Distorted

by Christy Barritt

  “Of course.”

  “What did Ethan mean by you wanted all kinds of women—single, taken, it didn’t matter?”

  Tennyson seemed to freeze. “You want to know the truth?”

  Mallory nodded. Of course she did. “Yes, I do. The truth is all we’ve got sometimes.”

  His features seemed to age ten years before her eyes. What exactly was he about to tell her? She sensed it was deep and heavy and full of pain.

  “Before I made SEAL Team Six, I was on a different SEAL team. We were training nationals in Iraq so they could defend themselves against the insurgents who were threatening to take control of the country.”

  Tension crawled up Mallory’s spine. Whatever he was about to announce, it was big. She could feel it, could feel that whatever happened had profoundly affected Tennyson.

  She waited for him to gather his thoughts. Resisted the urge to touch him, to comfort him. She wanted to hear what he had to say. She wanted to know him. To truly know him.

  “An admiral contacted me. Said his daughter was in the area where I was training. She was working with the CIA, and he wanted me to keep an eye on her. I wasn’t supposed to let her know that the conversation ever happened, of course. She would have been mortified.”

  This was the girl. The one whose photo Tennyson still carried with him.

  His voice softened. “Claire. The woman I told you about before. She’d graduated from Harvard. Could have done anything she wanted with her life, but she decided to work for the government. She had a passion for justice—not unlike you.”

  Tennyson offered a quick, reassuring smile.

  Mallory didn’t know where the story was going, but she could sense it was nowhere good based on Tennyson’s body language. She braced herself as he continued.

  “I got to know her. She was fascinating. We were stationed in the country for four months. Claire and I knew we were in love a week after we met the first time. Our feelings were that intense. We saw each other whenever we could.”

  Something about his words caused pangs in Mallory’s heart. Did he feel that way about her also? Was there even room in his heart to try to love someone like he’d loved Claire? That was a question and thought for pondering at another time.

  “The rebel group who was trying to overthrow the government continued to attack US troops,” Tennyson said. “Their weapons were high-grade, beyond what they would have gotten off the streets. It became obvious that someone was supplying them with the necessary gear to overthrow the government.”

  She knew where this was going, but she wasn’t sure she wanted to hear the rest. However, she couldn’t stop herself. She had to know. No matter how much it hurt or tore her up inside.

  “Claire figured out that Dante Torres was the man behind it all. He was smuggling the weapons into the country somehow. She got a lead on a new shipment that was coming in, but she had to prove it was real.” He dipped his head a moment—but only a moment—before focusing intensely on the road ahead of them. “I begged her not to go.”

  “And?” Mallory pressed her lips together, waiting to hear the rest.

  “She told me she wouldn’t. Not without backup. I mean, that was her job. It was what she was hired to do.” He drew in a deep breath. “She told me to meet her one evening. Our relationship was all under wraps. She was undercover. I was a military man in a country where a lot of people hated Americans. It was no time for love. All of our meetings were in secret.”

  “What happened?” Mallory hardly wanted to ask the question.

  “She asked me to meet her just to throw me off her trail.” His voice cracked. “She never showed up. She never had any intentions of doing so. I’ll never know her exact reasons, but I suspect she wanted to keep me out of danger.”

  “What was she doing in the meantime?”

  “She went to gather intelligence about the arms deal. I figured out where she was going and rushed to help her. I was going to stay in the distance, make sure she didn’t even know I was there. But make sure she was safe.”

  Her heart pounded in her ears as she waited for the conclusion of his story. She knew where this was going—she could feel it in her gut—but she wanted to hear it anyway.

  “I arrived just in time to see Dante Torres pull his trigger. Claire had been made somehow. Torres wasn’t about to let her escape knowing what she did.”

  Dante. He truly was an evil man. A man who’d deserved more justice than he’d gotten when he killed himself. She reached across the seat and rested her hand on his shoulder.

  “I’m so sorry, Tennyson.”

