A Sixer of Tequila

by Tricia O'Malley

  “I do everything my best,” Miss Elva preened.

  She wasn’t wrong.

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  The Flamingo King did not disappoint.

  First of all, the man strode up in a bedazzled rhinestoned flamingo suitcoat, complete with a rhinestone hat and a cape. All he needed was a walking stick and he’d look like a 1970s pimp. Miss Elva all but swooned and Rafe, despite his attempts at being more mature, disappeared in a snit.

  “Elva, you are a vision. Will you be my date tonight?” David asked.

  I hid a smile at the nervousness in his face. Even if he had a little weight on him, and his tan was just a touch too orange, he was still a handsome man, and it seemed he was really into Miss Elva. They made quite the dashing pair, I had to admit, even if you did need sunglasses to look directly at them.

  “I’d like nothing more,” Miss Elva said, and took David’s arm. “Now, introduce me to all your fancy people and I’ll make them jealous with my fabulous outfit.”

  “Then we’ll give them your cards, darling, and they’ll snap up your creations in an instant.”

  “That’s the plan,” Miss Elva said. Then they drifted into the melee, the sea of people seeming to part for them, then swallow them whole.

  “Well, team? What say you?” Luna asked.

  “I say… the Flamingo King throws a hell of a party,” Beau observed.

  He wasn’t wrong. There were three wide white tents set up, lit up with string lights, disco balls, and all sorts of flashing lights and smoke machines. There were cage dancers, a stage for a Soul Train set up, and another stage where a band was just warming up by taking the bass for a walk.

  Yes, I’ve always wanted to say that.

  Waitresses rolled by on roller-skates, shaking their sequined bottoms to the music. There were more sequins than I think I’d ever seen in my life. Nobody had held anything back – it was one massive party of famous people trying to outdo each other. As this was one of my first major galas with famous people, I had to wonder if this was just how all parties were for them. Were their lives just constant competitions, trying to one-up each other? It sounded exhausting to me.

  “I’m kind of dying for those roller-skates. Did you see they have rhinestones on them?” Beau whispered in my ear.

  “You could open a drive-in restaurant. You know, where the waiters roll up to you on roller-skates and you eat in your car?”

  “That’s not a bad idea,” Beau mused.

  “Where would it be?” Luna asked.

  “There’s that lot for sale by the highway. It’d be perfect for people looking for a fun place to stop to eat on the way to Key West, without having to go too far off the road.”

  “What would I call it?” Beau asked.

  “Roll On Out?”

  “Keep It Rollin’?” Luna offered.

  “Rock & Roll?”

  “That’s How We Roll,” I decided, and Beau crowed in delight.

  “Want to go in with me?” Beau looked from Luna to me.

  “Us? In the restaurant biz?” I looked at Luna and she shrugged a delicate shoulder.

  “Could we do a drive-in movie too?”

  “Roll the Tape?” I offered, and Beau laughed again.

  “I suspect we can make a lot of puns.”

  “I’m in.”

  “Me too.”

  “Welcome to business, partners. Now, let’s go find the food. Because you know, that’s how we roll,” Beau said, testing it out.

  I groaned. “That’s gonna get old.”

  “Not as old as those tired maxi-dresses you wear.”

  “Oh, bitchy,” I said, poking him in the ribs.

  “Sorry, mama wants a cocktail,” Beau apologized.

  “It’s okay. I’ll take some time to revamp my wardrobe. Promise.”

  “Good. Now, where’s the fine man of yours?”

  “Cash? I don’t know, I haven’t seen him yet.” A low dredge of worry trickled through my stomach, but I shook it aside. After all, the man could take care of himself.

  “I see food. And Captain Woodley,” Beau said, veering off with a little wave.

  “I’m going to talk to Mama Jean,” Luna said, pointing to where Mama Jean was standing. She had poured herself into a mermaid gown, complete with faux sparkle breast covers. I had to pause for a moment just to let the sheer impact of Mama Jean hit me, before I smiled.

  “She really turned herself out tonight.”

  “I would expect nothing less. I think Miss Elva’s found her long-lost sister.”

