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by Susan Mallery


  “One year ahead of you.”

  He reached into his jacket pocket and brought out the two pictures. The first showed Ben in high school and the second had been taken four months ago at their base camp.

  She studied them, then shook her head. “Sorry. I don’t know him.” Then she frowned. “Why me?”

  “His girlfriend’s name was Ashley.”

  She raised her eyebrows. “You’re kidding. You’re going to talk to every Ashley who went to high school with this guy?”

  “Until I find her.”

  “Good luck with that.” She hesitated. “Your friend died, didn’t he?”

  Walker nodded.

  “I’m sorry. I hope you find her.”

  “I will.”

  “I’LL BE FINE,” Cal said. “I get to sleep through everything. Lindsey’s the one with the tough job.”

  Penny nodded. She’d done a little research on the Internet and knew he was telling the truth. Cal would wake up with a few bruises, facing two or three days of recovery. Lindsey was in for a much rougher time as her body dealt with the new bone marrow.

  “Are you sorry you put off meeting her?” she asked.

  “No. Lindsey has enough to deal with right now. I want her to focus on getting better. She can meet me later.”

  Several members of the hospital staff came into the room. “It’s time,” the nurse said.

  “Okay.” Penny bent down and kissed Cal. “I’ll be here when you wake up.”

  “You don’t have to do that. I’ll be fine.”

  “I know.”

  He squeezed her hand. “Thanks.”

  She waited until they wheeled him out, then she joined Reid in the waiting room.

  “Some belly you got there,” he said when he saw her.

  She smiled. “Gee, thanks.”

  He patted the cushion next to him in the colorful, plant-filled room. “Just trying to distract you. There’s no reason to worry.”

  “So everyone keeps saying. I’m not worried. Not exactly.”

  “Then what?”

  “I don’t know. This is all so strange. Three months ago I hadn’t spoken with Cal in ages and now…”

  “Now you’re in a hospital waiting for him to have a simple procedure that may save the life of a child you never knew about?”

  “That’s a very nice summary.”

  Reid leaned back in the sofa and picked up a paper cup of coffee. “Does his willingness to help Lindsey make you mad?”

  She considered the question. “Not mad. I want her to be fine. And there was never any choice. Cal’s a good man. Of course he would do this.”

  “But?”

  “But…why wasn’t he like this with me?”

  “When you lost the baby?”

  She nodded. Why hadn’t he cared more? Why hadn’t he been willing to open his heart to their child? “There’s so much he didn’t tell me, so much he wouldn’t say. He’s not very forthcoming, emotionally.”

  “Does that matter?”

  It shouldn’t. She and Cal weren’t together. Not in that way. And yet…

  “I don’t have an answer,” she said. “Let’s change the subject.”

  “Okay. We could talk about how good-looking I am.”

  “There’s a topic that could fill hours.”

  He smiled smugly. “Yes, it could. It’s also one of my favorites. You start.”

  She laughed. “No, thanks. Have you talked to Naomi lately? She’s been off doing stuff. I haven’t seen her much.”

  “She and Walker were in the bar a couple of weeks ago. I haven’t seen them since.”

  “I know she has a lot on her mind. She’s mentioned she might be leaving.” Penny thought about what Naomi had told her about having a family back in Ohio. “I understand she had a life before she came here, but I don’t want her to go. Gee, suddenly everything seems to be about me.” She sighed. “I’ll miss her.”

  “She’s been a good friend to you.”

  “I know. You’re great, too, but you don’t do the girl stuff really well. You never want to talk about pedicures.”

  “Or body waxing.”

  Penny smiled. “That, too.”

  Dani walked into the waiting room. “Has he already gone in?”

  “A few minutes ago,” Reid said as he stood. “How’s my baby sister?”

  “I’ve been better, but I’m surviving.” Dani hugged Reid, then smiled at Penny. “So, is that offer still open?”

  “Sure. You want to come be my roommate?”

