Pregnant Nurse, New-Found Family

by Lynne Marshall

  Another gust of wind hit her solidly in the face as she walked toward the clinic building. She pulled her hair back from her eyes, remembering how so many of the ragweed patients had been reacting to their weed shots today. It made sense, with heavy pollen blowing in from the nearby hills. Even though she’d written Gavin out of her life, she couldn’t keep him out of her mind for more than minutes at a time.

  She’d been using the stairs at work, telling herself the exercise was a good thing, but all the while she knew she had the ulterior motive of avoiding Gavin in the elevators.

  Two flights up, she heard a door open on the landing above. She turned the corner and glanced up in time to see Gavin heading down.

  Oh, God. Her knees wobbled. Had he taken the stairs to avoid her, too?

  Her hand trembled on the railing and her mind went fuzzy.

  He stopped in his tracks, masking a guarded expression, making it impossible to read him. He stared into her eyes—waiting.

  Beth had promised herself that the next time she saw him she’d break things off, and had purposely put it off. Well, here he was.

  She thought her heart might explode.

  Keep it casual. Don’t burn any more bridges. He’ll need to be a part of the babies’ lives whether we’re together or not.

  “Hi,” she said.

  He nodded, with a cautious expression. “Hi.”

  “Just get your shots?” Her voice wavered in a sorry attempt to sound nonchalant.

  He scratched one arm with a vengeance. “Yeah. This one itches like a bee sting.”

  “I bet it’s the weed mix. You shouldn’t scratch it. It will just make it worse.”

  He clenched his jaw.

  Enough with the small talk. If life had taught her

  “How was the fishing trip?”

  “Really good. There are a few things I’d like to talk to you about, but the hospital stairwell isn’t the right place,” he said.

  Already winded from the steps, knowing what she had to do took the rest of her breath away.

  “So, can I see you tonight? Patrick has tai kwon do.”

  “I think it’s best if we step back for a while, Gavin. There’s just too much going on for both of us.”

  His brow furrowed. “But we’re just getting to know each other—”

  “All the more reason to stop seeing each other now. Why take it any further? Look, we’ve both got so much baggage—it can’t be good for Patrick, or the babies.”

  “I don’t believe this.”

  “I’m sorry. I’m finding it hard to believe, too.” She glanced at her watch and gave him an apologetic glance. “I’m already late for work.”

  There was one last thing she wanted to do. On instinct, she grabbed his face and kissed him goodbye. Her heart hurt so much she couldn’t tell if she’d kissed him too intimately or not, but it was their last kiss and it took all she had not to cry.

  He embraced her with strong arms, held her close and kissed her back as if he was trying to change her mind.

  But they were at work and this was a public stairwell.

  She pulled back. He resisted letting her go, so she gently pushed and gingerly twisted from his grasp.

  “I’m sorry,” she said, as she raced up the last three stairs to the door.

  *

  It had taken Beth most of the last hour to recover. While preoccupied with transferring orders to a chart, the clinic phone rang. It was Jillian.

  “You’ll never guess what’s going on down here. Gavin just got admitted to the ER in full anaphylaxis.”

  Her heart dropped to the floor, along with the phone receiver. Her stomach went queasy and tears threatened her, making her eyes sting. She raced out the door and called over her shoulder to the other nurse, “Please take over. I’ve got to go!”

  Oh, God. The allergy shots had been too much for him. She swiped at her tears. Blood made a quick exodus from her head as her nurse’s training forced its way into her brain—the reaction link between ragweed and cantaloupe sensitivity. The kiss!

  When she reached the emergency department, she remembered she didn’t know the entry code. Through the window, the room bustled with activity, personnel rushing back and forth. Carmen noticed her, looking frazzled and beyond concerned.

  She met Beth at the door. “Listen, things are crazy right now. As soon as I know anything, I’ll fill you in. He’s OK. But really messed up.” She didn’t invite Beth in.

  The ER door closed and she stood stunned for several more guilt-ridden seconds. Between his festering weed shots and her Tuscan cantaloupe kiss, she could have pushed him over the edge to anaphylaxis with oral-allergy syndrome. Oh, God.