  “Isn’t that the truth? Okay, I’ll be back around. I’m just going to circle and see if I can find Cash.”

  “See you on the hour, remember?” Luna tapped a slim silver watch at her wrist.

  “Yup, I remember. Plus, you know, I’m hungry.”

  “You’re always hungry.”

  “It’s part of my charm.”

  I strolled the perimeter of the party, keeping my eyes out for Cash, but also doing my best to catalog all the celebrities and their outfits. There was a strict no-cellphone rule at the party, so we’d all left ours at home. But walking through the gala? Gah! I itched for my phone to take photographs. It was like all my celebrity gossip magazines had exploded at once in front of me in real time.

  One famous actress, whom I knew for a fact had been featured on the arm of another famous actor in last week’s magazine, was canoodling with someone else. Another, who I was certain I’d read had just had a nose job, sucked down champagne like it was water. In the corner, the skinny Adam Levine-style man was talking too fast to a crowd around him and they all laughed politely, though I sensed it was more because he was famous than that he actually had something funny to say. And was that Heidi Klum in a green disco-ball dress? I craned my head to look. I loved her on that designer television show.

  Now, I did love my celebrity gossip mags, but when it came to reality television shows, some of my favorites were the ones where people had to design something or cook a meal. It was interesting to me to see how people performed under pressure, and I always enjoyed when they nailed it and delivered a showstopper. I loved seeing people win, so it made me feel good to cheer people on.

  Still, I couldn’t find Cash. I paused as Calvin approached me, his smile beaming across his face. He looked smashing tonight in a simple black tuxedo, the only nod to the seventies being a sequined bowtie and pocket square.

  “Miss Althea, you do not disappoint.”

  “Thank you, Calvin. Have you seen Cash? I was just trying to find him.”

  “I haven’t, but I’ll let him know you are looking for him.”

  “Thank you. I’ll likely be hanging around the food tent. Tell him he can find me there,” I said, noticing Randall hovering in the corner, watching us. He smiled when he saw me looking and nodded at me. The smile didn’t reach his eyes. I wondered just how much he actually enjoyed putting on these galas, or if he just put up with it for his father.

  “I most certainly will. You have some fun tonight, Miss Althea. It’s bound to be some party.”

  “Sure looks that way,” I said and stepped away, stopping dead in my tracks a few feet later. Rafe had flown up into my face in a panic.

  “I know where the cave is. I found it. I found it, Althea. You have to come.”

  “Rafe, I can’t come right now,” I whispered out of the side of my mouth, continuing to walk forward so I didn’t look like the crazy person talking to herself.

  “No, it has to be now. The tide’s coming in. You have to come,” Rafe insisted.

  “Rafe, there’s no way I can go into a cave like this.”

  “Cash didn’t have a problem going in,” Rafe said, and I stopped dead in my tracks.

  “What did you say?”

  “Cash. He went to the cave. I’m not sure I can trust him yet, though. He might steal my treasure. You have to go. Now. The tide is rising.”

  I looked around, but couldn’t see any of my people. Dread began to fill my s
tomach. If Cash had gone into the cave, and hadn’t been seen since…

  Oh shit, I was going to have to go.

  “Take me,” I whispered to Rafe, “But it has to look subtle. Walk me the long way.”

  “Follow me,” Rafe called.

  I wandered past Calvin, who paused when he saw me headed away from the food tent.

  “Everything all right, Miss Althea?”

  “Yup, just stopping back at my villa. I have a bit of indigestion,” I said, rubbing my stomach. Calvin grimaced. There was one sure way to get rid of a man, I thought, and that was to talk about having to use the bathroom. Or period cramps. Interchange them as needed.

  Without another word, I followed Rafe toward the villa, my heart thumping in my chest as I began to worry about what Rafe had said. If Cash was still in the cave, and the tide was rising – it was only a matter of time.

  Picking up my pace, I hurried as fast as my dress would allow. To anyone looking, it would seem like I was making a beeline for my villa. I hoped that supported my indigestion story. Clambering up the steps, I ran inside the villa.

