The Witch's Handbook To Catching Werewolves (Southern Single Mom Paranormal Mysteries 2)

by Amy Boyles

  I moaned. “This is horrible.” I plastered on a smile. “But the good news is that the werewolf who stole the turkey—”

  Kate lifted her arms. “Wait. Werewolf?”

  I clicked my tongue. “Yes, werewolf.”

  Vordrid sailed into the room and landed beside Dot. “A rogue werewolf if you ask me.”

  Dot raised a finger as if to add to his point. “Yes, a good pack leader wouldn’t allow a werewolf to frighten regular people.”

  “Well, I don’t know anything about who their pack leader is, but the werewolf who did it is dead.”

  Kate gasped. “Dead! Was it a turkey bone that did it? Dogs aren’t supposed to eat chicken. But I’m not sure about turkey. Seems like it would be related. If they can’t eat one, they shouldn’t be able to eat another.”

  I took a deep breath since one of us needed to breathe through the conversation. Kate had strung her sentence together so fast I was surprised her face wasn’t red from exertion.

  “Yes, he’s dead. Unfortunately I happened to be the one who found the body, so all the supernaturals think I did it. They wanted to do away with me last night.”

  “Andie, this is terrible,” Vordrid said. “Any idea what caused the man’s death?”

  I rested my fixed-up mocha on the counter with a thud. “No. The wound smelled strange, like something had burned through him.”

  “Odd,” Vordrid said.

  I sipped my drink for a moment, letting the chocolaty goodness slide down my throat. The burst of sugar charged my brain. “V, you should help with the investigation. With your lab in the guest bathroom, you may be able to discover something that gets me off the hook.”

  Yes, Vordrid had a lab in the guest bathroom that he used for his experiments. Though he was a wizard by birth, my mentor was a scientist at heart.

  Dot handed Gabby a slice of bacon. “It’s not like you’ve been arrested or anything, Andie.”

  “If it had been up to the mob yesterday, I would have.” I sighed. “I’m supposed to meet Dex tonight to talk about it.”

  Dot and Vordrid froze. They pivoted toward one another and then back to me.

  I released a huge sigh. “There’s something I have to tell y’all.”

  Vordrid’s voice came out cold, distant. “I think you already did.”

  “Don’t be mad, V.”

  Vordrid rose from the stove and repositioned himself on top of the cabinets as if to get as much distance from me as possible. “I’m not angry. Not at all. I don’t feel like you’ve been holding out, keeping information from me, starving me, so to speak, from knowing the truth.”

  “What’s going on?” Kate said.

  I rubbed my palm across my forehead. “Gabby’s father is alive.”

  “Your husband,” Vordrid added.

  I tapped the wedding band on my left hand against the counter. No, I’d never taken it off.

  “I first saw him the night we broke the curse of The Witch’s Handbook. Oscar Snare was about to finish me when Dex showed up and stopped him. It was Dex who K-I-L-L-E-D him.”

  “What?” Dot said.

  I rolled my eyes. “K-I-L-L-E-D. I don’t want to use that word around you know who,” I said, nodding toward Gabby.

  “Oh,” Dot said.

  “Dex came to my window that same night. Vordrid, I didn’t tell you because he’s not the Dex we know.”

  Dot spoke between chewing a bit of bacon. “Did he have a lobotomy?”

  I shook my head. “That’s just a ridiculous thing to say. Why would you even think that?”

  Dot shrugged. “Well, Andie, you said he wasn’t the Dex we remember.”

  I massaged my temples. “I know that. But why would a lobotomy even come to mind? Forget it. Don’t answer. No. He didn’t have a lobotomy.”

  Dot handed Gabby the rest of the bacon. “Are you sure?”

  I clenched my fists in frustration. “Yes, I’m sure. Dex is a vampire. There. I’ve said it. He never died, Vordrid. When he and the lord vampire fought, the vampire turned Dex. He’s been alive—okay, not alive, undead—for almost three years. Three years! He could’ve found us. Could’ve found me. Known his daughter. But instead Dex stayed away from us. Let us believe he was dead.”

  “Vampire,” Gabby said enthusiastically.

  “You probably should’ve spelled it,” Dot said.

