Christian (The Beck Brothers Series)

by Andria Large

  He almost made it to the door before Shea caught up with him. He slammed into him, pinning him face first against the door. Both of them were panting and Christian was still trying to get away, but Shea held fast.

  “Chris, listen to me, you need to calm down,” Shea said calmly.

  Christian pressed his face against the door. “Why are you doing this to me? Just let me go,” he said, his voice pained.

  Shea’s heart ached for him, but he wasn’t going to let him run and possibly ruin what they have together.

  “Baby, I am never letting you go. I can’t. I may not know exactly how to label myself, and I really don’t give a fuck. But I do know one thing, and that is that I am in love with you, Christian. And we have something special together that I refuse to let you walk away from,” Shea said softly against Christian’s ear.

  “You’re just saying that so I won’t break up with you,” Christian rasped.

  “No, dammit! I’m saying it because I fucking mean it.”

  “I don’t believe you,” Christian whispered.

  Shea turned him around, grabbed fistfuls of his shirt and slammed his back up against the door. Christian’s brown eyes were shimmering with unshed tears. The hurt and betrayal in them tore at Shea’s heart.

  “Get off of me, Shea, I mean it,” Christian said, his voice hollow. He pushed Shea hard, forcing him to back away and opened the door. “We’re done,” he snapped before walking out and slamming the door behind him.

  Shea blinked at the door. What the fuck just happened? A sharp ache took root in his chest and he swore he could literally feel his heart breaking. Christian just broke up with him. Holy fucking shit! It was over, their relationship and friendship was over. That wasn’t possible! Shea was in love with him! He lunged for the door and tore it open but Christian was already gone. No! This couldn’t be happening!

  Shea stared up at the ceiling as he lay on his sheet-less mattress in his bedroom later that night. He had tried to call Christian multiple times but his phone was off. He didn’t want to go over there just yet, Christian needed some space and time to calm down. He had worked himself up over nothing - at least, Shea thought it was nothing - but, obviously, Christian thought it was a huge thing. There was no way in hell Shea was going to let Christian go without a fight. Right?

  Was he really positive that this relationship was what he wanted? Could he really go on without being with a woman ever again? He was completely satisfied with Christian, he hadn’t even once thought about a woman while he was with Christian. Maybe he should go be with one just to make sure. No, no, that was a bad idea. Christian would never forgive him if he went out and slept with a chick right after they broke up, that was just a dumb idea. Plus, he wasn’t sure if he could do a woman now, not after being with Christian.

  What he did know was that he needed Christian in his life. But could Christian be right? Was he in this relationship for the wrong reasons? Yes, he didn’t want to lose Christian as a friend, but they had been having fun being together over the last couple of months. He could picture himself with Christian long term and he was honestly in love with him. Shea knew Christian well enough to know that he had left because he always thought that the relationship was doomed, and he was going to end it before it went on any longer. Well, guess fucking what? This was not the end, and Shea would be damned if he let Christian throw away what they had together because he was scared.

  Shea couldn’t sleep at all that night. He was useless at work the next day, too. He was so exhausted from not sleeping and completely distracted by thoughts of Christian and what he was going to do if he wouldn’t take him back. The possibility that Christian wouldn’t take him back scared the ever-living shit out of him. Shea didn’t know what he would do without Christian in his life.

  After work, Shea dragged his ass home and collapsed on his couch. Fuck taking a shower, he didn’t have the energy. His heart hurt so badly. This was the longest he’s gone without talking to Christian in…shit…years. He’s never had a break up effect him so horribly, but this wasn’t just anyone who broke up with him, this was Christian - his best friend, the man he loved with his whole heart and soul.

  Shea closed his eyes as he lay on his couch. Maybe he should call Quinn, tell him what’s going on, and see if he could help? Shea covered his face with his hands. Shit! No, he couldn’t do that to Christian. He couldn’t tell Quinn that they were together. Christian would hate him for that. He was going to have to deal with this on his own.

