by Cindy Wilder
“I'll see you in the morning,” I said. “I can't wait to go shopping.”
“I wanted to talk to you some more,” my dad said.
“Tomorrow,” I said. “I need to check something in my room. I love you.”
I quickly hugged my dad and took off up the stairs. My door shut behind me, and I quickly locked it. I grabbed my phone and checked my messages.
Brad: Call me if you want to talk. I'll see you Saturday. I wish I knew what was going on. How did everything change so fast? I'll miss you.
That was from before he left. There was nothing from him after that. I fell onto my bed and closed my eyes. When I couldn't fall asleep, I spent the entire night thinking about how I was going to tell him. Maybe I should just cut off all communication with him, I thought. Then he wouldn't know and their family would be okay. I could stay at the apartment until school started. It would give me plenty of time to figure out what I was going to do in the fall. Would I try to find a better job, switch schools, or just go back and avoid Brad? My feelings were so strong for him. The thought of never being with him again was devastating. I felt like I couldn't breathe. Why did my dad have to pick his mom? Out of all the people in the area, why did he have to find her? I cried so hard. All I could think about was not being with him. He would move on to be with someone else. The thought of another woman touching him only made me cry harder. I was so tired of thinking of everyone else. What about me, I thought?
My alarm squealed through my room. It sounded louder than ever before. I turned it off and pulled the pillow over my head. I didn't get out of bed until I knew Brayden would be gone. When I moved to open my door, I found a note on the ground.
Tara,
Don't think you can avoid me forever. I've had enough. You can't run. I'll see you at the wedding.
Brayden
I felt like I was going to be sick. Why did he insist on torturing me? Didn't he realize I was doing enough of that myself? What the hell was wrong with him, I wondered? I couldn't wait to get away from the entire situation. I was seriously counting the hours. In forty-eight hours I would be done. No matter if I told Brad or not, I would be free of the situation at that time. I just had to put on a happy face, get through two more days, and figure out what I was going to do.
Jen was ready to leave with a huge smile on her face. She was so happy. Why couldn't I feel like that, I thought? We got into her car and began our day.
We went to five stores. Once we had everything she wanted, we headed home. I had a nice time with her and hoped I wasn't a total bitch. It wasn't her fault. None of it was. She was very nice to me and treated me great. I felt bad for distancing myself.
On the way back to the house, my phone rang. I grabbed it excitedly thinking it might be Brad, but it was the dentist office I interviewed at. When I said hello, my nerves were on edge. Was it going to be good or bad news, I wondered? The woman offered me the job, and I let out a huge breath. She let me know that I could start Monday morning. I was so excited and couldn't contain it. As soon as I hung up the phone, I rambled on to Jen. She seemed just as happy as I did. It was one more thing to keep my mind off of the twins.
We carried everything into the house and began making the food for the following day. Time flew by and I honestly didn't have a moment to think. It was the first break for my mind in days. My dad showed up with pizza for dinner. I think Jen was just as excited as me. By the time we went to bed, we were both exhausted.
I checked my phone, but there was nothing from Brad. It took all I had to get my ass out of bed the next morning. It was my dad's wedding day. I was feeling every emotion possible. Part of me was happy for him, and part of me didn't want to give him away to her. He was my hero. I'd had him to myself for so long.
Jen needed help with some things, and I told her I would be there early to help her. As soon as I walked into the kitchen, she wrapped me in her arms.
“I hope everything's okay,” she said. “You look like you've been crying.”
“It's your wedding day,” I said. “Everything's fine. I had a hard time falling asleep, but I'm great.”
“I can't wait for all of us to be a family,” she said.
I smiled at her and laughed.
“We need to get this food finished, so you can get ready to get hitched,” I said.
We moved around the kitchen to get everything together. If I was working, I didn't have time to think about things. I still hadn't decided if I was going to tell Brad or just walk away from him. It was a huge decision. If I didn't tell him, I would lose him, and Brayden would feel like he got back at Brad. Maybe they could move on and mend their relationship. If I told him what happened, I still wouldn't have him but it could put a huge strain on his relationship with his brother.
