by David Warner
‘Mr Mudge?’ Tay had her hand up. ‘I . . .’
Mudge shook his head sadly. ‘Tay, no doubt you’re feeling sorry for Warner, but he deserves everything he gets. He’ll never learn, otherwise. So I don’t want to hear any more about it.’
He peered around the room. ‘I’m sure someone else could take Warner’s place in Friday’s game. Any volunteers?’
Bella Ferosi’s hand shot up. ‘I’m an excellent cricketer, Mr Mudge,’ she said. ‘I’ve never joined the cricket team because I’m the netball captain, as everyone knows.’ She looked around the room, searching for confirmation. ‘But we have a bye in netball this week, so I’d be happy to captain the cricket team.’
Grinning maliciously, Mudge looked across at Sunil. ‘Well, I’ll suggest that to Ms Maro,’ he said. ‘I’m sure she’d be happy to give you a turn as cricket captain, Bella. It’s good to allow others the opportunity to shine, don’t you agree, Deep?’
Davey eyed Sunil. His friend had that zombie look again. Sunil was proud to be captain of both the school team and their club team, the Sandhill Sluggers, and he had every right to be – he was a great captain, even if he did sometimes let slip the odd word or two to the other side.
Bella, on the other hand, was the bossiest person Davey had ever met. A cricket team with Bella and Mo in it was a team Davey would never want to join. He shook his head in despair.
‘Don’t worry, Shorty,’ Mo whispered. ‘I’ll take care of those Batfish.’ He giggled. ‘You can count on me.’
CHAPTER 7
TRAINING TRAUMA
‘Just because you can’t play doesn’t mean you can’t come to training.’ Sunil had his arm around Davey’s shoulder as they rounded the toilet block and headed across C playground.
‘Yeah, same as me,’ Kevin said. ‘I’m still going to training. It’s better than sitting around doing nothing.’
They reached the cricket pitch. Some of the team were already there, but Ms Maro was yet to arrive.
‘What about Bella?’ Davey was in a funk. ‘They can’t make her captain!’
‘Nah, that’ll never happen.’ Sunil sounded his usual happy self. ‘I’ll eat Mo’s stinky hat if they make Bella captain.’
Davey was about to make Sunil shake on it – bets like these always cheered him up – when someone called out his name.
‘Davey!’
He turned. Tay Tui was running towards them with Ivy Mundine close behind.
‘I’m so sorry, bro!’ Tay was panting. ‘I tried to tell Mr Mudge again just now, but he still wouldn’t listen. It was like he didn’t really want to know . . .’
‘He didn’t. He’s always like that.’ Ivy frowned. ‘It’s bad luck, though. And now look who’s coming.’ She pointed.
They turned to see. Bella had just rounded the toilet block and was striding towards them. She was carrying a bat. When she saw them staring, she waved. ‘Hi, everyone! You ready to get stuck in?’
‘Don’t tell me . . .’ This time Sunil looked as if a vampire had drained his whole body of blood. Even the tips of his hair looked grey.
Bella paused to catch her breath, then put one hand on her hip. ‘So, I’m thinking we’ll start with some warm-ups, then we’ll do ten laps of the playground. Then I’ll practise my bowling while Tay and George bat. Sunil, you’ll be wicket-keeper –’
‘Um . . .’
Davey had never seen Sunil at a loss for words. There was always going to be a first time, though.
‘Um . . . Um . . . Ah . . .’
‘So, let’s start with some stretches.’ Bella dropped the bat she was holding. ‘Everyone space out and do what I do.’ She stood with her feet apart, took a deep breath and raised her arms.
No one moved. She stopped to look around.
Davey glanced at Sunil and stifled a laugh. The situation was so desperate it was funny. Sunil tried not to smile.
‘Come on, guys! Let’s get to it!’ Bella reached up high then swung low, turning as she went, so her fingertips brushed her toes. She reversed the action. ‘Now the other way. Davey? Sunil? Ivy?’
Still no one budged.
‘Good to see you guys have started already! Well done!’ Ms Maro was rushing towards them. The rest of the team were running behind, carrying the gear.
Bella turned. ‘Ah, Ms Maro, you’ve made it at last.’ She waited for the teacher and the other kids to reach them.
‘Ms Maro, since I’m captain this week, I’d be happy to run the training. I’m a very good leader.’ Bella smiled, then turned back to the cricketers, who now stood with their arms crossed.
