Undone by His Touch

by Annie West

  ‘It suits perfectly. Suddenly I’m ravenous.’ For a moment the shadow of a grin hovered on his lips and Chloe had a shocking glimpse of how irresistible he must be in good humour.

  If ever he was in good humour.

  ‘Clever too,’ he drawled. ‘Far easier for a blind man to handle.’

  That observation, the little sting in the tail, robbed his earlier praise of warmth and left her deflated.

  Was there anything wrong in trying to take his limitations into consideration? To realise it must be difficult chasing unseen food around a plate?

  He made her consideration seem like condescension.

  Her boss was frank to the point of rudeness, bad-tempered and graceless. He was nothing like his charmer of a brother.

  A shiver whispered down her spine and she stiffened.

  Chloe knew which brother she’d rather deal with. Declan Carstairs might be arrogant but …

  ‘I’ll have it ready in half an hour, then.’

  ‘Good.’ He turned away, took three uneven paces and put his hand down to the corner of the desk as if to reassure himself he was in the right place. It was a subtle move she wouldn’t have noticed except that her brain was busy cataloguing everything about him.

  Instantly she felt a pang of sympathy. How hard it must be for an active man to adjust to a world he couldn’t see.

  Perhaps his temper was understandable.

  ‘Before you go, Ms Daniels.’ She paused in the act of turning away. ‘Tell me, you did sign a confidentiality clause with your contract of employment, didn’t you?’

  ‘I did.’

  ‘Then you know the severe penalties for revealing private information about anything you see or hear in the course of your work.’

  Chloe drew a deep breath, telling herself he was within his rights to check, just as he’d been to insist she sign such a clause before working for him. It had nothing to do with her personal integrity.

  ‘I understand that.’ Nevertheless her fingers curled tight.

  ‘Good. Keep it in mind. Because I’d have no hesitation in suing an employee who betrayed my trust if, for instance details of this current deal, or personal information about my life, were to appear in the press.’

  Chloe’s hackles rose. Did he distrust all his employees on principle or just her?

  That fragile stirring of sympathy withered, replaced by a belligerent determination to keep out of Declan Carstairs’ way. She didn’t need to listen to his provocation. She had enough on her plate with worry about Ted’s health and meeting the cost of his rehabilitation.

  ‘I’ve worked for celebrities in the past, Mr Carstairs. People hounded by the paparazzi every time they stepped outside.’ Her tone, more frigid than cool, implied they were far more newsworthy than he, despite the fact he was one of the country’s richest men. ‘None of them ever had complaints about my discretion.’

  ‘Really?’ One dark eyebrow arched provocatively.

  ‘Really. Now, if you’ll excuse me, Mr Carstairs, I’ll get on with lunch.’

  Chloe immersed herself in the routine of keeping the house in tip-top condition. A magnificent sprawling place, it dated from the nineteenth century. Her favourite feature was the wide veranda with its vista of manicured gardens. The gardens led to the cliff edge that dropped sheer to the blue-green valley, which spread into the distance.

  Built at a time when a rich man included a ballroom in his country retreat, the place was a pleasure to work in. Especially as a wing had been added with a modern kitchen and housekeeper’s suite.

  She loved the gracious old home and didn’t mind that it took a lot to maintain. That gave her reason to avoid the corner study where Declan Carstairs spent his time.

  Occasionally as she crossed the lobby she heard his rich baritone on the phone or chatting to his PA, David Sarkesian, who’d returned from Sydney. The sound of her employer’s deep voice made her quicken her pace lest he accuse her of eavesdropping for saleable gossip.

  That insinuation still burned.

  As did the suspicion that she enjoyed listening to the smooth rhythms of his voice for too much. The tingling awareness she felt in Declan Carstairs’ presence disturbed her. It reminded her that, contrary to everything she’d learned in the last six years, her libido hadn’t died with Mark.

  She wished it had. She didn’t need that hot, edgy sensation low in her stomach when Declan touched her hand reaching for a plate. Or the breathless anticipation that caught her lungs when he spoke to her.

