When You Wish

by Deidra D. S. Green

  It was something about Star he liked. Maybe it was the look of danger in her eyes. She never dropped her gaze from him as she moved closer to Chance. Star smiled at him as she inched closer. When she finally reached Chance she leaned over him; her voluptuous breasts just inches from his mouth. Turning away from him, but maintaining eye contact until the last possible second, Star descended onto Chance’s lap; her wide hips cradled nicely on top of him. Star reached for Chance’s hands; taking each one into her own and used his hands to stroke her. Star placed both Chance’s hands against her love box and pressed his hands firmly against it; his fingers falling between the folds of her lips which were slightly masked by her pink thong. The rise in Chance’s manhood was undeniable at this point. Star felt it and pressed herself down harder against the bulge she felt in his pants. Star arched her back - covered Chance’s hands - and guided his fingers inside her. She had taken the lap dance to a whole new level as she covertly helped Chance finger her. Star’s wetness excited Chance. He didn’t think he could hold out any longer.

  Star made sure he didn’t have to. Easing his fingers out of her and turning around to face him, she whispered in his ear. The brief exchange led to Star extending her hand to Chance and him following her into the adjoining bedroom, closing the door to the party behind them; the cheers from his party mates being instantly drowned out as the door shut closed.

  Star wasted no time leading Chance over to the bed. Dropping down in front of him, Star easily removed his pants and dropped his underwear around his ankles. Chance knew he should protest, but he couldn’t. Thoughts of Alexis were fleeting. He needed a woman’s touch, and Star was willing to oblige.

  Chance was so caught up that he didn’t hear the knock at the door of the suite. At first Luke didn’t hear it either over all the noise, but whoever was outside the door was persistent. Eventually the door was answered by one of the fellas standing closest to it. Luke looked up to see Alexis standing at the door dressed in a closed black satin trench coat, fishnet pantyhose and black patent leather pumps. She smiled warmly as she entered the room, walking directly over to Luke.

  Kissing him lightly on the cheek she asked, “Where is he?”

  Luke was completely caught off guard, not knowing what to say. Outside of the music playing in the background, there was a hush that fell over the room. The men attending the bachelor party were all too familiar with Chance’s fiancé standing amongst them.

  Luke was unresponsive. He didn’t know what to say, but he knew he needed to get Alexis out of there as quickly as possible. If not, this would definitely end badly. Alexis looked around the suite and didn’t see Chance, but she did see how nervously Luke responded and how none of the men she looked at would return her gaze. Something was wrong. Something was real wrong and she could feel it. Alexis eyed the only closed door to the main room of the suite. She looked at the door and looked back at Luke. He dropped his head. Alexis began to move toward the closed door and Luke jumped in front of her.

  “Lex, you don’t want to do that,” he said leaning over and whispering in her ear.

  Alexis pulled away from him and smiled.

  “That’s where you’re wrong, Luke, that’s exactly what I want to do.”

  Alexis sauntered over to the closed door. Although her heart was racing and her palms were sweating, she didn’t want any of the men watching her to see her upset. Luke knew he couldn’t stop her even if he tried. The look in her eye told him that. All he could do was watch and shake his head as Alexis put her hand on the knob and pushed the door open. Of course neither Star nor Chance thought enough to lock it - they had no reason to.

  As the door swung open, Chance looked up; his manhood planted firmly in the mouth of the woman who kneeled at his feet. It was only after Chance stood frozen did Star even look up to see Alexis standing in the doorway. Once Chance’s mind registered that he was caught, he immediately began to offer apologies; even as he pulled his joystick gently from Star’s firm grasp. He pushed her out the way and reached for his clothes which were still draped around his ankles.

  “Shit…Lex, I’m so sorry…babe I’m sor-,” he repeated following her as she turned and walked away without saying a word.

