Choices

by Sara Marion

  He heard the door open and Paxton stood behind him. She walked closer with a smile on her face. She threaded her arms between his and gripped his shoulders. Her bare chest was against his back and she kissed the back of his shoulder. Her eyes had a devilish grin in them and he felt her smile on his shoulder.

  Duke turned around and hugged her, “Hey now! You said that we’d never make it out of here if we started that.”

  “Hmm…should we test that theory?”

  “Not today cupcake.” His smile faltered as he stepped away from her, leaving her in the steam filled bathroom.

  Paxton didn’t protest as he shut the door behind him. He quickly dressed and fussed with his hair knowing that he didn’t have to do much to it. He was pulling on his boots when Paxton came out in a similar outfit. She had on jeans and a black shirt. Not a button down shirt but it has a shimmery effect with gold accents. Duke couldn’t help but stare, she looked beautiful.

  “What?”

  Duke shook his head, “You look good today.”

  Paxton smiled and blushed a little, “You aren’t so bad yourself.”

  She chuckled and Duke smiled. It was one of his favorite sounds. He wanted to hear it every morning when he woke up and right before he fell asleep at night. He knew that it would be a long uphill battle with her. She was fine being with him for now but he was scared to see what would happen when she went to New York, when she learned of Jacob’s passing. He wondered if that would change things. He could see her struggle from time to time but she sometimes gave into him. Those moments when she lets go of Jack, have been the best moments of Duke’s life.

  Duke watched Paxton walk out of the room. He stood and followed her out. All he had was one more day before she was over a thousand miles away from him, closer to Jack, and closer to the secret he was keeping from her. He knew there was a chance it would be in the papers up there.

  Duke pulled into the small parking lot. They decided they didn’t want to go on the other side of town for breakfast. They hadn’t been to Early Edition in months.

  “This sounds so good right now. I’m starving!”

  Duke laughed at Paxton. She could be so over dramatic sometimes. You would think he kept her locked up.

  “I already know what I want. Hopefully they aren’t too busy.”

  “From the looks of it, it doesn’t seem like it,” Paxton replied.

  Duke looked around the parking lot. It wasn’t empty but usually there were a lot more cars around. It was confirmed when they walked into the place, that it was dead. There were a few open tables and he was happy for that. He could tear up some food right about then. He always ordered the same thing every time.

  “Hello! Welcome to Early Edition!” the young hostess greeted as they walked in. “Just the two of you?”

  “Yeah,” Duke slid his arm around Paxton which she gracefully accepted. He even felt her lean into him some.

  The hostess smiled, “Right this way.”

  She led them to a booth on the other side of the room. It was near other patrons but a little more secluded.

  “Your waitress should be with you shortly,” the hostess smiled and left.

  “I have no idea what to get, I’m so hungry I could eat it all!”

  Duke glanced at her as she looked over the menu. He was scared of losing her. Duke wondered if she would be upset about him not saying anything to her. Maybe Jack wouldn’t tell her that he knew about it. If she found out, maybe he would believe it was from a newspaper article, a news channel, anything but him. Duke realized this was the first secret he kept from Paxton. His heart dropped as he loved how open and honest she was. She would never keep something like this from him.

  “Well, I know what I’m getting,” Duke said trying to distract himself from his own thoughts.

  Paxton smiled up at him, “You would. Do you ever deviate from anything at restaurants?”

  “Sometimes,” he flashed a smile at her.

  “Hello! My name is Abby and I will be takin’ care of y’all today. What can I start you off with to drink?”

  “Water for me please,” Paxton answered.

  “I’ll take coffee and water.”

  “Sugar or cream?”

  “Just black.” Duke smiled up at her. He noticed how she smiled a little longer at him before she turned to get their drinks.

  “Way to hide your crush honey,” Paxton said when she was out of ear shot.

  Duke looked at her. He smiled, “Jealous?”

  “You woke up in my bed, remember? She won’t ever get that lucky, plus isn’t she a little young for you?” Paxton raised her eyebrows.

  “Yeah,” Duke chuckled. “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.”

  He watched Paxton a few minutes longer before he turned his attention to the menu. He already knew what he wanted but he needed to get away from her gaze. He wouldn’t be able to hold on to his secret if he looked at her for too long.

  ***

  Paxton sat back and rubbed her stomach, “Ugh, I am so full!”

  She looked at her now empty plate. Two plate-sized pancakes, 2 strips of bacon, and an egg no longer sat in front of her. She couldn’t decide on any one thing so she ordered a few things. Now she regretted it. She didn’t understand how she just fit a meal for two in her.

  “You hardly had anything!”

