Four Crows

by Lily White

  Silence filled the space between us for several tense seconds.

  Speaking slowly and fighting for control, Elliot clenched his hands into fists over the dirty stuffed rabbit in his lap. “I need my son back.”

  “I can’t give you that,” I admitted on a helpless whisper. “But I can give you what you sought me out for in the first place. I can help you end this, Elliot. But I can’t do it without your help, as well. I’m not God. I can’t erase the past. But what I can give you is vengeance. I can lead you where you need to go to make sure what happened to your son never happens again.”

  His head shook again, his teeth grinding beneath his cheeks. “We can’t stop all the monsters, Maggie.”

  “No,” I agreed, “we can’t. But we can stop two of them. We can stop the ones responsible for your wife and son. That has to be enough.”

  “I want them dead, Maggie. I want them crushed until there’s nothing left of them. I want them buried beneath the dirt and I want them erased and forgotten.”

  Bravery was a funny thing. Just hours before I swore I was the weakest person alive, but when the opportunity presented itself for me to be the strong one, I was brave enough to answer the call. I guessed it was just another part of a person that they never understood existed until it was staring them in the face and demanding that they do anything it took to survive.

  “Then let’s erase them. I’ll show you where they are. And you’ll make sure they never see the light of day again.”

  More silence filled the interior of the truck. My hands gripped the wheel and my lungs held onto a breath as I waited for him to respond.

  After the tension had climbed so high that I thought I’d be crushed beneath it, Elliot’s shoulders softened, his head fell back against the seat and his hands stop clutching the stuffed animal in his lap.

  “You promise me you’re taking me to them? That we’re on our way to end this?”

  I released the breath I’d been holding.

  “Yeah, Elliot, that’s what I’m promising you. But I can’t get there without you being here with me in the present. I can’t stop them if you remained trapped in the past.”

  He released his breath as well before turning his head to look in my direction. “Do you still need me to drive?”

  I didn’t mean to laugh at the question, but my nerves were frayed and it slipped out of me before I could stop it.

  “Not anymore. After almost being strangled, I’m fully awake.”

  His mouth pulled into a thin line and shame rolled behind his eyes. “I’m sorry, Maggie. I didn’t mean to take that out on you.”

  Giving him a gentle smile, I reached to turn the key and start the engine. “Don’t worry about it, Elliot. If it had been me, I’d probably have done the same.”

  I’d barely had time to pull off the shoulder of the road before light laughter shook his shoulders.

  Glancing over, I gave him a questioning look.

  The corners of his lips turned up into a sad smile. “No, you wouldn’t have, beautiful. But thanks anyway, even though you are a horrible liar.”

  He was still sad as we continued down the road, but it was a hell of a lot better than catatonic.

  Two days passed along with several thousand miles, Elliot and I both allowing the tranquil silence to help ease some of the strain of the past couple days. In the moments we weren’t lost to our own thoughts and emotions, we talked to each other about random subjects. I learned about Elliot’s family and the normal life in which he’d been raised. He learned about the constellations I’d taught myself on the nights I’d escaped my family’s parties, and he’d laughed to learn that I was scared of small spiders. I liked the sound of his laughter, even if it was still somewhat sad.

  We’d crossed several state lines on our way to the family’s secret hideaway, but we both were running out of fuel and in need of some rest and relaxation. Although Elliot was determined to end this nightmare as soon as was humanly possible, I’d convinced him that one good night’s sleep wouldn’t hurt him, and that it would help for the fight to come.

  Within six hours of our destination, we pulled into a hotel that sat lonely on the side of a long, remote road, and after checking in with fake names, we let ourselves into the room to collapse on the first bed we’d seen since leaving Elliot’s bed back home.

  “Fuck, it feels good to lay down,” Elliot muttered, his eyes half closed and his body stretched across the mattress.

  Eyeing the way his shirt rode up and the muscles of his abdomen peeked out to say hello, I bit down on my lip and kept myself from exploring the way they would feel beneath my fingertips.