  Dani sank down in Reid’s seat and nodded. “If you don’t mind. I need to get out of the apartment as soon as I can.”

  “How about right now? We can go get a key made while Cal’s still under anesthesia and you can move your stuff this afternoon. I’m going to be staying with him for a couple of days so you’d have the house to yourself while you settle.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Absolutely. It’ll be fun.”

  “Okay, then I say yes. I appreciate this so much.”

  Penny stood. “Reid, call me if anything happens. I have my cell on.”

  He raised his eyebrows. “Moving back in together. That’s interesting.”

  “Oh, please. The man is having bone marrow sucked out of his hip. He’s going to have bruises the size of Utah and feel like he was hit by a truck. I don’t think you have to worry about anything happening.”

  Unfortunately.

  CAL TRIED to get comfortable on the chair, but it wasn’t happening.

  “If you’d take the Tylenol, like the doctor said, you wouldn’t be suffering,” Penny called from down the hall.

  He shook his head. How the hell had she known he was in pain? Women were a mystery.

  “I’m fine,” he yelled back.

  “You’re lying.”

  He heard footsteps on the hardwood floor of the hallway, then she stuck her head in the living room. “I’m getting you the pills right now and I’m going to loom over you until you take them. Is that clear?”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  She grinned. “Respect. I like that. Be right back.”

  When she returned, she was true to her word, standing over him until he’d dutifully swallowed the two pills.

  “I wrote down the time so we’ll know when you can take more,” she said.

  “I’m perfectly fine.”

  She put her hands on her hips, which tightened her shirt around her growing belly. “Oh, please. You have massive bruises on your hips, along with what looked like six hundred puncture marks.”

  “It’s not that many. Compared with what Lindsey has to go through, this is nothing.”

  Penny sank down onto the sofa across from his chair. “I know. I spoke with her mom for a few minutes while you were still recovering. Lindsey’s pretty wrecked from the chemo.”

  Cal didn’t doubt it. The kid was in for a brutal process. First chemotherapy destroyed Lindsey’s bone marrow, then she received an IV with his. Over the next few weeks, while her immune system was compromised, she would be kept isolated from the world. She would also battle what would feel like the worst flu of her life for that same period of time.

  “I’ve popped onto the Internet and read about the procedure,” Penny said. “There’s a really good chance your bone marrow will cure her leukemia.”

  “I hope so.”

  “I wish there was more I could do,” she said.

  “You’re here. I appreciate that.”

  “You should. I’ll have you know I don’t normally make cooking house calls, but I’m making an exception for you. We’ll be dining on all your favorites.”

  His stomach rumbled. “Meat loaf?” He hadn’t had Penny’s meat loaf since before the divorce.

  “Tonight. Then tomorrow, my very twisted Thai lasagna.”

  “Won’t you be at the restaurant? We can’t both be gone that long.”

  “I’ll be going back and forth,” she said. “Naomi’s there, not to worry. Want to watch sp
orts on TV?”

  “No thanks.”

  “Hmm, do you have a fever?”

  He smiled. “Reid’s the sports guy. Did you unpack?”

  “Yes. The guest room is lovely. I’m going out on a limb and saying you didn’t decorate it yourself.”

  “Dani helped. She picked out the colors and the linens and the furniture. I did the labor.”

  She glanced around the living room. “The house is great.”

  “Paid for by the coffee drinkers of the Pacific Northwest.”

  “We do love our coffee.”

  She looked out the living room windows at the view of downtown. “You did good, Cal. You started with nothing and you created an empire. You should be proud of yourself.”

  “Thanks.”

  She turned back to him. “I get it now—the need to go out and make something happen on your own, but when you first left the restaurant business, I thought you were leaving me.”

  “What are you talking about?” How could she have thought that?

  “It’s hard to explain. We had a whole life that revolved around being awake when most of the world was asleep. We talked about the same kind of problems with customers and staffs and bosses. Then, suddenly, you wanted out. You became one of them, working nine to five.” She shrugged. “I guess that sounds really strange. But at the time, I felt abandoned.”

