For Sparrow (The Dream Dominant Collection Book 3)

by Pandora Spocks

  He pulled her on top of himself, nabbing her lips in his own. “That’s more than okay. I don’t really want to share you with another man.”

  “Good. Then it’s just you and me?”

  Judd nodded. “Just you and me, Angel. Would you want to come back down and play here again, just you and me?”

  Jessi chewed her lower lip and nodded, her eyes sparkling.

  “Jessi, you are something else,” Judd laughed.

  LATER THAT AFTERNOON, Judd left Jessi relaxing by the pool, with a promise of a nice dinner out for their last night in Key West, as he went to meet Mateo for coffee.

  “Thank you again for your help last night,” Judd said as he sat across from his friend at the same table they’d used previously.

  “It was my pleasure.” Mateo smirked at Judd. “You broke the rules, you know. Condoms are required at all times at The Castle.”

  “That,” Judd grimaced, rubbing the back of his neck, “was unplanned. I just...needed to take her back.”

  The other man chuckled lightly. “I see. I suppose we can overlook it just this once. How is your lovely sub today?”

  Judd smiled. “She’s great. We both slept late this morning, and I left her resting by the pool. She was pretty worn out last night.”

  “Did she enjoy our scene?” Mateo’s gaze was intense.

  “Yes. She called it ‘mind-blowing’ as a matter of fact.”

  Mateo visibly relaxed. “I’m pleased that she had a good time.”

  “I’m pretty sure she’s not up for another ménage, though. She seemed to think it was a one-time fantasy kind of thing. And in all honesty,” Judd smiled sadly, “it was harder than I thought it would be to share her with you.”

  “She is a beautiful woman,” his friend observed. “I envy you, my friend, finding a submissive who is both a lover and a friend.”

  Judd nodded. “I’m a lucky man. But I have no doubt that you could find the same.”

  Mateo shook his head and gazed out across the street. “I do not think that is my path.”

  Coffee finished, the two men shook hands and parted ways, with Judd promising to visit again soon.

  Chapter 44

  After Jessi and Judd returned from the Keys, Jessi shifted into high gear finalizing arrangements for Alex and Trish’s wedding. There were schedules to check, food and liquor to order, and a vast myriad of other details to manage. An inveterate perfectionist, she would have checked and rechecked anyway, but because this wedding was for friends, she felt added pressure to get it right.

  Since their night at The Castle, she and Judd had discovered a deeper intimacy, and she found that she spent at least a couple of nights a week at his place. Buddy was always thrilled to visit Judd, spending his time chasing birds on the beach until he wore himself out.

  They also completed the final chore on Graham’s list by taking down the battered old ceiling fan over Jessi’s bed, replacing it with an ornate silver chandelier. They’d celebrated by enjoying cocktails at Square Grouper, and watching the lighthouse across the inlet. Then they’d gone to Judd’s and made love for hours.

  Occasionally, Jessi had a few private misgivings about the threesome she and Judd had shared with Master Mateo. It wasn’t like her, and she wondered what people would think, Sarah for example, if they knew about it. But she pushed aside her doubts and went on about the business of ensuring a beautiful wedding for their friends.

  Finally, the day arrived. Jessi made several trips to drop off decorations and centerpieces. Then she returned home to get ready. When her hair and makeup were finished, she slipped on her bridesmaid’s dress, a sleeveless, full-length, pale green lace confection that showed off her sensuous curves. It had been some time since Jessi had served as anyone’s bridesmaid, and it was the first time she could recall loving the dress.

  Judd knocked just as she finished getting ready. She opened the door and felt a rush of desire as he smiled at her. As Alex’s best man, he was beyond handsome in his charcoal grey tux with a crisp white shirt and a long black silk tie.

  He stared at her wide-eyed. “You look like a dream, Jessi.”

  “You’re not so bad yourself, hot stuff,” she sassed, winking at him.

  “I’ve got about half a mind to kidnap you back to my place, where I can do unspeakably debauched things to you,” he quipped, pulling her to him and kissing her softly.

