Twin Desire

by Michelle Iannarelli

  “That’s why I need to make certain that I have a strong team in place before I move forward.”

  “I think I know where this conversation is going.”

  “Now, before you say no, hear me out.”

  Cheyenne smiled. “I’m listening.”

  “I’d love for you to head up my legal team.”

  “I’m flattered that you’d consider me…”

  “It’s not a consideration, I’ve already approached the board. Cheyenne, the position is yours if you want it.”

  “I don’t know what to say.”

  “Say that you’ll think about it and give me an answer when you’re ready.”

  Cheyenne hugged Bill. “Thank you so much. Not just for this, but for everything that you and Bett have done for me.”

  Jonny hated that he needed a wheelchair. He decided that since he was able to handle standing in the shower that he was capable of hopping to the bathroom. He made it halfway across the room before he lost his balance, stepped onto the bad leg and let out a yelp in pain. “AGHHH!”

  Cheyenne was on her way up with some pie Bett had baked for Jonny when she heard his cry. She practically flew into his room. “Jon!”

  “I’m ok.”

  Cheyenne put down the pie. “Let me help you.” She reached for his elbow.

  Jonny pulled his arm away. “I’m not a fucking cripple.”

  Cheyenne stepped back. “Ok. Your mom sent up pie and Cole said to give him a call. I’ll be downstairs.” Cheyenne headed for the door.

  “Wait, Chey, I’m sorry.”

  “I’ll check in on you later.” Cheyenne rolled his wheelchair over to him before leaving.

  Cole turned off the news, rolled over and his phone rang. “Cole Black.”

  “Jonny Black.”

  “Hey, Bro! How are you feeling?”

  “Like a fucking cripple.”

  “Jeez, J. Tell me how you really feel.”

  “I hate not being able to help myself.”

  “Look, I’m sure mom is thrilled to be taking care of you. Why don’t you relax and enjoy it?”

  “I’m so miserable, J, I yelled at Chey and all she did was bring me pie.”

  “How’s she doing?”

  “I don’t know. Sometimes it’s like she’s fine and other times I feel like she’s keeping something from me.”

  “Like what?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “She’s had a lot to deal with between her father’s death and…J, I have to call you back.”

  “You ok?”

  “I need to grab this call.”

  “Take care.”

  Cole hung up and exhaled. He almost slipped about what had happened.

  Two weeks later…

  “Are you sure…”

  Jonny turned to his mother and smiled. “Yes, Mom, I’m sure. I’ve been here way too long and all I want to do is sleep in my own bed.”

  “What if I come stay at your house for a few nights?”

  “I love you, Mom, I do, but I’m ok.”

  Cheyenne came bouncing into the room with Jonny’s duffle bag. “Ok, let’s get you home.”

  Bett smiled. “Maybe you’d feel better if Cheyenne stayed with you?”

  “I could if…if you want?”

  Jonny looked between his mother and Cheyenne and shook his head. “You two! Ok, but just for tonight until I get settled in.”

  Bett breathed a sigh of relief and then grabbed Jonny to hug him and nearly knocked him over.

  “Whoa! Mom!”

  Cheyenne and Bett steadied Jonny. “I’m sorry, Dear.”

  “I’m just getting used to this damn walker myself.”

  “Crutches just aren’t an option with those ribs still healing. Plus, its only for another two weeks and then you can use a cane.”

  “I guess anything is better than a wheelchair.”

  “I’ll go grab a few things and be right back.”

  “Come sit while you wait.”

  Cheyenne packed her bag, headed out into the hallway and stopped when she reached Cole’s bedroom. She walked inside and sat on his bed and closed her eyes. How could she miss him so much when he threw her away? Cheyenne ran her hands through her hair, stood and looked around. “Nope, I won’t let myself miss you, Cole.”

  “You can’t turn off your feelings.”

  “Bill, I didn’t know you were home.”

  “I didn’t know that anyone was in here until I heard you talking to yourself.”

  “The door was open.”