‘Thanks. That’s a lovely offer.’ Ms Maro smiled and patted the school captain on the back. ‘But Sunil Deep is already team captain.’
‘Mr Mudge said I could be!’ Bella suddenly sounded like a four-year-old who’d been told Christmas was cancelled. ‘He said it was time to give someone else an opportunity to shine – which I happen to be good at.’ She gave her ponytail a flick. ‘Shining, I mean.’
Ms Maro put her arm around Bella’s shoulder, a look of sympathy on her face. ‘Yes, I talked to Mr Mudge about that, and we agreed that perhaps this week was not the right week to change captain. If you’d like to join the team, that’s great, but Sunil’s our captain, isn’t he, guys?’
‘Yeah!’ everyone shouted, punching the air in relief.
‘No!’ It was Mo. He’d sneaked up behind them.
‘Mo, you’ve always got a funny line to keep us laughing!’ Ms Maro shook her head in amusement. ‘Now, let’s get to it!’
Bella put her hands on her hips and frowned. ‘I only joined on the condition that I be captain. I need to lead, Ms Maro, not follow.’
‘Sorry, Bella,’ Ms Maro said firmly. ‘But I have to put the team first, and on this occasion that means keeping things as they are.’
Bella flicked her ponytail so hard Davey thought it might fly off. ‘In that case, I’d better go. I have important duties to attend to.’ With that, the school captain marched off across the playground.
‘Looks like Bella won’t be playing after all,’ Sunil said quietly to Davey. ‘Shame.’
‘Yeah. Oh well . . .’ Davey had to admit Ms Maro was a lot cleverer than she looked.
Ms Maro clapped her hands. ‘So, let’s get started.’
She looked over at Tay. The new girl had pulled a packet of Whopper Chomps out of her pocket and was about to extract a lolly from it. ‘Tay, no lollies while we’re training.’
Tay looked up in surprise. ‘Sorry, Miss,’ she said. She glanced at Ivy Mundine, who was standing right beside her. It seemed the two girls had become friends.
‘You’re my one, my on-l-y-y-y-y-y . . .’ Tay sang.
‘B-a-a-a-b-y-y-y-y,’ Ivy sang in response. The girls burst out laughing.
Oh no, thought Davey. Now Tay had Ivy doing it. Where would it end?
Ms Maro frowned. ‘Save your singing for choir, girls.’ She turned to look at Davey. ‘Mr Warner, I hear you won’t be playing on Friday? That’s a shame.’
‘Yeah, Mr Mudge said I was singing in class and eating Whopper Chomps, Miss. But can I still train?’
‘Of course, Davey.’ Ms Maro glanced at Tay and Ivy. The two girls had finished their Whopper Chomps and singing and were busy setting up the wickets. ‘And I might have a word to Mr Mudge.’ She smiled. ‘Now, Davey, grab Kaboom. You and George can bat first.’
Ms Maro wasn’t half as kooky as she first appeared. In fact, Davey would have gone so far as to call her the best teacher he’d ever met. Not that she had much competition, now that he thought about it.
He ran over and grabbed Kaboom. He wasn’t going to let anyone or anything stop him from playing the Batfish on Friday.
CHAPTER 8
TALKIN’ TANGO
With Bella off to attend to her ‘important duties’ and Mo under Ms Maro’s surveillance, training should have been fun. But despite repeated requests from the teacher, Tay continued to sing behind the wicket. She didn’t
even know she was doing it, Davey realised now, which made it all the more difficult to get her to stop. And once more it put Davey off his game.
And even though Ms Maro kept a close eye on Mo, the clueless cabbage still managed to wind up the entire team. One thing in particular that Mo said was so disturbing that Davey was forced to call an emergency after-school meeting of his three best friends.
He’d been standing at the crease, Kaboom in hand. Behind him, Mo was having a turn as wicket-keeper.
While Davey waited for George to bowl, and with Ms Maro well out of earshot, Mo kept up a constant stream of annoying talk. Most of it didn’t even make any sense. But it was the next thing that Mo said that got Davey really worried. ‘I’m gonna make sure those Batfish win on Friday, Shorty. Shouldn’t be too hard.’
Davey turned around to eye Mo. There was never any point replying when Mo was fired up. And if he kept quiet, Mo would let slip what he was up to.
