Tommy Boy: A Panty Whisperer Prequel
Page 6
“Fine, fuck it then. I’m a smart guy. I’ll find a job and do the bare minimum to get by. If they fire me, I’ll just find another. I don’t need a degree to do that shit. I’m going to live my life on my terms. The way I want.”
Joel nods. “I just want you to be happy. There’s a difference between happy and delusional, though, so I’m just making sure you aren’t the latter. You’ve been through a lot in a short amount of time.”
I can practically feel CC cradling her arms around me, nuzzling into my ear.
Joel grins. “You haven’t smiled like this in a while. So I’m all for it, man. Whatever you decide.”
Joel looks over the other way at some mountains and I hear a faint whisper in my ear. “I love you. Goodbye, Thomas.”
Maybe it’s my subconscious playing tricks on me. I don’t believe that even if it is true. It’s her. I just know it. “I love you too, baby. Goodbye,” I whisper where Joel can’t hear.
And just like that, the heat disappears, leaving behind the biting chill around my body, but my heart stays warm. I told her I loved her, and I got to say goodbye. And she did the same.
Acknowledgements
If I tried to thank everyone who’s helped me with this whole series it would be its own novel. A long one. Writing and producing a book isn’t a solitary effort. It takes a team and there’s no other team I’d rather have in all the world.
Family is first and I couldn’t do this without Mrs H and the Boy. They get me through everything. They ARE everything. I love you guys so much and thank you! Also, I suppose I’ll throw Lil Bro and Seester in the family section. You’re both dickheads, but you’re my dickheads. Wait what?
My PA Rachel Saucy-Owl. I have my head up my ass 95% of the time and she tries to manage that and keep me on track. She does a ton of stuff behind the scenes in addition to everything else. And she made the coolest quiz bowl thingie ever for my birthday in the group.
My content editor Katie Ekvall at Underline This Editing. She is a fecking bamf. I don’t even really try and be lazy in sections anymore because nothing gets by her. She’s a red-pen wielding sorceress.
Stacey Broadbent at Spell Bound. The greatest copy editor of all time who also happens to be an author and a fan. But more importantly, a friend. Thank you so much! You're a rock star.
Popkitty who took Tommy’s character and replicated him perfectly on the cover of this book. I’m just awestruck at how amazing it turned out.
CP Smith who formatted the shit out of these books! Or at least she will as soon as I get her these acknowledgments. Seriously, she’s waiting on them as I type this.
Neda Amini at Ardent Prose PR. A great friend who always offers advice and help whenever I need it, and just good conversation in general about books. I love our chats.
Vivian Freeman at Beaute De Livres. My fav Aussie and book pimp machine. Thanks so much for all that you do.
Lauren Lascola-Lesczynski, who was born to raise money for good causes and gift a billion books to people. And she reads and reviews and does a billion other things for a billion authors. She’s incredible.
Laura McHale, my bri-ish admin in my group who always keeps things entertaining. Thank you!
All of my good friends at the Harem. I just wanna hug all of you. There are too many to list out, but thank you so very much. I have so much fun daily and it’s the best group I could hope for. You are amazing, and I don’t think I can say enough about all of you. My heart is so happy that you all take the time to read my books and help spread the word about them. I love you all, so very much! You aren’t fans. You’re friends. I truly mean that. When one person is down, we pick them up. When one person is up, we lift them up higher. It’s just what we do. You’re just incredible and famazing. Every last one of you.
Helena Hunting, Sarah Piechuta (fuck I hope I spelled her last name right) and Christina Santos over in the Beaver Den. Thanks for letting me hang out and be silly. I love that group so much. It’s a place where I can escape being an author (most of the time) and just be a fan like everyone else that loves to read and gush over books they love.
To all the bloggers who work so hard for so little to spread the word about my books. Thank you so much! A special shout out to Candi Kane who is a wonderful human being and always helps me out whenever she can. I <3 her a ton!! Lisa Reads (who also does a lot of my covers and is a badass mutha) check out The Teaser Pleaser, Cecily Bonney, Sissy, Karen McVino at BBB and all them ladies, Michelle Rodriguez at After Dark, Petra at Love N. Books, Morgan Cross, Holly Shields, Avephoenix, Laura Martinez, JP Uvalle, and so many more. All the Shhluts, SueBee, Warhawke, Ebru, Jabby, Kay, CC, Carlene, Snow, Timitra, Dawn, Lloyda, Kay, Elizabeth, Meredith… Gahhh, I know I’m forgetting some, and I’m so sorry. All the bloggahs. Much love from this guy over here. Thank you, thank you, thank you. You make this industry! You are the industry! Thank you!
