Color of Deception

by Khara Campbell

  “Visitation?” Pete assumed he wanted to ask for more money – or worse. Make good on his threat to get custody of Carl. But visitation?

  “I want to be a father figure in his life. Besides, he needs to have a black face in his life. He is black. No offense, but you can’t fully prepare a young black man for life when you have no clue of the difficulties he would have to face.” Plus I want to teach him not to make the same dumb mistakes I’ve made in my life. Getting involved with Porsha is one of them. And the other crap I’ve got my hands in that I need to straighten the heck up. “I want Carl to know who I am.”

  Pete was quiet for a long time. He knew one challenge of raising Carl was the fact that he didn’t feel adequate with knowing how to prepare Carl for the cruel world he would have to face as a black man. Heck, just months ago he despised blacks just because of the color of their skin because it reminded him of the black man that killed his wife. So although reformed from his brief hatred, he wasn’t naïve to the fact that racism existed and that there were people that didn’t flinch in demonstrating their hate. He wished he would be able to protect Carl from all of that, but he knew it was impossible. The thought made him sick that he was once one of those racist bastards – but thank God for forgiveness and healing!

  “How do I know you won’t take off with him during one of your visits?”

  Roger laughed. “We both know that if I wanted custody of my son the courts would have no problem handing him over to his biological black father.” He sat back against the chair and allowed his long legs to stretch out in front of him and crisscrossed them at the ankles. “So no, I won’t take off with him during one of my visits.”

  “If I agree to this—”

  “If you agree to this?” Roger spat, forgetting just moments ago he was the one asking, not demanding to see his son.

  “Yes! If I agree to the visitations. I want to ensure that you won’t be using the ‘I’m going to get custody because I’m the biological black father’ over my head. If you want your son then fight for custody, if not I’m not in the mood for any more of your schemes.” Pete countered, placing his forearms on the desk and leaning forward to emphasize his point. If he had to deal with Roger he wanted him to be straight with him, even if that meant facing each other in court. He didn’t want that, but he also didn’t want to be running around like a fool unsure of when Roger would want to use his son as a pawn again.

  Roger regarded Pete for a moment. Pete wasn’t weak or gullible as he’d expected. “Like I said, I just want to have visitation with my son. I’m not BS-ing you! I’m man enough to admit that you’ve done a great job so far raising him. He looks good. Carlisha would be happy.” Besides I have no right to raise him since I didn’t want him to begin with. But he is my son and I want him to know who I am.

  Pete accepted the compliment, though he wished he could turn back the hands of time and apologize to Carlisha for pushing her away after Moriah’s death. She was like a daughter to him at one point and it killed him now when he remembered how cold he was toward her. But now he had a chance to make it up to her by taking care of her son.

  Pete blew a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “Alright. But we’ll have to have a written agreement about the conditions of the visits. That way we’re all on the same page. He is your son, but I am his legal guardian.” Pete sat back in his chair. He couldn’t believe he just agreed to this.

  “I just want a few hours a week on my days off. I’m cool about a written agreement.”

  “What about your wife?” Pete asked, suddenly remembering that Porsha attacked Carlisha hours before she died in childbirth. Although she wasn’t found guilty of causing Carlisha’s death, the thought of Carl being around her made him uncomfortable. “She assaulted Carlisha. How does she feel about you wanting visitation?” He desperately wanted to renege on his verbal agreement for visitation. How could he have forgotten that Roger was married to Porsha? If she did something to hurt Carl, Pete knew he would end up in jail, no doubt about it. That woman killed Carl’s mother as far as he was concerned.

  “She doesn’t need to know.” Pete looked at him skeptically. “She won’t be around when he’s with me,” Roger assured him. No way do I want her to poison my son’s mind like she’s already done to her rotten kids.