  As if she were a zombie, she returned to her department and opened the double doors to find Dr Mehta striding

  Beth nodded, knowing exactly where the doctor was going, wondering if she’d almost killed the man she loved. She silently prayed that Gavin would survive.

  Unable to face clinic patients right then, she went to the department chartroom where she paced, worried, and prayed more. She found Gavin’s chart and looked up his RAST blood tests. There it was, cantaloupe, as positive as any reaction could get. She tamped down the panic and anxiety that threatened to overtake her, and forced herself to keep positive thoughts. He’ll be OK. He’ll be OK. He’s in good hands. They caught it soon enough. Oh, God, did they catch the reaction soon enough? Personal experience warned her that the anaphylactic reaction could go either way, and timing was the key. Thank God he’d been on his way back to the ER after she’d kissed him.

  Once Bupinder returned from the ED, Beth went to her office. She stood just outside the door and waited until the doctor noticed her. Dr Mehta lifted large, nearly black eyes and, reading the worry on Beth’s face, invited her in.

  Beth entered the cluttered office and sat on the edge of the chair across from the desk. She cleared her throat. “How is Gavin?”

  “He is doing as well as can be expected for such an unfortunate incident.” She placed one hand on the other and put both on top of her paperwork. “If he’d had his EpiPen with him, as was supposed to, he might have avoided this horrid reaction.” Bupinder questioned Beth with a confused look. “What is it with these men? They don’t think they can die?” She gave a reassuring smile. “But he

  The doctor tried to reassure her, but it only forced the knife of guilt deeper into Beth’s side.

  “One more question?”

  “Of course.”

  “Theoretically speaking,” Beth said, “could someone go into anaphylaxis from kissing? Um, that is, if one person had recently eaten something that the other was severely allergic to?”

  “Yes. It is possible. Microscopic food particles can be passed from mouth to mouth through the saliva, setting off an abnormal release of histamine in the tissues of the allergic person.”

  “As though the person had eaten the food himself?” Beth closed her eyes and felt tears sneak past her lids. “I mean, herself?” Hell, she’d almost killed him!

  “Gavin has been remiss about taking antihistamines before the injections and carrying an EpiPen. I just interviewed him. Remember? This incident didn’t have to happen at all. But it is no one’s fault, OK?” Knowing eyes glanced across the desk.

  “OK,” Beth replied, dying to find him and apologize.

  Beth called the ER at 4:15 p.m. and Carmen asked her to come down.

  Practically running the whole way, she abruptly slowed and approached Gavin’s room in the ER with trepidation. Carmen intercepted her by rushing up to her, a worried look in her eyes. She touched Beth’s arm with icy fingers. “Patrick’s gone missing.”

  A jolt of shock stopped Beth in her tracks. “What?”

  “The carpool mother, June, dropped him off at home like she always does. I called and told Patrick his daddy had a bad allergy attack and he’d have to stay overnight in the hospital. I told him I’d be over to pick him up as soon as I could get there and to wait for the babysitter.” Ca
rmen stared intently into Beth’s eyes, and without thinking Beth reached for her hands and held them tightly. “Lauren, the high-school girl from next door, always comes over at four to help him with his homework and watch him until Gav gets home from work. She just called to say Patrick isn’t home.”

  “Oh, my God! I’ll go look for him.”

  Carmen reached in her pocket and tossed Beth something. “Here are the house keys.” Strain furrowed her brow. “I wish I could go with you.”

  “Don’t worry. I’ll find him. Just take good care of Gavin.”

  Carmen loved Gavin like a kid brother and Patrick as if he were her own nephew. She glanced at Beth. Their eyes met and Beth could swear she saw a glimmer of respect in Carmen’s intense brown stare. Beth flew out of the emergency department, feeling every second of the clock was her enemy keeping her from finding Patrick.

  She thought of every possibility of where the boy might be on the drive to Gavin’s house. She called the babysitter and asked her to call all of his closest and new friends. Lauren, the sitter, met her at the curb, saying no one knew where he was. They optimistically barreled through the front door, expecting to find Patrick, the whole thing having been a misunderstanding or a boyish joke.