“You ready to get dressed?” Jen asked, pulling me from my messed up thoughts.
I nodded and smiled.
“I'll see you back down here in a bit. Time for me to go get pretty,” she said.
“You're pretty no matter what you have on,” I said. “I'll see you in a few.”
I turned away and looked at the clock. It was noon. I had about twenty-one hours to figure things out, no matter what I decided was happening Sunday morning. The wedding was in one hour. I ran up the stairs and opened my door. I grabbed my clothes and hurried to the bathroom to shower. When I was dressed and ready, I headed back to my room. I threw the door closed behind me and threw my dirty clothes on the floor. My hair was curled and makeup was on. I picked a pretty, pink dress to wear for the day. As I turned to give myself one last look in the mirror, I saw something on my bed. It was another note. When I opened it, my mouth dropped open. He just couldn't let them have their day in peace.
Tara,
I hope you enjoy the wedding today, sis. It's time you stop avoiding me. I've been patient enough. Meet me out back behind the shed at ten o'clock tonight. All I've been able to think about is you on your knees with my cock in your mouth. If you're not there, you're man will learn that his woman's not so perfect after all. Have a good day!
Brayden
My head fell into my hands as the note drifted to the floor. I had no idea how I was going to get through the day without breaking down.
One Step at a Time #4
I took three deep breaths in and out, allowing myself to feel my lungs fill with air before releasing it each time. It was time for the wedding, and I wasn't going to be late. I reached down and snatched the letter from where it fell on my carpet. As I scanned it again, I tried not to let the anger fill me. I shoved it into my dresser and turned back to look in the mirror. Stay calm, I thought. That fucker wasn't getting the best of me. I was going to watch my father marry his new love. They were both amazing and deserved to find happiness.
When I walked down the steps and went to find Jen, I bumped into a wall of muscle. I pulled back and noticed it wasn't either of the twins but someone who looked much like them. He had dark brown, longer hair and beautiful chocolate eyes. I watched Jen run up and wrap her arms around him. When she pulled away, there were tears in her eyes. Maybe he was just a relative. It had to be Billy. I was just shocked at the resemblance between him and the other two.
“Tara,” she squeaked out. “Come here.”
I walked over to them slowly.
“You look beautiful,” I said, as I looked her over.
She had on a long cream dress that flowed from her body. Her hair was up and her makeup was light. She looked absolutely perfect.
“This is Billy,” she said, full of excitement.
“It's nice to meet you,” I said. “I've heard so much about you.”
“Don't believe a word Brayden says and only half of what Brad says,” he joked.
“It was all good things. Your mom and Brad are the ones that told me. I'm Tara.”
“You're Tim's daughter,” he said.
“I am,” I said. “Don't believe a word any of them tell you.”
All three of us laughed.
&nb
sp; “I would never say a bad word about you,” Jen said.
“It's not you I'm worried about,” I said with a sigh.
Billy looked at me with his head tilted. I saw a look of concern cross his face for just a moment before the front door opened. In walked Brad looking so incredibly sexy. He had on a white dress shirt with the top buttons open, a pink tie that dangled from his neck, black suit pants that looked like they were made just for him, and he was holding his suit jacket over his shoulder. I heard the gasp escape me before I could stop it. The only way I knew it was Brad was because the asshole had already walked out the back door. I noticed Billy look over as I gasped, so I quickly cleared my throat to try and cover it. Billy stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Brad. I'm not sure why, but it was an emotional moment. I could feel the warmth between the two brothers. They definitely had a close connection.
“It's so damn good to see you,” Brad said. “I thought you weren't coming. You have no idea how happy I am that you did. I love you, man.”
The guys talked for a few minutes while I stood talking to Jen. I couldn't take my eyes off of Brad. Seeing him standing there, unsure of how I was going to handle the day, brought tears to my eyes. Jen pulled me into her arms.