Mo went on, his chest puffing with pride. ‘All I need to do is keep talking to their bowler on the field, let him know what I think of his style. And their fielders, and their wicket-keeper. That should do it.’ Mo smirked like a sick toad. ‘The Batfish’ll thank me after.’
So as soon as training had finished, Davey called the meeting for after school. For convenience, it was held at the corner shop, which belonged to Benny, the Sandhill Sluggers’ coach, and his wife, Barb.
‘So what’s all this about, Warner?’ Sunil looked serious.
‘Clouter’s planning to put the Batfish off their play so we forfeit the game.’
‘How do you know?’ Kevin looked sceptical.
‘He told me. He’s going to say things to them when they’re fielding.’
‘Well, that’s it,’ Sunil said firmly. ‘We’ve got to get him out of the team.’
‘And while we’re at it, can we do something about Tay Tui?’ Davey knew Tay was good behind the wicket, but something had to be done.
‘What do you mean?’ Sunil looked confused. ‘She’s pretty good. And she likes Whopper Chomps, which is handy.’
‘Yeah, but she sings all day. That horrible B4U song. It’s driving me mad!’
The other three boys shook their heads. ‘Yeah, that song really sucks,’ George said.
‘It’s a shocker.’ Kevin sighed.
‘Sure is.’ Sunil looked thoughtful for a moment. He snapped his fingers. ‘Got it! Tay can’t sing if she’s sucking a Whopper Chomp. So we load her up with them every time we play.’ He looked around at his friends. ‘We’ll have to pool our money for this. Do it for the team, okay?’
They all nodded. It was such a simple but clever plan. Sunil really was a genius, Davey decided.
‘But what about Clouter?’ Davey knew this wasn’t going to be an easy one.
Sunil snapped his fingers again. ‘Easy! We send him to another cricket ground. We’ll just tell him it’s over at Shimmer Bay Park. By the time he finds out, we’ll have finished the game.’ Sunil smiled and tapped his head.
‘Mmmm, not sure,’ Kevin said.
‘Why?’ George asked. ‘Sounds like a good plan to me.’
‘No, it won’t work,’ Davey said. ‘Ms Maro’s already told us it’s a home Batfish game, so Clouter will smell a rat if we tell him it’s changed.’
Sunil’s smile faded. He shrugged. ‘Yeah, maybe you’re right. But we’ve got to do something. In the meantime, everyone needs to put in money so we can buy a shedload of Whopper Chomps for Tay. Now!’
The boys all made a show of emptying their pockets. Sunil waited, his arms folded, until they’d coughed up everything they had. Then he added it all up on the counter.
Benny watched from behind his newspaper. ‘You boys having a party?’ he said when Sunil pushed the pile of coins towards him.
‘Nah, someone else will be, though. Give us six packs of Whopper Chomps please, Benny. That should do it.’
Davey watched as the money changed hands and Sunil pocketed the lolly packets. ‘Don’t go sampling them, Deep,’ he said. ‘We’re going to need every single one of those.’
Sunil smiled so his dimple showed. ‘You can trust me. Now, what about Clouter?’
‘We could tell Ms Maro what he said.’ George looked uncertain. It wasn’t a solution any of them would usually consider. ‘Never tell, never worry,’ was their motto.
The other boys shook their heads. Even though Mo was a pugnacious pest, they wouldn’t go so far as to tell on him.
‘No point dragging in teachers. Takes all the fun out of it.’ Sunil grimaced.
‘I think we just have to make sure McNab and Warner play,’ George said. ‘Clouter’s only a reserve. So if they can play, he’ll have to sit out.’
‘But couldn’t he call out from the sidelines?’ Now Kevin was doing the thinking.
Davey shook his head. ‘He’ll be sitting next to Ms Maro. He won’t be able to.’
Sunil looked around at his friends. ‘So tonight, we all need to come up with a plan to make sure McNab gets out of the dance thing and Mudge lets Warner play. How hard can it be?’
Everyone shook hands. But later, as Davey rode home on his old bike, with Max trotting along beside him, he couldn’t help thinking it could be very hard indeed. Kevin’s mum was dead keen on him dancing, and she was no pushover. And as for Mr Mudge . . .
CHAPTER 9
MARO MAGIC
Davey left for school early the next day. As soon as he arrived, he headed for Ms Maro’s classroom, where she could be found most mornings, getting things ready for the first lesson. He knocked on the open door.