  His jaw hardened. “I was going to shoot Torres right then and there. But everything went black.”

  “What happened?”

  “Ethan Stone showed up.”

  “Ethan Ethan? The same Ethan who was in our hotel suite?”

  He nodded. “He was working for the CIA. The two of us never liked each other. Probably because we were both in love with Claire. He knew if I pulled the trigger then, all their work would be destroyed. They needed to bring these guys down the legal way—not by route of a rogue Navy SEAL pulling the trigger.”

  “I never heard about any of this.”

  “CIA. There’s no glory, per se. Claire became a nameless star on the memorial wall in Langley.”

  “Her father?”

  “He’s never forgiven me. I can’t say I blame him.”

  She squeezed his shoulder, fighting the desire to pull him into her arms and tell him everything would be okay. They were in the car. She couldn’t do that. But she longed to make things better. To comfort him. To help carry his burden, just like he’d helped to carry hers.

  “It wasn’t your fault. She did everything she could to keep the fact that she was going there from you.”

  He nodded slowly, his gaze still fixed on the road. “I know. But I beat myself up for years. All I could think about was getting vengeance—I called it justice back then—on Dante Torres.”

  “You have just as much reason to hate him as I do.”

  “But hate can consume you. It can make you a prisoner.”

  “Yes it can.” She knew his words were true, but hearing them out loud only drove the point home.

  She didn’t want Dante or his men to have any more control of her life ever again. Ever.

  Tennyson watched as the landscape changed from tree-dotted farmland to stretches of nothing but open sky on the horizon. They’d arrive at their destination soon.

  Part of him wanted this trip to continue. Something seemed to have shifted between him and Mallory on the way here. Their conversation had bonded them.

  He hadn’t told that story about Claire to anyone since it happened. Wheaton knew parts of it. But sharing it with Mallory had felt right.

  As had touching her. Holding hands. Feeling her hand on his shoulder.

  They passed through the gate and pulled up to Trident headquarters. She would be safe here. For a while, at least.

  “So this is where I’ll be spending a fair amount of time, huh?” Mallory leaned forward to get a better look at the building.

  Trident’s headquarters was located on twenty-five acres off the Chesapeake Bay. Part of the land had been used for farming up until Wheaton had purchased it. Right on the other side of the property was a separate parcel where the guys going through the program would live while they were in training.

  It was an old hotel—only a decade old, actually. The building was surprisingly modern for the area: rectangular, industrial, artistic almost. The previous owner had tried to make a go of it as a hotel for several years, but had ultimately given up because there hadn’t been enough business here.

  Tennyson nodded and put the car in park. “I think you’ll like it here. There’s something about the water that can soothe the spirit. It’s soothed mine, at least.”

  “This isn’t far from Hope House, is it?”

  “No, it’s not. Right down the street.” Tennyson turned toward her before she could j
oin the others who were getting out of their cars. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

  She didn’t answer right away, and he actually appreciated the forethought she was giving his question. He didn’t want an easy answer such as an obligatory “fine.” He wanted the truth.

  “I don’t know what I am right now, Tennyson. All I can think about is going back to the life I ‘lived’ in captivity for that year. It wasn’t really living at all. I feel like I’m close—so close—to going back to that dark place. I can taste it. My body can sense it.”

  “I can only imagine what you’re feeling.”

  The sun hit her face, giving her an almost angelic look that Tennyson drank in. She was so beautiful—inside and out. She didn’t deserve any of the things that had been thrown at her.

  “I’ve really tried to believe that everything that’s happened has just been a terrible mistake or that the person behind these so-called threats was just socially awkward or cluelessly trying to play a prank. I don’t know. It was probably naive of me. I’ve always had a tendency to want to stick my head in the sand rather than face reality.”

  His heart yearned to help her—to really help her. To sweep her away from all of this—forever. But he couldn’t do that. His feelings for Mallory were growing, but he was hired help. Besides, he couldn’t lose his focus on keeping her safe. “Is having your head in the sand your coping mechanism?”

