Empath

by Evans, S. Usher

  "Please," Lauren repeated, hoping that it would resonate with the monarch.

  "The empath is stalling," Probert growled to the king. "Take her, sire. She will not be able to resist."

  "No," Idris said. "I do not know what kind of horrors this empath can work upon me. Put her in the dungeon until she is more amenable."

  Lauren's mouth opened in shock, and she envisioned being trapped in a windowless room, forced to endure the whims and anxieties of the king and Probert. The panic lit in her heart and spread across her body like a wildfire.

  Before she could open her mouth again, more hands grabbed her.

  There were too many emotions, too many thoughts. She was going to explode from it all. She needed to get away, get away from their hands; their emotions were drowning her with too much, just too much.

  "I will take it from you…"

  The Anghenfil was there in her mind. It was a beacon, a talisman against the blowing winds of her mind. She could focus on it and ignore everything else.

  "I am here for you, Lauren…"

  She couldn't breathe. She felt trapped in everyone else's emotions and needed to get out of there. If she could just leave here, everything would be better, she'd feel better. There were too many people in there, too many voices, too crowded and she was afraid and scared and—

  "Let me take your fear from you…"

  She released her tight grip.

  "Yes…"

  She was on the floor; they had released her and she was gasping for air. Footsteps thundered around her, screams of fear and cries from soldiers echoed in the cavernous room. She lay on the steps of the king's throne, but the king was no where to be found, and neither was Probert. In fact, everyone seemed to have forgotten about her—but why?

  Then she heard the beating wings and an earsplitting roar that carried through the giant hall.

  It was the sound that she had been waiting to hear all this time.

  She turned up to the stained glass window above them as a dark shadow crossed in front of it.

  Then, with a mighty blast, it shattered, and the Anghenfil perched on the stone wall, opening its giant, dragon-like jaw and releasing a stream of fire into the room.

  More screams, more cries, and more thundering footsteps as the crowd dispersed frantically, avoiding the creature's flames and the swords of the soldiers pouring into the room to defeat the monster.

  Lauren could feel the Anghenfil's eyes on her and her heart sank into her stomach. She had called it here; she had finally given into the temptation. She couldn't tear her eyes away from the monster. It inhaled deeply and spewed red-hot fire into the room, lighting the tapestry-covered walls with bright flames.

  This was it.

  What she had been dreading for weeks.

  She closed her eyes as the tears gathered in her eyes, and she bowed her head in acceptance—

  "LAUREN!"

  "Oh God, Cefin!" Lauren gasped, having completely forgotten about him. He stood in front of her with Bessie, holding the old mare's reins in his hands as she bucked angrily in the chaos. No one seemed to notice or care that he had ridden the horse into the great hall.

  "Come on!" he cried. "We have to get out of here before the entire castle goes up in flames!"

  Lauren knew that the right thing to do would be to stay there, to accept her punishment. She would submit to the fate she had been destined for since the moment she set foot in that world, and give herself to the beast.

  But she was still a coward.

  Slowly, painfully, she nodded and pulled herself to her feet, following Cefin as he led her and Bessie out of the burning castle.

  ***

  "You should ride Bessie for a while," Cefin said, breaking the silent night air between them.

  "No," Lauren said, wrapping her arms tighter around herself. She didn't want to touch anything, to open her mind to the Anghenfil in any way. In their rush out of the city, it soared overhead, a trail of ashen smoke billowing behind it. Lauren cowered behind Bessie, and Cefin comforted her the best he could, still not knowing the source of her fear and her misery.

  Now, hours later, she wondered how many people died in Traegaron because of her, because she was too afraid to do what was needed.

  Choking back tears, she prayed that Cefin wouldn't notice her anguish, but he seemed to be more attuned to her than ever.

  "I won't let them hurt you," Cefin said, patting Bessie on the neck. "I promise. If they follow you to Rhianu—"

  "It's not them I'm worried about."