  I shot her a look of death.

  Silence enveloped the room. “He was probably afraid, Andie,” Vordrid finally said. “Afraid he would bite you. Afraid what you would think of him. Vampires and hunters are enemies; do I need to remind you of that?”

  I raked my fingers over my scalp and shook out my hair. “No, of course you don’t have to remind me. I know we’re enemies. He’s my enemy now. Anyway, we’re getting off track. Apparently Dex is in town, and better still, he’s like the mayor of the supernaturals.”

  “Is that like the mayor of Munchkin City in the Wizard of Oz?” Kate said.

  I rolled my eyes. “No. Not like that. This is serious. The supers were thinking of coming out of their proverbial supernatural closets last night. If they do, they’ve got another think coming.”

  Kate scrolled her finger over the newspaper article. “Why is that?” I flashed her what I thought was my most wicked smile. “You look really scary when you do that,” Kate said. “I don’t think you should go around parading that smile for people.”

  Dear Lord in heaven. Please save me from my family and friends.

  I toned down the smile. “Because Andie Taylor, witch and hunter, is watching and waiting. With Cal the Werewolf’s death, my guess is the supernaturals will be serving up some serious backlash, and I’m going to be ready.”

  “For what?” Dot said.

  I crossed my arms. “For whatever happens next.”

  I hadn’t heard from Stone all morning, so I decided to go into town. For some really odd reason I thought it would be fun to take Dot, Kate and Gabby. The Gabby and Kate part didn’t bother me. It was the great-aunt part that made me clutch my pearls. Or, since I wasn’t wearing pearls, the scarf around my neck.

  By the time we hit downtown, the church crowd was spilling out of St. Andrews Episcopal and hitting the food joints.

  “What are we looking for?” Kate said.

  “You’ll know it when you see it,” Dot explained.

  “That doesn’t help me,” Kate said.

  “Anything unusual,” I said. The vegetarian restaurant owned by Tetsa had a few outdoor tables and chairs. We walked past, and I noticed some of the servers had their hair pulled back. I stopped mid-sidewalk. Kate bumped into me.

  “Sorry,” she mumbled. “Is something going on?”

  I pointed toward a waitress. “Look there.”

  I glanced over my shoulder and watched Kate’s gaze flutter to the woman. “Oh wow.” She leaned into my ear. “It’s all of them.”

  “Yep,” I said.

  Every one of the fairies had their hair pulled back, revealing the pointed tops of their ears. I noticed a few of the patrons eyeing them, but they didn’t say anything.

  The door opened, and a server stepped outside. My chest constricted. It was Lana, the fairy who had accused me of murder—as if.

  She noticed me and stopped to whisper in the ear of another server. Both of them looked in my direction and started giggling. Heat flared on my cheeks. Whatever nastiness they were gossiping about, my guess was it had something to do with Cal’s murder and how I was the guilty party.

  Oh no, they weren’t going to get away with this. Revealing their ears was tantamount to admitting their supernaturalness to the town.

  For half a second I contemplated that what I was about to do wasn’t exactly the nicest thing ever. In fact, not only did I feel conflicted about it, but I felt like I was betraying myself by using my magic in the first place.

  But the whole fairies-showing-their-ears really got to me. So I got over myself pretty quickly.

  I raised a finger. A sliver of magic
uncoiled from my nail and sailed through the air. I focused on the ears, and in half a second, all the tips had vanished—at least to a regular person’s eyes.

  Lana glared at me, and I shot her a smile in return.

  We kept walking, passing a new men’s clothing store that catered to outdoor sportswear. A man opened the door and stepped outside. He lit up a cigar and gazed down the street, just casually taking everything in from what I could gather. Thick patches of hair covered his arms. His facial features were exaggerated with a long nose and a protruding brow—werewolf.

  “Afternoon,” he said in a chilling voice as we passed. His eyes narrowed at me, and though I didn’t recognize him from the night before, I suspected he knew about my involvement. Great. Did everyone know?

  “Afternoon,” I said.

  I wiggled my nose, and a stream of magic filtered from me. His patches of hair lessened, and the protruding brow melted back down to his normal face.

  “What’s going on?” Kate whispered.

