by C. A. Harms
“Nic.”
“I told you from the beginning that your father doesn’t scare me. That hasn’t changed, Em, he’s not gonna force me to walk away from you. No one can.” I arch my brow at him, and he smiles. “Not even you can, sweetheart.”
I want to argue, but what is the point? He has that determined look in his eyes that ensures it will be a battle I would not win.
“I’ve made my mind up about something.”
“What’s that?” I ask as I allow him to move toward me once more as he places one hand on either side of my waist.
“I’m not going to let you end this.” Again I gave him an “oh really” stare. “You can find me and tell me over and over that you don’t want this, but I know different. You still have that same hungry look in your eyes that you held that night of the auction.”
“It was the alcohol.” I try not to smile, but I can’t control it.
“It was me,” he corrects with a cocky smirk. “That look alone, I’ll admit it right now, struck something inside me I didn’t know was there. I knew then that I wanted to be owned by the gorgeous woman in the silver dress, the same gorgeous woman that sits before me now. I didn’t give a shit about anything else other than the way she made my pulse race and my body feel so fucking alive.”
He leans in and brushes his lips over mine. “And you hadn’t even touched me yet. That was enough for me to know that once you did I’d never be the same.”
I rest my forehead to his and try to find all the reasons I’d come up with why he and I couldn’t be together. But the truth is none of them matter anymore; none of them feel like enough to make me walk away.
“For me, Em, there’s no walking away. I tried, I attempted to forget you, but I can’t. The truth is I don’t like what life feels like without you in it.”
“But you haven’t even known me for that long.” I keep my eyes closed, doing my best to hold back the tears.
“Maybe,” he agrees, “but I don’t remember what life was like before I met you and I don’t want to remember.”
That is my breaking point, and I reach out, wrap my arms around his neck, and hold him tightly against me. “I love you, too,” I finally confess, instantly feeling the tension in his shoulders fade.
“Come home with me,” he whispers into the crook of my neck. “I’m not asking for you to move in, though you need to know that offer still stands. I’m asking for you to spend the night. Or the week, month, year, whatever.” I feel his lips turn against my neck and know he is smiling. “I want to hold you close. I need to have you in my arms.”
How I ever thought I could walk away from Nic and remain intact is beyond me. He is demanding and domineering, yet he has such a sweet and gentle side too; one I know he doesn’t show everyone, but freely shows me.
“Can we eat first?”
“As long as you promise me that you won’t change your mind by the time you’re finished.” When he stands tall, his stare connecting with mine, I allow my palm to run along his chest. The firmness of his pecs, the curve of his torso as it tapers toward his waist is a reminder of just how perfect this man is, both inside and out.
“I promise,” I finally reply. “Besides, I’ve missed Jax.”
The way Nic rolls his eyes makes me laugh. It is so childlike and free of the tension that filled the room only a few minutes ago.
“Plus…” He narrows his eyes like he’s prepared for my next smartass dig, only I was completely serious about my next confession. “I miss feeling safe, and when I’m with you, I cannot help but feel as though I’m protected.”
“Always.” He leans in quick and kisses me with determination. I swear in his movements I feel his lips tremble against my own but I don’t question it. I embrace that he and I are an us. Fighting it is a waste of time.
Nicholas
I honestly can’t remember the last time I’d slept so soundly. I feel completely relaxed and entirely rested as I stretch my arms over my head and feel the tickle of Emerson’s hair over my chest.
She whimpers in protest, thinking I am moving away from her and grips onto me a little tighter. Her leg lifts as she places it over my waist and hooks it on the opposite side, almost like it was an anchor to hold me securely to her. I turn my body toward hers and allow the palm of my hand to slide up her bare thigh.
Last night was the second night she’d been here and if I have it my way, she’ll never leave again. I meant what I said—I want her here, but I won’t push. Even though we’ve slept side by side in the same bed together the last couple of nights, we’ve still refrained from taking things any further than kissing. This, what was taking place between us, was more than sex.
I am a guy, a guy with needs, and when a gorgeous woman, one that I happen to fucking love is rubbing up on me the way Emerson currently is, she makes it hard to focus on anything more than my growing erection. I miss being inside her, feeling her body respond to my touch. I also miss the soft whimpers and pleased coos she shares when I do to her just what she’d want most.
I close my eyes tightly, trying to rid myself of the images of her naked body beneath mine. The way she’d look up at me just as I’d push in deep, her mouth parted, her eyes glazed over with need.
Jesus, I feel myself slipping and fast. The weight of Emerson’s body slowly grows heavier, and I know my chances of escaping are now limited. If she moves her legs even an inch lower, she’d…oh fuck, too late.
“Good morning.” I count in my head as I remind myself why letting her make the first move is best. I swear my body is shaking with need.
“Morning.” Instantly I begin to lecture myself. That was a “fuck me now” voice for sure. I try to recover as I clear my throat and start again. “How’d you sleep?”
She shifts her leg and pauses when she comes into contact with my cock. It is so hard at this point it is starting to grow painful.
“I slept good,” she confesses, keeping her leg in the same position. My hardness presses against her inner thigh and my head races with all kinds of inappropriate thoughts. “I always have when you hold me, though.”
