by Cassi Carver
The field was growing darker. With not a lamp in sight, it was almost too dark to make out the color of Gavin’s jacket, much less the rich hazel of his eyes. “It won’t be much longer now. Sundown is around the time he shows up at my apartment. You don’t think he’ll go there first, do you?”
“If he’s materializing under the protection of night, he likely wouldn’t travel to San Diego for another three hours. Considering his body seems to be tied to this place, my guess is that he bides his time here—perhaps consciously, perhaps in limbo—until he feels the day fade where you are.”
“Yeah, you’re right. I hadn’t thought of tha—” Before Kara could even finish her sentence, she felt what she could only describe as a shimmer in the atmosphere around them. It started as a small, undulating wave, but as the tremor grew, it shook the ground, loosing a rush of leaves from the canopy above them.
Gavin leapt to his feet when a naked form, curled in a ball, started to gain substance just three feet from where they sat.
The moans caught Kara’s attention first. Pure agony rising from Julian’s soul and making its way up his throat. He writhed on the spongy bed of leaves, his limbs spasming, his hands curled tight like a bird of prey, his black wings pinned to his back.
When Kara lunged toward him, Gavin grabbed her arm. “Let him come to first.”
She shook off his grip and dropped to her knees beside Julian, taking his cheeks in her hands. “Julian?”
His eyes were unfocused, looking everywhere and nowhere at once. Finally, his gaze settled on Kara’s face. “I came back to you.” He frowned, squinting in pain, seeming to take in the tree behind her. “No—you came to me.”
Kara smiled and as her eyes welled, a pulse of emotion bubbled up from her chest as a hiccup of laughter. “I came for you.”
When his eyes began to roll back, Kara’s heart misfired like a dying engine. She pressed her wrist to his mouth. “Drink.”
“No. No more. I am finished. Seeing you again was enough.”
Her nostrils flared, and she growled, “Well, I’m not finished. Stop being such a damn baby and drink.”
This time she shoved her wrist so hard against his fangs, she felt the prick of one sharp tooth against her vein. When the first drop of blood hit Julian’s tongue, he forgot his idiotic plans for martyrdom and latched on, biting through her thin skin to make a large gash there. Kara stifled a squeak of pain and tried to calm her pulse, but her body was telling her to fight back against this predator.
She could get through this, she told herself. She’d give him her whole damn arm if he needed it. After a minute or two, she noticed his body gaining strength. His muscles looked fuller, his movements more precise and graceful, his suckling more…sensuous.
“Save some for later, princess,” Gavin said wryly.
Julian yanked back his bloody lips and shot into the air quicker than Kara could track with her eyes. His glistening wings burst from his shoulders to their full breadth, the tip of each feather looking like a sharply pointed dagger. “Who is this man?” he hissed, then his piercing gaze skimmed over the countryside. “His energy is mingled with yours as far as the eye can see.”
When his mouth opened and his lips quivered with the beginning of a roar—a roar that would forever haunt her—she leapt toward Gavin and threw her body in front of his. “This is Gavin! You love Gavin. He’s like a brother to you.”
“Gavin. Yes, I remember your stories of Gavin…the one you met first.” The slant of Julian’s glowing red eyes reminded Kara of a bird of prey. “You lowly dog, hiding behind a woman,” he sneered.
When Gavin grasped Kara by the shoulders, a move she knew would send her to her ass somewhere far from the strike zone, she twirled in his arms to face him and wrapped her arms around his middle. “No, Gavin. Just let him calm down for a minute.”
She thought she would see anger and indignation in his eyes, but they were wide with some other emotion building there. Maybe hope.
“Julian, my brother…is it you?” Gavin laughed out loud. “You bastard. The oldest living demibreed and the first of the prophesied Shadow Risings. I thought I had lost you forever.”
“I don’t know you.” His words echoed the same thing he’d said to Kara, but as she released Gavin and turned to look at Julian, she saw uncertainty in his eyes.
With her index finger pointing toward the ground, Kara approached Julian with a chastising glare. “Come down here. Let’s not waste time like this.”
