Just For Me: A Cerasino Family Novella

by Abbie Zanders

  My eyes flicked away from his just long enough to read the caption: Cerasino’s Books Proudly Welcomes Best-Selling Author Nick Penn.

  Well, hell.

  Chapter 8: Nick

  I felt as if I’d just been punched in the gut. “Kat’s been attacked?”

  Sofie’s eyes widened in surprise. “You know her?”

  “Sort of,” I admitted. “Kat is... Bella.”

  Gina blinked. “Wait. Bella? As is, Nonno’s Bella? The one who was supposed to be here today?”

  I nodded.

  “Oh, shit.”

  Oh shit didn’t begin to cover it. Of all the possible reasons I’d come up with to explain why Kat hadn’t shown, getting mugged hadn’t been one of them. “Sofe, what happened? Tell me. I need to know everything.”

  A dark pink flush painted her cheeks as she avoided my gaze. For as chatty as she’d been a couple minutes ago, she was now unwilling to spill. “You know I can’t do that, Nicky,” she said quietly.

  Under normal circumstances, I would have accepted that and let it be. Sofia was a doctor, and I understood that there were plenty of laws and rules and guidelines governing the privacy of those she saw in a professional capacity. But this was Kat we were talking about, and I wasn’t going to let her slide by with handing me that ‘patient confidentiality’ crap. Especially not when phrases like ‘punch to the face’ and ‘she’s all alone’ were repeating on a loop in my head.

  “You’ve already told me most of it,” I reminded her, pinning her with a glare.

  “That was before I knew you knew who she was.”

  “Well I know now, and I can’t unhear it, can I?”

  She bit her lip, and I almost felt guilty for abusing our brother-sister bond. Almost. “Please, Sofia,” I pleaded, lowering my voice. Her eyes narrowed, and I met them head on with the determination of the Marine who was barely holding my caveman at bay. She knew me well enough to know that I wouldn’t ask her to bend the rules unless I thought it was important. This definitely fell into that category, and I wanted her to look deep and really listen to what I was trying to tell her. “She’s... important to me, Sofe.”

  It took a minute, but her eyes softened, and I knew she understood. “All right, Nicky,” she said on an exhale. “But let’s go back to Ma’s and call Vinnie, okay? He knows more about what happened than I do.”

  I wasn’t happy about having to wait. The caveman lurking beneath my skin was restless, grunting and swinging his club and wanting to do something. The Marine was right there beside him, keeping him under control and preparing for an as-yet-undetermined mission. Thankfully, he also recognized the wisdom in my sister’s suggestion, and I found myself nodding again.

  Sofie shot a text off to Vinnie, and we did a quick clean-up, throwing stuff into boxes and shoving them into one of the storage rooms. My grandfather, who’d overheard enough of the exchange to also be concerned, promised he and my grandmother would meet us at the restaurant shortly.

  An hour later, I grimaced as I saw yet another cousin pushing his way into the already-crowded private dining area. “What did you do,” I muttered out of the side of my mouth to Gina, who was sitting to my immediate left, “call in the whole family?”

  She wrinkled her nose at me. “This was supposed to be a surprise dinner for you,” she said, equally quietly. “For making it through your first official signing.”

  Before I could feel like too much of an ungrateful jerk, she added, “But with all of them here, don’t count on any of them to keep quiet about what’s going on with your Bella.”

  Fuck my life. I sat back and ran my hand down my face, wondering how the hell I managed to get myself into these situations. I loved my big, nosy, pain in the ass family, and I appreciated that they’d do something like this for me, but I didn’t need this right now. All I could think about was Kat, alone and hurting. What kind of animal would do something like that to someone as quiet and gentle as her? The rage was a slow burn deep inside, and it was only getting hotter the more I thought about it.

  I had no one to blame but myself. I should have manned up months ago and approached her. I should have taken the hint Fate had provided, putting us both in my grandfather’s bookstore at the same time, over and over again. I should have taken advantage of the perfect opportunity to bond over our shared interests – books and coffee – and let things progress naturally from there. If I had, I was quite certain Kat would have been with me last night instead of alone in a dark alley somewhere being attacked.

