Thai Shorts

by Lilburne, Guy

  Madam Rose lifted her skirt up over her waist. She was not wearing any panties. She bent herself over the piano and said “Fuck me.”

  I would never use such a term and, if anyone else had said it, I surely would have been most disgusted, but Madam Rose was bending over a grand piano with no panties on and her legs apart. It just sounded like the perfect thing to say and it sounded rather sexy. I stood behind her and fumbled more than I would have liked to open the buttons on my trousers, but I managed it and they fell around my ankles. I pushed my swollen penis inside her as deep as I could. I amazed myself because I knew what to do and it truly did feel like the best feeling I have ever had in all my life. If I were to die in my sleep tonight, Dear Diary, then I would surely die as a happy man. When I was making love with Madam Rose she told me that I didn’t have to wait to be asked in future. She said that I could ‘take her’ whenever and wherever I wanted to. I took her five times today - first in the study, over the grand piano, then on the sofa in the sitting room and later in the bathroom and twice in her bedroom. Now I know that she loves me.

  19th July

  Dear Diary, I didn’t die in my sleep last night and today officially awoke as the happiest man in the whole wide world. Madam Rose is teaching me so much. Today I kissed and licked and sucked and tasted every single inch of her body and she did the same to me. I don’t know if other people know the secrets of love that Madam Rose knows and has now shared them with me. I doubt that they do because, if they did, then I suspect that nobody would ever get anything else done, because making love with Madam Rose is the only thing I want to do. Today I took her ten times all over the house. We are becoming completely reckless because the maid was in the house all day and surely it is only a matter of time before she discovers us, but we just don’t care. Madam Rose is two years older than mother, but I love her and I know that when I leave school I will be able to get a good job and take care of her. I know that she will leave Uncle Ernest, because I know that she is in love with me.

  26th July

  Dear Diary, I’m sorry that I haven’t written for a while. I make love with Madam Rose every single day and we usually make love ten times each day. Today the maid did indeed discover us. We were making love in the lounge and I saw the maid watching us from the doorway. I saw her in the mirror over the bookcase. She watched for the longest time. I think she enjoyed the show. I told Madam Rose after we had finished and she laughed. She said in future we would always leave the door open. I do believe that my life is perfect now. It really couldn’t get any better - well only when Madam Rose becomes my wife. I don’t want my diary to become just a sex manual so I promise that tomorrow I will report some news.

  27th July

  Dear Diary, The Korean war officially ended today. The United States, China and North Korea have signed an armistice. The North remains communist and the South remains capitalist. That is the only news worth noting. Madam Rose took me to the Oriental Hotel this afternoon. We sat in the Bamboo room and listened to music from America. I also ate a very American steak and chips. I drank a Tiger beer. It was the first beer that I have ever had. It tasted surprisingly refreshing, although slightly bitter on the palate. I drank a whole bottle and was tipsy but not drunk. My mood was happy and gay, but that was because of Madam Rose and not the Tiger beer. Last night I sneaked into Madam Rose’s bed and we slept together. I heard Uncle Ernest get up twice to go to the bathroom that separates his bedroom from Madam Rose’s bedroom. I thought that I would be scared, but I wasn’t. He will know soon enough anyway when Madam Rose leaves him for me. She is his wife now, but she will be my wife one day.

  5th August

  Dear Diary, The prisoners of war were repatriated today after the Korean War. It was called Operation Big Switch. I was taking a bath with Madam Rose today and Madam Rose rang the bell for the maid. She came into the bathroom and looked at us naked together in the bath with no expression on her face. I don’t know if she condemns or condones us, if we excite or disgust her. Madam Rose ordered two iced teas and the maid brought them up to the bathroom for us. When she left we both laughed out so loudly I am sure that the maid must have heard us. We have caught the maid spying on us many times now and she has seen us see her watching us. She has become a part of our love making.

