moment, from the expression on his face, his body language, she was sure he was going to hug her back.

  “I have my necklace from my mom,” Jasmine said. “You know they make me feel secure and comfortable. Do you want to see the others? I brought them all, all the stones. The amethyst is the best, and the rose quartz, and then there’s the emerald stone…”

  “No, thanks,” Trevor interrupted her before she could go on and on, and he turned around and faced the TV again. “Anime is on. You should watch it too,” he added, staring at the TV and not looking her way.

  Jasmine, though, didn’t say anything. In fact, she hurried past Katy and Becky out of the room and to the stairs, then ran up them.

  “Jasmine where are you going?” Katy called out to her, but she didn’t stop.

  “To pack. It’s time to pack. Time to go home. Call my mom, please.”

  Becky lifted her hands, because she didn’t know what to say to explain the odd behavior, but Katy just shrugged.

  “It’s just something you’re going to have to get used to,” she said. “Jasmine has her things that she fixates on, but Trevor and her really do make each other happy, and it’s just as well she goes home until things can be sorted out here. She doesn’t know you and Tom yet, and with you two here, we kind of need the spare room. She doesn’t need to be in on all this tension—like you’re pregnant and it’s Tom’s fault, somehow? Seriously? Is this like something he did on purpose?”

  Katy lifted her hands, and Becky took in her sister. Her blond hair was wavy and tucked behind her ears, just past her shoulders, and she wore faded blue jeans and a blue and black blouse. She seemed so different from the sister who’d fallen apart. She really seemed to be standing with both feet on the ground.

  Becky was embarrassed at how she’d acted, but she’d been an emotional train wreck since finding out two days ago, or was it three? She wasn’t sure. The time, the travel, and the jet lag were nipping at her.

  She just shook her head and peeked around the corner, seeing the kitchen and her dad and mom talking. She knew Tom was there too, but she just hadn’t found the courage to walk in there and face them. Maybe Katy knew, as she rested her hand on her shoulder and pushed her further into the den, over to the sofa, where she picked up the remote and flicked off the TV. “Trevor, go help Jasmine pack. She’s going home tonight.”

  Trevor sighed. “Hey, I was watching that.”

  “No, go help your girlfriend. It’s what you’re supposed to do.”

  Trevor stood up. “Fine,” he said, then strode out of the room, and she heard him calling out to Jasmine.

  “Come on, sit,” Katy said. “You kind of created a pickle here, Becky. You said Tom cheated on you, so I’m kind of confused…” She turned to the side and tucked her foot under her legs, and Becky was relieved she wouldn’t have to go in and face anyone yet.

  She sat down and pulled up both her knees, looking over to Katy to see an expectant expression. “He didn’t cheat,” Becky said, “although there’s this one intern who works under him who’s had eyes for him for years, and she’s not been discreet about her interest.” It even sou
nded pathetic—like she was just a jealous wife.

  “And…” Katy started, trying to get her to finish. “Come on, Becky. Did he cross a line or return that interest?”

  What could she say? She’d seen him hugging her when she’d walked in one night while they were supposed to have been meeting for dinner. He’d said it was her first loss of a patient, and she’d taken it hard.

  She finally shook her head. “No, but it doesn’t make it easier, seeing how women want him.”

  Katy glanced over the sofa and then back to her. “So why did you lie? Why didn’t you just say you were pregnant?”

  How could she explain to Katy, who had wanted a husband and children, that her dream was anything but? She’d married Tom expecting something extraordinary, yet everything about her life was heading in a direction she didn’t want.

  “I never wanted kids,” she said. “I told Tom that. He said he was fine with it, but I knew he wasn’t, not really. I saw the way he was with friends who had kids, and I knew there would come a day when he would try to talk me into it. I never expected to get pregnant. I shouldn’t have gotten pregnant, but I got sick, picked up an infection, was on antibiotics, and you know what Tom said when I told him?”

  “I said antibiotics have been known to reduce the effectiveness of birth control,” Tom said as he strode into the den, still wearing the same dress shirt with blood stains, although his nose and face were wiped clean of blood. His nose was a bit swollen, and she couldn’t help feeling absolutely horrible. It was her fault, and here he was, still speaking to her.

  He rested his hands on the back of the sofa and stared down at Becky and Katy. Katy looked like she was considering slipping out.

  “You should have known,” she said, and he lifted his hands. She didn’t miss the spark in his eyes, that flash of anger from a man who’d been pushed to the edge.

  “Maybe, but it’s not for sure, Becky, and that’s an unrealistic expectation. You and I both know the night that would be responsible for your predicament, and that was all you, baby—showing up at the hospital after twenty-two straight hours and camping out with me in the on-call room. That was you who straddled me, you who slid your hands over me and rode me.”