My Kind Of Country: The Complete Series

by Michelle Thomas

  “If you only knew how beautiful you—”

  He was quickly cut off as Katie pushed him back, struggling to sit up. For a moment, he worried he’d gone too far too soon, and she was retreating from him, but something much stronger than worry filled him as he watched her pull the t-shirt—his t-shirt—over her head, revealing her olive skin and simple black bra with pink stitching. His gaze passed over the tan lines along her shoulders and chest—lines he’d thought about seeing beyond many times before—and he exhaled a steadying breath. “Katie, you are—”

  She leaned forward and kissed him again, her hands outlining the edge of his belt before pulling him back on top of her by his belt buckle. Chad fell forward onto one hand again, trailing his other gently across the band of her bra. He broke the kiss, but made no movement to back away.

  “Katie, if we do this—”

  She shushed him, her eyes locking with his as her fingers fumbled blindly to undo his belt. “It’s okay.”

  “We can’t go back—”

  She brought a hand up between them and pressed her finger gently against his lips. “There is no consequence to me loving you. And if there is, to hell with whatever it is.” She removed her finger slowly from his mouth, replacing it with a sultry kiss.

  He kissed her back, letting his desire fuel him, and he pulled her legs around his hips, silently instructing her to hold on to him. Effortlessly, he lifted her from the couch, her limbs clutched around him. At the doorway to the bedroom, he stopped, pushing her up against the doorjamb to kiss her again, more feverishly, a swell of satisfaction rising in him at the sound of her muted whimpers as he kissed down her neck, his tongue dipping into the hollow at the base of her throat.

  “Chad...”

  Her voice was riddled with hunger and need. There was no question in her statement, just his name on her tongue and a longing to have him. To hell with the consequences, indeed, was his last practical thought before he pushed away from the doorway and carried her into the bedroom, kicking the door closed unceremoniously behind him.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  KATIE

  The bedroom was still shrouded in grays with darkened corners when Katie reluctantly opened her eyes. Bright light peeked out from the sides of the window blinds, drawn down as far as they would go to block out the day. She didn’t remember Chad pulling them closed last night.

  He must keep them closed all the time, she thought.

  Though there were no memories of him drawing the blinds, she recalled many other things he’d said and done within the darkness of the room the night before, and heat flushed high in her cheeks as the vivid mental images flashed like snapshots in her mind. Her head felt fuzzy, thick with sleep deprivation, but those images still managed to seep through to her consciousness.

  A soft groan escaped her lips as she attempted to roll her tired body onto her side. A deep inhale of breath sounded loudly beside her in the dimness, and Chad’s hand snaked under the covers across her stomach, pulling her back against him.

  “You’re not running already, are you?” His voice was deep and sleepy, barely on the edge of wakefulness. His breath was warm against the nape of her neck, and Katie relaxed back into him.

  “Running? What makes you think I’m running?” She turned over to face him, his squinting eyes and tousled hair visible in the dim lighting.

  Chad breathed deeply again, and the sound of rustling covers sounded loud in the silence. “I’ve laid here most of the night wondering if you would wake up this morning and change your mind again.”

  Katie pulled on the comforter, tucking it under her arm to cover her bare skin. She nuzzled in closer, and the feeling of his fingers on her hip caused her to sigh. “Only most of the night?” She bit back her amusement.

  “Yeah, the rest of the night was spent...well...I didn’t dream it, right?”

  She chuckled, brushing her hair from her face. “It wasn’t a dream, I can assure you of that. It did kind of seem like it, though. To me, anyway.”

  His smug grin of pride shone in the muted light. “So, it wasn’t a dream, and I didn’t wake up to find you gone—so far, so good.”

  “You have low expectations of me, I see.”

  Chad reached around behind her and pulled her closer against him, kissing her forehead softly. “Not at all.” His eyes locked on hers. “But I need to know if you regret it. Even a little bit.”