  7th August

  Dear Diary, This morning after breakfast Madam Rose rang for the maid and spoke to her in Siamese. The maid nodded and then turned to me and put the palms of her hands together in front of her chest and bowed to me. Then she got on her knees and undid my trousers. She took my penis in her mouth as Madam Rose watched. I asked Madam Rose the name of the maid but she said it didn’t matter and told me to undress the maid and make love to her, so I did. It was exciting to have Madam Rose watching us. Madam Rose touched herself as she watched. I have now made love to two women and I’m not even seventeen and three quarters yet. I know of none of my friends who have made love to a women yet and I have made love to two.

  8th August

  Dear Diary, The Soviet prime minister Georgi Malenkov announced that the Soviet Union has a hydrogen bomb. I only have another three weeks before I have to go back to England. I told Madam Rose that I love her. She didn’t actually say that she was in love with me, but she smiled and kissed me and that was enough to tell me that she loves me. I made love to her eight times today and made love to the maid twice because Madam Rose wanted to watch. When I marry Madam Rose I think we will continue to employ the maid. She is a nice lady and I would guess that she is twenty five years old or maybe slightly younger. Madam Rose told me today that her name is Nit.

  12th August

  Dear Diary, There was a terrible earthquake today - 7.2 in magnitude. It totally devastated most of the Greek Islands in the Ionian Sea. It is Greece’s worst natural disaster in centuries. Madam Rose, Nit and myself stayed naked for most of the day today and I lost count of the amount of times we made love. I don’t want my perfect life to end. I have told Madam Rose that I will come back at Christmas during the school holiday.

  13th August

  Dear Diary, Four million workers in France went on strike today in protest against austerity measure. Madam Rose and myself went on a boat trip along the Chao Phraya River. It was a lovely day. There isn’t a lot to see along the riverside, besides the Oriental hotel it is mostly just wooden shacks built on stilts and a lot of Siamese people fishing and washing in the river. When we got home we made love and I made love to Nit afterwards. I sleep with Madam Rose every night now. I wish I could take her back to England with me, but I fear what mother and father would say. When I finish school I will come and live in Siam.

  19th August

  Dear Diary, Some splendid news today, Len Hutton led the England cricket team to victory over Australia to win the Ashes for the first time in my lifetime. Actually it has been 19 years since England last won the Ashes, but now we have a fantastic team and a fantastic captain. I do not believe that Australia will ever dominate the game of cricket again.

  Myxomatosis has reached the United Kingdom after being illegally introduced onto an estate in West Sussex to control the wild rabbit population. I have been taking many photographs of Bangkok and even more of Madam Rose on the Kodak Box Brownie 127 that mother gave to me for my oriental trip. The photographs of Madam Rose have become more and more risqué. I will get them developed in the Kodak shop, but I cannot take their discretion for granted, so I will use one in another town when I get back to England.

  1st September

  Dear Diary, Today is the saddest day of my life. I am writing this on the aeroplane on my way home to England. Uncle Ernest took me to the airport and we shook hands and said goodbye. I had already said goodbye to Madam Rose and to Nit. Nit cried but Madam Rose just smiled. I think she was too sad to cry. I told her again how much I love her and I told her to wait for me. I will ask father at the first opportunity if I can g
o back to Bangkok in December. Today my heart is heavy and I have to try very hard not to allow myself to cry.

  25th September

  Dear Diary, I’m sorry that I have not written for such a long time. My life is not the same now. I have started my studies at Eton. I stay through the week and travel home on Friday evening and return here on Sunday afternoon. Most of the other chaps stay until half term but I quite like the train journey home and I like to see mother and father. I cannot stop thinking about Madam Rose. I believe my heart has broken and it may never repair. I have asked father if I may return to Siam in December but he says that he will have to think about it. A hurricane in south-east Asia killed over 1,000 people today and it made me think even more of Madam Rose. The first German prisoners of war returned from the Soviet Union to West Germany today.