  “They’re revolting,” Dot said. “Making themselves look more magical in front of the regular people.”

  “Yep,” I said. “My glamours won’t last forever, but it should hold for a solid day.”

  Kate looked around. “What will they see when they look in the mirror?”

  I cocked a brow. “They won’t notice on themselves, but they can tell on another person.”

  Kate clicked her tongue. “Clever.”

  The last placed we walked by was a crystal and herb shop called Witch’s Cauldron. Let me guess who owned it.

  The proprietor stepped outside to place a clapboard sign on the street. She wore a black dress and a pointy witch’s hat.

  Sheesh. Would these people not give up? For a moment I debated changing her outfit, but I figured since the place was called Witch’s Cauldron and she was dressed up like one, I didn’t see the point.

  “Morning, y’all,” she said as we walked past.

  “Good morning,” Dot said. “I don’t think we’ve ever met before.”

  “I’m Chloe,” she said. Her dark hair hung in thick waves down to her navel. It was gorgeous. I thought of my own limp hair and was instantly jealous.

  Chloe brushed dirt off her hands. “I moved in a few weeks ago. Wow. This is a great town. Absolutely wonderful. It’s so awesome that there are so many of us around.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, it’s great. Nice, small town full of fairies, werewolves and country boys.”

  Chloe's green eyes studied me for a moment; then she laughed. “Life’s full of contradictions. Hey, you’re that hunter, aren’t you?”

  I nodded.

  She clapped her hands together with glee. “Oh, I’d just love for you to come in sometime, tell me what you know. I’m more of an earth witch. I do a little spelling but not much.”

  “I’m a brand-new witch,” Kate chirped.

  I glared at her. Traitor. We weren’t supposed to be making friends. We were on a covert mission that apparently only I knew about.

  Chloe smiled at Kate. “Oh, I have lots of things for brand-new witches to learn. Small spells that will help you increase your power or even focus your magic.”

  “Any love spells?” Kate said.

  I rolled my eyes at that one.

  “What?” Kate said to me. “I’ve got to get this baby-making machine going.”

  Chloe nodded enthusiastically. “I’ve got a love spell or two.”

  Dot cleared her throat. “Love spells only work if you know who you want it to work on. If you put a generic love spell on yourself, you’ll attract every man this side of yesterday. You’ve got to find the eye of your affection first. That’s the best way to work things.”

  Kate sighed. “Okay, I’ll be on the lookout. But I just haven’t seen anyone yet.”

  “So you just do little things?” I said to Chloe.

  The witch picked up an empty cauldron and placed it on the sidewalk in front of the board. “Pretty much,” she said right as she zapped the black bowl with her finger. It immediately started steaming as if she’d dropped a pound of dry ice in it.

  All four of us stepped back—even Gabby.

  “Mommy, smoke,” she said.

  “Yeah,” Chloe said. “I don’t really do much. I’m not that talented.”

  “Right,” Dot said sarcastically.

  For once I had to agree with my great-aunt.

  Chloe had swindled us.

  I looked at my watch. It was getting late. “Okay, well, thanks. We’ve got to be going.”

  Chloe waved as we walked on. “Stop by anytime.”

  “Thank you,” I said.

  When we were out of earshot, Kate leaned over. “Well? Are you going to do anything to her?”

  I nibbled my lip. “Yeah. Tell me when she’s gone back inside.”

  “She’s gone,” Dot said.

  I giggled as I sent a stream of magic from my fingertips into the bowl.

  “Flowers,” Kate squealed. “That’s hilarious. You substituted the steam for a bunch of mums.”

  I laughed. “Yep. Let these supernaturals just try to take over my town. Let them try. All they’ll do is fail.”

  FIVE

  I stood outside the address Dex had given me. It was a stone building not far from the restaurant where the murder had occurred the night before.

  “What are you waiting for?”

  I glanced down at my open purse. Vordrid sat on top of a hairbrush.

  I bent my knee and jabbed the tip of a booted toe on the ground. “Just looking.”

  “Dex wouldn’t set a trap for you.”

  “I didn’t say he would.”

  “Did you tell your new boyfriend about this meeting?”