  His sudden serious tone caught her off guard. He obviously wasn’t as sleepy as she’d initially thought. “I don’t. Not even a little bit.” The corner of her mouth twitched. “The only regret I have is not letting myself love you sooner.”

  He leaned forward and kissed her lips softly, a featherlight caress. “Don’t have regrets, Katie,” he whispered. “We’ve got all the time in the world to make up for the time we lost.” He slid his arm under her pillow, and she tucked her head into the crook of his arm, taking in his scent—a woodsy cologne tainted with hints of the love they’d made the night before.

  “I want you to sing that song to me. The one you wrote about me.”

  A glimmer of mischief glinted in Chad’s eyes, and he smiled. “Someday.” His gaze met hers. “But today is not that day.”

  She giggled, knowing full well he would refuse. “You seem to have an answer for everything, Mr. Kirkwood,” she sighed. “Any insight into what I should tell Mason, then? He’s the one I’m worried about in all this.”

  He brought his hand up and stroked the side of her face with his fingertips, idly pushing a stray strand of hair behind her ears. “Mason is a kid, Katie, but I think he understands more than you think he does. It’s not like he can’t see that you and Jay aren’t happy with each other. He’s wise beyond his years and observant, almost to a fault. Hell, if you asked him, I wouldn’t doubt he’d tell you to walk away from Jay.” He paused, rethinking his choice of words. “Well, maybe not, but I think he would rather you both be happy than have to live the way you are now. My opinion in all this is biased, I know that. But I just think it would be better for all involved, even if I wasn’t in the picture.”

  She nodded in understanding against his shoulder, closing her eyes as she soaked in the caress of his fingers in her hair. “But you are in the picture, and like you said last night, there are consequences to every decision. It’s not like I can just walk away from Jay and start dating you. He is Mason’s father, and Jay is going to want him to be here. I don’t even have a place in Nashville, and I have the farm to look after, and there’s—”

  “Whoa, Katie. Slow down, okay?” He tilted her chin to face him, and he could feel her chest beginning to heave as her anxiousness converted to fear with all the questions and uncertainties that remained in the wake of last night’s decision. “I’m going to ask you again. Do you regret it?”

  Her bottom lip quivered slightly, but Katie shook her head. “I don’t.”

  “Okay, then we will work it out.” He brushed his hand against her cheek again, and she curled herself around him, her panic subsided for the time being.

  “There’s just so much to think about.”

  He nodded against the top of her head. “There is, but it’s not right—or healthy, for that matter—to stay with someone just because it’s easier.”

  She exhaled loudly, the tension easing in her shoulders and neck. “I don’t even know what to do next, to be honest.”

  He traced a line with his fingertip down her arm, and Katie wondered if she would ever get used to having him with her, so close to her, so intimately. Her head rested comfortably on his arm. “Well, if you could do anything—without having to think about anyone else’s wellbeing, I mean—what would you want to do?”

  The answer passed her lips before she even had time to think about it. “I’d go back to being a nurse. I was good at my job, and I liked it.”

  Chad held his hand over his heart and feigned shock. “Wow, I just can’t believe you didn’t say you wanted to run the farm fulltime.”

  Katie reare
d her head back and looked at his mocking expression skeptically. “What? You didn’t know me when I was a nurse. And, well, farming would not be my first choice.”

  “Again, what a shocker.” He laughed, planting a kiss on her temple in apology. “I’m sorry, but a blind person would be able to tell that you never truly loved working at the farm. You were good at it, yes, and I know you have your reasons, but your heart just wasn’t in it, even if you wanted it to be. You can’t force something like that.”

  “I never realized it was that obvious.”

  “Your body language spoke volumes. I’ve watched you enough to learn what it all meant.”

  “You sound like a stalker,” she smirked.

  He shrugged it off. “Whatever it takes.” He was still grinning when his mouth landed on hers.

