Hard to Fight

by Bella Jewel

  When I reach the door, I look up at the large man standing beside it. I flash him my best smile and he narrows his eyes. My guess? I’m not the usual kind of girl who comes to these kinds of places. I can already tell the bar isn’t the nicest. It’s old, run-down, and there are shitty cars parked all around it. Not that that means anything sinister, but usually people who own cars like those don’t have a great deal of money. So it’s a cheap bar, and with cheap comes drama.

  “You got ID?”

  I raise my brows. This guy is asking me for ID when I’ve seen at least three underage girls go through the doors. “Are you serious?” I say.

  He crosses his arms. “Yeah, I am.”

  With a sigh, I pull out my ID and hand it to him.

  He actually holds it up to the light to see if it’s been tampered with, squinting his eyes and running his fingers over the surface. Seriously? I mean, I guess I should be flattered but honestly, this guy is just being a jerk. He finally nods and hands it back to me. “Go in.”

  “Gee, thanks,” I mutter.

  I step past him into the club and stare around the crummy space. I know what Dean looks like, I was presented with recent photos before I came in here. I push past the groups of people and receive a few catcalls. When I sit down at the bar, I order a vodka and orange so I don’t look suspicious. Then I settle in, sipping it while I stare around the bar, looking for Dean.

  “What’s a pretty girl like you doin’ in here?”

  I turn and see a skinny, strung-out, scary-looking dude grinning down at me. He’s got two teeth missing and his blond hair is flopping over his head, covering most of his eyes, which I can clearly tell are bloodshot. A junkie. Wonderful.

  “Just waiting for a friend,” I say, turning back to my drink.

  “Say, girly, do you have a buck I could borrow?”

  A buck? Honestly? “Nope.”

  “Not even one.”

  “Nope.”

  He stands there for a minute, silently, and then I feel his fingers touching my purse clutched by my side. Seriously? I spin and take hold of his hand, twisting it hard.

  He cries out and starts jumping from side to side.

  “Get your hands off my purse.”

  I let him go and he stumbles backwards. “You’re crazy!” he cries, rushing off.

  Yes, yes I am.

  I turn and see Dean standing at the bar, smiling over at me. I have to compose myself quickly, because I’m shocked to see him standing there. I gather myself and give him a lighthearted shrug as I take him in. Dean isn’t a bad-looking man. He’s tall, quite well built, and has the darkest brown eyes I’ve ever seen. His dark brown hair is cut into a buzz cut, and if he were healthy, I’d look twice. But he’s not healthy. His cheeks are hollow, the skin under his eyes is dark, and he’s got clear track marks on his arms.

  Junkie.

  “You do that to many men?” he continues.

  “If I have to,” I say, turning to my drink.

  “What brings a girl like you to a place like this?”

  Here’s my chance. “My boyfriend dumped me on the side of the road after I found out he put his dick where it didn’t belong, and that place wasn’t me. I confronted him, he got angry and kicked me out. I walked and this was the closest place.”

  “What an asshole,” Dean says, sitting down.

  Bingo.

  “You’re telling me? I mean, what’s wrong with men? Am I that unattractive that he has to go ahead and do that?”

  Dean’s eyes scan over me. Then he grins. “You aren’t unattractive, in fact, I think you’re the prettiest girl I ever saw.”

  God.

  I want to punch him.

  “Thanks.” I smile sweetly. “What’s your name?”

  “Dean.”

  I reach out my hand. “Suzanne.” I am not about to give him my real name.

  “Nice to meet you, Suzanne,” he says, curling his fingers around mine and shaking. “Tell me more about this jackass while I buy you another drink.”

  “How sweet, and please, call me Susie.”

  This is going really well.

  * * *

  “What a pig!” Dean cries, shaking his head. “Men like that make me want to commit murder.”

  I’ve made up a long, horrible story about my boyfriend who dumped me, and Dean has bought every bit of it. Three drinks down and he’s comfortable enough for me to drop Raide’s name. I take a sip of my drink, nodding enthusiastically at the man I really want to hurt. He’s a pig, the fact that he’s sitting here saying how horrible my “boyfriend” is just makes me want to squeeze his throat. Considering he took the life of his girlfriend.