Maybe it was to Kara’s advantage that Julian didn’t remember how Aniliáre were usually treated. She had the feeling she couldn’t get away with talking to just any black-wing like she did to him.
With his narrowed eyes never leaving Gavin, Julian softly touched down. He was as naked as the day he was born, and Kara wasn’t sure why clothes didn’t seem to stay on him like they did when Gavin flashed. Though, she had to admit, he wasn’t exactly wearing clothes the last time he’d left her bed.
Eyes still focused on his adversary, Julian opened his arms to Kara and she came to him, clinging tight. She’d already forgotten her damaged wrist, but he brought it to his mouth and breathed life into it, healing in seconds what would have taken her much longer. She pressed her cheek to his warm chest. Not even the cold affected him. He enfolded her in his onyx wings, creating a sanctuary of warmth and love that she never wanted to leave.
It was hard to speak when all she wanted to do was be present in the moment and feel. His heartbeat. His taut skin. The dark, silky hair that brushed her forehead when he leaned down to kiss her. But his safety was more important than stealing a moment for herself.
She found the strength to pull away from the velvety softness of his lips and open her eyes. “I brought Gavin here to help you find your way to where you’re supposed to be.”
“I’m supposed to be with you.”
“I wish that were true, baby. But this place is killing you. You’re spirit now, and you need to reside in the land of the spirits.” Then like a ridiculous sales pitch, she added, “You’re going to love the Shadowland. There’s nothing you can’t do there. You’ll be strong and healthy. Right, Gavin?” She nudged Julian’s wing down, ready to bring Gavin into the discussion.
“Yes.” He approached the pair very slowly. “We don’t have much time, Julian. You’ll need plenty of blood to make the trip, and we need to go before you’re too weak. If you’ve really been here weeks, I’m amazed you were able to return at all. I wouldn’t expect this miracle again.”
Julian acted as if Gavin hadn’t spoken. His jaw tight, he lifted Kara’s chin. “You’ll go with me.”
“She can’t travel to the Shadowland. She hasn’t begun the transition to maturity, and her body wouldn’t be able to endure it.”
Julian’s lips parted in a fierce growl. “Who are you to tell me I can’t take her?”
Kara felt dark power pooling around Julian, ready for release. She soothed her hands down his sides. “Like it or not, Gavin’s right. Don’t shoot the messenger, Jules.”
Gavin chuckled. “Yes, I second what she said.”
Kara was surprised Gavin didn’t look more frightened. He might have been if she’d told him the stories of what Julian had been like at first—not even a trace of his former self. “So, what now?” she asked Gavin.
“Get him out of the cold, feed him again and then make it to somewhere I can flash.”
Kara gathered up both blankets and brought them to Julian. “Put your wings away so I can wrap these around you.”
He glanced at her face, his black eyes appraising the situation, before at last, he allowed his wings to recede into his back. She tucked the first blanket around his shoulders, unable to stop herself from skimming her fingers across his skin. The next blanket she wrapped around his waist to cover him neck to ankles.
“Do you remember the way back to the cabin?” Gavin asked.
Julian’s lips peeled away from his teeth. Kara took his hand and glanced at Gavin, adding quietly, “He doesn
’t like to be asked what he remembers. Just lead the way.”
They didn’t have much to say on the one-mile hike back to the cabin. Kara’s heart was too heavy. If what Gavin said was true, she might be saying goodbye to Julian tonight for a very long time.
Walking through the front door of Julian’s home, a place he didn’t even remember, gave Kara no comfort. She sat him at the table and went to look through his dresser for something to warm his feet. When she came back out, Gavin was leaning against the kitchen counter, his arms crossed over his chest, staring at Julian. And Julian was staring back at him. Kara knelt down beside Julian and worked the thick socks over his feet.
“He doesn’t need them, you know. There’s no human left in him,” Gavin said.
“Well, there’s some human left in me,” she fired back, “and I want his feet to be warm.”