Now I just feel like an asshole for imagining her panting and writhing beneath me.
“Can I ask you something?”
I can’t quite register her mood yet. “You can ask me anything.”
“Is there a reason why you haven’t touched me?” Her question surprises me as I shift my upper body away, which triggers her to lift her head. “I just meant that I've been here for two nights now and I feel like maybe you’re reluctant to do anything more than kiss me, and I guess I was just wondering—”
“Are you kidding me right now?”
Her forehead wrinkles in confusion.
“I’ve lain in bed next to you for two nights now, worried that if I pushed you, I’d only somehow mess this up.”
“Mess what up?”
“Us, this, fuck.” I run my hand over my face as I try to find the words to explain what is running through my mind. “I don’t want you to feel like that’s all we are. But not for a second do I want you to think I don’t want you.” I grab her leg and lift my hips to press my still hard cock against her. “That is me doing my best to let you lead baby, but it’s killing me. I’ll admit that without hesitation. I can’t help the way I crave you, but I won’t have you feel like that's all this is.” I remember Gianna’s words the time she told me to get to know Emerson and not just her body. I knew her body, every curve, every trigger spot that drove her crazy, but I wanted to know that and so much more.
“You can’t mess this up,” she assures me as she slowly climbs over my body, my hardness nestling firmly between her thighs. When she shifts against me, I grip her hips, trying to remain focused on her words and not the way her body is practically screaming out what I need her to say. “I know we’re more than sex,” she confesses, her cheeks slightly reddened, reminding me of the sweet, soft side of her, the one I’ve wanted to corrupt from the beginning. “Truth is that when we are tog
ether, when you’re touching me, I cannot help but feel like nothing else matters. I love when we get lost in one another, the way everything around us fades away and all that’s left is the way I feel at that very moment.”
She rocks her hips against me and this time I do nothing to stop her. Instead, I lift my hips and shift against her.
“I want you to touch me.” Her soft whisper sounds so sweet. “I want to see that look in your eyes when you’re so lost in me that you can’t think straight.”
I want that too.
She grips my hands at her waist and I allow her to move them up her body. In the process, her shirt rises just before she presses my hands over her now exposed breasts. “I need to feel you.”
This woman has a way of knocking the air from lungs. She weakens me, leaves me breathless, and I love every fucking minute of it.
“Please.” She takes my hesitation as me questioning what she is saying. But I am just so wound up, so desperate to do just what she asked, that I need just a minute for my brain to catch up.
“I don’t want to scare you,” I say in a pained whisper as I release her left breast and cup the back of her neck, pulling her upper body downward.
“I’ll never fear you.”
I close my eyes tightly, accepting the trust I know she just confessed. That was a huge step for Emerson.
“You just might change your mind if you were able to see the things I’m already doing to you inside my head.” I am like a madman, so fucking wired I could swear I am on the verge of a heart attack, my heart is beating so rapidly.
Emerson reaches between our bodies and I look down to see her moving her panties to the side. Suddenly I feel her against me, so warm and wet. “Don’t hold back, Mr. Vaughn,” she teases and taunts. “Show me what you’ve got.”
She lets out a squeal when I shift the weight of her body and she lands on the bed at my side with a small bounce. Quickly, as my hands shake and my legs tremble, I grip the light pink material of her underwear and pull them down her legs. She does all she can to help me, as her legs shake with need.
I want to take the time to cherish her, but I know there is time for that later. Right now I need to feel her around me. I can’t control the ache inside me, the animalistic craving to reclaim what is mine.
The moment I press against her, she whimpers and lifts her hips off the bed. Our eyes connect, and I drive forward hard and fast, hearing her gasp at the sudden fullness. She bites her lip, her muscles tighten around my cock and that is all it takes for the last bit of control I have to snap.
Together we are starved for more; nothing feels deep enough, fast enough. I just want her closer. I have that ache inside me to fill, and I understand now that it will never be. I will never have enough of her; I can never get my fix. She owns me, she is a part of me, and without her, I would feel empty.
Our pace is forceful as we claw at one another. Hungry kisses, needy words and passionate striving for something so profound it is hard to imagine anything more powerful.
“You’re everything,” she pants the words. “I don’t need anything else, I just need you.”
I’m not an emotional man, not usually, but it is hard to hold back as she confesses what I long to hear.
“You have me, Em.” I slow my pace as I look into her eyes. Long, slow strokes as we watch one another. “I’m yours.” I mean it. I am completely hers. “I love you,” I kiss her just as I feel her tighten around me, “so fucking much.” The words leave my lips in a groan and I feel my release take over.
I bury my face into the crook of her neck and we remain like this until we fall asleep. I’m still buried inside her and her arms are wrapped around me to hold me in place.
I hear the faint sound of my phone ringing, yet I can’t bring myself to move. Not when Emerson still holds onto me like I am her lifeline. I’ve never felt anything like what I am feeling now, knowing she is finally letting me in, finally relying on me. It is a hard move for her. I know this because she’s never known a man to care for her without wanting something in return. To me, just having her here is thanks enough.