  “That will be part of the agreement then. Under no circumstance will Carl be around your wife,” Pete said through gritted teeth. Roger was Carl’s father and the fact that he wanted to have a relationship with his son was commendable considering he’d been ghost for months. Carlisha must have told him about her pregnancy. He knew he had a son for months and for whatever reason denied it. But now he was stepping up and Pete couldn’t deny him or Carl that despite the nutcase he had for a wife.

  “Have something written up, I’ll look it over and sign.”

  Pete nodded. “I’ll have my lawyer write something up.”

  Roger stood up. “I would like to keep this between us. You or me can write an agreement and have it notarized. No lawyers!”

  Pete hesitated. “Alright!”

  “Good. I’ll like to see him before I go.”

  Pete stood up, rounded his desk and walked toward the closed office door. Before opening the door he turned to Roger. “I know you are Carl’s biological father, but if you do anything to hurt him, you and I will have some serious problems!” He moved two fingers back and forth between the two of them.

  “Trust me, I’m not a dude you want to mess with. But I appreciate your concern for my son. It’s duly noted,” Roger said in a serious tone.

  Chapter 43

  “I can’t believe you agreed to visitations,” Debra said packing Carl’s diaper bag.

  “He wants to have a relationship with his son. As a man and as a father to Carl now, I can’t deny him that.” Pete looked over at Debra now packing a change of clothes into the bag while he changed Carl’s stinky diaper. He never told her about the five thousand dollars he gave Roger to not go to the courts for custody. Five grand and allowing Carl visitations with Roger was the least of his worries if it kept Carl under his care. It was Saturday, two days since Roger requested to be able to spend time with his child. Roger and Pete agreed to the terms, signed and had it notarized. Roger would get Carl once a week for a few hours. Pete looked back down at the squirming baby wanting to do anything but lie still to get his diaper changed. Pete pulled out some wipes and began wiping Carl’s butt. He was now a diaper changing pro – although he would pass on changing stinky diapers in a heartbeat. He held his breath as he continued with the task.

  “I know it’s the right thing – he is Carl’s father. But…” Debra sat down in the rocking chair after packing the bag and placing on the floor near the door. “I…I just don’t want to lose him,” she admitted. “I know I’m probably being selfish, but that’s how I feel.”

  Pete wrapped the diaper up quickly and placed it in the diaper genie pail. He sprayed the air freshener near the changing table, then released a breath. Carl was still strapped safely to the changing table. “Believe me, I share your concerns. But visitations are better than us fighting for custody in court. Plus it’s important for Carl to know his father. Carlisha’s no longer here, I don’t want him to not know either of his parents. Carl’s best interest is most important to me right now.” Pete fastened a clean diaper on Carl then pulled up his denim pants.

  “You’re right. And he confirmed that his wife won’t be around Carl?” Concern etched her face as she looked up at him while he unfasten Carl from the changing table.

  “Yes. He doesn’t even want her to know about the visitations. We’ll just have to trust that everything will be okay until things prove otherwise. Which I hope it won’t.”

  The doorbell rang.

  Debra hopped up from the rocking chair, walked over to the bedroom door and picked up Carl’s diaper bag. “Well, he’s here.”

  Debra opened the door. Roger stood on the other side, he wore a leather jacket protecting him
from the early morning temps of fifty-five degrees. He had his hands in the pockets of his jeans. Looking at him closely now, she could see traces of Carl on his face. His nose and mouth. They definitely were father and son. He’s handsome. The thought brought a smile to her face as she imagined what Carl would look like when he grows up.

  “Good morning!” She greeted.

  Roger pulled his hand out of his pocket and offered it to her. “Good morning!” He smiled at her while she took his hand in greeting. “I want to apologize for my behavior that day. I was really messed up, so I’m sorry.” Roger figured if he was allowing Pete to take care of his son that being cordial would suit them all best.

  Debra was taken aback by his apology evident by the shocked look on her face. “Apology accepted.”

  “He’s ready to go,” Pete said after he came to the door holding Carl. He had put on a jacket and placed a baseball cap on Carl’s tiny head to protect him from the cooler autumn temperature. “I need to get his car seat out of my car.”

