Luminous
Page 7
She’d learned only a few days ago how rare it was for one to... for one to...
“Improbable,” Sophie disagreed before Katherine had the fortitude to finish the thought. “Before last night, anyway. Now, it’s looking very, very likely.”
“But what does... that have to do with not being able to transform?” Katherine demanded.
“Well, pregnancy does odd things to the body,” Gabriela said, finally naming exactly what condition it was that she and Sophie clearly thought was ailing her.
Pregnancy.
They thought Katherine was pregnant.
Katherine couldn’t suppress a flinch at the word, but Gabriela either didn’t see or ignored the reaction as she continued her explanation. “In werewolves, the influx of pregnancy hormones actually suppresses many of our usual instincts. For example, pregnant werewolves often lose their craving for red meat.” She made sure to catch Katherine’s eye for the next part. “And they certainly can’t shift. After all, werewolves can’t properly transform into their wolf forms until puberty hits. This holds true for weres in the womb as well. If a mother shifted while pregnant, the fetus growing inside of her would die.”
Mother? Womb? Fetus?
Katherine desperately pushed down the hysteria that was threatening to make its appearance in the form of vomiting. “No,” she managed to blurt when it became obvious Gabriela and Sophie were waiting for a reaction. She ran a shaking hand through her wild hair. “I mean, I just don’t think...”
But Katherine couldn’t bring herself to finish the sentence. Even she knew that whatever protest was about to leave her mouth would be half-hearted at best. As much as she wanted to deny it, Gabriela’s explanation made perfect sense.
The woman must have sensed her crumbling resolve, and she wasted no time taking advantage of it. “Well, it’s easy enough to find out for sure. Come sit,” she said, pointing at one of the empty beds as she stood and made her way to the door that Katherine knew led to the closet full of medical equipment.
Operating completely on auto-pilot, Katherine obliged.
Gabriela emerged from the closet holding what looked like a blocky walkie-talkie. It had a curled cord that was attached to a sort of short, fat wand. She placed whatever the device was down on her desk before digging in one of its drawers and pulling out a squeeze bottle of clear jelly.
Leaving the tool on her desk, she approached Katherine with the goop. “Lay down,” she instructed, using a gentle hand to push Katherine back against the mattress. “I’m just going to squirt some of this on your stomach and see if we can get a heartbeat on my Doppler.”
Gabriela had grabbed the bottom of her sweater and lifted it up past her belly button before Katherine’s brain managed to process the word “Doppler” and it occurred to her to protest.
Because that device on Gabriela’s desk was a Doppler. As in a fetal heart rate Doppler.
Feeling the beginnings of panic balloon in her throat, Katherine shot her hand forward and grabbed onto Gabriela’s before she could apply the jelly to her stomach. “Stop.”
Katherine wasn’t ready for confirmation. At least not right now. Not in this way.
The relief she felt when Gabriela immediately took a step back was immense, and Katherine didn’t waste a minute yanking down her sweater and pushing herself back into a sitting position. She pulled her knees up to her chest in an inherently self-protective gesture.
She was so relieved, in fact, that she didn’t even care about the concerned looks Gabriela and Sophie shot each other.
Gabriela recovered from her surprise quickly enough, however, and abandoning the bottle of jelly near the Doppler on her desk, she began digging through her drawers for something else. “Okay, look, I can’t make you do things my way,” she granted, “but I insist on you having a definitive answer before you leave. If you are, indeed, pregnant – and I strongly suspect that you are – Bastian and the rest of your pack needs to be aware of the delicate condition you’re in so that they can take care of you properly and ensure that they aren’t overly rough with you.”
Katherine bristled at the insinuation that Bastian, or any of her pack mates for that matter, were ever “overly rough” with her, but at the same time, she couldn’t really bring herself to dispute the implication because, well... they were all werewolves – not exactly known for their self-control and handsy by nature.
Gabriela pulled out what ended up being a small, thin box. Judging by the picture on its side, it contained a single pregnancy test. She thrust the box at Katherine. “The instructions are simple enough. You can take the test in the bathroom right now,” she said. “All you have to do is pee on the stick,” she added when Katherine didn’t immediately move to take the box.
Katherine stared. Her mouth was dry, and she desperately wanted to protest, but as much as she tried to think of a good reason why she shouldn’t take the test, she kept coming up empty.
“Katherine?” Sophie prodded softly, jolting her out of her stupor.
“Yeah, okay,” she said, reaching forward and hesitantly taking the boxed test before she could second guess herself.
Gabriela pointed her in the direction of the bathroom, and Katherine reluctantly shuffled into the small room, closing the door behind her.
“All you have to do is pee on a stick.”
It was a lot harder than it sounded.
Katherine took her time unpacking the test stick from its box and carefully read through the tiny pamphlet of instructions that came along with the test at least three times. Then she had to wait for her nervous bladder to finally relax enough to pee on the damn thing.
If she’d thought she’d been jumpy before taking the test, however, it was nothing compared to how she felt after she’d urinated on the stupid stick. Said stick was currently lying face down on the edge of the sink as Katherine waited the advised three minutes for it to finish detecting the result.