  She looked over at Duke knowing he had to feel the same way. He got the usual Cat Backer Skillet. It consisted of potatoes, onions, cheese, two eggs, and toast with ham, bacon and sausage. He then ordered biscuits and gravy. She knew he didn’t work out too hard but his body still stayed in amazing shape. She knew that her meal she would have to spend at least two hours in the gym to work off. It just reminded her that she missed three yoga classes in the last week. She really needed to get back into the gym routine.

  “I had more than I should have. I should go to the gym today.”

  “You have to pack first.”

  “Yeah, I know.” She knew it was going to be a daunting task. She didn’t know what she wanted to wear to the formal charity event.

  Duke waived at the waitress signaling they were ready for the check. Paxton sat there thinking about everything she would need. She made a mental list hoping when they got back she’d actually remember all of it.

  “Ready?” Duke asked breaking her concentration.

  “Let’s go!” She said as she started scooting out of the booth.

  As Duke paid the cashier in the front by the door, Paxton wondered if he would go quiet again. He seemed kind of off today since he woke up. She knew he was on the phone. He was talking to someone as she heard a murmur of his voice when she was walking to the room. He had just hung up when she found him sitting on the bed.

  Paxton smiled as Duke grabbed her hand as they walked out. She enjoyed Duke’s company. She was starting to see a future with him, she wanted a future with him. Every once in a while though Jack crossed her mind. She just couldn’t shake him or the feelings she had. She knew it was going to take every ounce of her strength not to go see him in New York. He would be within reach but she figured if she could make it through this trip without seeing Jack, she had a chance to move on. Paxton saw the amazing man Duke was and maybe he was right all those months ago, maybe Ella would want them both to be happy. He always seemed to know when she needed him, what she wanted, and how to make her smile.

  “I wish you were coming to New York with me.”

  “Me too,” he started the car not looking at her.

  “Why don’t you? Maybe Susie can watch Link?”

  “I don’t want to put her out last minute, Pax. It’s fine it’s only a couple of days.”

  “I know,” Paxton didn’t try to hide the disappointment.

  “Are you going to miss me that much?”

  Paxton wanted to say yes, but part of her knew that she wanted him to go to keep her from doing something stupid. “Maybe.”

  “Is that sarcasm I hear?” He gave her a feigned look of b
eing hurt.

  “Maybe,” she chuckled.

  Duke laughed with her. Paxton enjoyed these little moments between them. He grabbed her hand and held it. They were almost back at the house already but she didn’t protest his touch.

  “So are you packing when we get back?”

  “Yeah, I have an early flight. We have to leave around four in the morning.”

  Paxton knew she would spend a day traveling as they would be in New York by four Eastern Time. That would leave plenty of time to check into the hotel rooms and settle, maybe even go out for dinner later if they weren’t too tired.

  Her thoughts were interrupted by the small movement of his thumb on the back of her hand. She felt every cell in her hand tingle with a small electric sensation as his thumb moved across her skin. She looked down at their hands then up at Duke. She didn’t know what this new sensation was. She suddenly didn’t want to go to New York with Ryan. She wanted to stay put with Duke. This new sensation ignited something in her. It made her forget what she was thinking about, more importantly it made her forget about Jack. Was it a sign that she was supposed to be with Duke?

  “What’s going through that head of yours?” Duke asked as he broke contact to turn into the driveway.

  Paxton stared a moment longer before answering feeling the cold abandonment of his hand. “Just things, New York.”

  “Jack?” Duke asked as he put the car in park.

  Paxton stared at him not knowing what to say. She knew that she was really thinking about Duke when he asked, but now the focus went back to Jack. Duke got out of the car and came around to open her door. She still hadn’t moved since he said Jack’s name. Duke opened it up and offered her a hand. Paxton took it and stepped out of the car.

  “Thanks.” She slung her purse over her shoulder.

  “I wasn’t thinking about him,” she answered as she unlocked the door.

  “But now you are?”

  “Yes, you brought him up.”

  She saw Duke open the crate where Link was. He picked him up and headed back outside into the yard. Paxton suddenly felt the mood shift in the cabin and Duke was avoiding something. Her thoughts were invaded by Jack, the good memories, however seeing Duke make himself at home, taking care of Link. She saw how good things could be right now. She wondered if she would feel this way tomorrow when she is thousands of miles away from Duke and only an hour away from Jack. She wished with all her heart Duke was going with her. She knew as long as he was there, she could stay away from Jack. Maybe she can still talk Duke into going. She quickly texted Susie about watching Link for a few days, she then headed up the stairs to pack as Duke tended to Link.

  TWELVE

  Paxton closed the door of her hotel room. She was glad her day of traveling was over. She threw her jacket on the chair that was right inside the door and looked around at the posh suite that she booked. Ryan had the room right next to hers. He was just as tired as she was. They both wanted to sleep some before dinner. It was about five and they decided to meet back up around seven-thirty.