  They were both breathless when Katie pulled away. “I need coffee.” She kissed his forehead before sliding away from him and swinging her legs off the edge of the bed. She held the covers tightly to her body.

  “Some things will never change. I’ll make some, Katie. You can stay here if you’d like.” Chad sat up, dragging his legs out over his side of the bed, and she stole a glance behind her to admire him, the muscles in his back highlighted by the shadows of the room. She turned away in attempt to squelch the wave of wanting that bubbled to the surface again.

  “If we’re going to talk about serious topics, I need to make sure you make the coffee good and strong.” She pulled on her bra and panties, turning to find Chad watching her, a hungry glint in his eye. A knowing blush rose high into her face and she turned away again, her eyes locked on the floor in search of her clothes.

  “You’re going to monitor me while I make coffee. What are you, the caffeine police?” His voice was closer than expected, and she turned abruptly to face his bare chest. She glanced up, prepared to jokingly defy him. Instead, he ducked his head toward her ear and whispered, “Your shirt is on the living room floor, in case you forgot how it got there.”

  Blushing fifteen shades of crimson, she watched in silence as he, his bare torso, and his smug expression slipped past her, his hand brushing her abdomen affectionately as he went, and he disappeared out the bedroom door, leaving it open behind him.

  Instead of having to pass Chad’s cognizant gaze to get the t-shirt from the living room floor, she chose to duck into the bathroom attached to his bedroom and retrieve her own shirt instead, still hanging on one of the hooks behind the door where she’d left it after her shower the night before.

  She stole a few moments to splash water on her face and run her fingers through her hair, staring at her own reflection in distaste. Lack of sleep had never looked good on her, and her puffy eyes and sallow complexion confirmed it. She thought about sifting through the drawers and cupboards in the vanity to search for mouthwash, but decided against it in the end. It would just taint the delectable taste of her coffee.

  She emerged from the bathroom to find Chad puttering around the kitchen, two matching mugs already set out with spoons, cream, and sugar beside them on the counter. He must have noticed her out of the corner of his eye because he snapped his fingers and quickly pulled the coffee pot from its base, only partially full, and began to fill one of the mugs for her.

  “You could’ve waited until it was finished brewing, you know.” She smiled graciously as she took the mug from him.

  “True, but being the coffee connoisseur that you are, I wouldn’t want you to have to wait for it and, besides, there’s a thirty-second timer on that machine for just such an occasion.” He offered her a playful wink and pushed the coffee pot back into place. The steady stream of brewed coffee dripped into it, picking up where it’d left off in the brewing process. “The coffee is stronger that way, anyway. You know, so we can discuss serious matters.”

  “Are you making fun of me?” She pressed her lips into a tight line, but Chad just winked again.

  “You just drink up. You’ll be more receptive to my charm once the caffeine hits your bloodstream.”

  Her eyes widened, and she choked mid swallow, laughter bubbling unexpectedly. “Oh, charm. Is that what it is?”

  Chad rounded the corner of the counter and hugged her close to him. “I don’t know, what is it, Katie?”

  She held the mug out away from her so as not to spill it, looking up to meet his eyes. A million sarcastic, laughable answers came to her, but instead she chose the truth. “You can call it what you want. I call it love.”

  She watched his eyes twinkle, making her break out in an even bigger grin.

  “Is that so?” He lowered his face to hers and kissed her. “I just want you to know,” he said, brushing his thumb across her bottom lip. “I understand that Mason is your number one priority, and I’m okay with that. He should be. But, I also want you to know that I won’t let him get hurt in all this. He’s a child, not a pawn. No matter what, we’ll do what’s best for him, okay? I won’t let him get hurt, and I mean that.”

  Katie stared at him in awe. After everything she’d put him through, everything they’d needlessly gone through, he still understood. Chad Kirkwood was the man she was supposed to be with, the one she was meant to build a life with.

  This was where she was supposed to be. In his arms. She could see that now.