All my frat bros in the R&E group (BT Urruela, Mikey Lee, Golden Czermak, Seth King, David Michael, Scott Hildreth, Daryl Banner, and Eddie Cleveland) and all the people in there. You guys are the best. I miss being in there every day but I try to stop by when I can. I love you guys.
All the other authors out there who help spread the word about my work. Elle Ellerton, Kacey Shea, CD Reiss, Roxy Sloane, Dani Wyatt, Celia Aaron, Aria Cole, LJ Shen, KL Kreig, Debra Anastasia, gahhh, I know I’m forgetting so many. If I missed you I’ll get you next time because deadline. I know you understand, lol. Thank you!!
All my fans... I often don’t know what you see in my writing sometimes, but you see it, and I thank you for it. Maybe the self-doubt just comes with the job. But you are amazing and I can’t thank you enough. You make it possible for me to stay at home and do what I love. For that, I am eternally grateful.
To anyone I have forgotten, thank you so much! I will get you next go around. I promise.
Sloane
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Novels by Sloane Howell
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Betrayal is easy, sex is a weapon, and information is power. Maggie Madison sits in the lofty towers of her city during the day, but at night she lurks the seedy underbelly, looking to snare the man who stole her innocence. Her simple quest becomes complicated when she meets a man who is as light as she is dark, as straightforward as she is deceptive. When a villain rises and sets her world alight, she must weigh her need for revenge against the good of the city she vowed to protect.
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Have you ever been pushed to the edge, and then over it? Have you ever had your toes cramp and your head shoot to the sky, trying to log every touch, every feeling in your memory, to reenact every situation later in the shower, or underneath your cool bed sheets? Have you ever had someone own your mind, penetrating every single one of your sexual fantasies, unable to shake free of them?
The thought of me will be a thirst you can't quench, an itch you just can't scratch, a drug that you cannot have. Every time you run your fingers down over your body, longing for that unattainable feeling I gave you, that warm sensation shooting into your toes, that complete surrender of all inhibition, aching for me to have you just one more time, I'll be there, inside your mind...
My name is Joel Hannover and I am the panty whisperer. Some men are good at business, some gifted at mathematics--I'm good at making women come, hard. It's a gift I've possessed my entire life. If there was a girl nobody could bed, I was the first to get there. I always get there. I work as an accounting software consultant. That's a fancy way of saying I'm a salesman. Accounting departments are full of women, dressed conser
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Jessica Moore is one such woman, mid-thirties, bad marriage, basically raising the kids all on her own. She is sexy as hell, she just doesn't know what she's capable of. Will I give her everything she longs for? You'll just have to read to find out...
The Panty Whisperer, Volumes 1 - 5
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JOEL IS BACK!!
This collection includes the original plus four additional fast-paced, panty-dropping short stories.
Have you ever been pushed to the edge, and then over it? Have you ever had your toes cramp and your head shoot to the sky, trying to log every touch, every feeling in your memory, to reenact every situation later in the shower, or underneath your cool bed sheets? Have you ever had someone own your mind, penetrating every single one of your sexual fantasies, unable to shake free of them?
The thought of me will be a thirst you can't quench, an itch you just can't scratch, a drug that you cannot have. Every time you run your fingers down over your body, longing for that unattainable feeling I gave you, that warm sensation shooting into your toes, that complete surrender of all inhibition, aching for me to have you just one more time, I'll be there, inside your mind...
My name is Joel Hannover and I am the panty whisperer. Some men are good at business, some gifted at mathematics--I'm good at making women come, hard. It's a gift I've possessed my entire life. If there was a girl nobody could bed, I was the first to get there. I always get there. I work as an accounting software consultant. That's a fancy way of saying I'm a salesman. Accounting departments are full of women, dressed conservatively, presumed to live boring, mundane lives. Nothing could be further from the truth. These women are unique, sexual creatures, yearning for someone to take them to their breaking point and beyond.
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The thought of me will be a thirst you can't quench, an itch you just can't scratch, a drug that you cannot have. Every time you run your fingers down over your body, longing for that unattainable feeling I gave you, that warm sensation shooting into your toes, that complete surrender of all inhibition, aching for me to have you just one more time, I'll be there, inside your mind...
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