She squeezed Julian’s arches through the thick cotton. She just couldn’t stop touching him. If he had to travel to the Shadowland tonight, she would let him go. But she wasn’t sure she could survive parting with him this time. She wondered if her heart would just shrivel up and blow away, like the leaves under his tree.
“When you’re both feeling up to it, we can start walking back to town. I’ll rest easier when I’m out of this land and able to fly again. The sooner I lead Julian to the Shadowland, the better.”
Julian opened his mouth to speak, but then he looked unsure and closed his lips. At the same time, the lights in the house flickered, mirroring his turmoil. He perched on the chair, and Kara sat at his feet, resting her hand on his thigh. “What is it?” she asked. “You can say it.”
“Tell me about the Shadowland.”
Kara met Gavin’s eyes, and he pushed away from the counter and pulled up a chair on Kara’s other side. “You could almost say it’s magical, Julian. It is a place much different from this one. Here, the Earth is governed by the laws of nature and reality. The Shadowland is made of will.”
Julian’s brows bunched together. “Whose will?”
“The Sons of the Sky. The Aniliáre. That’s what you are now.” Gavin’s voice was almost reverent. “It can be a place of infinite beauty. Anything you can imagine, Jules, you will one day be able to do there.”
Julian rested his hand on Kara’s. “Then why do I sense your unease?”
Gavin nodded, not denying it. “Because it’s also a place of darkness. The ones with the strongest power, the strongest will, rule over their weaker brothers. The Aniliáre are territorial, and I’m not sure what they’ll make of the Shadow Rising. As much as it pains me, they aren’t the type to welcome you with open arms.”
Kara realized she was squeezing Julian’s thigh and relaxed her grip. “What can we do?”
“I’ll take him to a place where no one has made their claim.” He met Julian’s eyes. “It may look barren to you, a never-ending mist, but once you learn to conjure with your will, you can add to the landscape in any way you like. This cabin that you’ve loved for so many years would be simple to construct.”
“How?”
Gavin paused, and his lips tilted down. “I’m…not sure. I’ve seen it done, but Demiáre don’t have that ability. I can’t tell you how.”
“Do you have any friends there who can teach him?” Kara asked.
“I’m not sure it’s possible to be friends with a black-wing.” As if realizing what he’d said, Gavin smiled at Julian. “Present company excluded, of course.”
“What about the one who told you and Julian where to find me? If he was connected to my father and knew Julian before he—” she almost said died, but caught herself just in time, “—got his new wings, would he be willing to help?”
Gavin gripped the armrests of his chair. “You’re asking me to predict how the Aniliáre are going to respond when they learn of Julian’s rising. It’s never happened before, Kara. And I need to be honest with you and my brother-lord—it may not go well for him.”
Kara stood and went to stand behind Julian, but he was silent, seeming to take it all in. “What do you mean it may not go well for him? Do you think he’s in danger?” Her hands were shaking, so she wrapped them around her middle. “How the hell can a virtually omnipotent being be in danger?”
Gavin shoved out of his chair. “Because he’s weak. Look at him.” He gestured to Julian. “He doesn’t even know how to escape from the Shadowland if he’s in trouble.”
“Aren’t you going to show him how?”
“I can take him there, but it’s not near as easy as flashing on the surface. It took me months of traveling with a guide before I’d mastered it. And Julian isn’t strong enough yet to even attempt it on his own.”
When Kara laid her hand on his shoulder, Julian grasped it. “Is it really that difficult? It might be weeks before I can return to Kara?”
“Jules.” Gavin shook his head slowly. “It might be years.”
“You said something about a guide. Can’t you just guide Julian back once he’s better?”
“I don’t think you understand, princess. It’s difficult enough for me to transport another silver-wing, but a black-wing… I attempted it with Teras when he’d been injured, and I barely escaped the Abyss in one piece. To transport Julian there tonight will take every ounce of strength I have. And there’s always a chance…” His voice trailed off.
“What?” she asked.
He shrugged. “That I won’t make it back.”
Her mouth fell open. “You could get trapped up there?”
“Not in the Shadowland. In the Abyss.”