“You okay?” she asked.
I nodded into her shoulder. At the same time, I could feel Brad's eyes on me.
“I'm just happy for you and dad,” I said, trying to cover up the mess that was me.
My dad walked up behind Jen and hugged her.
“Come on, baby,” he said. “It's time to do this. Are you sure you're ready to be with me forever? It's your last chance to run.”
I knew he was joking. There was no way either of them were running. He had found that undeniable love twice in his life. I had to wonder if I hadn't screwed up my only chance at ever finding that kind of love.
Jen took my dad's hand and walked with him. I dried my eyes with the back of my hand and moved to follow them. A hand came out of nowhere and pulled me back.
“Are you okay?”
I didn't move to turn around when he asked me. There was no way I wanted to look Brad in the eyes. I couldn't do it.
“No,” I said, and pulled out of his reach as I walked away from him.
“Tara,” I heard just before I walked out the door into the yard.
There were chairs on both sides with a runner in the middle. At the front, we had flowers and balloons. I was surprised and proud of what we had accomplished spending so little money. My dad stood at the front looking handsome. His hair was beginning to gray slightly, and he was looking a bit older. I was so proud of everything he had done in his life. He was an amazing husband to my mom. When she passed, he was the best father I could have ever hoped for. Seeing him in love again was really special. He had a huge smile on his face, and I knew he was going to make Jen very happy. From what I had heard about her ex, she deserved every bit of happiness he was going to give her. Brad stepped up next to me, and I took his arm. I could feel my entire body shaking.
“Everything's going to be okay,” he whispered.
“No,” I whispered back. “It's not.”
I took a step forward and he followed. As I walked toward my dad, I watched the excitement flow from him. He didn't realize how lucky he was. Brad squeezed my hand and took his place next to my dad, as I took my place on the other side. Jen looked beautiful as she came down the aisle. Their eyes connected and I could see so much love between them.
The wedding was short, and I really can't tell you anything about it. I was a ball of nerves. Every moment that passed was a minute closer to the scariest moment in my life. I didn't know what I was going to do. He wasn't getting close to me, but I wasn't sure how he was going to react. I could feel him watching me the entire day. Brad was watching me just as closely. I tried not to look at Brad. He looked so gorgeous. I wanted to wrap myself in his arms and be safe. He always kept me safe and took away my fears. It was where I belonged. We belonged together. How could one man destroy all of that?
Everyone enjoyed the party. The food was perfect. I was happy to see there was enough for everyone. My dad made a point of telling each person how proud he was of me for doing so well at school and for getting a job. Brad was sitting two people away when my dad went on and on about it. He looked up at me with a questioning look. I shrugged and half smiled at him. He smiled back. I looked away and back to my dad and the people he was talking to. I could see Brayden watching me the entire time. He gave me the creeps.
I still hadn't made up my mind about what to do. If I told Brad and he went after his brother, my dad and Jen would find out what happened. I was sure Brad would be done with me, and it hurt so badly. I couldn't imagine how my dad and Jen would feel about me and what it would do to their relationships with the twins. I wasn't even sure what it would do to their marriage. If I didn't tell him and just walked away, he would wonder what happened. Then his brother would still be on a mission to hurt him. My decision had the potential to hurt so many people.
As soon as I knew nobody would be looking for me, I took off for my room. It was getting late, and I was sure people would start slowly leaving the party. When I dropped down onto my bed, I felt the tears running down my cheeks. Part of me was still shocked that my dad was married. Everything was happening so fast. I didn't know what to do. My job was going to be right by the apartment. It would be nothing for me to get to work. If I stayed at the house, I'd have to take my dad to work and use his car every day. With everything that was happening with the twins, I knew it would be better if I wasn't around. Any way it went, I would need to be away from at least one of them. There would be no way I could be around Brayden after telling Brad.