  Alexis made her way back through the primary room and out the door; Chance following closely behind her. All the while he begged her to stop; saying he was sorry and could explain. Alexis didn’t respond. Her heart was broken, but she fought back the tears. She wasn’t going to give Chance the satisfaction of seeing her all torn up. No, he didn’t deserve that - not after what he just did.

  Alexis pushed feverishly on the elevator button; willing it to get to her floor quickly so she could get out of the hotel. Before the elevator arrived, Chance caught up to her.

  “Lex, just stop for a minute. Let me explain,” Chance offered nearly breathless.

  Alexis turned to face Chance attempting to mask the hurt in her eyes.

  “Oh you don’t have to explain Chance. There’s really nothing you can say now, is there?” Alexis’ gaze was unwavering. She was as much angry as she was wounded, but she refused to cry in front of Chance.

  “But Lex, please…I’m sorry…I love you,” he continued pleadingly.

  The ding from the elevator signaled its arrival. Alexis turned away from Chance and walked inside the awaiting carriage. Chance held his hand in front of the doors not allowing them to close.

  “Lex, please don’t do this. Give me a chance to explain.”

  “There’s nothing left to say, Chance. This is one thing neither of us can just wish away.”

  Alexis pushed the button commanding the elevator to move. As the doors raged to be closed, Chance had no choice but to release them. He watched as the doors closed slowly in front of him. Hanging his head in shame, Chance made his way back to the party suite. He wasn’t quite sure what to do with himself. He didn’t know whether he had completely ruined his chances with Alexis or not. In his heart of hearts he knew he had messed up, and the chances of being able to fix it with Lex were slim to none. She would call off the wedding; of that he was sure.

  As the doors to the elevator closed, a single tear fell from Alexis’ eye. She was hurt and disappointed. Less than 24 hours until my I do’s and this? It was hard for her to believe the man she loved so much, and so freely gave of herself to, would betray her on the eve of her wedding night. She knew in her heart it was over.

  Alexis knew there was nothing she could do to change the course of events. As she exited the W and waited for her car to be brought around, she wished things could have turned out differently. She wished Chance hadn’t messed everything up. She wished he could have honored their agreement. She wished she could turn back time. Even a part of her wished that she hadn’t felt so convicted about making love to Chance in the first place. So much for wishing…

  Excerpt from “The Marital Bed”

  (Coming December 2012)

  “Let The Church Say…”

  Sinclair Livingston was as nervous as any blushing bride could be. She had wished for this day for so long; having dreamed about it since she was a little girl. Sinclair was preparing to marry the man of her dreams. She couldn’t wait to be Mrs. Edward Jones. All she needed to do was hold it together a little while longer, get through the ceremony and wait for the pronouncement. This should be a breeze, right? Her year and a half of preparation and planning were finally coming to fruition. Picking the bridal party, selecting the wedding planner, dress, flowers and cake and selecting the honeymoon location were done. All Sinclair needed to do now was walk down the aisle to meet her future husband and pray that her lover and best friend wouldn’t blow it for her.

  Emanuel Baptist Church was the heart of the community. Erected some 160 years ago in the heart of the Parker District in Atlanta Georgia, generations of families had called Emanuel their spiritual home. Sinclair’s family was no different. They had been generational attendants of Emanuel since her great-great-grandfather settled in the area many decades earl
ier. Sinclair’s great-great-grandfather sang in the male chorus and was one of the first members of the deacon board. Her great-great-grandmother taught Sunday school and was on the welcoming committee. Sinclair’s father followed in the footsteps of his ancestors and sang lead tenor in the male chorus and sat on the deacon board. Her mother played the organ for the church.Pride in service to the community through the church had been, and continued to be, a family tradition.

  After graduating from high school, Sinclair attended Spelman College, a historically African-American women’s college right in the heart of Atlanta. After obtaining a bachelor’s degree in early childhood education, she continued her educational pursuits and earned a master’s degree in the same discipline. Although Sinclair was excited to be a new teacher in the Fulton County school district, she continued to grow within the walls of Emanuel Baptist. She always loved to sing and from very early on, she honed her vocal skills in the church. From watching her mother from the pews during Wednesday night choir rehearsal to participating in the children’s and junior choirs, Sinclair was presently the lead vocalist in the Young Adult Choir.