  “After we get through this wedding, you’re on,” she laughed.

  A BRISK WARM BREEZE buffeted the wedding party on the deck of the boat. Jessi was happy she’d opted for an updo, although she’d probably have to do some repairs once the ceremony was over. Alex and Trish faced the officiant beneath a tulle-draped arch, bathed in the pink-orange glow of the setting sun.

  But Jessi’s eyes were on Judd, standing just on the other side of Alex. Throughout the ceremony, his gaze strayed in her direction, too, and she thought he looked pensive, as though mulling something over.

  Not marriage, surely. We’ve never even brought it up. Her tummy did a little flip at the idea. He’d been clear early on that marriage was not on his radar. And as a widow, she wasn’t sure it was something she wanted to think about.

  She shook her head dismissively. It’s the wedding effect. Suddenly everyone gets all emotional. Get a couple of cocktails in you and you’ll forget the whole idea.

  Following the ceremony, guests were invited to file down to the dining room on the lower deck for wine and hors d’oeuvres while the wedding party posed for photos. Judd stood beside Jessi, posing dutifully for the camera, his hand planted firmly on her ass.

  “No giggling now,” he teased, “these are very serious wedding pictures.”

  With photos completed, they headed down to join the rest of the guests for dinner.

  Chapter 45

  From where he was seated at a round table by the windows of the lower deck, he could see Alex and Trish in the center of the room, lost in each other’s eyes as they danced to Michael Buble’s version of Witchcraft.

  He felt genuine happiness for the pair of them. They were so in love, they simply completed each other. He didn’t fail to notice the nag of longing in the pit of his soul.

  Judd watched as Jessi made her way across the small dancefloor in the center of the dining room. She looked beautiful in the pale green bridesmaid’s dress. She looked beautiful, no matter what she wore, he knew from experience.

  During the ceremony, standing on opposite sides of the minister as Trish and Alex said their vows, Judd as best man, Jessi as a bridesmaid, Judd realized that he wanted that same thing. He wanted a forever with Jessi.

  He sighed deeply. It was complicated. She’d been widowed for a little over a year. Not that they were worried about convention or what other people might think. But were they ready for marriage yet? He still had doubts that were rooted in the way his own marriage had gone down in flames.

  He swiped a restless hand across his lips. They hadn’t even discussed the possibility. But at the very least, it was time to make their relationship more permanent. It was time they moved in together.

  What about the logistics, though? Would she agree to move into his townhouse? God, he loved being on the ocean. It was what he’d wanted his whole life.

  She’d have to let go of the house. It was a discussion they hadn’t had. But no way could Judd move in there. Graham was everywhere. So far, he’d managed to avoid having to make love to Jessi in Graham’s bed.

  But the more he considered it, this must have been what Graham had had in mind. The whole list of jobs around the house—it was designed to get the place ready to sell.

  Jessi deftly dodged the dancers, making a beeline for their table. When she caught his eye, she smiled fondly, her green eyes sparkling in the light of the reception room. Without effort, his own smile matched hers.

  “Hey, there, handsome,” she greeted him, planting a light kiss on his cheek.

  “There’s my Angel,” he smiled, sliding a chair out for her. “Is
everything running smoothly?”

  “Oh, you know, it wouldn’t be a wedding if there wasn’t a snafu or two, but I think it’s all worked out. I’m ready to sit for a few minutes.”

  “Are you? I was just going to ask you to dance.”

  “You could probably talk me into it.” She gave him a sideways smirk.

  “Or I could just tell you, Angel, we’re dancing now.” He arched his eyebrow in faux menace.

  “Yes, Sir, you could do that.” She smiled warmly, while her hand went unbidden to the delicate silver day collar she wore, a thin silver chain with a small heart lock hanging from it.

  He rose and held out his hand, and she took it, standing and allowing him to lead her to the dancefloor. The music switched to a slow Norah Jones song and Judd pulled Jessi close, tucking her head below his chin. She could feel him humming along as they swayed and she sighed as she gave herself over to the moment, feeling safe and cherished.