  He’d obviously come home, just like the carpool mom

  Beth and Lauren stormed into his bedroom. He was nowhere to be found. He’d changed out of his school clothes and had left them on his bed. His backpack was gone. The closet door was half-open.

  Beth peeked inside. The hamsters weren’t in their cages, and the plastic travel ball was missing. A thought popped into her mind. “Is there a pet store anywhere nearby?”

  “Yeah. Marvin’s Menagerie is about two blocks away.”

  “Close enough to walk to?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Stay here. I’m going to check it out.”

  Beth drove fast but carefully to the store and parked out front at five minutes to five, then rushed through the door. She entered to hear the old man behind the counter say, “We’re closing in a few minutes.”

  Long aisles of shelves stacked with cages lined the walls. Squawks and screeches interrupted her thoughts. Animal smells overcame the stench of harsh cleaning agents.

  “Have you seen a little boy with brown hair, about this high?” She used her hand to indicate Patrick’s height.

  “Beth!” Patrick’s voice came from further back in the store.

  She rushed to him and they hugged. “Why didn’t you tell anyone where you’d gone?”

  Patrick had changed into his purple and gold Lakers jersey—his courage shirt. He stood next to a cage where Muffy and Puff were harbored. “I needed to say goodbye.”

  The silver-haired store clerk looked at Beth. “The boy

  Tears brimmed in her eyes as she realized the sacrifice the boy was about to make for his father. Her heart stung with the knowledge that Patrick thought his father was allergic to his hamsters and felt responsible for his anaphylaxis. She swiped at her eyes.

  “Patrick, honey, your father isn’t allergic to hamsters. I tested him a couple of weeks ago.”

  The boy’s head popped up. “He’s not allergic to them?”

  “No.” She shook her head.

  His tear-swollen eyes peered at her in sheer and ecstatic relief.

  She cleared her throat, unable to remove the swell of emotion from her voice. “This is what happens when we keep secrets. I should never have agreed. Because you didn’t tell your father, you’ve had to carry around a burden that must have been unbearable. And, worse, you almost gave your hamsters away because of it.”

  “I know.”

  “If you’d been honest, and told your dad what worried you, none of this would have been necessary.”

  The boy nodded his head with a pained expression.

  “Excuse me, folks, but it’s closing time.”

  “Sure. OK,” Beth said, standing up. “Thanks for taking care of Patrick and the hamsters. But we’ll take them back home where they belong.”

  “Let me get you a couple of travel boxes. Those Goldens fight when they’re in the same cage.”

  Patrick cracked a knowing smile. “I know.” He picked

  “Promise me you’ll never pull another stunt like this again. I don’t know what your father would do without you.”

  “I promise.”

  They got into her car and she buckled the boy into the backseat. Before she started the car she called Carmen and then Lauren. When she pulled out into traffic, Beth looked at Patrick in the rear-view mirror and smiled. “Let’s take the hamsters home, then go see your dad.”

  By the time they arrived at Mercy Hospital, things had calmed down considerably in the ED. Now stable, Gavin had been moved to the holding area for overnight observation.

  Beth delivered Patrick to Gavin’s side. He grew shy after seeing Gavin’s puffy, red-blotched face. Beth rubbed his shoulder and urged him closer.

  “Hey, buddy?” Gavin said. “You gave me a fright.”

  Patrick wasn’t the only one handing out fright that day. Gavin could have died, and it was Beth’s fault.

  “I’m sorry, Dad.” Gavin pulled Patrick closer for a hug. He looked at Beth, as though just noticing she was in the room, and mouthed “Thank you.” After their meeting and breakup in the stairwell earlier, she wasn’t sure if she should stick around or not. But she wanted to make sure Patrick finally told his father the truth and that they would sort things out before she left.

  “I was so scared when Carmen said you got sick. I thought it was my fault.” Patrick gave a cough. Twice. The boy either needed his inhaler or he was shaken up by his father’s appearance and it was a nervous bark.