  Edward Jones could say much of the same about his family. Although their history with the churchwas not as extensive as Sinclair’s family, he was proud of the more than 50 years his family had represented the membership of Emanuel Baptist; his father, a long standing member of the trustee board, and his mother, a distinguished member of the usher board. Mr. and Mrs. Edwin Jones were proud of their son. After graduating from Xavier University with a bachelor’s degree in engineering, Edward returned to his hometown and church and made the decision to finish graduate school closer to home. His commitment to God made evident, Edward became an associate pastor of Emanuel Baptist. The Joneses never expected their son to go into the pulpit, but were grateful and proud of his service to the church. Pastor Paul F. Robinson took Edward under his wing and groomed him for leadership within the Emanuel family.

  Sinclair had known Edward since they were both very young. They grew up in the church together, and although they attended different schools and took different educational paths, the church always brought them back together. Whether it was a picnic, revival, family day, a wedding or a funeral, if they were in town, they both were at the church. Because she hadknown Edward almost her entire life, Sinclair never took him seriously. Growing up, he would pull her hair and tease her mercilessly. Edward was willing to get into trouble for doing it. His puppy love for her kept him coming back for more.

  Both of them were very popular in their own right so neither of them ever had a problem with the opposite sex. Edward and Sinclair grew closer, but it was strictly platonic. They had gotten to be such good friends that when Sinclair’s heart was broken by her high school sweetheart, it was Edward she confided in. She cried on his shoulder, and he consoled her. She didn’t know then that Edward had always had a thing for her and wanted her to be his girl. He liked her a lot, but wasn’t willing to risk their ‘friendship’ for something more. If she rejected his advances, Edward would have been crushed. As such, he was content staying in the background and hoping against hope that he would have his chance to be the love of Sinclair’s life. Sure, he dated other people, but inevitably he would compare them to Sinclair and they would never measure up. He knew who he wanted. Edward knew who he loved - whether she realized it or not.

  From the time Sinclair was old enough to dona choir robe and lift her melodic voice, Edward had been enamored with her. Whenever she would sing, he would become completely entranced. She had the voice of an angel, and the passion with which she sang always touched him in a way that no song and no singer had ever touched him before. Edward had almost given up all hope of ever having the girl he most desired when he got the perfect opportunity to let Sinclair know just how much she meant to him.

  It was a Sunday morning and the church was packed. Both Edward and Sinclair were in service that day. Sinclair sat in the choir stand. Edward was seated in the front of the church with the other associate pastors. He had an unobstructed view of the choir stand, and even though the choir was not singing at the moment, he couldn’t take his eyes off Sinclair. He knew she was reeling from a failed relationship, and from what he could gather she wasn’t seeing anyone. He wasn’t sure that mattered anyway. Edward had gotten to the point where he could no longer hold back. He wanted to tell Sinclair how he felt, but deep down inside he was still a bit afraid she would brush him off – or worse - be offended. He didn’t want to lose her in any capacity, but being relegated to the friend position was no longer good enough for him. Edward wanted more.

  Service was spirited this particular Sunday morning and the saints were in high praise. Even with everything going on around him, Edward couldn’t keep his mind or his eyes off Sinclair. She was perfect for him. He loved everything about her. He especially loved her mahogany skin and deep set black eyes which he found intense and mesmerizing. Sinclair wore her hair naturally - cut short and close to her head. It framed her face beautifully. More than that, Sinclair had the heart of God and she was smart too. Edward found her intelligence very sexy. Besides her natural beauty, Edward was in love with Sinclair’s spirit and willingness to be who she was and give of herself to others without condition.He knew she was the woman God had destined to be his futuresoul mateand wife.