  By the time Vinnie showed, we’d forgotten the original reason for the get together and Kat’s attack was the primary topic of conversation. Everyone was up to speed on the basics, and I was ready to crawl out of my skin.

  “So Vinnie, what’s up with Kat?” my cousin Lucia asked the moment he sat down. Poor Vin, he looked as confused as I’d been. Still in his uniform, he must have headed over right after his shift, and clearly, Sofie’s text hadn’t given him a heads-up.

  “The woman you took to the ER last night – that was Nicky’s Bella,” my Nonna Maria explained. “And now we gotta make things right.”

  I saw the realization dawn as Vinnie put the pieces together. He looked at Sofie, then shot me a questioning look, which I answered with a brief nod.

  “I don’t know what the big deal is,” my brother Paulie said with a shrug, stuffing a meatball into his mouth. “Nicky should just take the book over there himself. Boom, problem solved.”

  “The big deal,” my cousin Corina said, rolling her eyes, “is that that’s a stupid idea. He can’t just show up at her door and spring that kinda thing on her. He’s a freakin’ celebrity.”

  Every male at the table snorted at that, including me. Unless you were Tony Bennett or Al Pacino (and occasionally Joe Pesci on a good day), you weren’t considered a ‘celebrity’ in my family.

  “Well, he is to her,” Corina sniffed.

  “That’s what makes it so romantic,” my seventeen year old cousin Ramona said with a sigh. “Tell me you’ve never dreamed of something like that.”

  Surprisingly, not one woman denied it. Even Corina clamped her mouth shut.

  “But he’s not a celebrity in Kat’s eyes,” Gina countered. “She doesn’t even know who he is, does she, Nicky?”

  I shook my head. Not as far as I knew, anyway. Something told me if Kat knew I was the same guy who wrote the books she clutched and sighed over, she would have been more self-conscious around me. But that was just a guess. Personally, I loved watching her when she got lost in a book and let her guard down.

  “That’s even worse then,” Lucia was saying. “’Cause then he’s just some creeper guy from the bookstore who knows where she lives.

  Ouch. As much as I didn’t want to admit it, she might have a point. While I’d felt a connection with Kat early on, we didn’t actually know each other. Using her as my muse and quietly observing her from afar did not qualify as proper courting, not even close. Other than our collision the other day, we’d never even spoken to one another.

  Then I thought more about that collision. Of her sharp intake of breath. The way she trembled slightly beneath my fingers. The brief but unmistakable flare of lust in her pretty eyes before the embarrassment kicked in.

  “No, I don’t think so,” Ramona said reflectively, tilting her head as she looked my way. “Nothing about Nicky says creeper. All of my friends think he’s kind of like an Italian Captain America. They think he’s totally hot.”

  Horrified, I gulped down some of my ice water, but my brothers’ evil grins told me they’d heard and would not let it slide by.

  “We need a plan,” Sofie said thoughtfully. “She likes your books, right?”

  “Si, she’s-a his biggest fan,” Nonno answered emphatically.

  “Well, then, we just have to figure out what one of the guys in your books would do, and that’s what you gotta do, Nicky.”

  Heads bobbed in agreement all around the table. The idea held merit. Instead of appro
aching this as Nicholas Cerasino, former Marine and romance author, I needed to approach it as Nick Penn, creator of alpha male heroes with hearts of gold. Technically, one could argue that they were really one and the same, but none of my heroes would sit idly by when they found the woman they wanted to know better.

  A slow smile curled the edges of my lips as I began to imagine the possibilities. This could actually work. All I had to do was imagine one of my heroes in the same situation and will the words to come. I wasn’t worried. Kat had unknowingly been the inspiration for everything my heroes did for a while now.

  Several minutes passed before I realized everyone was staring at me expectantly. My smile turned into a grin. “If you’ll excuse me, everyone. I’ve got some writing to do.”

  If Katherine O’Shea couldn’t come to see Nick Penn, Nick Penn was going to go to her.