  “I miss him too.”

  Cheyenne looked up at Bill. “I wish he hadn’t run away.”

  “That’s Coleman though. Jonathan always fixed everything for him. This time Jonathan was the problem, so Coleman ran.”

  “But I could have helped him.”

  “Maybe it’s time that he helps himself?”

  Cheyenne nodded her head.

  Bill leaned over and picked up her bag. “Come on, I’ve got your bag.”

  Cheyenne looked around the room one last time and then she stopped by the dresser next to the door and picked up a photo of her and Cole. It was a photo of them at Cole’s wrestling banquet, the same night she lost her virginity to Cole. She quickly wiped away a tear that snuck out and then placed the picture into her purse before heading downstairs.

  Jonny took a sip of his wine. “Dinner was delicious.”

  “Jon, it was tuna noodle casserole.” Cheyenne laughed.

  “I know but it was the best I’ve ever had.”

  “If you had any food in the house besides noodles and canned tuna you never would have had it.”

  “Not a fan of tuna and noodles?”

  “I prefer my tuna with mayonnaise on toast and my noodles with butter and breadcrumbs.”

  “Ok, so we can have that tomorrow night.” Jonny laughed.

  “Tomorrow night, huh?”

  Jonny looked down. “You don’t have to…”

  Cheyenne reached her hand over and placed it onto Jonny’s. “I want to.”

  Jonny looked up. “Are you sure?”

  “Look, I know we agreed to take this slow but no matter what happens you will always be my friend and I want to take care of you.”

  “Then tuna on toast for lunch tomorrow?”

  “No, I’m going shopping first thing in the morning and getting you some real food.”

  “We just had real food.”

  “You need fruit and vegetables. Carbs and proteins are not exactly a well-balanced diet.”

  “Who told you that, some quack doctor!” Jonny let out a laugh.

  “No, a young boy who used to pick me fresh strawberries from his mother’s garden.”

  “Hmmm. Smart kid.” Jonny winked.

  Cheyenne giggled thinking back to the day Jonny surprised her with a basket of strawberries. How did she not know then how much he cared about her?

  Jonny groaned as he made his way down the hall into his room. “I hate this!”

  “You do realize that you are supposed to be using the walker and not just pushing it in front of you?”

  “My knee is feeling better and I don’t know why I need this damn walker.”

  “Because your doctor said so!”

  “He’s a jerk.” Jonny left the walker a few feet from his bed and hopped over and onto the bed. He kicked off his slippers and then pulled his shirt over his head.

  Cheyenne stared at his bare chest a moment too long. Jonny tossed his shirt at her. “I’m sorry, I was…”

  “Busted for drooling.” Jonny laughed.

  “I wasn’t drooling.” Cheyenne tossed the shirt back at Jonny. “Can I get you anything before I head to bed?”

  “Yeah, come here.” Jonny reached out his hand.

  Cheyenne closed the distance between them. “What do you need?”

  Jonny smiled up at her. “You!” Then he tugged her down by her hand and kissed her.

  “Cole…hate you…she’s mine…no…stop…” />
  Cheyenne rolled over and ran her hand through Jonny’s hair. “Hey, wake up, Jon.”

  Jonny opened his eyes. “Shit! Did I wake you?”

  “It’s ok.”

  “I keep having these crazy nightmares. Then when I wake up, I can’t really remember them. I hate it.”

  “Jon, maybe it’s better you don’t remember. It probably has to do with your accident.”

  Jonny pulled himself up. “What happened to me was not an accident. It was intentional. That much I know.”

  Cheyenne felt so guilty. Jonny was suffering both mentally and physically because of her. Maybe it was time to tell him the truth? “Jon, I’m so sorry I…”

  Jonny could see the tears in Cheyenne’s eyes. “Oh, Chey, I don’t blame you.” Jonny reached for Cheyenne. He held her in his arms and kissed her forehead. “All that really matters is that we found our way back to one another.”

  “Jon, I…”

  Jonny silenced her with a kiss.