  She nodded. “Yeah, I guess you could say that. It’s not a very good one. But I can’t ignore everything that’s happening. It would be foolish of me. This is more than a prank or someone taunting me. I realize that my life is on the line.”

  He remained quiet, listening.

  “I guess I’m tired of living like the freedom I have could slip away at any minute. It’s no way to live.”

  “Maybe we can help you get part of your life back here, Mallory. I’ll support whatever choice you make, but I really feel like it would be best if you laid low for a while. At least until we figure out a few things.”

  “We have a lot to figure out.” She reached for his hand and squeezed it. “Tennyson, if you hadn’t come along yesterday . . .”

  “Shh . . . don’t think like that.”

  “I can’t help but think like that. You’ve been a real lifesaver more than once.”

  “You’re worth saving . . . however many times it takes.”

  Their gazes caught, and Tennyson felt his stomach squeeze with feelings he hadn’t felt in a long time.

  “Let’s get you inside,” Tennyson said, his voice hoarse and tight.

  She nodded.

  That’s when he realized he was still grasping her hand. She hadn’t pulled away or looked startled. Holding her hand had felt so natural that he’d hardly noticed.

  Again, he reminded himself to keep himself in check.

  How many times would he have to remind himself of that?

  CHAPTER 28

  “This is where you’ll be staying.” Tennyson opened the door to a small, dorm-like room. A little bed was tucked against the wall, as well as a dresser, small sofa, and desk.

  None of this was ideal. She wanted to be on the road, not sequestered away. This was temporary, she reminded herself. A bump in the road.

  “I’ll be staying on the other side,” Tennyson continued. “There’s actually a bathroom connecting the two rooms, just in case you need anything. Logan and Kori are staying in the rooms across the hall, and Grant will be on the other side of you. He’s downstairs talking to Wheaton right now, but he said he’d be up in a few.”

  As she looked at Tennyson, she remembered the moment they’d shared in the car and her cheeks warmed. It was so simple. Just holding hands. But to Mallory, it felt like moving a mountain—a huge leap of faith. Was there room in her life for a man? Did Tennyson even share her feelings?

  Flutters rippled through her when she brought her eyes up to meet his. “Sounds good, Tennyson.”

  The smolder in his glance made her catch her breath. Did he even realize the effect he had on her when he looked like that? When his gaze was filled with so much care and concern?

  He stepped back, almost as if he felt something too but didn’t want to. “The premises are guarded. I’m sure you saw the fence as we passed. It’s hard for anyone who hasn’t been approved to get on campus.”

  “It sounds like quite the setup.” The words sounded lame, not what she wanted to say. But it was all that would come out.

  “It will be great once we open. They’re still doing some construction on the other end of the building. But this hallway is secure.”

  Mallory walked across the room and shoved the curtain aside. Glimmering water stared back at her, as peaceful and serene as Mallory hoped her soul would be one day. “So nice to have a view of the bay.”

  Tennyson stood behind her, close enough that she could feel his body heat. Close enough that desire welled in her. That if she just turned around, they’d be face-to-face . . .

  But Mallory didn’t allow herself to do that. There were still professional boundaries in place. There were still doubts, uncertainties, and so many obstacles to overcome.

  “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” Tennyson murmured.

  “It really is. I think I could stare at it all day.” The endless expanse of horizon, the gentle ripples across the blue water, the blue sky that seemed to promise hope . . . maybe this was the place that would truly help heal her bruised and battered soul.

  “I was hoping you might feel relaxed here,” Tennyson said.

  Mallory couldn’t help but turn toward him. His gaze met hers, and something simmered between them. His pupils widened as his eyes moved to her lips. They’d done this dance. Two steps forward. Two steps back. Pulled together. Drawn apart. They’d be fools to think this would work between them, wouldn’t they?

  They were from different worlds. She was damaged, made whole again only through her faith. He was a man who could do no wrong.