  “I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I wanted to get away from Gloria and her constant monitoring of my life. I was tired of the threats, the ugliness.”

  “I know,” Penny said. Funny how with the passage of time a lot of things became more clear. “I wish I’d been more supportive.”

  Cal shook his head. “Don’t. You were great.”

  “You don’t know how angry I was with you.”

  He looked surprised. “You’re right. You hid it from me.”

  “Not my finest moment. I thought you’d change your mind and come back.”

  “You thought I’d fail.”

  Guilt made her uncomfortable. “Maybe.”

  “I should have explained more to you,” he said. “I was embarrassed to. I thought you’d think less of me.”

  Maybe it was the pain, or knowing his daughter was dangerously ill. Maybe it was the time they’d spent together, but Cal was vulnerable in a way she’d never seen him before.

  “I loved you,” she said. “I would have done anything for you.”

  “I know.” His dark gaze settled on her face. “You deserved better than the little I had to give. I wish…I wish I’d been honest with you. Lindsey felt like such a big secret. I knew telling you about her would change everything. I should have trusted you to be able to handle it.”

  Something warm and squishy enveloped her heart. She wanted to be in Cal’s arms and have him hold her close. She wanted them to go to bed and make love until the sun came up.

  Either he was thinking the same thing or he read the invitation in her eyes. He stood and held out his hand.

  She rose and walked to him. As she reached for him, he pulled her close. His arms went around her, she put her hands on his waist and he kissed her.

  The contact was as erotic as it was familiar. She closed her eyes as he brushed his lips against hers, generating heat and need and sparks. Within seconds her breasts were swollen and sensitive and her thighs had begun to tremble.

  “What is it about you?” he asked before he swept his tongue against her bottom lip.

  Rather than answering, she opened to accept him. As he pushed inside and they began an intimate dance, he cupped her head as if to hold her in place.

  Had she been able to form coherent thoughts, she would have told him she wasn’t going anywhere. She wanted him too much. Wanted this. Funny how in all the time they’d been apart she’d managed to do fairly nicely with only a minimum of sexual contact, but now, with him, she felt weak with desire.

  He drew back and nipped on her bottom lip, then kissed her jaw. As he moved to her neck, he shifted and instantly stiffened.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked.

  “Nothing.”

  Somehow the tightness of his mouth and the shadows of pain in his eyes told her differently.

  She stepped back. “What was I thinking? You’re just out of the hospital a couple of hours ago. They used your hips as pincushions and sucked out quarts of bone marrow. Sit down right now.”

  He shook his head. “No. Let’s keep going.”

  He took her hand and brought it to his groin. He was hard and when she touched him, he flexed against her fingers.

  She knew that she was already wet and swollen, but none of that mattered.

  “Cal, be serious. You’ve just had general anesthetic. You’re weak, tired and this is the last thing you should be doing.”

  He stared into her eyes. She looked back, letting him see the need inside of her.

  “Rain check,” she whispered, as she kissed him. “I promise.”

  “No. We can do this.”

  “Right. Because you whimpering in pain is really sexy.”

  “I don’t whimper.”

  “I know. You’re a big strong guy who right now needs a nap. Alone.”

  He picked up her hand and kissed her palm. “I want you.”

  Words to make a pregnant woman dance with delight. “I want you, too. We’ll do something about it real soon. I promise.”

  He hesitated, then nodded. “Okay. I think I need to crash for a while.”

  “The doctor said it would take a couple of days for you to get the anesthesia out of your system. Plus, you have to get your strength back from the whole bone marrow sucking. Go take a nap. I’ll run over to the restaurant, then be back to fix meat loaf.”

  He squeezed her fingers. “Thanks. You don’t have to do this.”

  “I know, but I want to.”

  Although why, she wouldn’t, she couldn’t, say.