  Shea gave Christian a few days before he went over there. Shea had tried again to call but Christian was not answering his phone. Shea walked up the steps to Christian’s front door and tried to use his key, but it wouldn’t work. Christian changed the fucking locks! Jesus, he wasn’t fucking around when he said that they were done. Shea pounded his fist on the door, knowing Christian was home because his car was in the driveway.

  “Chris! Open the damn door!” Shea called and pounded on the door some more.

  A minute later, the door opened. Shea sucked in a sharp breath at the sight of Christian’s disheveled appearance. His hair was a mess, he had about three days worth of stubble on his face, his eyes were bloodshot and puffy, and he was in a ratty T-shirt and pajama pants. Shea has never ever seen Christian look like this, he was obviously suffering as much as he was.

  “Your shit is in the garage,” Christian muttered and went to shut the door, but Shea stopped it with his shoulder.

  “Whoa, hold the fuck up, I’m not here to get my stuff, I’m here to talk,” Shea said firmly.

  “I don’t want to talk to you.” Christian snarled and tried to push the door closed, but Shea held it open.

  “I love you, Christian. I don’t want to be without you. I’m sorry I didn’t tell Tara, I chickened out, okay, I’m sorry,” Shea said.

  “You’re nothing but a liar and I don’t believe anything you say,” Christian snapped. “Now, go away.”

  “Dammit, Christian! You’ve known me for over twenty years! You know I am not a liar!” Shea yelled and shoved at the door, making Christian stumble back. Shea walked into the house and slammed the door shut behind him.

  “You just want me to suck your dick and let you fuck me. I don’t mean anything else to you, you don’t love me, you were just trying to keep me around so you wouldn’t lose me as a friend.” Christian sneered.

  “Of course I don’t want to lose you as a friend, I fucking love you! I love you and I’m in love with you. What the hell can I do to make you understand that? What can I do to prove to you that I am in love with you? Do you need to fuck me? Will that make you believe me? Well let’s fucking do it,” Shea snapped, holding his arms out.

  Christian sucked in a sharp breath and his eyes widened. “You’re not serious.”

  “I am very serious. I want you to make love to me right now. I want to prove to you that I am in this relationship because I love you, and I will do anything to be your boyfriend again,” Shea said, hoping Christian heard the certainty in his voice.

  Christian swallowed hard. “Shea…I swear to god, if you are fucking with me, I will never speak to you again.”

  “Dammit, Christian! Do I look like I’m fucking with you?” Shea snapped. What the hell more could he do to get through to this guy?

  Shea grabbed Christian’s scruffy face and kissed him like never before. He poured all of the love and adoration that he felt for his best friend into the kiss. His arms snaked around Christian’s neck, and his fingers tangled into the hair at the back of his head. Christian moaned and wrapped his arms around Shea’s waist, crushing him to him. Their tongues intertwined and their teeth bumped. Shea could feel Christian’s heart pounding against his chest.

  They stumbled up the stairs still wrapped in each other’s arms. After bumping into a couple of walls, they found their way into Christian’s bedroom, where they fell into his bed. Shea landed on his back with Christian falling on top of him. Christian immediately pushed to his knees and started
tearing off Shea’s clothes. Within seconds, Shea was naked and screaming as Christian deep throated him. Holy fucking shit!

  Christian sucked him hard and fast, making him come within minutes. While he lay there sucking in air, Christian undressed and grabbed the lube. Shea watched him as he opened the lube and poured some in his hand. He smoothed it over himself as he put the bottle on the nightstand. Christian slowly stroked himself, while standing next to the bed, looking down at Shea through heavy lidded eyes.

  “I’m giving you one last chance here, Shea. If you don’t want this, say so now,” Christian murmured quietly.

  Shea shook his head. “I want it. I want you…all of you, always.”

  Christian closed his eyes and swallowed hard as he nodded. He then climbed onto the mattress and between Shea’s legs. Shea’s heart was ready to pound out of his chest. He was actually seriously afraid of the pain, but he was doing his best to hide it. What if it hurt so badly that he couldn’t take it? Would Christian leave him because of that? God, he hoped not.