When I opened my eyes, I felt my phone buzz beneath me. I must have rolled on it after falling asleep. When I looked up at the clock, I instantly felt sick. It was already after nine. I clicked it on to check my message.
Brad: Where are you?
Me: In my room. I fell asleep.
Brad: Everyone left. Your dad was looking for you. I wanted you to talk to Billy. Why don't you come downstairs?
Me: I'll be down in a few.
Brad: Are you okay? You know how much I care about you, Tara. Why are you so mad I left the other night? I thought you would understand. We're telling them about us tomorrow.
Me: You left. You have no idea what I've been going through since I came here. If I could go back, I never would have come home.
Brad: Don't say that. My mom didn't tell me either. It's not like you were the only one surprised by it. Why do you act like it's worse for you?
Me: I was an only child. It was me and my dad. I came home to find out my home wasn't mine anymore and that I was gaining three brothers and their mother. You're still in the same house with the same asshole for a brother. I don't think I can do any of this. I care about you more than you will ever know. I want you to know that. You have no idea the hell I've gone through since coming here. Please don't think that my feelings for you have changed. You are the most amazing man I know. I appreciate every single thing you have done for me with school and personally.
Brad: What the hell is going on, Tara? I thought we were doing great when we left school. Something's different. Talk to me. You didn't even tell me you got a job.
Me: You weren't here to tell. I'm sorry for everything you've had to go through for me.
Brad: I couldn't be here and listen to him treat you like crap without saying anything. I haven't went through anything with you. I helped you study. What else are you talking about?
Me: I'll be down in a minute.
Brad: You are talking to me, Tara.
Me: Why can't everyone just back off for a minute? Why can't I just think about me for a change?
Brad: What are you talking about?
Me: Nothing. I'll be there in a few.
I turned my phone off and looked over at the clock. Time was spinning so fast, and I felt like I couldn't breathe. When I looked out my windo
w, everything was dark and peaceful. Was he already out there, I wondered? Was he just waiting to make my life hell?
By the time I got down stairs and walked into the living room, it was nine-thirty. Billy was sitting on the couch. I sat across from him and waited for him to say something. Where the hell was Brad, I wondered? Every part of my body was tense, and I felt like I was going to snap.
“Where's Brad?” I asked.
“He said he was going upstairs and would be right back,” he said.
“You two are close, aren't you?” I asked.
“Yes,” he said. “We kind of bonded when some stuff was going on with our dad. I worried about him. We don't see each other much, but I talk to him on the phone. I don't get along very well with his brother, and certain things around here make me think of my dad. I try to stay away. If my mom wants to see me, she comes to my place. I felt bad about missing today, and Brad convinced me to come.”
I nodded.
“How do you know I'm close to Brad?” he asked. “I thought you just met last weekend?”
“He said something earlier in the week that made me think about it,” I answered.
He looked at me and smiled.
“What?” I snapped.
“Testy,” he joked.
Billy leaned in closer to me.
“You didn't just meet him last weekend,” he whispered.
“Why would you say that?” I asked.
“I've never seen him look at someone that way he looked at you this morning when he walked in. He continued to watch you all day long. You're her,” he said.
“Who exactly?” I asked.
I didn't have the time or patience for riddles. Billy didn't realize that I was about to walk out into the craziest moment of my life. Having sex with Brayden was the worst moment, but I didn't know it at the time. I knew what I was getting ready to walk into. I had both notes in my pocket and was ready to take him on.
“You're that girl from school. You're his biology partner, aren't you?” he asked.
“Look,” I snapped. “I am begging you not to say a word to anyone about this, not even to him. You have no idea the shock I had when I found out my father was marrying his mother. When I got here, something happened and everything began going to shit. I care about him more than you will ever know. I've never felt the way I feel about him before. I would never do anything to hurt him. He's going to find something out tomorrow morning. I know you two are close. Please be there for him. I'm not sure how he's going to react. I didn't do it on purpose. I was tricked. Don't say anything to our parents about us. Please, don't say anything to Brad until I leave tomorrow.”