  “You know what else might feel good?” I asked, a shy smile tilting my lips at the way he stared up at me.

  “What’s that?”

  A shiver coursed through my body at the rough tone of his voice.

  “A shower.”

  His eyes clenched shut, but his lips pulled apart into a wide smile. “Damn woman, it has been so long since I’ve had one of those, I’d almost forgotten what they are.”

  Laughing at his attempt at humor, I couldn’t help but feel happy that he was no longer crushed. He never told me what he found in those sheds, and I didn’t press him on the subject. I needed him here with me in the present moment and not plagued by the memories of what had been done.

  “Well, you’ll just have to wait, mister, because I call first dibs.”

  Thankfully, my monthly visitor had ended the day before, but it left me feeling gross and neglected for not having had the chance to freshen up.

  Shuffling my tired feet into the bathroom, I turned on the water to let it heat up and gladly stripped my body of the clothes I’d been wearing for way too many days. I had no way of washing them, and didn’t much care to remember all the places I’d been and the nightmares I’d seen while wearing them. Tossing them in the trashcan that sat next to the sink, I felt like a million pounds had been lifted off me before climbing in beneath the spray of hot, steamy water.

  In all my years, I’d never enjoyed anything more than this shower. The stream of water was like hot fingers massaging away all the conflict and turmoil coiled inside me. Turning my face up into the spray, I stood still as the water traced down the lines of my face, eventually settling over my tired shoulders and washing the grime of my past from my skin. I imagined that all the pain, horror and torment I’d suffered both emotionally and physically was sucked down by the drain at my feet and after cleaning my body, I hated to step away from the warm safety of the spray to emerge back into the harsh reality that my life had irrevocably changed.

  Fresh white towels hung in wait on the bar and I wrapped myself in their soft touch before turning to look at the woman who stared back at me in the mirror. Was it possible to have aged years within only a handful of days? My face seemed thinner, the angles harder and more mature. My skin glowing from the heat of the water contrasted sharply against the white towel. The curves of a woman’s body were evident beneath the terrycloth that covered it, and my eyes flashed with a fiery resilience that I’d never seen before.

  Opening the door, I stepped into the main room to grab my bag of clothes, the steam chasing after me like phantom hands that wanted to hold me within their warmth.

  Glancing towards the bed, I laughed softly to discover that Elliot lay still on his stomach, his arms reaching up to hug the pillow that was nestled beneath his weary head. Unsure whether I should wake him so he could jump in the shower, I stepped lightly over the faded green carpet in search of my bag. With my back to Elliot, I pulled out a pair of panties, some sleep shorts and a weathered t-shirt that was worn in all the right places so that it was neither restrictive nor harsh against my skin.

  Dropping the towel, I bent over to pull on my panties and damn near fell to the floor when Elliot spoke.

  “The bruises are already fading,” he noted on a voice thick with exhaustion.

  Reaching for the towel, I hugged it to my body and spun in place.
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  “The bruises?”

  A grin stretched his lips as he pushed up to lay on his side. With his head resting on one hand, he stared at me with grey eyes that were a contrast of lust and utter despair. I wanted to wipe the pain from the lines of his face, but I didn’t dare move. I’d only been naked in front of one other man, and I refused to allow those memories to climb back up to the forefront of my mind.

  “Yeah, the bruises that ran up your legs. And the…well…” His voice trailed off, anger a light that glowed behind his gaze.

  “I would have killed that man if you hadn’t distracted me. Would have done the same thing as your father if we’d returned and he hadn’t beaten me to it.”

  Not knowing what to say, I chewed on the back of my lip, my weight shifting between my feet. I felt so exposed, but it didn’t feel wrong when Elliot was my audience. Not like it felt with Jack when the choice hadn’t been mine.

  “I’m glad you didn’t,” I admitted softly. “You didn’t need his blood on your hands. You’re not a killer, Elliot –“

  “Yeah, Darlin’, I am.”