  Christian leaned over him, planting one hand next to his head. “I’m going to use my fingers first to open you up a bit,” he whispered.

  Shea’s gut clenched and all he could do was nod. He has never had anything up his ass before, not even a doctor’s finger. Christian spread his legs farther apart and lifted one up higher. Shea just let him do what he wanted, this was all for him. He closed his eyes and took a couple of deep breaths. Next, he felt Christian’s lubed finger run around his hole before he slowly pushed inside. Shea sucked in a sharp breath and grabbed the edge of the mattress behind his head.

  “You okay?” Christian asked quietly as he started to move his finger in and out.

  “It’s weird,” Shea gasped.

  Christian chuckled low, stirring some of Shea’s desire back to life. The longer Christian pumped his finger the better it started to feel. He even added a second finger into the mix, and to Shea’s surprise, it wasn’t all that bad. Christian twisted his fingers and touched something inside that had Shea almost bowing off the bed in pleasure.

  “Holy fuck! What was that?” Shea choked.

  “Your prostate.” He snickered.

  “That was crazy.” Shea breathed.

  “I think you’re ready for more,” Christian growled and removed his fingers.

  Christian bent and captured Shea’s lips. As they kissed, Christian positioned his cock where his fingers had just been. Shea’s heart leapt into his throat. Oh god, oh god, oh god… Christian pressed forward, pushing past the tight muscles trying to keep him out. Christian dragged his mouth over to Shea’s ear.

  “Breathe, baby,” he whispered.

  Shea hadn’t even realized he was holding his breath until he said that. Shea let out a breath and Christian pushed in farther. The sensation of being filled was almost too much to bear. Shea squeezed his eyes closed and bared his teeth, fighting off the urge to tell Christian to stop. He had to do this. He needed Christian to understand how much he loved him.

  Christian finally pressed all the way in, pulling a strangled cry from Shea. It was an odd feeling, not painful really, just full. Christian lifted his face to look down at him. His hands cupped the sides of Shea’s head as he leaned down to kiss him softly on the lips. Their eyes locked as Christian started to move, pulling back slowly before pushing forward a bit faster than the first time. Shea gasped as pleasure burst through him. He clutched the back of Christian’s shoulders as he picked up the pace.

  Shea had no idea that it could feel this good. It was nothing he had ever experienced before and it blew his mind. His eyes fluttered closed and his mouth parted as a moan escaped him. He dug his head back into the pillow and arched his body into Christian, who moaned, also.

  Christian reared up, using one hand to support himself. His other hand wrapped around Shea’s shaft and started pumping. Shea was surprised to find that he was hard again, and now with Christian stroking him along with fucking him, he thought he was going to shatter into a million pieces in ecstasy.

  “Christian! Oh Jesus! Don’t stop!” Shea cried, clawing at the mattress.

  Christian had to grab Shea’s hip when he bowed up off the bed as he exploded. He came so hard that he swore he blacked out for a moment. He could feel himself pulsing around Christian’s cock. Christian let out a guttural shout as he came, thrusting hard into Shea and staying there while he emptied himself into him. Shea couldn’t move, he was utterly drained and could not move a fucking muscle. Christian pulled out causing Shea to whimper at the loss. Christian’s hand smoothed over his short hair and he could feel his breath on his lips, so he knew Christian was close by.

  “I am in love with you, Christian. I can’t live without you. Please believe me,” Shea whispered.

  “I’m sorry I freaked out. I’m just so afraid you’re not in this for the right reasons,” Christian replied.

  “Well I am and I am in love with you, Chris. Please take me back.”

  Christian nodded. “I love you, Shea,” Christian murmured before kissing him languidly.

  “That was incredible.” Shea breathed when their kiss ended.

  “Yes it was.” Christian chuckled.

  Shea cracked his eyes to find Christian smirking down at him. Yeah, he was definitely in love with this guy. Shea grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him down for another kiss.