“Oh, hell no.” She dropped her forehead against the crown of Julian’s hair.
Julian shifted in his seat. “Tell me about this place. The Abyss.”
“You know the Abyss. You’ve probably felt it pulling at you every night you materialize on the surface.”
“But what is it?” he prodded.
“It’s nothingness. It’s the place between the worlds that unravels your soul if you stay too long.”
Kara frowned. “The sludge?”
Gavin cocked his head. “The what?”
“The sludge that I feel when I flash with you.”
“Is that what it feels like to you? It’s different for everyone. For me, it feels as though the strands of my very DNA are unraveling, on the verge of disappearing forever. But I think we can all agree that it’s dark and painful. It was never meant to be a final resting place.” He pinned his gaze on Julian. “I won’t lie to you. As weak as you are, you have one wing in the Abyss, my brother. I’ve seen this during war. I witnessed it with Kara’s father.”
“My father? That’s where he is? Caught in that hell for all eternity?”
Gavin nodded. “I’m so sorry, princess. It takes an exceeding amount of power for one Aniliáre to cast another into the Abyss, but here on the surface, the rules change. Earth was never meant to be home to the true Sons of the Sky. And Julian is weak. If he stays here any longer, he will be cast out by this realm. When that happens, if he can’t make it to the Shadowland, the Abyss will take him. And when you go deep into the Abyss…there is no coming back.”
Kara felt like she was going to vomit. “So the choice is, Julian stays and gets sucked into the Abyss, or he goes and gets picked on by the old-timers, where one of them could try to send him to the Abyss anyway.”
She drew in a deep breath, hoping it would help ease her lightheadedness so she could think clearly. “He has a better chance with the second option, but if I ask you to take him, then you’re not even one hundred percent sure you’ll have the strength to travel back. How can I ask you to do that?”
“You can’t,” Gavin replied. “The burden isn’t yours. I may not have believed at first that this black-wing was my brother-lord, but now I’m convinced. I will carry him to the farthest reaches of the Shadowland, where he may live in peace. I could do no less for him.”
Julian rose and the blankets fell. “I will not be swaddled and carried like a child. I’ll find my own
way.”
Kara grasped his arm. “No, Julian. That’s the worst idea ever. I’d rather you hide out in the Shadowland until we can figure this out than risk losing you. When I mature, Gavin said I’ll be able to travel there. I’ll come to you if you can’t come to me.”
Julian scowled, his gaze running over Gavin from top to bottom. “Why would he risk his existence to bring you to me? I don’t know him.”
“It doesn’t take half the energy to travel with a female as it does a wounded black-wing. I’ll be fine.”
But Kara saw something in his eyes. Something he wasn’t telling them. “What else, Gavin?”
“Nothing. It’s been decided. Feed him now so we can begin our journey.”
It felt as if the floor shifted under her feet. “You’re taking him now?”
“It has to be tonight. You knew this.”
“I know, but…” I’m not ready.
Julian turned and met Kara’s eyes. “This is not how I’ll spend my last night with you.”
Gavin shook his head. “You don’t have much choice, Jules. I saw how weak you were when you woke. You won’t be coming back. Not for a while.”
“I’m still strong enough to take us from this place,” Julian said to Kara, gesturing to the room they were standing in. “I can take your friend to somewhere he can use his wings. He can use them to leave us in peace. If this is my last night, I want to spend it where my memories are—memories of my time with you.” He took Kara’s hand. “Will you go with me?”
She squeezed his fingers. “Anywhere.”
“You understand that every minute you linger here might be your last?” Gavin asked him.
Julian nodded.
Gavin just looked at them, not bothering to argue. “Where to?”
Holding Kara tightly by one hand, Julian extended his other hand to Gavin. “Home,” he said.
Chapter Seventeen
When Kara opened her eyes, they were standing on her bedroom balcony in the Gaslamp. The sun was just beginning to go down in San Diego, and the sky was a cloudless gold over the water. Gavin tested his wings, sighing in relief when his silver feathers released in a great arc across his back.