  Pig.

  “Right?” I cry, throwing my hands up. “What sort of man does that, anyway? I always knew he was bad for me. My sister, she said to me, ‘Susie, that Raide is bad news.’ I should have listened.”

  Dean’s face drops, and I want to throw my hands in the air and squeal with delight. He says, “Your boyfriend’s name was Raide?”

  “Raide Knox. What sort of name is that anyway?”

  Dean’s entire body goes stiff and he mutters, “Excuse me, I need to use the bathroom.”

  Then he hurries off. Okay, that wasn’t exactly how this was meant to go. I get up and follow him down the dark hall toward the bathroom. I round a corner, where a door swings open and a hand curls around my arm, hauling me into a dark space. The door clicks shut and locks. “Let me go!” I hiss.

  “Do you think I’m stupid?”

  Dean.

  Shit.

  “What are you talking about, I’m just using the bathroom.”

  “Who sent you here? Was it the cops?”

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about!” I cry, squirming.

  He slaps me so hard, I see stars. I kick out but because I can’t see him, I miss completely. Before I can reach around for my gun, I feel the barrel of one pressed to my forehead. I freeze and suck in a deep breath. He flicks on a small light and I see he’s got a knife swinging around in his other hand. This is not good.

  “Who the fuck are you?”

  “I—” I need to play this up, so I burst into tears. “I was just trying to get home. He was my b-b-b-b-boyfriend. He left me on the side of the road.”

  “You’re lying!” he bellows, shoving the gun harder against my forehead.

  “I’m not!” I scream.

  Where are York’s men and why haven’t they barged in here by now?

  “Scream again, and I’ll blow your brains out. Tell me who you really are.”

  “My name is Suzanne,” I sob. “I’m just trying to get home.”

  “I don’t believe you,” he hisses. “Now, tell me who you’re working for?”

  “I swear,” I whisper.

  “Shut up and tell me who the fuck sent you in here?”

  “No one, I swear.”

  He growls. “Fine, then you’re going to come with me.”

  He shifts me around and then opens another door; only it isn’t the one we came through. He shoves me out and we enter a secluded room that’s not in the bar. I don’t understand. I stare at the door, and then back at the room. Dean laughs and shoves the gun into my back, pushing me forward. “Confused?” he chuckles. “It’s a two-door hall. It’s there so no one knows this room is here. And guess what, sweetheart? Only I have the key.”

  Crap.

  “So as far as anyone knows, you went to the bathroom, but you ain’t comin’ back.”

  God. York’s men are probably looking for me, but they’re not going to find me. This room is obviously still connected to the bar, I can only hope they’re covering all the exits. Dean pushes me toward another door. I want to reach for my gun or fight him, but it’s too risky. He’s got two weapons, even if I manage to tackle him, I’m outgunned. I just have to pray York comes to the rescue.

  We step into a garage and I see a large SUV sitting right in the middle. Dean reaches into his pocket and I don’t think, I spin
and kick out at his shin. He stumbles backwards, cursing loudly. I lunge at him and my fist flies out to connect with his jaw. He bellows in pain and his other hand comes up and tangles in my hair. He tugs me down hard and I scream, trying to reach out for my gun.

  Then something plunges into my neck, and my feet go out from beneath me.

  With that, my world goes black.

  Chapter Twenty-six

  I come to with a pounding head.

  It takes me a few minutes to blink and get my bearings, that’s when I realize I’m in a poorly lit room that is definitely not York’s. Shit. This is bad; this is really, really bad. I quickly pat myself down and notice all the wires are gone and so is my gun and phone. Oh no, no no no. This is not good. I didn’t even get a damned confession and now I’m stuck here. He’s probably going to kill me and get away with everything.

  Just magic.

  “You’ve got to be shittin’ me.”