  Cheyenne waited until Jonny drifted off to sleep. She wiggled out of his arms and then managed to leave the bedroom without waking him. After powering on the coffee pot, she reached for her phone. She needed to talk to Cole.

  Cole looked down at his phone. He declined the call the first time but when it rang again, he decided that maybe it was important, so he answered. “Is everything ok?”

  “No, it’s not.”

  “Is it J? My parents?”

  “Cole, I need to tell Jon the truth.”

  “NO! We agreed not to.”

  “I know but he’s having nightmares and I hate lying to him.”

  “J not remembering is a blessing. You telling him is only going to hurt him…and you, because he might not be able to forgive you.”

  “It’s better than him being upset because of the unknown, and Cole, I don’t want a relationship built on a lie.”

  “So, you’re in a relationship now?”

  “Cole…”

  “None of my business. Forget I asked.”

  “I don’t know what’s going on between us.”

  “You fucking him, Chey?”

  “Cole…”

  “That’s a yes.”

  “I…”

  “Look, do what you have to do.” Cole didn’t wait for a response before ending the call.

  Cheyenne put down the phone and then pulled the picture of her and Cole out of her purse. How was she ever going to figure out her feelings?

  Jonny rolled over, slid his hand between Cheyenne’s legs and slipped a finger inside her. “Time to wake up!”

  “Mmm!” Cheyenne spread her legs and then kissed Jonny.

  Jonny dragged his lips down Cheyenne’s neck. “I want to be inside you.”

  “I can help you with that.” Cheyenne rolled over and then she straddled Jonny. “Your knee ok?”

  “Yup.” Jonny pulled Cheyenne down and kissed her.

  Cheyenne pushed back against Jonny’s cock. “Good morning!”

  Jonny impaled her. “It is now.”

  Cheyenne bit her lip and closed her eyes. “Co…oh coming!” She almost yelled out Cole’s name. What the hell! Where did that come from? She’d been with Jonny for a month now. It was time to sort through her feelings.

  “Chey, do you want a cup of coffee for the road?”

  Cheyenne walked into the kitchen. “Sure.”

  Jonny poured her a cup and turned to hand it to her. “You ok?”

  “I need to go home…it’s time.”

  “Hey, just because I’m going back to work doesn’t mean that you have to leave.”

  “I need to go. Jon, I dropped everything when I got the phone call about my father’s death. I haven’t really dealt with anything. I have all these feelings and I need to…” Cheyenne burst into tears.

  Jonny hugged her. “Chey, don’t cry. You’re not alone. I can help you with anything you need. I don’t have to go back to work today. I can go over to your father’s and help you.”

  “You’re so sweet and I know that you would do anything for me, but Jon, I need to go home to Boston not my father’s home.”

  Jonny pulled away. “So that’s it. We’re done?”

  “No, Jon, I just need some time.”

  “And then you’re coming back?”

  “I’d like to.” Cheyenne looked down. She knew she was hurting Jonny and it broke her heart.

  “But not to me?” Jonny walked out.

  Cheyenne was leaning up against Jonny’s car in the driveway. “Thought maybe you decided to skip work.”

  “I thought you left.”

  “Jon, I need to do this. I have a practice and a home in Boston that I abruptly walked out on almost two months ago.”

  “I can move to Boston if…”

  “Give me some time to sort things out. Please?”

  “I thought we did.”

  “I don’t want to hurt you, Jon. That’s why I need to be certain that I’m doing the right thing. My emotions are all over the place. I need to reign them in.”

  “Tell me, did you only stay because you felt responsible for…”

  “No!”

  “Then why now? Why not weeks ago?”

  “I wanted to make sure that you were alright and wouldn’t need me.”

  “Just because I can walk on my own doesn’t mean that I don’t need you.”

  Cheyenne raised her hand up and placed it onto Jonny’s cheek. “I know and I’m going to miss you but Jon, please understand, I need to grieve. My father died, we reconnected, I broke up with Aaron, and you almost died. I just need some time.”