Knock. Knock.
She nearly jumped out of her skin at the sudden noise.
“You okay in there?” Sophie asked through the door.
Katherine took a deep breath. “Fine,” she assured, relieved her voice didn’t crack in the middle of the word – the lie. She knew it wouldn’t be long until the two women demanded she come out, or worse, they decided to barge in.
So just look at it, she told herself sternly. Forget three minutes, it’s already been well over five.
Taking a deep breath, Katherine did just that. She reached forward before she could lose her nerve, picked the test up off the counter, flipped it around, and looked at the tiny little screen on the widest part of the stick.
She stared at the result for a solid minute. No matter how intently she gawked, however, it didn’t change. Katherine had read the instructions that had come with the test from start to finish enough times to know exactly what she was looking at. One line meant the test was negative. No baby. Two lines meant the test was positive. Surprise, you’re going to be a mommy!
She was staring at two solid, perfectly pink lines.
Tears blurred Katherine’s vision, and a whirlwind of emotions she didn’t dare examine too closely made breathing suddenly difficult. As much as she tried to bat them away, however, she couldn’t help but pinpoint the panic and fear amongst them. She was surprised that there was an unexpected burst of joy somewhere in the swirling mess too.
But Katherine’s emotions hardly mattered. All of her feelings were overshadowed by the words Bastian had uttered mere days ago, ringing with clarity in her head.
“I don’t want kids.”
CHAPTER FIVE
“This is so exciting. I can’t believe I’m going to be an auntie! I wonder if the baby’s a boy or a girl.” A pause. “I bet it’s a girl. I can already picture all the cute, little dresses she’ll wear. Of course, we’ll have to go shopping at the mall in Fort Saskatchewan; there’s not exactly an abundance of baby clothes to choose from here in Haven Falls.”
Katherine was only m
“I don’t want kids.”
Katherine was forced from her numb state when the SUV began to slow, coming to a dawdling halt on the side of the road. She shot Sophie a confused look. After all, the Prince house was still a solid mile away...
And immediately wished she hadn’t. The blonde’s features were twisted in blatant concern.
“Katherine, are you okay?”
Katherine opened her mouth to declare that she was “fine”, “good”, maybe even to offer a sarcastic “just dandy”, but the words got stuck in her throat, refusing to come out. And then to her horror, she could feel the tears she thought she had successfully battled away in the clinic bathroom return to her eyes.
“Am I ok-ay?” she repeated, her voice cracking on the last word before irrational – and if she was being completely honest, misdirected – anger took hold of her. “Really, Sophie? What do you think? As you’re pandering on about how thrilled you are to be an auntie, I’m trying to come to terms with the fact that I’m about to become a mom at the age of seventeen!” She wrenched her gaze away from the blonde, digging the heels of her hands into her eyes, willing the wetness she could feel threatening to spill out of them to just go away. “God, I’m just like those stupid girls on that even stupider MTV show.” She took a deep breath. “Like those girls that judgmental grannies stare at in supermarkets, making snide comments under their breath about how they couldn’t keep their legs closed.”
Sophie wrinkled her nose in confusion at the television show reference, but understood well enough what Katherine was saying. “Oh honey...”
“Jesus, Sophie, my mom used to make those comments,” she said, turning to face the other girl. “It was one of her biggest fears, that one of her daughters would get pregnant before graduating college, much less high school, and here I am, about to make her a grandma before she’s even turned fifty.”
“Katherine, you have graduated school. Maybe not the high school in Middletown, but certainly the one in Haven Falls. And in Haven Falls, you’re very much considered an adult. Besides, you don’t know for sure what your mom will say. Maybe her views have changed since then. After all, you certainly have.”
Despite Sophie’s attempt to comfort her, Katherine knew very well what her mother would say.
“What were you thinking?”
“How could you do this to me?”
“Haven’t you already thrown enough of your life away? Get your butt home right now, young lady!”
Katherine’s father hadn’t exactly told her why it was that Katherine had to leave Middletown last spring, and while Katherine made the effort to call home at least twice a month, her relationship with Elaine had been rocky at best since she’d left – though if she were being honest, it’d been shaky for a long time.
“And, trust me,” Sophie continued, ignorant of Katherine’s inner dialogue, “no one in Haven Falls will be looking at you like you’re some sort of slut when you start to show.”
Katherine shot Sophie a believing look. “Sure,” she deadpanned.
“Well, you will get looks,” Sophie admitted, “but hardly for the reason you think. New life is treasured here, especially with the recent concerns about our population. Old ladies will be fighting to be the first to rub your belly, not making nasty comments behind your back.”
That did not make Katherine feel any better. She didn’t want any attention directed her way, good or bad, and the idea of people she hardly knew grabbing at her stomach caused an oddly protective feeling to buzz under her skin.
It was a strange thing to feel something so strongly for something – someone – she hadn’t even been aware existed a mere hour ago.
“I don’t think I’m ready for this,” Katherine admitted in a near whisper, crossing her arms over her stomach as if the baby she was now thoroughly aware was in there could hear her words and take offence.