  She even enjoyed the verbal wrangling that seemed to be part of daily life working for him. He never let an encounter go by without challenging, probing or teasing till she almost suspected he looked forward to provoking her responses.

  At least it prevented her dwelling on memories of the last time she’d lived here, when her dream job had turned into a nightmare.

  ‘It’s over now. You need to put it behind you,’ she told her reflection in the bathroom mirror.

  Easier said than done when fragmented nightmares still shattered her dreams. That was why she’d forced herself to come in here, to what had been Adrian Carstairs’ suite.

  Better to face the past squarely.

  She’d learned that when she lost Mark years ago. The shock of grief, the unfairness of it, had kept her in denial for ages, trying to cling to a life that was past. It was only when she accepted the devastating blow that had stolen their dreams that she was able to move on.

  Chloe swiped a cloth over the vanity unit.

  ‘The past is gone.’

  When she lost Mark those words had been a lament. Now there was relief that the trauma of Adrian Carstairs’ frightening obsession was over. No matter how much she regretted his death, she couldn’t help feeling a sense of freedom that he’d never stalk her again. That his dangerous fixation was over.

  She picked up her cleaning supplies and turned, only to walk into a wall of naked male muscle.

  She was soft, lithe and warm as his arms instinctively closed around her. The unexpectedness of contact momentarily stunned Declan, but a second later his body was responding to the intimate contact.

  Predictable, he supposed, since he hadn’t had a lover since well before the accident.

  Yet why did his grip tighten when she moved to pull away? Surely not because he enjoyed the feel of her slender hand splayed across his bare chest? The gentle, almost phantom caress of her breath near his collarbone?

  ‘Ms Daniels, I presume?’ He forced himself into speech, covering his abrupt loss of control.

  ‘Mr Carstairs, I didn’t expect to see you here.’

  There was a slightly breathless quality to her usually crisp voice as if he’d caught her out in some way.

  He liked it.

  Just as he liked the firm yet enticingly soft curves pressed against him.

  This was Chloe Daniels, his sharp-tongued, no-nonsense housekeeper? She sounded young, but he’d supposed her voice was misleading. She was nothing like those sturdy, slightly frumpish women who’d staffed the various Carstairs properties in his childhood.

  This woman was slim but curved in all the right places. ‘Luscious’ was the word that sprang to mind. His fingers tightened.

  A familiar surge of frustration hit him: impatience that he couldn’t see her for himself. Anger at this disability. Damn his blindness! Would he ever be whole again? He’d been curious about her so long and now, holding her, he had more questions than ever.

  ‘I didn’t expect to find you here either. I thought I heard voices.’

  No need to say the muffled sound of conversation from Adrian’s room had hit him like a sledgehammer blow to the heart. He’d dropped the shirt he’d taken off as he reached the head of the stairs and hurried here, nerves strung tight.

  He wasn’t a fanciful man but to his guilt-ridden conscience, the sound of talking from Adrian’s suite had seemed portentous.

  ‘I was talking to myself.’ She sounded defiant rather than defensive, as if challengin
g him to make an issue of it. He was intrigued at this facet of his ever-practical employee.

  ‘Indeed?’

  ‘I’m sorry I disturbed you. I was just doing a quick clean.’

  ‘No one will be using the suite.’ He’d lost his taste for company the day he’d lost his brother.

  ‘I understand.’ She paused then added, her voice low, ‘I’m sorry about your brother, Mr Carstairs.’

  ‘Thank you,’ he said tersely, dropping his hands.

  Familiar guilt swamped him—that he was here, alive, experiencing a surge of sexual interest for this woman, when Adrian was dead. He’d failed his younger brother.

  He should have been able to stop him.

  His stomach lurched sickeningly. They’d been close, despite their recent geographical separation. He’d been Adrian’s biggest supporter, the one Adrian had turned to when their parents had been busy with their business and charity interests.

  But that counted for nothing. All that mattered was that last, irrevocable failure.

  How had he let himself be persuaded by Adrian’s upbeat assurances? He should have come here sooner, not relied on phone and email during that vital phase of his new project. How could he not have known Adrian was in such despair?

  ‘Is there anything else, Mr Carstairs?’