  As the song ended, Judd looked down at her. “Let’s go get some air, shall we?”

  Hand in hand, they made their way upstairs and through the main salon to the open aft, where they had an unobstructed view of the star-dusted midnight velvet sky over the Intracoastal Waterway. Thankfully, they had the place to themselves as the wedding guests were enjoying the music below deck. Judd selected a sofa and they sat, his arm resting on the back of the couch while Jessi nestled against him. The evening air had a slight chill even though the calendar said it was late August.

  “It was a beautiful wedding, Jessi. All your hard work really paid off. I know Alex and Trish are happy with everything.”

  “Oh, I hope so. It all seemed to come together nicely.” She sighed. “They seem so happy together.”

  Nodding, Judd cleared his throat. “You know, Angel, watching them today, watching you today, well... It made me start to think.” He felt her stiffen slightly against his side.

  “Oh?” she said lightly.

  “Yeah.” He shifted slightly to face her, taking both her hands in his. “You know I love you, Jessi. And I think you love me, too. I was thinking that maybe it’s time we took the next step, and you know, moved in together.”

  Jessi released the breath she’d been holding. The idea of a marriage proposal frightened her, so she was relieved when he suggested that they might move in together. She gazed thoughtfully at their intertwined hands before looking back up at him. Smiling slowly, she nodded. “I think that would be great.”

  Her eyes sparkled in the glow from the string of lights overhead. “There’s room in the garage for your surfboards and things, and Graham’s closet is just sitting there empty, and...”

  Judd held up a hand. “Whoa, wait a minute,” he said softly. “I thought maybe you could move in with me on the beach. Or, better yet, we can find a place of our own, but I have to tell you, I really love being right on the ocean.”

  Jessi blinked uncomprehendingly. “But...what about my house?”

  He shrugged slightly. “You sell it. Think about it Jessi. All those chores Graham listed? What were they designed to do?” He fixed her with his soft brown eyes. “To get the house ready to sell.”

  She shook her head. “No, I don’t think so. Those were just... Well, they were things that needed to be done. But surely you don’t expect me to sell my home. I mean, it’s where I live, it’s where I raised my kids.”

  Her voice grew louder. “It’s my children’s home, for Christ’s sake.”

  “Jessi, Cara and Adam haven’t lived there in years,” he said reasonably.

  Abruptly, Jessi stood. “I don’t...I can’t talk about this now.” She took a few steps toward the salon doors.

  “Jessi, wait.”

  She shook her head. “I have to see to the guests, make sure everything is going smoothly. We’ll be back at the dock soon.” Heading into the salon, she didn’t look back at him.

  Eyes wide, Judd leaned back, resting his arms on the back of the couch. “What the hell just happened?”

  When he caught his breath, he returned below deck to find Jessi. She was talking to the bride and groom, who were getting ready to leave as soon as the boat docked.

  As she talked, she smiled, but Judd didn’t miss the strained look around her eyes. Others may not have noticed it, but he knew her better than she knew herself. Because he loved her. Dammit, he loved her, which is how this whole mess started.

  The boat docked back where they’d started, and the gangplank was lowered. Wedding guests were assembled on either side, filling the air with bubbles from tiny wedding favor bottles, as the bride and groom disembarked. Everyone waved their goodbyes as Alex and Trish rode off in a limousine, headed for, Judd knew, a hotel in Ft. Lauderdale that night, and leaving on a Caribbean cruise the following afternoon.

  Jessi busied herself gathering up decorations and vases, avoiding his eyes as she did. Wordlessly, he helped her box up what they needed, and they loaded everything into the truck.

  As they drove away, Judd spoke up. “Listen, Jessi, I...”

  “I’m not selling my house.” Her voice was sharp. “I can’t even believe you suggested it.” Her eyes were hard.

  “That’s not what I intended to say. All I wanted to say was that I’d like for us to live together.”

  “Fine. I get it. So you can move into my house.” She crossed her arms in front of her.

  Her tone irritated the Dominant in him. His response came out sharper than he’d planned. “No, I can’t just move into your house. First of all, I don’t want to live there. It’s miles away from the beach. And, Jesus, Jessi...Graham is everywhere in that house. There’s no getting away from him.”