  Debra stepped aside while Pete handed Carl over to his father. Roger accepted him reluctantly, unsure of how to hold him. Carl went into his arms without a fuss. His big bright eyes looked up at Roger as if he was trying to memorize his features. Roger smiled down at his son, then kissed him on his forehead.

  “Ahh, cooo,” Carl blabbered, reaching for the gold chain around Roger’s neck.

  “Oh, you better watch out. He loves grabbing chains and I have two popped ones to prove it,” Debra laughed.

  Roger looked at her. “He likes chains huh?” He looked back at his son who was still trying to reach for his chain. Roger slipped the chain under his shirt, out of sight, but Carl still tried to get at it by pulling on Roger’s shirt collar.

  “Did you child proof your home like we agreed? He’s crawling now so he is curious about everything,” Pete asked with a heavy heart from having to hand over Carl.

  “Got it covered!” Roger wasn’t taking Carl to his house, no way was he going to chance Porsha seeing him with his son. So he made arrangements with one of his boys that was a single father to two children, whose home was child friendly. After all the hell Porsha had put him through over the years, Roger felt like Carl was the best thing that had happened to him for a long time and he wanted the best for his son. Although it was Saturday he was able to get away from home early for his first visitation with his son. Porsha was out of town for a hair show and the kids were with her mother. But he still didn’t want to chance taking Carl home.

  “Alright, let’s get his car seat,” Pete stepped onto the porch.

  “Don’t forget his diaper bag. His bottles, food, change of clothes, everything you’ll need is all in there,” Debra handed the bag to Roger. She had a lump in her throat as she silently prayed Pete was doing the right thing by allowing the visitations. She stepped closer to Roger and quickly kissed Carl on the cheek. “I’ll see you when you get back, have fun,” she spoke to her godson.

  “Ahh yay a,” Carl cooed in response.

  Roger turned and followed Pete to the car.

  **KC**

  Debra watched from the bay window as Roger drove away with Carl safely strapped in his car seat in the back seat. Pete walked back up the driveway and into the house.

  “I guess this is how parents feel when their kids go away from them for the first time,” Debra said after she heard Pete enter the living room. She turned and looked at him, she was sitting on the couch faced toward the window.

  “I think you’re right.” Pete walked over then sat down next to her on the couch. He sighed. “He’s going to bring back by three.”

  “What are you going to do with yourself until then?” It was only nine in the morning. She sat back against the couch. Suddenly she felt uncomfortable sitting mere inches away from him without Carl as a distraction. She tried to hide her discomfort with small talk.

  “I was thinking about going to see a movie. That new action movie is out. Would you like to join me?” He smiled flashing his pearly whites in an attempt to persuade her. Weeks ago when she told him she wasn’t interested in dating, he’d reluctantly agreed to back off. She didn’t sleep over at the house anymore when she was over taking care of Carl. She either left when he was put down for bed or took him home with her. But despite her not wanting to pursue a relationship outside of taking care of Carl and working together – he wanted more. She’d made him feel things he thought he would never feel again for another woman.

  Pete watched Debra. He could tell she was trying to come up with an excuse. Her long natural red hair lay bountifully on her shoulders while some hair was pressed against her back as she sat on the couch. He itched to reach over and run his fingers through her hair and pull her forward so he could capture her full lips with a kiss. He looked at her lips now remembering how sweet they tasted in his mouth. He felt a twitch in his loin just from the memory. He cast the thoughts away quickly to stop the growth in his southern region.

  “I…I’m…”

  “We’re just going as friends, my treat. It’s not a date.” But he would pretend like it was.

  She held her bottom lip between her teeth. “It does sound tempting. I’ve actually been meaning to see that movie.”

  “Okay good. We can see a matinee and be back hours before Carl’s to return home,” he stood up. “I’ll purchase our tickets online. I think there’s a ten o’clock showing.”

  “Great!”