  Declan plunged a hand through his shaggy hair. He wished there was something else—something to distract him.

  Work was no solace. It couldn’t ease the weight of remorse.

  Nor could the search for the woman who’d used his little brother then tossed him aside when she found he’d lost his wealth. Her betrayal had driven Adrian to suicide. Any doubts Declan had about her guilt had been obliterated by the scrawled note David had found jammed in Declan’s desk. As soon as he’d recognised Adrian’s handwriting he’d told Declan, who’d insisted he read it aloud.

  Neither had spoken of it since but the words were engraved in Declan’s memory: desperate words that confirmed Adrian’s unnamed girlfriend, the woman he’d been seeing those last weeks, had pushed him to the edge.

  Yet the private investigator had turned up no clue to her identity. Where had she vanished to?

  Declan’s mouth tightened. Adrian had always been the more sensitive one and, he realised now, more vulnerable. Declan felt impotent, unable to find the woman who’d destroyed his brother and make her face what she’d done.

  He gulped down bitter regret, concentrating instead on the burning hate that sustained him when the burden of guilt grew unbearable.

  Self-hatred for not saving his brother.

  Hatred too for the woman with red-gold hair and come-hither green eyes in the photo his brother had shown him so proudly. A photo so candid it was obvious he’d taken the shot in bed. The woman had lain sprawled in abandon, as if sated from love-making. Golden light had bathed her, giving her the aura of a languid sex goddess inviting adoration.

  And Declan had felt a shot of pure, unadulterated lust blast through him at the sight of her.

  Remembering made him sick to the stomach, as if he’d betrayed his brother with his response to the woman Adrian had loved. The woman who’d driven Adrian to fatal despair.

  Between them they were responsible for Adrian’s death.

  CHAPTER THREE

  HE NO longer touched her, yet Chloe burned as if still pressed against him.

  Shivers trembled down her spine. She had to lock her knees to stand firm. But nothing, not all her willpower, could prevent her dragging in the scent of citrus and man, spice and warm musk, that tickled her nostrils. Her gaze strayed to his half-naked form.

  She’d never seen anyone like Declan Carstairs—his powerful, beautiful body and his larger-than-life aura. Unshaven, hard-jawed and scarred he looked more then ever like a pirate. The sort who thrived on danger and the pleasures of the flesh.

  Chloe tried to recall Mark’s generous smile, the twinkle of encouragement in his hazel eyes and, to her horror, conjured only the weakest of images. Could she have forgotten in just six years? Or was Declan Carstairs clouding her thoughts? The idea appalled her.

  Eyes wide, she retreated a step and put down her bucket of supplies, crossing her arms defensively.

  ‘Mr Carstairs? If there’s nothing else I really should be getting on.’

  A flicker of movement stirred his features as if he’d only just recalled her presence. Why did he look so grim?

  ‘Actually there is something, Ms Daniels.’

  He flexed his hands, drawing her gaze to the sinewy strength in his forearms.

  What would it be like to be held by him? Not supported impersonally after bumping into each other, but embraced?

  It felt like betrayal of her past even to wonder. Yet she couldn’t prevent the niggle of curiosity.

  ‘You were working here when my brother came to stay, weren’t you? While I was in China?’

  Instantly alert, Chloe darted a look at his face.

  ‘Yes. I’d been here some time when he arrived.’ Anxiety jiggled inside. Just the mention of Adrian Carstairs gave her the jitters.

  How could one brother fascinate and reawaken long-dormant female awareness when the other had left her cold?

  ‘Tell me, did he bring anyone to stay with him?’

  She shook her head, remembering too late that Declan needed to hear her response. ‘No, he came alone.’

  ‘But there must have been visitors.’ Dark eyes fixed at a point near her mouth, as if focused on her words. She sensed an intensity in her employer she hadn’t encountered before, even when he’d quizzed her about confidentiality.

  ‘There were no overnight guests.’

  ‘But for a meal perhaps?’

  ‘No, not that I recall. Your brother ate alone.’

  Except for the days he’d turned up in the big kitchen and insisted on sharing a meal with her.