  “What are you doing in here? This way,” Rafe hissed.

  “I had to make it look like I was coming in here. Now, let’s go,” I said and sailed out the back door, around the pool, and crept down the side of the villa.

  “Smart,” Rafe admitted. “Now, hurry.”

  “I’m trying. Just remember I can’t fly like you can.”

  “Oh, right.”

  Chapter Thirty

  I followed Rafe the best I could in the dark, my thoughts all on Cash and whether he was in trouble. If he’d fallen and hit his head in the cave, he could drown the instant the water closed in. Running through a gazillion scenarios in my head, I picked up my pace.

  Rafe turned at the single palm tree, and I slowed, picking my way down the dirt path. Luckily, Luna had decided to go with a flat strappy sandal, so I wasn’t having as much trouble as if I’d been wearing heels. If only the moon were fuller, I’d have better light, I thought, then grunted as I stubbed my toe on a rock.

  “Here,” Rafe said, coming to a stop and nodding down into the dark hole that yawned before me in the ground.

  Now, did I want to go in there? Nope, I most certainly did not. I’d been there before, remember? Things slithered around in there. There was pirate writing on the wall that explicitly warned a person from entering.

  “Maybe I should go back and get Luna and Beau,” I said. Hindsight and all that. But still. I stared at the dark hole for a while, contemplating what to do, my breath coming in small hitches.

  “Cash?” I whispered, hoping he would respond if he heard me. Nothing. Granted, I’d barely whispered it. Leaning lower and cupping my hands around my mouth, I called louder this time. “Cash?”

  “Althea!” His voice echoed from far away, “Don’t come –”

  “Too late,” said a voice from behind me, and with one violent shove I was tossed like a ragdoll into the hole. I put my hands out to protect my face and then rolled into a ball as I banged my way down the embankment, coming to a stop at the rock wall where I’d found myself just the night before. “She’ll be joining you shortly, lover boy.” A light shined in my face, blinding me, but I knew the voice.

  “Randall.”

  “That’s right, Miss Psychic. Not so great, are you, if you couldn’t foretell this,” Randall said, clambering down the hill and wrenching me up, easily flipping me over onto my stomach in the dirt. Realizing he was about to harm me, or restrain me, adrenaline coursed through me. I kicked backwards, hoping to catch his balls, but only just grazing his thigh. A knee came down hard on my back, pressing my face into the dirt, and I whimpered as he cuffed my hands behind me. Once I was restrained, Randall eased off of me. Grabbing me by the cuffs, he pulled me up and shined the light into the cave.

  “Walk,” he ordered.

  “Why?” I asked, stubbornly staying put. Then I let out a yelp as he punched me in the back, doubling over and stumbling forward despite myself. I don’t know why it shocked me so much – maybe because I wasn’t used to being attacked, or perhaps because I didn’t expect it from someone impeccably dressed in a tuxedo. Either way, my lower back screamed in pain, and I blinked back the tears that threatened, doing my best to pay attention to my surroundings as the light flashed on the cavern.

  “Forward,” Randall ordered, and I went forward, not knowing what else to do, but desperately needing to see what condition Cash was in. The cave, a narrow tunnel in some parts, opened to various rooms and caverns as the path twisted and turned; it felt like we kept going deeper and deeper into the ground. At points there were small ladders to climb down to get to the next level, and for those Randall just dragged me over the edge, not caring if I fell or hurt myself. I felt my ankle go again, knowing that this time it was well and truly twisted, but kept limping along. I tried to memorize what turns we took. Stalactites hung from the ceiling, moisture dripping from them, and the occasional bat whizzed past us, startled by the light. By the time we’d reached the room that Cash was in, I was bloodied, limping, and mad as hell.

  “Cash,” I gasped as the light shone over him. His face was bruised and bloody, his arms manacled to the wall behind him, and he sat, half-submerged in water, his face mutinous. At least he was conscious, I thought.

  “Althea, no,” Cash said, his face distraught. He wrenched against the chains that held his wrists.