  DANI SEALED the box and put it on top of the others by the front door. She would either have to come back later with a couple of burly guys and a van or work out a financial agreement with Hugh about him buying her out of half the furniture. For now, she only wanted her clothes and some personal items.

  She hadn’t slept much the previous night. Although Penny’s guest bed had been comfortable, Dani had had too much on her mind. So much had happened so quickly. Hugh wanting a divorce, finding out he was cheating on her, moving out. It would be a while before she was finally able to draw in a breath and relax.

  She opened the linen closet and pulled out a big box of photos. More things she was going to have to go through. She tossed it into a carton. She would sort them at Penny’s and return Hugh’s to him. She had no idea what they would do with the pictures they had taken together. Who would want those?

  So many things to divide. Their good china and crystal, DVDs, electronic equipment. They’d been together nearly seven years. That made for a lot of baggage.

  She heard the garage door open and stiffened. A quick glance at her watch told her Hugh wasn’t due home for another two hours. She’d planned to be finished long before that.

  She had a brief thought that his chickie had stopped by for something when she heard the soft sound of wheels on hardwood.

  “Dani?”

  She closed the linen closet door and stepped into the living room. “You weren’t supposed to be here,” she said.

  Hugh looked as he always did—handsome, strong, sexy. The wheelchair did nothing to detract from his appeal. A friend from grad school had once confessed—after too many rum-and-cokes—that the wheelchair only made a woman think about being more creative, where Hugh was concerned. At the time Dani had laughed off the comment. Now she realized she should have paid attention.

  He sat straight in his chair, his gold-blond hair a little too long, his blue eyes looking both innocent and soulful. There was something about his mouth, something that made a woman want to kiss him.

  He had big hands and, at least for him, the old wives’ tale was true. Ev
en with the loss of sensation for Hugh, that part of him could still work, and she’d had plenty of fun riding him to paradise.

  As had others, apparently.

  “I’m sorry you had to see that,” he said. “I didn’t mean for you to find out.”

  She walked into the bedroom and began pulling clothes off hangers. “Interesting. You’re not sorry you were cheating on me, you’re just sorry you were caught.” She heard him move into the room. “With a student, Hugh. That’s tacky, even for you.”

  “It’s not what you’re thinking.”

  “You have no idea what I’m thinking.” She tossed the clothes into an open box, then glared at him. “You don’t know anything about me. I’m furious. You want a divorce. Fine. We’ll get one. You’ve moved on. I can accept that. But what I can’t accept is that you’re messing around with your students. God knows how many.”

  “Don’t be insulting.”

  “Oh, right. Because only sleeping with one of them is so noble. What a great man you are. How proud we all are.” She moved close and stared down at him. “I was there for you, you bastard. Every day from the second you were hurt. I gave up my life to help you. I encouraged you, I begged you to keep living. I loved you with every fiber of my being. What I expected in return was for you to love me just as much. And if you couldn’t do that, I expected you to respect me. But you didn’t.”

  “Sure. Make me the bad guy.”

  She wanted to scream. “How am I at fault in any of this?”

  “I just wanted a divorce. Why is that a crime?”

  “It’s not, you bastard. You lied and cheated. You betrayed me. That student isn’t the first. I’m stunned to find out you’re a lousy human being.”

  He glared at her. “Because I’m in a wheelchair, you expect me to be a saint? I’m not supposed to have flaws like other men, because I’m not really a man?”

  She’d never wanted to hit another person before in her life, but the urge to pick up a lamp and crash it over Hugh’s head was incredibly powerful.

  “I expect you to be a decent person because we’re married,” she yelled. “I expected you to honor your wedding vows because I thought you had a sense of morality and because I thought you cared about me and our relationship. Not everything is about you being in a wheelchair. You being an asshole has absolutely nothing to do with you being in a wheelchair. You’d be one even if you could run a marathon. Now get out of here so I can finish getting my things.”

 

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