Return to Me

by Jill Sanders

  When he drove up, he saw the closed sign in the window and frowned. Glancing at his watch, he saw it was after three. He’d meant to get here earlier in the day, but he’d been too busy chopping down the rhododendron bushes in front of his parents’ house.

  At least he’d finally gotten the place looking like a house instead of a jungle. But now that the house was visible, he could see it needed a fresh coat of paint as well as new shingles on the roof.

  Sighing, he was about to pull out of the parking spot when he glanced over at the grocery store and saw Becca standing in line to check out.

  Jumping out, he dashed across the street in the light rain that had caused him to stop all the outside work for the day.

  When he walked into the grocery store, he noticed that Patty O’Neil was checking Becca out. Instantly, he wished he’d waited outside for her to come out.

  “Well, look at who finally comes back,” Patty said loudly. “Bout time you made it in here.” She smiled and waved him over. When he stepped close to her, she gave him a big hug.

  “It’s good to see you again, Patty.” He hugged her back. The woman had gotten smaller since the last time he’d seen her. “Are you on some sort of miracle diet? I swear you’re half the woman you used to be.” He smiled at her.

  She laughed and patted her hair back into place. “Well, listen to you, Mr. Smooth Talker.” She winked at Becca, who smiled. “I have been going down to the Boys and Girls Club, working out with a bunch of other ladies. They do aerobic swimming classes there now.”

  “Well, you look wonderful.” And the truth was, she did. She not only looked half the size, but almost half the age.

  “I was just telling Becca, here, about how we’re meeting three times a week now.” She turned back and continued to scan Becca’s items.

  He noticed there were a great deal of frozen dinner boxes in her cart and frowned a little.

  “Well, what brings you down our way?” Patty asked as she swiped Becca’s credit card.

  He nodded to Becca. “I was hoping the bakery was still open.”

  Becca shook her head. “We close at three. We’re open again at five tomorrow.”

  “Five? In the morning?” He frowned. “Since I’ve been back, I’ve made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t step foot out of bed before six.” He smiled.

  “I bet you’re enjoying it,” Patty said, handing Becca back her card and the receipt.

  Sean took two of Becca’s bags. “I’ll help you out. See you later, Patty.”

  “Such a gentlemen.” Patty smiled and waved them off as she started checking out the next person in line.

  “You don’t have to…” Becca started, frowning at him as she grabbed up the other bag.

  “It’s no problem.” He pushed open the door and held it wide for her to step through. He looked around. “Where’s your car?”

  “Over there.” She nodded down the street. “But, I’m not going to it. I’m up here now.” She nodded towards the stairs.

  He glanced up at the apartment above the store. “You’re living there? What happened to your house?”

  “My mother sold it and moved to Rio full time.”

  He frowned as he followed her up the stairs. He couldn’t imagine living on his own, going through everything she had all by herself.

  At the top of the stairs, she turned and reached out for the bags.

  “I’ll help you inside. I have something for you.” He watched her eyes sadden. She nodded her head and opened the door.

  The apartment was nicer than he’d expected. The view from the second story windows was breathtaking. The buildings in front were lower, and you could see the water from there.

  “I bet that’s a killer view on a clear day.” He set her bags down on the counter and nodded towards the windows.

  “One of the reasons I’ve stayed here.” She sighed and started removing boxes of frozen meals from the bags. She placed them in her freezer as he watched.

  “Is that all you eat?” He nodded to the meals.

  “Hmm,” she said as she loaded up her freezer.

  “That stuff can’t be good for you.” He reached over and took a box from her. “I mean, just look at all this stuff they put in here.” He started reading off the ingredients.

  She leaned back and crossed her arms over her chest and watched him.

  “It’s these or starve.” She took the box from him and set it in the freezer with the rest.

  He shook his head. “I can teach you how to cook. There are a few basic meals you should know how to make.” He walked over and opened her cupboards. They were pretty much bare.

  “What are you doing?” She stood back as he opened her refrigerator.

  “Looking for something to eat.”

  She chuckled. “Are you hungry?”

  He stopped and looked over at her. “Yeah, aren’t you?”

  She shook her head. “It’s three thirty in the afternoon.”

  He shrugged his shoulders and pulled out the chicken she’d just put in the fridge. “It will be an hour before this is done.” He held up the chicken. “I may have to run downstairs for a few more things.” He frowned and set the chicken on her countertop. “Don’t move.”

  He didn’t even give her time to respond. Instead, he headed back downstairs and spent the next fifteen minutes shopping for items he would need to make his Italian chicken.

  Patty may have a small store, but she prided herself on carrying some of the best organic vegetables and fruits around. He could get lost in the variety. He’d missed shopping and cooking while he’d been away.

  As he carried two more full bags up the stairs, he opened the door without knocking and smiled when Becca was still standing in the kitchen, looking down at the chicken.

  “What are you doing?” she asked, stepping aside.

  “Making us dinner,” he said, pulling items from the bags and setting what he would need on the large cutting board she had sitting out.

  She leaned against the large island and shook her head. “Why?”