  An invisible hand squeezed my heart. “No, and he’s not my boyfriend.” I closed my lips and played ventriloquist so that I wouldn’t look like a crazy person talking to herself. You know, in case someone was looking. “Stone isn’t available in that way.” Though that hadn’t stopped us from doing a bit of kissing on occasion. A wave of guilt rushed through me. “Besides, I thought it better if he didn’t know. I’ll tell him what happens. If anything goes wrong, you can protect me, V.”

  “You didn’t bring the handbook with you, did you?”

  I sighed. “No.”

  “I don’t think you’ll need it.”

  The Witch’s Handbook, a smallish book filled with lots of useful and useless knowledge, held my hunter’s powers. I was a witch, so I inherently had a bit of power, but to magically destroy a creature like a vampire, I needed the help of the book. It was infused with much more power than a single person alone possessed.

  I guess the fact that I hadn’t brought it meant I wasn’t planning on using the power on Dex. Let’s face it; I didn’t need another death to be blamed on me.

  We reached the building. I knocked. The door swung open, and Bruce the Werewolf, bouncer extraordinaire and apparently lead investigator, answered the door.

  “Come in,” he said.

  I stepped inside, and he patted me down like a criminal. “Hey! Watch the valuables. Some of us ladies don’t like being manhandled by wolves.”

  “Witches,” he mumbled. “Always think they’re right about everything. Come on.”

  He led me down a hall. Dex had called the meeting in a mortgage loan business. Lots of framed posters with motivational quotes and dusty plastic plants lined the walls. We reached the end of the hall, and Bruce opened a door.

  Dex sat in a chair behind a mahogany desk. He rose. His amber hair was freshly washed. His thick tresses were cut short, barely dusting the top of his collar. The ends curled behind his ears. The clean yet spicy scent of cologne filled the room.

  A pang of sadness shot through my heart. I pushed it down, away, as quickly as possible.

  Dex’s button-down shirt opened at a short V at the neck. He had the sleeves rolled up to the elbows again, revealing corded forearms that looked like they could break a wooden staff in two. Since he
now had vampire strength, I’m sure they could. His face was nearly as sculpted as his arms with a strong jaw, straight nose and piercing blue eyes—eyes with color that popped even more against his bloodless, alabaster skin.

  Dex had been built in life, with a golden flesh that seemed to glow. He was charismatic, charming, funny and the kind of guy who made your knees buckle just from the sound of his voice. But now he appeared sharper, more angular, his skin pale, and his muscles looked starved of water, like a bodybuilder’s—ready to pop at any moment.

  I had no doubt he wielded the strength and speed of a vampire.

  He tapped his fingers on his belt. “I didn’t know if you’d come.”

  I stepped inside and shuffled left, leaning against the wall. “How could I not with your note taped to my window? I had to see what all the mystery was about.”

  His eyes narrowed briefly as if I’d hurt him.

  Good. I hoped I had. After all, he’d hurt me.

  “Dexter,” Vordrid said. He rocketed out of my purse and hovered in the room.

  Dex’s face broke into radiant joy. “V,” he exclaimed. Dex opened his arms wide, and Vordrid sailed into them. The vampire hugged Vordrid.

  “Dexter, I never thought I’d see you again.”

  Dex held Vordrid out in front of him. “Me neither. Oh, it’s so good to see you. We’ve got lots to catch up on.”

  “Like you’re a vampire,” I said.

  “Yeah.” Dex flinched. “That’s one thing, but it’s not the most important. How’ve you been, V?”

  “Andie has promised to free me from this 8 Ball.”

  Dex’s gaze darted to me. “Is that so?”

  I crossed my arms and huffed. “I promised to try. Doing that means I have to harness the power of the book without using it.”

  Dex studied me with a look I couldn’t put my finger on. “Wow. Sounds like that would take a very powerful witch. But if anyone’s capable of it, it’s Andie.”

  I ignored the compliment. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “It means the Andie I know—”

  “Knew,” I corrected. “The Andie you knew—”

  He didn’t miss a beat. Dex was sharp, quick. “The Andie I knew would laugh in the face of challenge, sink her teeth into it. Bite it off and spit it out like the warrior princess she is.”