  Startled by the sincerity of his words, I stepped back out of instinct. He didn’t release me from the intensity of his stare, didn’t paint pretty pictures to seduce me closer.

  “You need to know that about me before things progress further between us. I’m not the same kind of monster you’re used to, but I’m a monster all the same. And when it comes to protecting what’s mine, there’s nothing out there I wouldn’t do, even if it means I have to take somebody’s life.”

  Shaking my head, I averted my eyes. It was impossible to look at the beauty of his face and to hear him tell me such wicked truths about who he was inside.

  “I’d never ask you to kill for me.”

  “You wouldn’t have to. And if your life was on the line, you couldn’t stop me either. I’m a possessive, protective, man, Maggie. What’s mine is mine and I will fight to the death if need be to keep it that way.”

  His words should have been comforting, but after what I’d been through in life, they shook me to my core. “What if I no longer wanted to be yours? What if I wanted to walk away?”

  “I’d let you,” he admitted. “But if that wasn’t something you wanted, then you can bet I’d never let you out of my sight.” He paused for a second, his chest moving with the inhalation of breath. “I’m sorry, but I’m not sure I’ll ever move past what happened to Katelyn and Michael when I wasn’t there to protect them. If you really want to try this with me, you need to know that I’ll always be watching over you.”

  A smile tilted his lips, soft and sad. “I may actually be annoying as hell by how closely I watch you. But can you blame me? Just look at yourself, Maggie. You’re absolutely breathtaking.”

  And just like that all the anxiety I felt melted away. Taking cautious steps in his direction, I felt like a bunny creeping towards a snake. His eyes were all seeing, his body lying in repose when I knew he could strike between one second and the next. Nerves had my knees shaking beneath me, but I ignored the desire to move away. If ever I needed to face my fears and learn to trust, it was right now, right here, and with this man who had stolen away my ability to think clearly.

  Standing by the edge of the bed, I locked my eyes with his and allowed the towel to slide down my body.

  He didn’t move a muscle, didn’t pull his intense gaze from my eyes. “Are you sure, beautiful? Are you sure you can do this? That you want to do this?”

  Nodding my head slowly, I watched him with timid fascination. “You seem to ask me that question a lot, Elliot. And there hasn’t yet been something I couldn’t do when you were standing there next to me.”

  Rolling onto his back, he kept his eyes trained on mine, and only moved to crook his finger in my direction calling me to his side. “I’ll let you lead this dance – for the first time, at least. I won’t push you, Maggie. Not until you say that’s what you want.”

  My knees were practically knocking together. Ignoring the trembling of my body, and the erratic beat of my heart, I climbed onto the bed, crawling on hands and knees until I was straddling his lap.

  “What do you want?” he asked, his voice rough with desire.

  There was only one simple answer I could give. “I want you to touch me. I want you to show me what you promised to show me all those times we met at that abandoned farm.”

  His mouth pulled into a grin and his hands slid slowly up my naked thighs. I gasped when his thumbs brushed between my legs, but then turned quickly to trace up the curve of my hips, the sensitive sides of my ribcage and breasts, up to my shoulders and then pulled me down until my mouth joined with his.

  We kissed until we were gasping, but when he pulled away, his lips were still pressed softly to mine. “What if I lose control? Will I scare you? I don’t want to be like that other man -“

  Slipping my tongue out to slide along his bottom lip, I silenced all of his concerns with a long drawn out kiss. I understood then that I trusted Elliot more than I trusted myself at times, and that if any person could show me what it meant to be loved, it was the man who’d already promised he would always protect me.

  Speaking against his mouth, I was breathless when I said, “I’m yours to do with what you want, Elliot. Tonight. Tomorrow. And for as long as you’ll have me.”

  From that moment forward, there was nothing left I needed to say.