  He stopped, turned, and looked at her. “Because I’m hungry and the thought of you eating frozen dinners up here alone drives me mad.”

  She nodded her head slowly and then walked around and sat at a bar stool.

  “Oh, no.” He shook his head and moved over and took her shoulders and walked her back into the kitchen. “You’re going to help.”

  “I can’t cook. I’ll burn—”

  He chuckled. “Can you cut up vegetables without cutting off a digit?”

  She nodded.

  “Good, then grab a knife and cut these up.”

  “All of them?” Her eyes got huge when she saw the large pile of vegetables in front of her.

  Chapter Three

  Becca had to admit, chopping vegetables gave her a little satisfaction. She occasionally glanced over to see what Sean was doing. He was making some sort of sauce and putting it and the chicken in one of the large glass pans her sister had given her. When she was done with all the vegetables, he scooped them into the pan with the chicken and placed it all in her oven.

  “There. Now we wait.” He glanced down at his watch. “Plenty of time to have a beer.” From her fridge, he pulled out two cans that he’d bought downstairs. Handing one to her, he popped his open. “You know, this is one of the things I missed the most.” He took a deep drink of his beer.

  “Beer?” She frowned down at her drink. She liked beer. The fact that he’d bought her favorite brand had her a little unnerved, especially since she remembered it had been Nick’s favorite too.

  “No, cooking.” He took her hand and walked her to the sofa. “Sit.” He nodded and sat after she had.

  “You enjoy cooking?” She shifted and got a little more comfortable.

  He nodded. “I know, right?” He chuckled. “Nick always made fun of me about it.” He shook his head and took another drink of beer. “That was until he tasted what I’m making us now.”

  “It�
��s that good?” She chuckled when he nodded and gave her a lopsided smile.

  “Yeah, I perfected it in high school Home-Ec classes. One of the main reasons Skyler started dating me.”

  Becca stilled when she heard the name. “How is Skyler? I haven’t heard from her in a while.”

  He shrugged his shoulders and took another drink. Then his eyes went to her windows as the rain started coming down harder.

  “We broke things off a while back,” he said. She couldn’t gauge his mood, since his eyes were focused on the rain.

  “I’m sorry,” she said and set her half-empty beer down.

  He shook his head. “Don’t be. I never should have proposed to her.”

  Her eyebrows shot up. “Why not?”

  He chuckled a little and glanced sideways at her. “You know why.”

  For a moment, Becca’s heart skipped, not fully understanding him.

  “She could never be faithful to anyone. I thought that she would settle down after graduation.” He shook his head and took another sip of his beer. “From the sound of things, she actually got wilder.”

  Becca nodded. “I’ve heard. I’m sorry.”

  He shrugged his shoulders and set his beer down. “I have something for you.” He frowned. “It’s out in my car.” He glanced towards the windows again.

  “You can get it when the rain lets up.” She leaned back and tucked her legs under herself.

  “I like your place.” He nodded around. “How long have you been here?”

  “Almost six months.”

  “Do you like living right in town?”

  She shrugged her shoulders. “It has its perks. I can walk to work and the grocery store.” She smiled. “Saves on gas. Plus, Patty gives me a great deal on the rent.”

  “I’ll need to look for a place of my own.” He shook his head. “Not that I don’t like staying with my folks, but it’s time.” He leaned back and propped his foot on his knee.

  “There are a few apartments for rent in the Meadows.” She frowned when he cringed. “They fixed the places up last year. Remodeled over half of them. They’re really nice now.”

  “I might swing by.” He sighed. “But to be honest, I was hoping to buy a house. I have some money saved up and, with a VA loan for the rest, I think I could find something I could fix up.”

  She reached for her beer again. “There are a lot of older places for sale in town. Or were you thinking of something out by your folks’ place?”

  He shook his head and watched her. “I hadn’t thought about it that far.”

  “I know what you mean. After…” She took another sip just to swallow the pain. “After Nick, I didn’t know what I was going to do. I can’t imagine coming back after what you’ve been through.”

  His eyes went back to her windows as the rain continued. “I should have planned more. Maybe I should have stayed in the military.”

  She set her drink down and leaned back again. “Is that what you want?”

  His eyes moved to hers and it took a while for him to shake his head no. “I don’t know what I want for now. Does that make me bad?”

  She shook her head. “No! Absolutely not. You have your whole life ahead of you now. Take your time and don’t let anyone pressure you into making a decision too soon.”

  His lips curled up a little. When his hand reached out to brush the tips of her hair, she held her breath.

  “Thanks.” He surprised her by quickly standing up. “I’d better check the food.”

  When he moved into the kitchen, she closed her eyes and tried to steady her breathing. She didn’t know why she had jumped at his featherlight touch.

  “Almost done,” he said from behind her. “The rain has let up some; I’ll go grab the box from my car.” She heard the door shut behind him.

  She nodded, not taking her eyes off the large windows. The sky was still dark and gray, but she could tell that the rain had let up a little. Her place was starting to smell wonderful.

  For a moment, she let her mind wander to what it would be like to be with another man. Someone like Sean. She’d never been with anyone other than Nick and didn’t think she’d know how to act if someone showed signs of being attracted to her.