  "I will kill the Anghenfil for you," Cefin snarled. "When we get back, I shall—"

  "Oh God," Lauren couldn't take it anymore and fell to her knees, sobbing. She didn't deserve any of the happiness that Cefin promised. She couldn't stand that others continued to march head-first into terrifying situations while she remained hidden on the sidelines.

  Cefin dropped Bessie's reins and rushed over to her, kneeling beside her.

  "I'm sorry," Lauren sniffed, as another sob shook through her. But when she looked at Cefin's face, he was staring down at her necklace.

  The stone was now a deep, ebony black.

  "Lauren?"

  Lauren couldn't take the questions in his eyes. With an angry cry, she yanked the chain hard, breaking it, and tossed the necklace as far away as she possibly could, before sinking down to sit in the cold grass.

  She felt his hand slide across her back. Her whole body stiffened, but her mind remained clear.

  "Wait a second," she said, sitting up, still feeling his hand on her back—and nothing else. Forgetting about the stone, she slid her hands under his cheeks to cup them gently.

  "Oh my God," she said, her hands off and looking at them. "I don't…I don't…I don't have my powers anymore." She scrambled to her feet and ran to where she had thrown her necklace, searching the low grass for the stone. Her fingers came into contact with the cool rock and she rushed over to Cefin and touched his arm—

  Her powers are gone?

  Lauren came back into her own mind as the stone fell from her fingertips. She began laughing maniacally as she spun around the empty plain.

  "Lauren?" Cefin said, rushing over to her. "What is it?"

  "The necklace!" Lauren exclaimed, feeling happier than she'd felt in years. "Oh God, Cefin, it was the necklace the whole time!"

  "Lauren, calm down," Cefin smiled. "I'm confused, what—"

  In response, Lauren jumped into his arms, pressing her lips to him in the most long-awaited kiss of her life. He was shocked, his arms laying limply by his side and remaining there, even when she broke away from him and hung at his neck.

  "You aren't reading me?" he said, finally catching on.

  She shook her head happily, and his hands finally slid around her in the most amazing embrace she had ever felt.

  "Your necklace was the source of your power?" he asked.

  "All this time. All I had to do was just take off that stupid—"

  Cefin pressed his lips to hers, cutting her off. Her head was spinning now, realizing that everything she had ever wanted was now here in her grasp.

  Lauren wanted to say so much to him. To thank him for saving her, to tell him that she'd wanted him to hold her, to tell him she ached for him. But words seemed ineffective at this point. With a sly grin, she pulled him down to the uneven ground to show him exactly how she felt.

  ***

  They lay under the bright moon curled in each others arms, covered with naught but Lauren's discarded dress and the night sky. She was pressed as close to him as she could be; she didn't realize how starved she'd been for human touch. It had been weeks since she'd touched anything other than a farm animal, and Cefin made her skin sing with happiness.

  She was nearly bursting with emotion, but these were all hers—and it was better and more satisfying than anything she'd ever felt in her life. His arms were strong and held her against him, and she reveled in the fact that he wanted her. She didn't even mind that he seemed to be qui
te a novice kisser—something she missed the first time, but she was more than happy to show him what to do. And the sex…well, it wasn't really that good, if she were being honest. She was pretty sure Cefin was a virgin, and never learned the finer points of sex. Rug burn was an understatement.

  As if on cue, he kissed her again, leaving a trail of slobber on her face. She tried to sound enthusiastic as she leaned into him, especially when he beamed down at her. This close to him, she could hear his thoughts, but they were a distant music, not front row at a rock concert.

  But he noticed her reticence. "Is it back? Did I hurt you?"

  "No, it just feels nice," she lied. "I forgot what it was like for someone to hold me like this."

  "I've wanted to hold you for weeks now," he whispered, brushing her hair out of her eyes. "It's been painful not to."

  "You're telling me," she said wryly. She hadn't had anyone hold her since—Nope, she hissed at her mind.

  "I didn't hurt you, did I?" he asked, gently stroking her arm. "I've heard that the first time can be…painful."

  Lauren blushed slightly, wondering if she should tell him she'd been sexually active for almost five years or if now was the time to show him what foreplay was. Instead, she shook her head with a plastered-on smile.