  He glanced at her. “Haven’t you ever wondered why we’ve never had sex in your bedroom? Haven’t you wondered that? Because I will not make love to you in your husband’s bed.”

  Jessi gaped at him. “So, is that it? Are you domming this? Are you going to force me to sell my house?”

  “God, no, of course not, Jessi. I would never do that. Please...” He took a deep breath. “Let’s cool off a little and talk about it rationally.”

  “Oh, my God,” she muttered. “What have I been thinking?”

  They pulled into Jessi’s driveway, and she opened the door immediately, jumping down from the truck before he even put it in ‘park’. She yanked open the door to the back seat and started taking boxes out.

  “Here, let me help you with that,” Judd offered quietly.

  “I wouldn’t dream of it,” she snapped. “I’d never force you to come into my house, what with Graham everywhere.”

  “Jesus, Jessi, please,” he responded.

  She shook her head. “I can’t believe I’ve been so foolish.”

  Judd frowned. “What do you mean?”

  She gestured toward him. “Look at you. You’re young, you’re handsome and athletic. What was I thinking?”

  “Jessi, you’re only five years older than me. That’s it. And it’s never made any difference.”

  She covered her face with her hands. “All the things I’ve done. Surfing, diving,” she looked to him, “Key West. Oh, for God’s sake, I can’t believe I did that!”

  He took a step toward her. “What are you saying, Jessi?”

  “I’m saying,” she hissed, “that I forgot who I was. I’m not some young bimbo, running all over and acting like a fool. I’m Jessi Crenshaw, respectable wife and mother. Successful business owner. Not some...”

  “What?” he snapped. “Not some what?”

  “Not some push-over submissive who just lets herself get talked into anything and everything.” There was challenge in her eyes.

  “Did I do that to you, Angel? Did I talk you into anything you didn’t want to do?” His tone said, ‘challenge accepted.’ “As I recall, you were ‘all systems go’ in Key West.”

  She shook her head, and he didn’t like the hollow look in her eyes. “I can’t do this anymore. This isn’t working for me.” She fixed him pointedly. “Goodbye, Judd.”
>
  He watched her stride across the lawn to her front door. “Wait, Jessi, let’s talk about this.”

  She unlocked the front door and went inside without looking back.

  Stunned, Judd simply stood beside the truck as he watched the lights blink off inside the house. Finally, he walked back around the truck, got in, and drove off into the night.

  AFTER HE GOT HOME, Judd tried to call Jessi but she didn’t pick up. He texted that he’d call her in the morning, and spent a restless night tossing and turning, trying to come up with a solution to their issues.

  By 7:00 the next morning, he couldn’t wait any longer, dialing Jessi’s number. Again, she didn’t pick up, so he left a message. “Hi Angel, it’s me. Listen, I’m worried. Please call me so we can talk. Okay?”

  A minute later, his phone blipped to indicate a text message.

  Don’t call me again.

  Cold washed over him like a wave. Just like that, Don’t call me again. What the hell happened? He sank onto the couch, leaned his elbows on his thighs, and held his head in his hands.

  Chapter 46

  Jessi stared at herself in the bathroom mirror. She’d been trying to remove her makeup but her hand wouldn’t stop shaking.

  What have I done?

  Drawing in a ragged breath, she slid to the floor as her knees buckled, and she curled on her side, legs hugged tightly to her chest. A keening cry escaped her lips as she dissolved into sobs.

  Who did I think I was? How did I lose track of my life like I did? Surfing. Seriously? Showing up half-naked at a BDSM club? I’m forty-fucking-six years old. Acting like I was a twenty-year-old... Like I was some kind of cheap character in a trashy novel.

  But she had loved him. Judd. And Graham. Both of them. It was too confusing. The idea of selling her home made her feel queasy. How could he demand that she do it?

  He didn’t demand, the voice of reason whispered in her mind.

  Jessi howled angrily. But he made it clear that was what he wanted me to do.