  Chapter 9: Kat

  When I dragged myself out of bed late Sunday morning, I’d already made up my mind that I was done with prescription narcotics. The pounding headache had been the worst, but a solid ten hours of sleep took most of the edge off of that. I was still pretty stiff and sore, but nothing I couldn’t handle with a hot shower, some good old-fashioned over the counter pain relievers, and a heating pad.

  Besides, I needed my wits about me today, and those pills made me loopy. Last night I had this crazy dream that the hot laptop guy I saw in the bookstore every week was actually Nick Penn.

  I chuckled as I shuffled my way into the kitchen and made some coffee. That one ranked way up there on the wishful thinking scale, but I could totally see where my mind had gotten the idea. Every week he’d sit at one of the back tables with a big cup of coffee, looking all casual and sexy as his fingers tapped away at his keyboard. I didn’t know any authors, but I imagined that’s exactly what they looked like when they wrote. And really, what better setting to write than in a bookstore, especially one with free wifi, great coffee, and delicious homemade Italian baked goods?

  As nice as it was to imagine sexy laptop guy as secretly being my favorite author, I was on the fence as to whether I wanted it to be real or not. On the one hand, it was pretty awesome to think that I might have actually been there when he was crafting one of his stories. On the other hand, it would mean that I’d inadvertently body-slammed and head-butted Nick Freaking Penn.

  Of course, I could just log onto the bookstore’s website and know.

  But no, I wouldn’t do that now for the same reason I hadn’t up to this point. It was far more fun and exciting to imagine that sexy laptop guy and Nick Penn were one and the same than to know for sure they weren’t. They were in my fantasy land and that’s all that mattered to me.

  Sticking with the soft food theme, I made myself some scrambled eggs, sprinkling some cheese on top to make up for my lack of chewy bagel on the side. After breakfast, I took another long, hot shower and donned some comfortable, loose fitting clothes, then went about my normal Sunday routine, albeit a bit slower than usual.

  I threw in a load of laundry and did a bit of light cleaning. Since I lived alone and wasn’t a slob, it didn’t take me long. Then it was time to curl up on the sofa with a cup of coffee and read for a few hours. If things had gone according to plan, I’d be re-reading my new book, but since that wasn’t happening, I’d just have to settle for something else.

  I’d just gotten cozy when my buzzer buzzed, announcing a visitor. I frowned, wondering who it could be. I rarely got visitors, except for the older woman across the hall. Occasionally she’d lock herself out, then ask to use my phone to call the building super.

  I debated getting up. If I didn’t answer, she’d simply go to the next door and keep working her way down the corridor until she found someone willing to let her in and allow her to bend their ear till the super got his lazy butt up there. I felt kind of bad about that, but knowing her, she’d take one look at my face and feel obligated to fuss over me and make me relay every minute detail. Then she’d insist I needed a man to look after me and the rest of my afternoon would be spent listening to her talk about what a great catch her grandson Nelson was.

  I was absolutely not feeling up to that.

  I felt even less so when the buzzer buzzed again. And again. And again.

  “Eff my life,” I mumbled. She wasn’t going to go away.

  I uncurled myself from my little nest and went to the door, ready to add a bit of frost to my normally polite greeting. What I wasn’t ready for was seeing six feet of über handsome sexy laptop guy standing outside my apartment, looking concerned.

  After that initial WTF moment, self awareness set in. While he looked insanely hot in his jeans and black leather duster, I was wearing baggy sweats and a faded football jersey. While his hair looked just-loved sexy, mine was pulled back into a no-fuss ponytail. And while his face looked freshly shaven and smooth, mine was bruised, slightly swollen, and totally sans make-up.

  “Hi,” he said simply. Despite my horror, my toes curled at that deep, husky voice.

  “Hi.”

  “I heard what happened. Are you okay?”

  I blinked, my mind zinging along at warp speed trying to figure out how he could possibly know. Since the only place we ever saw each other was the bookstore, he must have heard it there. I vaguely remember Officer Vinnie saying his grandfather was Mr. C.