  “Now, go get me a rag or something. I’m a fucking mess.” Shea grunted.

  Christian laughed, rolled off Shea, and climbed to his feet. Shea watched his boyfriend’s naked ass flex and move as he left the room. Yes, Shea was absolutely in love with Christian, there was no doubt in his mind after what just happened that this was whom he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. No more women for him, he didn’t want them anymore. He only wanted Christian, who now held his heart and soul.

  ~Chapter 6~

  Shea was finally back to work after a long, boring two and a half months. He missed working, hated sitting around on his ass all day. He’s only been back a week and he was already super busy. He went home exhausted every night. So exhausted that he basically would come home, take a shower, and fall into bed by 8:00 pm. His body was no longer used to being beaten to shit every day, and it was going to take him some time to get back into a groove.

  It was a Thursday, and Shea and his guys actually finished a job early. Shea rushed home to take a shower so that he could go over to Christian’s studio and surprise him. He dressed in his usual worn jeans and a vintage T-shirt before heading over to Christian’s downtown studio.

  When he got there, he found a parking spot and walked down the block to the studio. He ascended the few stairs and opened the door. Christian was standing up on a little dais in front of an easel holding a canvas. He explained what he was doing as he was painting. The class behind him was a mixture of men and women of various ages.

  Shea weaved his way through the tables and made his way silently up behind Christian, whose ass was looking mighty fine in a pair of dark jeans. He was also wearing a light green button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. His shirt was tucked in, of course. Shea caught a few curious glances from the students, but he just ignored them. Shea slowly reached forward with both hands and grabbed Christian’s sides where Shea knew he was seriously ticklish.

  Christian cried out in surprise as he jumped almost a foot in the air. His paintbrush made a very dark blue, very out of place streak across the canvas when he jumped. Shea slapped a hand over his mouth as Christian whirled around to glare at him. The students were giggling quietly.

  “I didn’t know you were going to do that! I swear!” Shea exclaimed, trying to hold back his laughter.

  “You scared the crap out of me! What did you think was going to happen?” Christian said in exasperation, tossing his brush on the ledge of the easel.

  “Well, I expected you to jump, not mess up your painting.” Shea winced.

  Christian huffed and stepped off the dais. “Everyone, con
tinue working on that part while I get another canvas.”

  Shea followed Christian into the supply closet and closed the door slightly. As Christian bent over to sort through a variety of canvases stacked on the floor, Shea sidled up behind him. Shea smoothed his hands over Christian’s ass to grab hold of his hips so that he could pull Christian back against his groin.

  “I really like this position,” Shea growled.

  Christian straightened up, canvas in hand, and glanced over his shoulder, giving Shea a wry smile. “What are you doing here, anyway?”

  Shea nuzzled the side of Christian’s face. “I’ve missed you this past week. I got the job done early, so I thought I could take you out for dinner and a movie,” he murmured, kissing Christian’s smooth cheek.

  “Mmm, that sounds like a great idea.” Christian sighed contently and turned in Shea’s arms. “I’ll be done in about half an hour.”

  Shea kissed him softly on the lips. “Okay, good. I can’t wait to have you all to myself.”

  Christian growled low in his throat, sending a shiver of pleasure down Shea’s spine. “Soon, my love, soon,” Christian whispered before nipping at Shea’s bottom lip.

  Christian then left him standing in the supply closet, horny as shit. Shea shifted his semi-hard cock in his jeans and tugged his T-shirt down so it wasn’t noticeable, before leaving the closet. Shea went and sat behind the little desk where Christian did his business transactions and watched him teach. Shea couldn’t help but smile at his boyfriend. He was such an amazing teacher – patient, thorough, and took the time to go around to help each person individually. He would make a great father some day. Shea felt his smile slip slightly; he had no idea if Christian even wanted children, they have yet to talk about that.

  After Christian’s class dispersed, Shea helped him clean up so that they could get out of there faster. They then went to a quiet little Italian restaurant and had a delicious dinner. Finally, after Shea paid for dinner, they were on their way to the movies.