  At first Chloe had welcomed him. Then, when he had grown more intense—his gaze fixing on her hungrily, his moods unstable—she’d taken to eating early in her room or finding an excuse to be away at meal time.

  But she couldn’t say that to his brother. There was nothing to be gained by sharing the fact Adrian Carstairs had made her life hell those last weeks. Declan had enough to deal with without her dumping that on him.

  ‘I see.’ Yet still he frowned, his brows bunched. ‘But it’s possible he had a visitor you didn’t know about?’

  ‘It’s possible,’ she said slowly. ‘Though not likely.’

  Increasingly Adrian had spent his time within sight of her until she’d had to resort to subterfuge to escape him. She’d have been grateful then for visitors to distract him from his fixation on her.

  ‘He didn’t mention anyone?’ The urgency of her boss’s tone surprised her.

  ‘I … Not that I recall.’

  ‘I see.’ Declan’s head sank slowly, as if weighted. The vibrant energy that was so much part of him dimmed and she sensed despair.

  Impulsively she lifted her hand to him, then let it drop. She could imagine his sharp rejection of unwanted sympathy.

  ‘I’m sorry I can’t help.’

  His lips curved in a twist that might have passed for a smile if it weren’t for the grim lines creasing his cheek and pulling his scar tight.

  ‘No matter.’ He lifted a hand to thrust back a lock of dark hair from his brow. ‘But if you recall seeing a woman with gold hair—a friend of Adrian’s—you’ll let me know? I’m trying to contact her. It’s … important.’

  ‘Of course.’

  Chloe frowned. Adrian had never mentioned a girlfriend. He’d seemed a loner.

  ‘Good.’ For a moment longer Declan stood, as if wanting to prolong conversation. Then he turned and paced stiffly away, arm out in front of him till he reached the hall door and disappeared towards his room.

  ‘I have a favour to ask.’

  Chloe spun round to find her employer leaning against the doorjamb as if he’d been there for ages, watching her.

  Her pulse acc
elerated. Though he clearly hadn’t been watching, she was unsettled by the notion he’d been there, listening to her potter in the kitchen, humming under her breath.

  Yet even as the thought surfaced, she realised it wasn’t anxiety she felt. Not like when his brother had stalked her, silently watching with an intensity that had given her the creeps.

  No, this was different—a spiralling drop of excitement that drew her skin tight and clenched her stomach muscles in awareness. It had everything to do with her inability to blot Declan Carstairs from her brain.

  His charismatic presence had banished the last shadows of anxiety she’d felt about returning to Carinya.

  At least now her dreams weren’t all nightmares, she admitted with a grimace. The last few nights she’d woken hot and shaken by vivid fantasies featuring Declan in glorious, nude detail. An insidious little tremor shot through her at the memory.

  ‘Yes, Mr Carstairs?’ She injected her tone with a brisk efficiency she was far from feeling.

  He straightened and stepped into the room, turning to the sound of her voice.

  ‘I have a meeting in Sydney and I want to be rid of this beard.’ He lifted one hand ruminatively to his chin and Chloe heard the scratch of bristles.

  For one insane moment she was tempted to lift her hand so they rasped against her palm. She could almost feel the rough pleasure of that tickle on her skin.

  The realisation hit her like a hammer blow, robbing her of speech.

  How had she grown so desperate for this man? Just imagining the scrape of his unshaven skin made her insides liquefy. How could that be? They weren’t friends or anything like lovers. She barely knew him! With Mark, desire had grown with liking, with love. By comparison this was a smash-and-grab raid on her senses.

  ‘David’s gone on ahead so I wondered if you’d oblige. I can just about get by with an electric razor but it’s pretty haphazard.’

  ‘Of course, Mr Carstairs. I’m happy to help. But I should warn you, I’ve never shaved anyone.’

  ‘Then I’ll be your first.’ His mouth widened in a slow smile that snagged her heart mid-beat. ‘A first for us both.’

  Not once in these last weeks had he smiled at her properly. Chloe wished fervently he hadn’t decided to begin. She sagged against the worktop, her hand to the pulse trembling in her throat. Just as well he couldn’t see her.