  Paxton set her suitcase in the closet. Throwing herself on the bed she felt the exhaustion set in. Looking over at the clock she wished they decided to go for food first so she could just sleep the night away. Last night she didn’t get much sleep as Duke stayed the night. She didn’t want him stay but she couldn’t help but think that something had changed between them. He had been acting weird all day yesterday and he seemed afraid to let her come to New York. She wished Susie would have been available to watch Link but she couldn’t. After calling for a wakeup call, she laid down and shut her eyes.

  She awoke to the phone ringing. It was her wakeup call but she didn’t even remember falling asleep. She grabbed it and when no one answered she knew that the hour had really passed. She set the phone down and sat up. Paxton felt even more exhausted than when she laid down. Every muscle ached, not from being overworked, just from lack of sleep and traveling.

  Paxton stretched her legs out straight in front of her. She folded herself over to stretch them out. The slight pull of stretch felt good. She stayed like that for about a minute before lying back down to do some spinal twists. She knew she definitely needed to get back into a yoga class as she felt how tight all her muscles were. She noticed she started lacking in some flexibility due to her not practicing like she used to.

  Deciding that she should do a few more stretches, Paxton laid on her floor. She grabbed a towel and did a few leg stretches. A knock came on her door and she peeled herself off the ground and looked through the peep hole. It was Ryan. She immediately unlocked the door and opened it for him. She walked away as he entered and fell back on the floor. She grabbed the towel and finished her other leg stretch. She needed to stay even.

  “So what are you thinking about for dinner?”

  Paxton laid flat on floor working on the pull of the fascia on the outer part of her leg. “I don’t know. What if we just order in? I’m really tired from the trip.”

  “Me too. Let’s see what’s on the menu and I am waiting on something to arrive tomorrow so I will be occupied up until the event.” Ryan picked up a menu as she switched to stretching her hamstring.

  “What are you waiting on? Did you forget something back home?” Paxton sat up and grabbed a menu to start searching for her dinner. She was done stretching at the moment. When he didn’t answer, she looked up at him. “Ryan?”

  “Just something I thought should be up here for the event. I didn’t think about it before I left.”

  “What is it?”

  “A surprise.”

  Paxton saw excitement in Ryan’s eyes. She had no earthly idea of what he was talking about. They had everything they needed. “Okay…” Paxton wasn’t sure what was up his sleeve.

  “Also, since we are talking about the event. I have written my speech. It’s heartfelt but I think you should be the one to give it.”

  “No, the gallery was your baby! This is your moment.”

  “No, I want you to give it. I’m not good at public speaking.”

  “Ryan, you are unbelievably good at public speaking. You do it all the time at the gallery, in front of groups. You’re a natural.”

  “Please, Pax? I think what I’m having arrive tomorrow will help you out.”

  Staring at him, Paxton tried to figure out what he was doing. He was being secretive about things and she didn’t like it, especially now. She saw him plead with his eyes.

  “I think I’m just going to have a burger,” she changed the subject.

  “I was thinking of a steak. Shall I call down or do you want to?”

  “Since I have to speak tomorrow, you order,” Paxton smiled.

  Paxton stuck her last fry in her mouth. She was so full but she continued to eat anyways. Lethargy was definitely starting to set in and she knew she would regret it in the morning. She looked over at Ryan who seemed to be mirroring her thoughts as he took a bite of his potatoes.

  “I’m stuffed,” Paxton leaned back and rested her hand on her stomach. She was glad she was in comfortable clothes.

  “Best steak I have ever had,” Ryan added on.

  “Best food…all day.” Paxton found it hard to breath with everything she just shoved down her throat.

  “Agreed, hate to cut this short but I’m heading back to my room. I think I’m about to go into a food coma.” Ryan stood up and stretched.

  Paxton couldn’t move, she just sat there and nodded her head. She had about twenty feet to get to her bed and it seemed like a daunting task. She groaned as she got to her feet and heard Ryan laughing at her.

  “You gonna make it Pax?”

  She shot him a look and he tried to stifle his laugh but was unsuccessful. “I’ll be fine. Now go, I want to sleep now.”

  “Alright, see you in the morning.” He wrapped her in a hung and kissed her temple as he released her.

  “Good night.” Paxton went and fell into her bed. She didn’t wait to see if Ryan really left.

&n
bsp; “Make sure you lock up behind me!” he yelled.

  She groaned as she got back up to lock the door. She never felt safe enough to sleep in a hotel without every lock on the door secure but tonight after everything she just ate she was fine not locking it. Her mind began to reason with her on why she should secure it as she made her way to the door. She locked it then went lazily back to her bed and curled up. She was definitely regretting the mass-intake of food she just consumed. Ryan had thrown in an appetizer, not knowing how big the proportions were. She settled further into the bed and she felt the fatigue take over as she couldn’t concentrate any longer. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.