Sophie gently took ahold of Katherine’s chin, forcing her to meet her eyes. “Of course you’re ready. If you were ready enough to mate with my brother, then you’re ready enough for this. After all, falling pregnant is a pretty normal result of having sex.”
Feeling a hot blush creep up her neck, Katherine jerked her chin out of Sophie’s hand. Her words had sounded suspiciously like a lecture – a lecture Katherine really didn’t need right now. After all, she knew perfectly well that sex could led to pregnancy, and she and Bastian had had plenty of it, all of it unprotected. She just hadn’t thought... she hadn’t thought...
That was it. She just hadn’t thought.
Katherine squeezed her eyes tightly shut, willing away the stupid, traitorous tears she could feel threatening to well in them again.
“Hey,” Sophie said, tone of voice much gentler as she tentatively took one of Katherine’s hands into her own. “All I meant was that you’ve faced so much adversity this past year. The life you had always known was abruptly ripped away from you. You’ve helped take down men twice your size who were trying to kill you. You even manage to put up with my brother on a daily basis. If you can do all that, you can do this. And you won’t be doing it alone. You have me, the pack, and Bastian, of course.”
Bastian.
Dread pooled in Katherine’s stomach as she once again recalled his words.
“I don’t want kids.”
How was she supposed to tell him?
As much as Katherine worried about all the other obstacles that came along with having a baby – not the least of which was the actual having a baby part – it was his reaction to the news that truly scared her.
But she couldn’t tell that to Sophie.
She took a deep breath, squeezing Sophie’s hand once with her own before pulling it away. “You’re right,” she said, pacifying the girl instead. “I know you are. I’m just overwhelmed and kind of tired. Can we please go home?”
Sophie offered her a soft smile. “Sure.”
The blonde shifted the vehicle back into drive, and they were once again on their way. Only a few minutes later, they were turning into their gravel driveway. Sophie didn’t even have the chance to put the SUV into park before Bastian was storming out of the house’s front doors, his expression dark and his pace brisk as he cumbered down the porch steps and marched to the car.
Unimpressed by her brother’s display, Sophie just rolled her eyes. She reached for her door handle, apparently intent on meeting him in the yard. Before she could open the door, however, Katherine hurriedly grabbed her sleeve. “Please don’t say anything about... well, you know,” she hurriedly requested as she eyed the man’s approach. “I want to be the one to tell him.”
Sophie’s face immediately softened from an irritated pinch to an understanding smile. “Of course,” she assured.
Katherine hadn’t gained Sophie’s compliance a second too soon because a moment later, Bastian was ripping open the passenger side door. His hands went to her face, the gesture almost involuntary as he took her between his hands, thumbs smoothing over the skin under her eyes as he looked her over. While his gaze may have been focused on her, the question that tore out of his mouth was directed at Sophie. “Where have you been?” he demanded angrily.
“The clinic, of course,” Sophie responded in an offhanded manner that she must have known would annoy Bastian. “You did want her to go first thing in the morning, didn’t you?”
Bastian sent Sophie a glare over Katherine’s head, clearly debating while he glowered if it was worth it to point out that he’d obviously intended to go with her. Ultimately, his thirst for answers must have been greater than his urge to tear into his sister. He turned his eyes back onto Katherine. “Well, how’d it go then? Did Gabriela look you over? What did she say?”
When Katherine opened her mouth to respond, she intended to tell the truth – truly, she did! – but the words got trapped somewhere between her throat and her tongue. “Uh... well...”
Katherine was frozen, utterly unsettled by the concerned azure eyes boring holes into her green ones, and before she’d had even made the conscious decision to do it, she was talking. “Nothing, really. She just said I probably have some sort of stomach bug, which is why my appetite has been so shoddy lately, which led to me passing out a few days ago. Otherwise, I’m fine. In perfect health, just like I tried to tell you.”
...Except the words that poured out of her mouth were lies.
“A stomach bug?” Bastian repeated doubtfully, and Katherine could hardly blame him. Werewolves weren’t exactly known for catching common illnesses with their evolved immune systems.
“Well, I did manage to get pneumonia seven, eight months ago, too,” she pointed out.
Bastian’s skepticism cleared at the reminder, but his concern didn’t disappear as he finally let go of her face. “Only you,” he muttered, shaking his head before pulling her into a fierce hug. “Well, simple stomach bug or not, I want you to take it easy until your appetite is back to normal.”
Katherine buried her face into Bastian’s shoulder, content to ignore Sophie’s burning gaze on the back of her head for now, but guilt caused her stomach to churn and the words were bitter on her tongue when she responded, “Don’t worry. I think I feel better already.”
* * *
Liar.
Katherine felt like she had the word inked across her forehead in big, block letters. Almost an entire week had passed since she’d found out she was what she had started mentally referring to as “the p-word”, and still she hadn’t managed to tell Bastian. It wasn’t that she hadn’t tried; it was just that every time she managed to work up the courage to do it, something would go... well, not wrong exactly, but sideways at the very least.
For example, she’d been intent on correcting her mistake – her lie – that very first night.
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