  Up on a pedestal? Absolutely. The worst place to be, in many ways. Because no one ever stayed up there for long.

  Despite everything Mallory knew, they stepped closer to each other.

  Did he want to kiss her? Because she wanted to kiss him.

  At just that moment, someone burst into the room.

  Mallory and Tennyson both jumped back from each other.

  Grant.

  “We got another e-mail from Nameless,” he announced, oblivious to whatever had almost happened. “You’ll want to see this.”

  Tennyson reread the words, his gut churning with each new phrase.

  YOU THINK YOU CAN HIDE, BUT YOU CAN’T. YOU THINK YOU CAN RUN, BUT YOU CAN’T. WHEREVER YOU GO, I’LL FIND YOU.

  YOU’RE MEANT FOR ME AND ONLY ME. DON’T EVER BELIEVE DIFFERENTLY. IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT ANYONE ELSE SAYS. IT DOESN’T MATTER HOW YOU THINK OR FEEL. THE TRUTH IS THE TRUTH, AND I’M DETERMINED TO PROVE IT TO YOU.

  BE WAITING, MY DEAR. BE WATCHING, DOLL. NO ONE KNOWS THE DAY OR HOUR WE’LL BE REUNITED—NO ONE EXCEPT ME.

  “He used ‘doll,’” Tennyson said. A rock formed in his gut. Were the answers under their nose the whole time? Was Grant behind this?

  He’d never respected the man, but he didn’t think he’d sink this low either. Nor was he this stupid.

  Grant raised his hands, his eyes wide and flabbergasted. “I get that it’s weird, but it wasn’t me. I can promise you that. Why would I show you this e-mail if I knew it would incriminate me? I’m smarter than that.”

  “Maybe this guy is someone who’s closer than you think,” Logan said. He and Kori had followed Grant into the room only seconds later. “He knows enough to know Grant calls Mallory doll.”

  “We should be able to narrow our list of suspects based on that information,” Kori said.

  “He’s definitely taken the threat to the next level,” Grant said. “I hope this little minifortress can offer us some peace, because this is getting downright creepy. I’m going to call Agent Turner and every detective we’
ve talked to. I’m going to demand answers. Enough is enough.”

  Mallory sank into the desk chair, looking unusually pale. “Does that mean he knows where I am? He mentioned running and hiding.”

  “Not necessarily,” Tennyson said, resisting the urge to comfort her. “We can stay here for a while and we should be okay. Plus, the location is secure. I checked, and no one followed us.”

  “This guy is a nut job!” Grant paced to the window, looking more stressed than Tennyson thought was possible.

  None of this was helping to calm Mallory. The tension was getting to everyone, it appeared, and the room felt like a pressure cooker.

  “Is Nameless connected to Sanchez and the incidents that have been taking place?” Mallory’s wide eyes were desperate for answers as her shoulders slumped. “All along I suspected they could be connected, but I didn’t want to believe it.”

  Tennyson wished he could give those answers to her.

  “It’s hard to say,” Tennyson said. “Like Grant said, we need to contact law enforcement. Enough has happened that they need to move these incidents up higher on their priority lists. I hope this guy will mess up and someone will be able to track his IP address. No one is flawless when it comes to this stuff.”

  Mallory turned toward Grant. “Have you called all the places where we were supposed to stop on the tour? How are they handling the change of schedule?”

  Grant turned from the window. “They’re not happy of course. But they understand.”

  “What reason are you telling them?” Tennyson asked.

  “I’m telling them that an unexpected emergency has come up. The publisher isn’t happy—they were counting on this book for a boost in sales.”

  “There are more important things at stake here than book sales,” Tennyson snapped.

  “I didn’t say otherwise.” Grant glared at him. “But Mallory needs to know the stakes. This is her nonprofit. Her future.”

  “So, what’s the plan? Just stay locked away here indefinitely?” Mallory asked. Her shoulders were a little straighter. She’d processed this new information and was now pushing forward.

  It was just one more thing that Tennyson admired about her.