  I jerk at the sound of that voice. No. Fucking. Way. I whip my head around to see Raide leaning against the wall, staring at me with a hard expression. He’s battered and bloody, and he doesn’t look good at all. His dark shirt is ripped and hanging off his body in tatters. His jeans are bloodied and his hair is a mess. He looks like he hasn’t slept in days.

  “Raide?” I squeak.

  “Tell me you’re not here because you went after Dean?”

  I look down.

  “Jesus, Grace!” he barks.

  “Why are you here?” I snap, reaching up and rubbing my temples.

  “Found Dean again, only he anticipated that I was coming and got twenty fuckin’ men to beat the shit out of me and drag me in here.”

  My eyes soften and I say, “Are you hurt?”

  “Do I fuckin’ look hurt?” he mutters.

  I purse my lips and give him a truly menacing glare. “No need to be an ass about it.”

  He shakes his head. “Now you’re here, too. This is just proving to be my lucky fuckin’ week.”

  “I’m here because I was trying to help you,” I cry.

  “Real lot of good that did ya.”

  I narrow my eyes at him. “I see you’re still angry at me.”

  “Angry?” he asks. “For what? It couldn’t be for using me, lying to me, betraying me, and trying to get me put away.”

  I snort. “Someone’s obviously not over it.”

  “Over it?” He laughs bitterly. “I’ve been fucked before, Grace. But you, lady, you shoved that one right up there. Hell, it’s so far up there, I can’t get it back out.”

  I flinch and say low, “I didn’t mean to hurt you, and if you knew me at all, you’d know that.”

  “No? What did you mean to do?”

  “Take you back for trial,” I say honestly. “Because that’s my job. Then I fell for you and got suspended. Then, stupidly, I decided to try to help you. God only knows why because you’re still as arrogant as you were the last time I saw you. Thanks for that, by the way, I’m sure Benny enjoyed finding me naked and cuffed to a bed!”

  Raide’s jaw ticks and his eyes grow angrier. “What did you think I was going to do? Give you another chance?”

  “No, because people like you don’t give second chances. You just do whatever suits you.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” he growls.

  I shake my head. “It means you don’t listen, you don’t care, and you don’t do anything for anyone but yourself.”

  His eyes widen and his jaw clenches. “So the last few months I’ve been chasing my sister’s killer, that was all a big, selfish act?”

  “It wasn’t then. It is now.”

  “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

  “You didn’t have me then. You had nothing to fight for. Now you do, and if you go away, that means I’m going to lose the only man I’ve ever cared about. So yes, it’s selfish. It’s selfish of you never to think about those who are going to lose you. It’s selfish for you not to tell the police the truth. It’s selfish for you to put yourself in this position!”

  His entire body jerks. “I’m fucking selfish?” he roars. “What about you?”

  “I never said I wasn’t,” I whisper. “God dammit, I never said I wasn’t.” My voice rises. “I’m selfish because fuck, I care about you and I shouldn’t. I’m selfish because I begged for this job, I told them I could do it, I told them I was good enough and I failed. I failed because I put my needs before my job. I’m selfish, Raide. I never claimed I wasn’t, but at least I can admit it. You just live in your own little world. Did you even care about me? Or was I just some fun on your travels?”

  He stares at me. Really stares. Then he leans forward and hisses, “You’ll never, ever fuckin’ know.”

  God damn him. Arrogant jerk.

  I shake my head and shuffle back against the wall. I drop my head in my hands and fight back the tears. Fuck Raide. Fuck this situation. This’ll teach me to care about someone who is never going to return the favor. I’m so angry at him. How dare he make me feel like doing my job was the worst thing in the world! My pain quickly turns to rage and I push to my feet, storming over to him.

  “You know what?” I screech. “Fuck you, Raide Knox! I was doing my job. I didn’t do anything wrong except fall in love with you, you arrogant prick. I made a mistake but you’re making a mistake every damned day of your life. You’re running from reality. You’re going to put yourself away with blood on your hands because you can’t let go, because you don’t care enough about the people who are still here. So screw you! I don’t regret what I am. I don’t.”