Ms Maro was at her desk, marking work. She looked up and smiled. ‘Mr Warner! What brings you here?’
Davey took a few tentative steps into the classroom. ‘I – I – I was wondering whether you ended up talking to Mr Mudge.’
The teacher put her head on one side and raised her eyebrows in question.
‘About whether I can play against the Batfish tomorrow,’ Davey explained. ‘You see, I wasn’t singing or eating lollies in class. It wasn’t me.’
‘Ah!’ Ms Maro nodded knowingly. ‘I’m sure it wasn’t. I haven’t spoken to Mr Mudge yet, but I will, right now.’
She got to her feet and smiled as if she’d just seen a rainbow. ‘Mr Mudge isn’t really mean, you know, Davey. I’m sure I can talk him around.’
I’m sure you can, Davey thought. Somehow, Ms Maro seemed to always get her way. If anyone could help him get back in the team for Friday’s game against the Batfish, it was her.
With his mission accomplished, Davey headed down to C playground, where Sunil and the others were already playing cricket. Tay was behind the wicket, Sunil was at the crease and George was bowling. Ivy was also at the bowler’s end, bat in hand.
George bowled. Sunil moved forward down the pitch but his bat didn’t connect with the ball. A split second later, Tay had stumped him.
‘Out, Deep!’ Davey yelled.
Sunil stopped in his tracks, turned and gave the new wicket-keeper a little clap. ‘You’re good, Tui, really good,’ he said, nodding. He looked over at Davey. ‘Warner, you have a turn. But watch out for Tay!’
Davey pulled Kaboom out of his backpack. He wandered over and took his position at the crease. Here we go, he thought. She’ll start singing that awful song any minute.
But there was silence. Davey glanced behind him. Tay was in position, but her cheeks were bulging like a bullfrog’s.
‘How’s it going?’ Davey said as a test.
Tay nodded and made a loud sucking noise.
Davey smiled. ‘So you like those Whopper Chomps?’
Tay nodded again and gave him the thumbs-up. She grinned. Her mouth was chock-full of lollies.
She wouldn’t be doing any singing for a while, Davey decided. It solved that problem, at least temporarily. Now Davey and his friends had to work on making sure he and Kevin played in Friday’s match.
‘Ready, Warner?’ George was standing at his mark, waiting to bowl.
Davey tapped Kaboom on the ground. ‘You bet!’
For the first time all week, Davey got to bat in peace, and managed to pull off some nice shots. But soon the school bell sounded and the cricketers had to pull up stumps.
‘So, any ideas about how we can get Warner and McNab back in the team for tomorrow?’ Sunil asked as they strolled across the playground to class.
‘Yeah, I know what I’m going to do.’ Davey glanced at his friend – he knew Sunil wouldn’t like his plan.
‘What?’
‘I’m going to beg for mercy,’ Davey said. ‘I’ve already asked Ms Maro to put in a good word for me. Now I’m going to offer to polish Mudge’s lawn bowls and help out Mrs Trundle.’
Sunil frowned. ‘That’s a lame idea, Warner. Not very imaginative.’
‘Maybe, but it’s all I could come up with.’
Sunil looked disappointed. ‘Okay, give it a try.’ He glanced around at the others. ‘What about McNab? Any thoughts?’
‘I’ve got a few.’ George looked confident. ‘Kevin could let off the fire alarm at the town hall so they have to evacuate.’
Sunil shook his head. ‘But he wouldn’t get back quickly enough.’
‘I could sneak off early, before we leave to catch the bus, and then turn up to the match in disguise.’ Judging from his face, even Kevin knew it wouldn’t work.
Sunil looked unimpressed. ‘Next!’
‘Okay, I’ve got one.’ George sounded confident.
‘Yeah? What?’ Everyone was all ears.
George was about to explain when they rounded the corner of the toilet block and bumped into Mr Mudge.
‘Warner, Ms Maro tells me you’ve offered to do a few jobs around the school today in return for permission to play in the match against Batfish Beach tomorrow.’ Judging by the colour of his ears, for once the teacher wasn’t irate.
Davey nodded. ‘Yes, Sir. Anything you like.’
George and Kevin gave him a pat on the back.
‘Excellent.’ Mr Mudge crossed his arms. ‘So, at recess, you can polish the lawn bowls. At lunch, report to Mrs Trundle. There are quite a few things that need doing around her office. I’m sure she’ll find a use for you.’