  26th September

  Dear Diary, Today was the end of post-war sugar rationing in the United Kingdom. I find it hard to think about anything other than Madam Rose. I keep her photograph under my pillow. The rest I have to keep hidden. I wonder if she thinks about me as much as I think of her. I wrote her a letter today. I hope she replies soon.

  6th October

  Dear Diary, The British government sent troops to the colony of British Guiana, blaming communists for causing the unrest.

  10th October

  Dear Diary, I arrived home for the weekend last night and today father called me into the study. He had just been on the telephone to Uncle Ernest. He had a serious look on his face and I knew something had happened even before he started to speak to me. I sensed that I may be in serious trouble and I hoped father couldn’t see my hands shaking. I tried to remain calm and fight the overwhelming urge to confess everything. Father told me that Uncle Ernest is devastated because Madam Rose is pregnant and he has not been capable of fathering a child for over two decades. Uncle Ernest wanted to know if she had had any gentlemen callers during my time there. I said no, of course and father said that is what he had suspected. He said that she wouldn’t bring her fancy man into the house. Father also called her a whore and I had to stop myself from defending her honour. I couldn’t stop myself from asking what was going to happen and father told me that it already had. He informed me that Uncle Ernest had already kicked her out onto the street where, father said, she deserves to be. If I were older and if I had money I would be on the next flight to Siam to find her. She needs me now and I cannot go unless father will pay. I asked him again if I could go and see Uncle Ernest in December. Father waved me away with his hand and told me once again that he will think about it. I can’t stop thinking about Madam Rose and I am more than a little worried about her. About her and about my unborn baby.

  27th October

  Dear Diary, The Arbroath life-boat, Robert Lindsay capsized killing six crewmembers. I have heard nothing from Madam Rose. I worry that my letter to her might have arrived after Uncle Ernest kicked her out into the gutter. If Uncle Ernest opens the letter then he will know that I am the father of Madam Rose’s baby, but I do not care. I only care about Madam Rose and my baby. I have no way of contacting her. I have to get back to Siam and look for her. This is a disaster.

  5th November

  Dear Diary, David Ben-Gurion resigned as Prime Minister of Israel. I’m ashamed to admit this, but I have been stealing money from both mother and father, but I need a lot more. The only way I can get enough for the trip back to Siam is to steal and sell some of mother’s jewellery. I have asked father yet again if I can go back to Siam and he said no, maybe next year. I feel so desperately unhappy. I don’t know what to do. I’m thinking of confessing all to mother in the hope that she will have compassion in her heart for my broken heart. I need to think about all this. I wish I were older and wiser. This is all too difficult to handle without advice, but I have nobody who I can turn to.

  9th November

  Dear Diary, A civil war began in Laos between the Kingdom of Laos and the Pathet Lao. The kingdom of Laos has just gained independence from the French Army. In Cambodia the Khmer Issarak has started to fight the French army, but their Kingdom is already established.

  I wish I had some news to write of Madam Rose. Why, oh why, has she not tried to contact me? She must be so desperate on the streets on her own. I keep asking mother if they have had any further news from Uncle Ernest, but they have not.

  11th November

  Dear Diary, I watched a brand new current affairs programme on the BBC tonight. It is called Panorama and it is an excellent programme. There should be more programmes like this. It investigates behind the scenes. I expect that some of our corrupt politicians may be rather worried now.

  21st November

  Dear Diary, The Piltdown Man, which was discovered in 1912 and thought to be the fossilised remains of a hitherto unknown form of early human, was exposed as a hoax today.

  I wrote a letter to Nit today asking about Madam Rose. I hope that Nit will find someone who can read English. She is my last hope. If I don’t hear from Nit then I am going to sell mother’s jewellery. I have already taken some from her jewellery box and I have it hidden in my wardrobe.

  25th November

  Dear Diary, England lost to Hungary by six goals to three at Wembley stadium. England hadn’t lost in a home match to a country from outside the United Kingdom in 90 years. It is a shocking result, but I believe that England will recover and it is most likely that it will be another 90 years before we lose another game. If I am still alive I will be 107 years old and the year will be 2043.