  Jonny realized he was being selfish and not considering Cheyenne’s feelings. “You’re right. I’m a selfish prick and want to keep you here because deep down I’m afraid that if I let you go that I’ll lose you.”

  Cheyenne hugged Jonny. “Oh, Jon. I love you.”

  “I love you too, Chey.”

  Kelsey and Laney were waiting inside Jonny’s office with balloons and donuts. “SURPRISE!”

  Jonny dropped his coffee. “SHIT!”

  “Jonny, I didn’t mean for us to scare you.” Kelsey picked up the cup from the floor.

  “Yeah, we’re sorry.” Laney grabbed some napkins, knelt and started to wipe up the coffee from the floor.

  Jonny leaned forward just as Laney sprung up and their cheeks smacked against one another. “Whoa!”

  Laney was mortified. She stepped back and let out a shriek. “Oh, my God! Doctor…uh…Doctor Bbblack, I’m so sorry.”

  Jonny reached out his hands and placed them onto Laney’s shoulders. “I’m sorry. It’s my fault. Are you alright?” He reached his hand up and rubbed his thumb across her cheek. “Let me get you some ice.”

  “NO! I mean I can get it myself.” Laney skirted around Jonny and bolted out the door.

  Kelsey giggled.

  “What?”

  “Still don’t think she has a crush on you?”

  “That again. No, I think she is just a nice woman who was afraid I’d yell at her.”

  “Uh huh!” Kelsey shook her head as she walked out the door.

  Jonny limped over to his desk. He looked down at the donuts and smiled.

  Cheyenne sat waiting for her car to arrive at the airport. She looked around and thought about the last time she was there and how different her life was. She was still in a relationship with Aaron. Now she was in love with two men, neither of which was Aaron. She reached into her purse for her phone to call Jonny and let him know she landed safely when she stumbled upon Cole’s picture. Did she still really love him or was it just that she couldn’t have him that drove her crazy? The ringing of her phone pulled her from that thought. “Hello!”

  “Forgot me already?”

  “I had my hand on the phone and was just about to call you. We landed a few minutes ago.”

  “I miss you already.”

  “I miss you too. How’s work?”

  “My first full day back started with Kelsey and Laney yel
ling surprise and me dropping my coffee onto the floor.”

  “Oh no!”

  “Yeah, but they left me donuts and balloons and Kelsey stopped back with a fresh cup of coffee for me.”

  “See, you don’t need me to take care of you.”

  “Chey, Kelsey’s married, and I’d never cheat on you.”

  “I didn’t mean it like that. I meant you have friends who care about you.”

  “Oh.”

  “My car just pulled up. I’ll call you tonight.”

  Cole hung up the phone with his father and kicked his desk. He wasn’t ready to go back home. Not now, maybe not ever. The mere thought of his brother making love to Cheyenne ripped his heart out. He certainly didn’t want to be a spectator in their lives. He reached for his phone and called his mother.

  “Coleman, how are you?”

  “I’m ok, Mom.”

  “You don’t sound ok. What’s the matter?”

  “Dad called and told me that he needs me to come home to close the Fitch deal.”

  “You’re coming home? I’ve missed you so much, Dear.”

  “I miss you too, Mom, but I’m not ready to see Cheyenne. Especially not if she’s with J.”

  “About that. Cheyenne went back home to Boston this morning.”

  “She did? Why?”

  “Jonathan said that she needed time to think.”

  “How’s J doing?”

  “He was upset but said he understood.”

  “What does she need to think about?”

  “Why don’t you ask her?”

  “Mom…”

  “Don’t Mom me. Listen, the three of you are grown adults and you should be honest with yourselves and each other.”

  “Yeah, and what if we both want her, then what?”

  “Then she needs to choose.”

  “That’s why I left, to make it easy on her.”

  “Or was it to make it easy on you, Coleman?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “It was easier for you to run than to stay and have her hurt you.”

  “I left for J.”