  She weighed practically nothing. It was the first thing I noticed about her when she crawled up to straddle my lap. Struggling to keep my hands traveling slowly and carefully over her trembling body, I pulled her into a kiss that sealed the promise that I would always be there to watch over her. I tried to convey with actions instead of words the truth of how I felt about a woman who, through tragedy, had crept inside my fractured and weary heart.

  Maggie wasn’t just a bandage for the pain that almost destroyed me, she was a balm that healed the soul. Her innocence consoled me, her beauty reminding me that despite the horrors of this world, there were still experiences to look forward to, still people I could love and trust.

  Our relationship hadn’t started on the firmest of foundations, but once the facades were tossed aside and the truth about our lives was revealed to one another, I discovered another part of myself within the body of a young woman who was far older than the number of years she’d actually lived.

  We’d been introduced through warfare and heartache, and yet we’d walked out stronger because we were united together in the promise that we could live on.

  With my mouth pressed against hers, I allowed my hands to travel the length of her body, touching and teasing, but never giving her what I knew she begged for with those cute little moans that had me groaning in return. It was impossible not to let myself go to the lust that consumed me as soon as my palms met the warmth of her smooth, supple skin, but I restrained myself to lead her through a dance that started off slow, only to stoke the flames of desire so hot that she was left panting with need.

  Tracing my fingertips down her shoulders, I stroked softly over the outside of her breasts, smiling at how her body bucked over mine. I wanted to watch her reaction to each and every touch I gave her, but found it impossible to pull away from a kiss that was filled with sweet passion and raw, breathless trust.

  She jumped when I brushed my hands down her ribs, and I discovered how ticklish she was. Laughing against her mouth, I opened my eyes to find hers staring right back at me, humor sparkling behind the depth of green.

  “Sorry,” I mumbled, but it wasn’t a true apology. Looking forward to a day where I could hold her down and tickle her until she begged me to stop, I gripped my hands over her thighs, pushing them apart until she was nestled over the hardness of my cock.

  “Oh,” her mouth opened on that surprised sound, her eyes widening before closing as she fell forward.

  “No, you don’t,” I teased, my hands moving quickly to push against her shoulders and set her up above me so I could worship the view o
f true perfection. Black hair fell in waves from her head over her shoulders, and I pushed the tresses back to run down behind her so that my view was unobstructed.

  Her entire body blushed when I studied her, the rosy color magnificent against the pale beauty of her skin.

  “Are you scared?”

  Shaking her head, she flashed me a shy smile. “Not with you,” she purred, her lush lips kiss swollen and soft red.

  Unable to continue this tormenting, slow rhythm, I gave into desire and cupped the weight of her breasts. Her head fell back, her hair long enough to brush over my thighs. Surprising me like she always had the ability to do, she began to move over top of me rubbing herself over the length of my cock that was still painfully trapped in my pants.

  “I want you, Maggie Crow. More than I think you realize. It was torture for me to keep from taking you every way I wanted when we first started playing these games.”

  Her lips pulled into a wider grin, her head angling down so that her eyes could meet mine. “Then stop torturing yourself. I’m telling you I’m yours. You’re the one stupid enough not to take what’s being offered.”

  It was all she needed to say to push me into being a slave to my desire. Flipping her over until she was flat against the bed, I laughed at the cry of surprise that burst from her lips. A man crazed and desperate for release, I kissed her all over her body, my teeth finding the sensitive, hard peaks of her breasts and tasting the warm heat between her legs. The moans that escaped her throat were a vibration against my cock, lengthening and awakening me until I couldn’t stand it any longer.

  Pushing myself up to my knees, I stared down at the trembling woman where she lay sprawled on the bed. Her hair was a river of midnight black splayed over pillows of white. Pulling the shirt from my body, I groaned when she reached up to run her hands down my chest and over my stomach, and we both reached for the button of my pants which I couldn’t open fast enough.

  Finally freed of my clothing, I nestled myself between her legs. My hands slipped down between the mattress and the soft mounds of her perfect ass and I lifted her hips to position myself at the opening of her body.