  1st December

  Dear Diary, I don’t know how to write this, but Madam Rose is dead. Uncle Ernest has telephoned my father to tell him. She jumped into the Chao Phraya River and drowned herself. My beautiful darling is dead. I don’t know how I can go on living knowing that she is in heaven waiting for me with our baby.

  2nd December

  Dear Diary, The United Kingdom and Iran have reformed diplomatic relations, but nothing really matters anymore. I’m alive, but inside I am already dead.

  10th December

  Dear Diary, Winston Churchill won the Nobel Prize for literature for his mastery of historical and biographical description, as well as for brilliant oratory in defending exalted human values.

  31st December

  Dear Diary, Christmas has come and gone. I cannot stop the pain in my heart. I cannot face a new year without my love. I know that she waits for me in heaven and I must go to her. 1953 was indeed a splendid year. I became a man. I found and lost the love of my life and now I must go. Please forgive me mother and father. If you read this diary I know that you will understand. I am so sorry it has to end like this. Goodbye.

  Authors note;

  Ernest William Thompson was found hanging by his neck from a noose made with his school ties on Friday 1st January 1954. It was his 18th birthday. He was found by his mother. At the subsequent Coroner’s Inquest the verdict was suicide. RIP.

  5. The Winner Takes It All!

  A story of Murder

  Pong enjoyed going into the beer bars around Pattaya at least once a week, usually on a Thursday or Friday. She enjoyed picking up young attractive foreign men in the bars and she enjoyed having sex with them. She was a very sexual woman and this type of sex was uncomplicated. Pong was 32 years old and slim as most Thai women are. She was attractive certainly. Her hair was long, but always tied up during the day. She liked wearing French perfumes and designer clothes, never copies. She could speak fluent English and Chinese besides her native Thai. She had an older brother who still lived at home with her mother, but she hadn’t seen either of them for years. They lived in Roi et and she never seemed to have the time to go and visit. She telephoned her mum every month and sent money home every week. She was a good daughter - just busy! She had a lot of gold, but hardly ever wore it, except for a thin gold chain around her neck. Her watch w
as simple and on a black leather strap. She was never without her watch or her mobile phone, which was also simple, an old fashioned Nokia. It was small and slim and could be easily carried. She didn’t like the bigger smart phones that everyone seemed to have these days. Her image was important to her and she always looked good. Everything about her said ‘class’.

  It was a wet Thursday night and she took a taxi into the city. Her blue dress was short, but not too short, and her heels were high, but not too high. The taxi dropped her at the top of Soi Seven and she dashed along the soi holding her bag on top of her head as some protection from the rain. She was heading to the Aussie Bar, which wasn’t too far along the soi. She liked the Aussie Bar because there were a lot of girls working in the bar and that meant that a lot of men went to it. A lot of the men were younger and more attractive than most of the farangs who spent their time in Pattaya. The Aussie Bar was an open air bar, but it had a big roof over it. She brushed off some of the rain before she sat on a red faux leather bar stool at the oval shaped bar. Most of the bar girls in Thailand hate freelancers coming into their bars because it takes their business away, but Ping was tolerated because everyone knew who she was.

  She ordered a gin and tonic - she never drank anything else. She looked around the bar. Mostly old men and out of shape, but there were a few younger men and one of them was attractive, very attractive. He had watched Ping run into the bar out of the rain. He watched her sit on the stool and cross her shapely legs. He smiled at her as soon as their eyes met and she smiled back. He ditched the two bar girls who were sitting each side of him and taking it in turns to massage his groin in the hope that they would arouse his interest and not just his penis. He picked up his bottle of Chang beer and his bill cup and walked along the bar to Ping. She knew she had him already. His smile was wide and easy. He had good teeth and blond hair. Maybe it was a little longer than it should have been, but he looked good anyway.