  He could sense the hesitation. "Did I?"

  "I mean," Lauren said, looking up at him. "It wasn't my…well…I've done this before…"

  "Oh," Cefin said, and she could feel a flash of jealousy from him.

  "I mean, he's gone now," Lauren said, quieter. Josh's face came to the forefront of her mind again and she wondered angrily why she still missed him. She had her One, so why was she still thinking of her old life? "He's gone now."

  "Dead?" Cefin asked, sounding almost hopeful.

  "No." Lauren shook her head. "We just…" She struggled to figure a way to say it. "We fell out of love, I guess."

  "Impossible for anyone to fall out of love with you," Cefin stroked the hair out of her face. His unspoken affection was warming, but didn't quite encompass the sadness that had taken root suddenly.

  "We were very close," Lauren continued. "But then it just…"

  "How does one fall out of love?"

  "I wanted to get married, and he wanted to explore the world." It was the simple explanation, and prevented going into too much detail about her complicated and miserable feelings about the whole matter.

  "Wait," Cefin said, sitting up and looking at her. "You were to be married?"

  "No." Lauren shook her head. "I wanted to be though. He didn't."

  "What man in his right mind wouldn't want to marry you?"

  Lauren shrugged; she'd asked herself that same question more times than she could count. Though when the question came from herself, it sounded much more accusatory than when Cefin said it. Almost like there was something wrong with her that made him leave. But those thoughts were banished to the back of her mind, and now that Cefin was here, she'd never have to think of them again.

  "I would marry you," Cefin professed, a mischievous grin on his face. "And then we would explore the world together."

  "I'd like that." She smiled, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. Here was what she wanted: a man who wanted to marry her and be with her, and yet she was still holding back. Something was still scaring her about all of this, about him. It was too perfect, and she hadn't done enough in her life to warrant this kind of perfection and love. And there was still the problem of the Anghenfil—their connection appeared severed (or it was not at home in the happy space that was her brain), there was still underlying fear that bringing the monster to Traegaron would come back to haunt her.

  And there was also the problem of—

  "Ssh," Cefin said, cupping her cheek. "You're thinking again."

  "I do that."

  "Your heart is racing," he said, looking at her. "What are you worried about?"

  There was the question again, the open door to let him in and share with him all of her problems and anxious thoughts. He loved her now, this vision of herself that she had put forth for him, but would he still love her if he knew the depth of her guilt? Would he still love her if he knew she was responsible for the Anghenfil's appearance at Traegaron?

  "Lauren," Cefin interrupted again, placing his hand on her bare chest where her heart was. "You are so worried, my darling."

  "Darling?" Lauren smiled, liking the sound of that. She placed her head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat, slow and steady.

  "What concerns you? My proposal of marriage was too sudden?"

  "No. No, it wasn't. I would love to marry you."

  Worrying now was stupid and pointless. She had everything that she wanted right here, and she wasn't going to sabotage it. After all, Cefin had just proposed marriage to her—wasn't that all she'd been missing from Josh?

  "Does that mean you'll stay?" Cefin asked sleepily.

  "Stay," Lauren murmured against his chest. She tried to remember why she wanted to go home, and all she seemed to remember at that moment was Cefin. He would continue to protect her from all of the problems of this world and from the monsters in her own mind.

  "Yes, I will stay with you," she whispered as they drifted off to sleep.

  ***

  As the sun broke, Lauren awoke groggy and freezing and miserable, until she remembered where she was and with whom she'd been sleeping. She looked for Cefin, spying him a little ways away, fully dressed and standing next to Bessie, who was eating some grass. Lauren was still naked and lying on the itchy grass and stone, and so she quickly pulled on her dress to warm herself up.

  "Morning," she said with a yawn as she strolled over to Cefin. His face lit up when he saw her and he pulled her into his arms, kissing her forehead lovingly. She sighed like an idiot; she missed having this kind of affection.

  "Good morning, my love," he said.