  “Yeah, I would definitely call this love,” she whispered, kissing him again.

  ***

  Even after her long talk with Chad over coffee and breakfast—and his continuous insistence that everything would sort itself out as long as she followed her intuition—Katie still trembled terribly as she drove toward Jay’s apartment.

  She’d finally made a decision for herself, and that decision was Chad Kirkwood. Unfortunately, even as exciting and appealing as that decision was for her, there were still the consequences of that decision to deal with. She could no longer live a lie. She knew things would never work out with Jay, and selfishly, she hoped that she was right in her belief that, deep down, he was fed up with it, too. At least, that way, she wouldn’t feel like she was the sole reason they’d finally parted ways.

  She would talk to Jay first, hopefully calmly and maturely like she rehearsed in her head, and then they’d both sit down and speak with Mason. She prayed Chad was right, that her son would welcome the permanent split as a better result than living as they had for the last few months. At the very least, as long as he understood that she and Jay were not giving up on being his parents, they could build on that. She’d rehearsed some of the things she wanted to say to him while in the car, too, but doubted she would remember what those wise words were when the time came.

  Katie took one last glance in the overhead mirror, wishing that her reflection didn’t reflect the long, sleep-lacking night she’d truly had. She didn’t regret any of it, but she sure wished she wasn’t wearing such an obvious appearance that announced it. Reluctantly, she headed for the building. There was no use putting off the inevitable.

  She turned the key in the lock slowly, somehow not wanting to announce her re-entry any louder than she had to. The door creaked open and she stepped inside, half expecting to see her luggage bags packed and by the door. Nothing was sitting there, however. At least, nothing blatantly obvious to announce anyone’s knowledge of her recent actions.

  She closed the door behind her, letting out a slow exhale. The silence sank in around her, and she tried to calm her jittery nerves and clear her mind.

  When she turned around again and Jay was standing there at the end of the short hallway, she jumped at the sight of him, her hand immediately covering her heart, beating wildly in her chest.

  “Christ, Jay! You scared me.”

  “If you’re going to come in, then come in. Stop trying to stay quiet.” He turned around and disappeared back around the corner. “There’s only you and I here, anyway.”

  She slipped off her shoes and followed him, leaving her purse by the door. “Where’s Mason? You said—”

  “I know what I said, Katie. He’s fine. H
e’s just at Julia’s for a little bit.” Jay held his hands up, scowling. “Don’t worry, he’s only been there for about an hour. I was with him the entire evening and night while you were...” He made a dismissive gesture with his hand and turned away from her again. By the looks of the dining room table, he’d been camped out there a while, his half-filled coffee cup plunked down beside a pile of newspapers, his cellphone, and a plate with the crusts of his leftover toast.

  Katie crossed her arms self-consciously in front of her. “About last night. If Mason isn’t here, we need to talk about—”

  “Oh, Katie, you have no idea.” He leaned across the table and pulled one of the newspapers from the middle of the pile. She watched in confusion as he flipped through a few of the pages and then splayed the paper out on the table, stepping away from it. He gestured her to take a look, his face distorted in anger and disappointment.

  She took a few steps toward the table. What stared back at her on the page both appalled and frightened her, and she could feel the blood draining from her face as she took in the article and accompanying picture. The full-color photo on the front page of the entertainment section of the newspaper depicted Chad and Katie in what looked very much like a lovers’ embrace, just the right angle to make it look as though they had no concept of the people passing by them and were making out like a couple of teenagers.

  While she knew that was far from the case, the photograph and the thousand words it was worth very clearly made it look like they couldn’t keep their hands off each other just outside his apartment door. If the picture wasn’t enough, the article spelled it out with it’s headline “Ashton’s Mystery Woman” printed in bold font above an article that cited a source close to the couple admitting the woman in question and Chad Ashton were all over each other, and that she had gone upstairs to his apartment that night, not to be seen again before the newspaper was printed.