  “Yeah,” I answered lamely. “What are you doing here?”

  Thick, dark eyelashes lowered and he offered a lopsided, shy grin. “I wanted to bring you this.”

  I looked down, noticing the familiar looking bag he held out to me. Still, I didn’t move. We continued to stand there awkwardly until he cleared his throat and said unnecessarily, “It’s a book.”

  My heart stuttered. “The new Nick Penn?”

  He nodded.

  I had some decisions to make. My head swam with all kinds of possible scenarios and outcomes. Did I say thanks but no thanks and send him on his way? Did I accept the gift, say thanks, and then wish him a good day? Or did I do what every bone in my body wanted to do and invite him in?

  I looked like hell and didn’t feel much better, but it wasn’t like I could hide now. He couldn’t un-see me, so the damage was already done. Oddly enough, that made it easier. I was still anxious, but not as much.

  I looked down again at the bag, then back at his face. He looked as uncertain as I did, and that clinched it.

  I snatched the bag out of his hands and smiled. “Would you like to come in for a cup of coffee or something? I just made a fresh pot.”

  His smile nearly made me gasp. I realized I never actually seen him smile before. It had a completely devastating effect on my girly bits. “Yes, that would be great, thanks.”

  Chapter 10: Nick

  Growing up with a couple of sisters, I recognized self-consciousness when I saw it. But even with a pair of black eyes and a bruised face, I thought she was beautiful.

  “I’m sorry about what happened,” I said, following her into her place. It was small, but cozy, done in comforting neutral shades with feminine accents.

  “It wasn’t your fault.”

  We’d have to agree to disagree on that. Oh, I know I wasn’t directly responsible, but I couldn’t help but think I should have done something far earlier. My inner caveman had been thinking of Kat as mine for a while now, and both the man and the Marine in me felt I should have done a better job taking care of her. We’d be working on that, effective immediately.

  “Cream? Sugar?”

  “Black is fine, thanks.”

  “It’s not as good as Mrs. C’s, but it won’t kill you,” she said, handing me the mug. I loved how she was losing some of her nervousness around me, evening teasing me a little. Maybe it was because we were on her turf now, or maybe because we’d made it over that first hurdle.

  “Nobody makes an espresso like Nonna Maria.”

  “Nonna... that’s grandmother in Italian, right?” I nodded, watching her put the pieces together. “Which means Mr. C is your grandfather, an
d Vinnie and Sofia must be your siblings? Or cousins?”

  I grinned, appreciating her intelligence. “Brother and sister. I’m Nicholas, by the way. Nicholas Cerasino. But most people call me Nick.”

  I heard her sharp inhale at the same time her eyes went wide, and wondered how many other things my clever Kat might have been piecing together.

  “I’m Katherine.”

  “I know. My grandfather talks about you all the time.”

  She blushed. It was adorable. “He calls me Bella.”

  “He’s not wrong.”

  Her eyes softened briefly, then she shook her head slightly as if to clear it. “So, what is it you do, Nick?”

  I lifted the coffee mug to my lips and took a sip. I was fairly certain she was holding her breath, waiting for my answer.

  “I’m an author.”

  “An author,” she echoed quietly.

  “Yes.”

  “That’s great,” she said, shifting slightly. “I imagine it’s a pretty competitive business.”

  “It can be,” I agreed. I could see where this was headed, and tried to slow it down. Not because I was trying to hold anything back, but because I didn’t want Nick Cerasino to disappear in Nick Penn’s shadow. “What about you, Kat? What do you do?”

  I already knew, of course, but she didn’t know that. And I liked the way her eyes widened behind those sexy librarian glasses when I called her Kat.

  “What? Oh, nothing so exciting, I’m afraid. I’m an accountant. I crunch numbers all day.” She pushed her glasses farther up on her nose. I’d seen her make the gesture countless times when she was reading, and recognized it as something she did when she was feeling a little anxious. “What kind of books do you write?”

  I smiled. “Promise not to laugh?”