The ringing stops only to pick up again. I do my best to stretch out in search of my phone while also holding onto Emerson, for fear of waking her.
The ringing grows louder as I lift the phone and answer it quickly.
“Yeah.” I look over to ensure I haven’t woken her and am happy to find her still sleeping soundly.
“Nic, listen, man,” it’s Perry, “I know you’re on leave, but you might wanna get in here.” He pauses, which only makes my heart race with all the possibilities. Fear is hitting me with the idea that something may have happened to Spencer or even Shannon. “They just brought in Hector Mansfield on murder charges. They found the tapes, the missing ones. It’s bad man, some really fucked up shit.”
I look over at the beauty that lies half on my chest, and I hug her closer. My chest hollows and I immediately wonder what something like this can do to her. The man is a prick, top of the chain asshole, but he is still her father.
“Give me time to get dressed and I’ll be in.” I don’t wait for him to respond before ending our call, and turn my body entirely so I can pull Emerson closer. For a few minutes I just want to feel her, hold her, before everything gets turned upside down.
Emerson
I don’t miss the tension rolling off Nic when he crawls out of bed and starts to get dressed. He says it is nothing, just work, but it feels like it is more. I don’t push him for answers, only lie on my side and watch as he pulls on his jeans one leg at a time before grabbing a t-shirt off a hanger in his closet. The muscles of his arms and back flex with each movement.
Even when he leans over and places a kiss to my temple as he whispers “Goodbye,” I feel like he is miles away.
I don’t know how long I remain in bed after he leaves. I think I may have dozed off for a while. I feel a sense of disappointment when I wake to find he is still gone.
I stretch out my arms to my sides, twisting just enough to relieve a small amount of the ache in my back that our long night before caused. Despite the crazy things going on in my life, I have to admit that allowing Nic in feels good. He is the one great thing in my world, and part of me knows that if nothing else works out, having him here by my side will be enough. It will be more than enough because he gives me hope. He gives me peace.
I crawl from bed, walk toward the bathroom and reach inside to flip on the shower, allowing the water to heat up. I turn toward the mirror and find my smiling reflection there to meet me. I have absolutely nothing, barely any money to live on, no job, car, or even family, but I’d never felt more fulfilled. It is strange, really, that a week ago I felt like everything I was had been stripped from me. The reality is that everything that was dragging me down are the only things I’ve lost. Nic was right; I have to learn to love myself, and that is getting easier every day, especially when I have him by my side to remind me.
I remove my panties and his oversized t-shirt and step into the shower, welcoming the warm water as it begins to cascade over my body. The firm beat of the drops hitting my back and shoulders is relaxing. I tilt my head back, wetting my hair and allow my mind to remember the night before.
The gentle roam of Nic’s hands as he reached around from behind, and the way he cupped my breast just before he guided himself inside me. I meant it before when I said that he made me lose my mind. He was able to take away my worries so quickly and replace them with nothing but calm.
I find myself wishing he is there with me, with his big hands and his soft kiss. I know I need to get on with my life and find some stability other than Nic, but I am enjoying my little cocoon we’ve created. The Nic bubble I am lost in feels too good to leave just yet.
After my hair is washed and rinsed, I flip the handle down and twist it to turn the water off. With one towel on my head and the other securely wrapped around my body, I exit the bathroom and walk toward the kitchen. Jax weaves around my ankles over and o
ver, making it hard to walk, but I’ll admit the furry guy is another bonus in my life right now. He loves me unconditionally and makes it known. I still find Nic’s jealousy over having to share me with his cat very amusing, yet immensely satisfying at the same time.
As I round the entryway to the kitchen, I let out a loud squeal when I’m met with a woman’s voice.
“You must be the reason why my son hasn’t returned my calls over the last forty-eight hours.”
My heart racing, I twist quickly and in the process practically trip over Jax, who seems wholly unaffected by our company. In the process, the towel on my head begins to slip, and I reach up to grab it.
Guess what happens next?
Yep, you guessed correctly. The other towel, the one covering all my girlie bits—well, it too begins to slip. I release my grasp on the one on my head, doing my best to grab the other just as it falls, now covering only the center of my body as my hand holds it in place. Held tight in the middle, just over my breasts, this movement leaves the outer part of my thighs and hips visible.
Can you say mortified?
Then the front door opens, and Nic stands there looking between me and the woman I now know as his mother. I’d say his first reaction was confusion, just before laughter falls from his lips when he takes in my appearance.
There I stand, shell-shocked, unable to decide what to do next and he laughs. His chest is shaking uncontrollably, and he has a grin so wide I can see all his teeth as he tips his head backward.
“Good afternoon, son,” the woman says with equal amusement. “I thought I’d come over and make sure you were still alive since you hadn’t called me back. I can see now that you are very much alive and from the looks of it, fully functioning in all aspects.”
Kill me now.
“Mother,” Nic still chuckles as I peek up to see him stepping closer to his mother, “this is Emerson, my girlfriend.” Call me crazy, but hearing him tell his mother I am his girlfriend sends excitement racing through me. “She bought me at an auction when she saw how hot of an item I was.” I look up at him with my mouth hanging open in shock. “She refused to let any other woman take me from her.”