  “Don’t bother, lover boy. They aren’t going to budge.” Randall laughed and tossed me like a sack of potatoes, so that I landed half on Cash. I scrambled away from the water, my sandals slipping on the wet rock, and pushed myself back against the wall next to Cash.

  “I’m so sorry, Althea,” Cash whispered.

  “Why are you sorry? This isn’t your fault,” I said, nodding at Randall. “It’s his.”

  “Well, now, let’s not be so quick to cast blame.” Randall laughed, long and high, reminding me a little of the Joker in Batman, in his fancy suit and hair that now stood in odd little spikes and tufts around his head. “Although, I suppose it is kind of my fault. Okay, sure, I’ll take the blame. Why not? You won’t be around to say anything anyway.”

  “What are you doing?” I asked, watching as he pulled a square of pink from his bag and then began to fill it from a small scuba-like tank. My mouth dropped open as an inflatable flamingo blew up in his lap.

  “This, my love, is just some carbon monoxide. I’ll fill this beauty up and then stick a pin in it. Once I close off the entrance, it shouldn’t be long until you expire. As deaths go, I think you should thank me. It’s quite painless.”

  The two dead men. The deflated flamingo. It all made sense now.

  “The men in the car in Tequila Key. That was your work.”

  “Indeed. Those assholes were informants. They passed off my flamingo to a second buyer.”

  “I… I don’t understand. Is a flamingo statue really worth killing over?”

  Randall threw back his head and laughed, then looked over at me, shaking his head sadly.

  “She’s pretty, but not very bright, is she?” Randall’s face was all edges and craters in the light of the flashlight.

  “Sometimes her street smarts are lacking, but that’s because she likes to see the best in people.”

  “Well, my dear, let me tell you a little story then.” Randall settled back on his heels and I kept an eye on the canister he’d attached to the flamingo. If the nozzle came out and was still spraying, we’d all be dead pretty shortly. Even with the air flow in this cave, I didn’t want to play around with carbon monoxide.

  “The flamingo had drugs in it,” Cash guessed.

  Randall clapped his hands together, like a teacher delighted with his student.

  “Yes, yes indeed. A lot of drugs. A lot of very valuable and expensive drugs.”

  “Is that your thing then? You’re a druggie?” I asked.

  “No! No, I most certainly am not. The best drug dealers never sample their
own stock. No, I am a distributor. One of the best. It’s a great spot, this island. One of the last stops before we hit the States. A lot of planes fly through here.”

  “The plane. Last night.”

  “Right, exactly. The plane last night was unplanned; they were diverted because of a storm. I would normally never have one land with this many people around. But some things can’t be helped. For the most part, people were passed out or smart enough to mind their own business last night. Except you.”

  “You knew I was here last night.”

  “You weren’t exactly subtle in stumbling your way through the bush in your pajamas. I almost started laughing out loud when you finally realized you were in danger and tried to scuttle out of here. What were you even doing?”

  “A crab walk,” I said, a defensive note in my voice. I thought I’d been smooth.

  “A crab walk. Jesus. You should’ve just run. Ah, well, it can’t be helped.”

  “Why did you kill the men? And why the flamingo?”

  “Because they were delivering my very expensive cargo to the wrong people and taking the money for it. And I wanted to frame David.”

  I noticed he said ‘David,’ and not ‘my father.’ Inching closer to Cash, I leaned into him, trying to warm him with my body. I had no idea how many hours he’d sat down here in the damp and cold.

  “Why? He seems like a nice guy. He’s given you a good life. What’s the problem?” I asked, and watched the storm cross Randall’s face.

  “What’s the problem? He divorced my mother. Left her a laughingstock at the country club. She could never show her face there again. She was broken after him. And then all of a sudden he becomes the Flamingo King? Further embarrassing her? Us? The world looks at us like we’re one big joke.”

  “I don’t see that to be true. We all like your dad. He’s really nice,” I said, my voice soft as I watched the emotions whirl on Randall’s face.

  “Nice? Nice gets you nowhere. That whole story of him being lonely? Bullshit. He had his wife. Me. A respectable job. How could he be lonely?”