  She’d never been good at flirting. There had been no need with Nick. She knew life had to go on, and in the last few months, she’d started believing that there was someone else out there for her.

  She didn’t think Nick would want her to continue living life mourning him. After all, she was only twenty-two. Way too young to write romance and falling in love off her list forever.

  Sean opened the door and stepped inside. He shook his head, letting the raindrops fall from his dark hair. As she watched him, she couldn’t stop herself from comparing him to Nick.

  Nick had been smaller and had lighter hair. His blue eyes had been one of her favorite features. Looking over at Sean, she saw his dark eyes watching her.

  “Are you okay?” he asked as he set a large box on her table.

  She nodded her head slightly as he removed his jacket. His shirt had gotten a little wet from the rain and her eyes went to the toned muscles that ran down his arms.

  Nick had never had those, either. Of course, the last time she’d seen him, they had been kids, really. She sighed, not realizing her eyes were still on Sean’s arms and chest.

  “If you want, we can wait and open this after we eat.”

  She glanced up at his eyes and for a moment, she forgot what he was talking about. Then she looked down at the large box and frowned.

  Nick’s things were in there. Pain shot through her. She nodded her head. She didn’t think she’d be able to eat after seeing what was in there.

  “If you want to set the table, I’ll get everything else ready,” Sean said, motioning towards the table.

  She stood up and walked over to the kitchen without a word. Her eyes kept moving back to the box like something was going to jump out of it.

  She was thankful when he moved it to her coffee table.

  When they sat down at the table, she had to admit, the food not only smelled good, it looked great. He’d arranged everything on the plates and the chicken, noodles, and vegetables looked more like art than food.

  “Well?” He smiled over at her. “Are you going to try it?”

  She smiled. “I was just thinking that if I took a picture of this, I could hang it on my wall and enjoy it longer.”

  He smiled. “Presentation is part of the package.”

  She picked up her fork and took a bite. Her eyes closed and she tried not to moan at the wonderful tastes.

  *******

  It was pure torture watching Becca eat. He didn’t know what had caused him to wonder what it would be like to kiss her. But once he started, he couldn’t stop.

  His eyes took in everything. How she looked at him. How her tongue darted out to lick the sauce from her lips. He was quickly losing his mind and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

  He tried to focus on his dinner, but the fact was, he’d lost his appetite—for food, anyway.

  “I thought you were hungry?” she asked, glancing at him. He nodded and tried to refocus on the meal. Even the cold beer did little to calm him.

  Once both of their plates were empty, she stood up and took them to the sink. “That was the best meal I’ve had in a long time. Well…” She glanced back at him. “Since the last time I ate the Golden Oar, that is.” She smiled.

  “I’m glad you liked it. You’ve got to start eating better. Those frozen meals will kill you.” He shook his head. She frowned a little. “I can teach you, if you like?”

  She chuckled. “My sister tried.” She leaned back against the countertop. “Even my mother gave up on trying.”

  He smiled and carried his empty beer over and set it in the trash can. He watched her eyes zero in on the box he’d set on her coffee table.

  “I can stick around, if you want?”

  Her eyes went back to his quickly. “I’d
like that. I know it’s probably childish of me…”

  He shook his head and walked over to her, taking her shoulders in his hands. “Some things you shouldn’t do alone.”

  She nodded and when her eyes met his, he thought he saw confusion.

  Then she stepped away and walked over to sit on the sofa again. He followed her and pulled the box closer to them.

  When she lifted the lid, she sighed a little. Sean hadn’t looked inside the box. It had taken most of his willpower to hold onto Nick’s stuff for over a year. This box had been marked with Becca’s name and had been found at the bottom of Nick’s footlocker.

  She pulled out a Special Forces T-shirt, held it up to her face, and took a deep breath.

  “I had forgotten…” She closed her eyes and took another breath. “I’d forgotten what he smelled like.” Her tears started to fall and knew there would probably be more before she was done.

  “I always remembered him smelling like gym class.” He chuckled as she smiled.

  “After you two would play basketball during the summer…” She smiled. “I swear I never knew boys could stink so much.” She chuckled as he smiled. Then she took another smell of his shirt and set it down.

  When she pulled out a framed picture of Nick and her, her eyes watered again. “You took this picture,” she said, nodding at it.

  He remembered. They had driven down to Haystack beach and spent the day collecting shells and digging for clams. Nick’s arm was thrown around Becca’s shoulders. They had huge smiles on their faces. Sean could hardly remember ever being that happy, except when he’d been with them.

  “That was a great day.” His smile felt forced as he felt his heart dive a little. Nick was gone. It still felt like a bad dream.

  “What is this?” She held up a sealed brown envelope.

  He shook his head. “I didn’t go through his things.”

  She set the picture down on the coffee table and opened the envelope. Her frown grew and for a moment, he began to worry.

  “This…” She shook her head. “This can’t be right.”

  “What?” He moved closer to her. “What is it?”

  “It looks like an online itinerary with prepaid passes.” She held up two passes as she looked over a bundle of papers stapled together.