  "My love, hm?" Lauren whispered to herself before looking up at him. "Did you really mean it?"

  "Mean what?"

  Lauren's heart began to pound. Had she not heard him right? Was he just speaking in generalities?

  "The whole…marriage…thing…" she muttered.

  A smile blossomed on his face and he squeezed her again. "Of course I meant it. I love you."

  Lauren grinned, all of her nerves disappearing just as quickly as they had arisen. She and Cefin were going to be married. Sure, she didn't have a ring or a Facebook to post to and shove it in everyone's face, but she had a man who was handsome as sin, who was crazy about her. So what if he wasn't good in bed? That was no big deal; she could teach him. And hey, she could even show him exactly what she wanted, instead of him trying to do what he wanted. That was something to be excited about.

  Again, he was sloppy as he kissed her, his tongue ramming into her mouth. She tried her best to sound excited and added it to the list of things she needed to teach him.

  "Well, my darling," he said, looking down at her. "We'd best get a move on before these plains become crowded with travelers."

  Or the king's soldiers, she added silently. She was nervous about their escape; what if they came for her in the village? But she shoved that thought in the back of her mind as Cefin smiled down at her.

  "I cannot believe I get to hold you every day," he whispered. Lauren giggled, not quite believing herself that her perfect Angel-man was actually in love with her, wanted to marry her. He lifted her up on top of Bessie as if she weighed nothing.

  "Are you going to join me, my good sir?" Lauren asked.

  "Yes, just one moment." He bent down in the low grasses and picked something up off the ground.

  Her necklace.

  "Get rid of that," Lauren snapped, panic spreading across her at the very sight of it.

  "We should bring this with us," Cefin said, examining it closely. "Perhaps Siors—"

  "Get rid of it," Lauren repeated, and Bessie stomped her foot underneath her, probably sensing Lauren's agitation.

  "My darling, I—"

 
"I don't want that thing." Lauren couldn't even look at it. "It's been nothing but misery."

  "Darling—"

  "I don't want it!" Lauren screamed, and Cefin nearly dropped the stone in surprise at her anger.

  "All right, all right," he acquiesced, reaching back and hurling the stone into the plains. "It's gone now, my love."

  Lauren nodded, looking down at Bessie's mane at her fingertips. The sight of that stone was a trigger to her, reminding her of all of the terrible things that she was keeping just beneath the surface. The protective structures she'd built over the past night crumbled and she struggled to remember why she'd been so happy before.

  Cefin pulled himself up behind her and wrapped his strong arms around her, pulling her back closer to him.

  "Ssh," he whispered against her head. "I didn't mean to upset you."

  "I hate that thing," Lauren murmured, leaning back into him and letting his presence chase away her fears. "I never want to see it again. I never want to be an empath again."

  "Then neither shall happen," he said, sliding his hands around her to hold onto the reins and nudging Bessie to walk forward.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  Although the sight of the necklace had rattled Lauren, the slow plod across the plain was actually quite pleasant, snuggled as she was in Cefin's strong arms. The farther away they traveled from her stone, the happier she became, and the more she began to accept that it was really over. Every so often, Cefin would press his lips to her temple, and she would sigh happily.

  It was too soon when they arrived in Heulog at the base of the mountains and had to deal with the merchant whose carriage they had left in Traegaron. He was none-too-pleased that Cefin hadn't made good on his promise to sell his goods, and even more upset that Cefin had left his unsold merchandise in the castle.

  While Cefin argued with the man, Lauren placed her hand on her chest, reaching for her necklace out of habit. The movement reminded her of all the times she would call on it for support and for comfort, a reminder of the home she had left behind. She had worn it proudly every day, hoping that one day it would give her a way to get home.

  But now, with the stone somewhere in the plains where she and Cefin made love, it was quite certain she would never get home. She tried to rationalize her own disappointment, hoping that she could find the right thing to say to herself to make it go away. Although she'd never get back to California, she'd also never have to sit at a computer and work a boring data entry job. She'd never see her mom and dad again, but she had Aerona, Siors, and even the little twins. They were her new family now.