  **KC**

  Even though their going out to the movies together wasn’t supposed to be a date – Debra felt like she was on one. And for the life of her – she really enjoyed Pete’s company. Enjoyed him opening the doors for her. Enjoyed him reaching over shyly and taking her hand in his as they walked everywhere they went. She enjoyed when he whispered in her ear during the movie, telling her what he’d liked about a scene that just passed on the screen. She got goosebumps every time his warm breath brushed her earlobe. It felt so erotic and quickly reminded her of her almost three years of celibacy. She’d been aroused all day and would have to take a frigid shower before she combusted.

  They arrived back to Pete’s house at one. On their way back they stopped at a fast food restaurant to grab burgers, fries and soft drinks to go. “Thanks again for treating me to the movies,” Debra told him, sitting on a stool at the kitchen island unwrapping her burger. “And lunch.”

  “Thanks for having pity on me and lending me your time,” he winked at her, then took a bite into his burger. He was sitting next to her at the island.

  “Ah yes, the handsome lonely widower needed my company on this beautiful Saturday. Poor man couldn’t find a lovely date so he had to beg the next best thing…”

  “You think I’m handsome?” he asked lifting his brow, ignoring her tease. His dark blue eyes were trained on her. She had her burger midair about to take a bite.

  Debra’s face flushed red. He had her on the spot. “Yes, I think you’re handsome.” She took a bite of her burger.

  “What else do you think about me?” he was intrigued. After she allowed him to hold her hand today he felt like he won the jackpot.

  That you have the sexiest blue eyes I’ve ever seen on a man. That being in your arms feels like heaven, which I dream about almost every night. And you lips – oh your lips taste like honey and I’ve been like a crack addict thinking about ways to get another hit. Instead she said “I think you’re an honorable man for stepping up to the plate to take care of Carl. You’re a great businessman running a successful business. And you’re nice to be around. I really enjoyed the movie with you today.”

  A huge smiled spread across Pete’s face. “You want to know what I think about you?”

  She nodded trying not to get lost in the depths of his eyes. If she did he would really see her true feelings. As much as she had been trying to fight it by avoiding staying over at his house while watching Carl, keeping things at work strictly business, she was falling for him and she was beyond scared about her developing feelings
.

  “I think you’re a very beautiful woman Debra,” Pete reached over and did what he had been tempted to do all day – he ran his fingers through her long natural red hair. He smiled when she didn’t pull away. He could see the rapid rise and fall of her chest. Pete knew she was just as attracted to him as he was to her. “You’re caring and nurturing. You take such good care of Carl. Carlisha couldn’t have chosen a better godmother. You are driven, which I find very sexy,” he admitted. He could see the shock in her eyes at his admission. But he knew she had to know that he found her sexy. “I also think that you’re afraid of what is brewing between us and I have to admit I’m scared too. But…” Debra slid from the stool, threw her arms around his neck and drew him in a passionate kiss that literally took his breath away.

  Pete felt her tongue in his mouth and heard a groan of pleasure that he thought came from him, but actually it had escaped Debra’s mouth. Pete was drowning in her kiss, he couldn’t get enough of her. His hands were exploring her breasts, her waist, her hips, her thighs.

  “I want you,” she moaned, now kissing his neck and enticingly dragging her teeth along his collar bone.

  Pete didn’t think he heard her right. Did she just initiate…

  “I want you,” Debra said again, boldly popping the buttons off his shirt in an attempt to get it off of him.

  Pete took her by the hand and directed them upstairs to his bedroom in haste. Before they entered the room his shirt was completely off and Debra’s sweater dress was now being pulled over her head. Next her leggings were snagged off in a frenzy. He finished undressing himself as he watched her. He sucked in a breath at the sight of her voluptuous body in black lace bra and panties. He didn’t think he could grow even harder than he did at that moment.

  Debra had envisioned what Pete would look like in the buff many nights, but reality was better than anything she imagined. They both now stood naked feasting lustfully over each other bodies. Within minutes they succumbed to their temptations and laid spent in the bed snuggled in each other embrace.