  It came time in the service for the choir to sing. An unconscious smile crossed Edward’s face. He knew that he would get a chance to hear his beautiful Sinclair lift her voice to the heavens. He had to catch himself, though. He didn’t want to draw too much attention to himself sitting in the front of the church grinning at the lead vocalist. He didn’t want to give the saints the wrong impression. So he tried to hide his smile as best he could. At least now when he gazed unwaveringly into the choir stand, it would at least be justified.

  The musicians began to strum the first few chords to “Silver and Gold”, one of Edward’s all-time favorite songs. The director took his position in front of the choir, and with one motion, he brought them collectively to their feet. Sinclair stepped out front; the microphone positioned immediately in front of her.

  The choir began to sing, “Silver and gold, silver and gold, I’d rather have Jesus than silver and gold. No fame or fortune nor riches untold, I’d rather have Jesus than silver and gold.”

  And with the strike of a few more melodious chords, it was time for the verse. Edward didn’t realize it, but he was virtually holding his breath in anticipation of hearing his beloved’s voice.

  And as her solo began, Sinclair’s contralto voice filled the capacity of the sanctuary. Every eye was fixed and every ear was poised to hear the intense spirituality that exuded from her lips. Sinclair wasn’t just singing; she was ministering to the spirit of the believers through crescendos and decrescendos that mimicked the emotional testimonies of so many in the congregation. The saints shouted amen and burst into moments of spontaneous praise as she sang, but for Edward, her voice was the only one he could hear. He rode her vocal waves rising, cresting, and then falling accentuating the beautiful lyrics of the song. Even when the choir joined in ensemble, he could hear Sinclair’s beautiful intonations above all others. For Edward, it was heaven.

  But he wasn’t the only one tuned in to the euphonious tones pouring from the lips of the beautiful Sinclair. Pastor Robinson was enraptured with not just her gift of song, but her lust for life. As a single, young pastor he had to be discreet in his admirationgiven the transgressions in his not-so-distant past. But nothing about Sinclair escaped him. Since the moment he arrived at Emanuel, she stood out amongst all the women of the church. She was smart, dedicated, and dare he say sexy, in a sanctified sort of way. He wondered why one of the men in the church had not already made her his wife. Then again, maybe that’s why God allowed him the appointment to Emanuel Baptist, so he could be made whole and have a lovely First Lady on his arm. Sinclair certainly fit the bill.

  As the beautifully rendered song came to a glorious end, much of the con
gregation of Emanuel Baptist were already on their feet giving God a thunderous praise. Pastor Robinson knew that now was the time to capitalize on the members’ joyous outpouring and move into what he thought was a brilliant sermon. The echo of Sinclair’s brilliant voice played in his ears as he approached the rostrum.

  There was another person clearly tuned in to Sinclair; her best girlfriend, Jasmine Fleming. Unlike the families of Edward and Sinclair, Jasmine’s family was not lifetime and generational members of the church. Jasmine had been attending Emanuel Baptist since she was a little girl and attended Sunday school classes with Sinclair and Edward; however, unlike the two of them who rode to church on Sunday in the luxurious comfort of their parents’ automobiles, Jasmine was picked up early every Sunday morning by Brother Jacob, the Emanuel Baptist Church’s faithful and loyal van driver. The church van would travel to several of the neighborhood projects and pick up the children whose parents were not necessarily interested in attending church themselves. Some of the neighborhood parents may have seen a real benefit in the children attending church, while others may have seen it as free babysitting service. For Jasmine’s mother, it was the latter. Ms. Fleming had attended Emanuel in the past, but she quickly became disinterested when she felt convicted by some of the things that were said; feeling that many of the members talked about her behind her back because she was poor and didn’t dress in ‘appropriate church attire’. Maybe her feelings were based on fact or maybe it was just a figment of her imagination; her uncomfortable feelings stemming from her own sense of not measuring up. She would come on occasions - family and friend’s day and some holidays - but church was not a part of Ms. Fleming’s weekly agenda