  “I’m fine, Patrick.” They’d removed the airway and Gavin could talk again. He sounded as though he’d been smoking cigarettes his entire life. “My allergy shots were too much for me.” He pulled away from the boy to look into his eyes. “Why would this be your fault?”

  “Because of my hamsters.”

  “What hamsters?” Gavin glanced Beth’s way, first a question then understanding dawning on his face.

  “My secret hamsters. I thought you were allergic, just like our cat Tommy. I thought I made you sick.” The boy burst into tears and Gavin held him close.

  “No. You didn’t make me sick, but you should never have kept a secret from me.”

  “I know,” the boy sobbed.

  Gavin rubbed Patrick’s head. “Listen, buddy, it’s you and me. No matter what, we’ll always have each other. I’ll take care of my allergies, and you won’t ever keep a secret or run away again. OK?”

  “OK, Dad.”

  As obvious as the smell in Marvin’s Menagerie, a thought occurred to Beth. The poor man had a responsibility to his son right now. They’d steamrollered into each other’s lives and she’d thrown him curve ball after curveball.

  Patrick had promised to tell Gavin about his secret pets, and Beth had assumed their fishing trip would have been the perfect time. Instead, she’d deceived Gavin by not telling him in the first place.

  What kind of a mom would she make? She’d colluded with a nine-year-old boy over secret hamsters, and look at all the trouble it had caused. The boy had run away and any number of horrible things could have happened to

  The whole mess was her fault—anaphylaxis from the kiss, running away because of the secret. Gavin and Patrick deserved more time and plenty of space to regroup and heal, and the Riordan boys would be much better off without her.

  Reassured that Gavin was fine, Beth backed away from the ER cubicle and turned to leave. She saw Carmen on her way out. “I don’t want to disturb them any more. Patrick needs time alone with his dad.”

  Carmen nodded in understanding.

  “By the way, I think Patrick needs his inhaler. Could you make sure he takes a puff or two?”

  “Will do.”

  She’d made the right decision to break things off. Between Gavin getting her pregnant and her almost killing
him, they’d proved to be hazardous to each other’s health. She loved him, but that was a different matter. Keeping it real, at this moment, Patrick needed a father more than Gavin needed a pregnant girlfriend.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  BETH taped the last box, lifted it and piled it on top of the others in her living room. The modest-sized apartment had never felt more cramped. Speaking of cramped, her muscles would pay later for all of the packing, bending and lifting. She used her palms to massage her lower back, which had been hurting more each day.

  Today marked the beginning of her second trimester. She’d never gotten this far in a pregnancy before. She smiled ruefully and shook her head. Life was so damn crazy.

  Jillian came lumbering down the short hall with a dust smudge on her cheek and her red hair flagrantly misbehaving. She held a cardboard box in one arm and a lamp in the other. “Where should I put this?”

  “Oh. Leave the lamp where it is. I’ll need it tonight.”

  “OK, boss.” Jillian smiled and made an about-face.

  Jillian had helped her get through the past two weeks and, eternally grateful, Beth wondered how she would have survived without her friendship. When she’d cried until she’d thought she’d vomit after making the hardest decision of her life—to stay away from Gavin and

  Friends like Jillian and men like Gavin only came along once in a lifetime.

  Moving in with Ruth was a small sacrifice for the sake of the babies. But the decision had taken its toll, and today, when Beth should have been celebrating the beginning of her second trimester, she felt weary.

  She surveyed the room. Lila stretched across the back of the only remaining chair, eyes squinting, the tip of her tail flicking and betraying her discontent. “Oh, get over it. Ruth loves you.”

  Would Beth be any happier than her cat, moving back with her mother to a house one step away from the demolition ball? How had everything gotten so messed up?

  Lifting another box, Beth felt moisture between her legs. Realizing she’d been holding back too long, she needed to use the bathroom.

  Gavin walked Patrick to the ER, feeling bad the boy would have to spend another Saturday in the Mercy Hospital doctors’ lounge. But that was the reality of being a single father. He glanced up in time to see a wild-maned redhead running for the entrance. Jillian.