  I lash out to shove him, but his hand shoots up and he catches my wrist. He pulls me down so quickly, I’m flat on my back before I realize he’s over me. I gasp and squirm, but there’s no point. He’s heavy and he’s determined.

  He leans down close—so close, our lips are only millimeters apart. “You don’t get to pretend you know me,” he rasps, and God, he smells good. “There’s only one thing I’ll be running from when this is finished, and that’ll be you.”

  My heart cracks open and I turn my face to the side. Tears leak out and run down my cheeks.

  “Fuck,” he mutters.

  “Get off me,” I whisper.

  “Grace—”

  “Now!” I scream so loudly, he flinches. He pushes off me and I scurry out from beneath him. I walk over to the corner and drop down, turning my back to him. My heart is throbbing and my entire world has been tipped upside down. Yes, it’s all my fault, but knowing that doesn’t take away the agony lying deep in my chest. I just want to go home. I want to forget this ever happened, but most of all, I want to forget Raide fucking Knox.

  * * *

  I wake with a start when the door swings open and three men enter. Not one of them is Dean. I look from one to the other and size them up. Two have guns, so that’s not good. One is apparently weaponless, but he’s big and he looks mean. He steps forward, and when the light flicks on, I see he’s got a bald head and seriously black eyes. I shiver and sit up, wrapping my arms around my knees.

  I flick Raide a glance, but he’s got his hardened eyes on the three men. “Where’s Dean?” he barks.

  “Don’t know who you’re talking about,” the bald man mutters.

  What? “He brought me here,” I say softly. “I remember him.”

  “No idea,” the man growls, leaning down, “what you’re talkin’ about.”

  “That smart son of a bitch,” Raide snarls.

  I don’t understand. I must be missing something.

  “Now, you two are going on a nice road trip, then a boat trip, then a swimming vacation at the bottom of the ocean.”

  My heart leaps. What? My eyes turn to Raide again and he’s staring at me now. He doesn’t look scared, but he certainly doesn’t look too pleased either.

  “Dean tell you to do that?” he finally says to Baldy.

  “No idea who Dean is. Just got told I need to do this. Girl goes first. I was instructed you’re to watch he
r die.”

  I flinch.

  “No idea why you’d be told that. I don’t even fuckin’ know her,” Raide mutters.

  They all raise their brows. “That so?”

  “Yeah.” Raide shrugs. “That’s so.”

  The man in charge grins and says, “Then it won’t bother you if we kill her?”

  Raide looks bored. “Nope.”

  He’s joking? Right? He’s playing them. He has to be. He wouldn’t risk letting me get killed.

  “Well, then, no point in waiting.” Baldy reaches down and hauls me up quickly.

  I scream and twist as he slams me against the wall, then there’s a knife to my throat. I don’t even know where he got it from, but everything in my world just stops and all I can do is shake violently. I cry out and whisper, “Raide.” My eyes turn to him but his expression is hard.

  “You sure you don’t care for her?”

  “Positive.”

  He presses the knife into my flesh some more.

  “Raide!” I scream.

  Does he think they won’t do it?

  “You know what? I think I’ll enjoy her a bit first. Get on your knees.” He drops me to the ground and I scurry away from him, but he takes hold of my hair and pulls me back.

  That’s when Raide loses it—he lunges forward and I hear a loud crack, then a thump. A gun is fired and I topple forward, landing on my face. I want to turn but my cheek is burning and I’m frozen in fear, waiting for the fatal bullet to be shot into my back. I close my eyes, trying to breathe as I hear the grunting sounds, and then the door slams.

  I turn slowly after a few minutes of silence to see we’re alone once more, with a dead body. Raide is on all fours, panting, and there’s blood running from his arm. The bald man is facedown on the floor, but there’s a good deal of blood coming from around his face and neck. I don’t even want to know what Raide did to him.

  I force myself to my hands and knees and crawl toward Raide. When I reach him, I stretch my hand out and lift his shirt. “Raide,” I cry, “you’ve been shot!”