B.I.L.F.: A Brother In Law Romance

by Dark Angel

  I’m borrowing Carter’s Jag, in case he asks. Just move to the next page and pretend you didn’t see me leave, babe. Please. Their careers—my career—may very well depend on it.

  Carter

  The cameras flash as I walk into the crowded chamber. It’s the day of the Ethics Committee investigation as they weigh indicting me on corruption charges. But from the look and feel of things, you’d think it was the first day of the goddamn circus.

  I sit down at a table, as the lawmakers sit in a raised dais that forms a semi-circle facing me. The audience is behind me, with press kneeling across from me, underneath the legislators.

  You’ve seen this image a thousand times. Congressional hearings. Raise your right hand. Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God? Well, I do. And if people are listening to me as I tell them the truth they’ll see that there is no corruption here. Just thinking about the future—something we should all be doing.

  “Governor Andrews, thank you for coming down to see us today,” the Democratic Majority Leader begins. Of course he’s thanking me. The camera flashes are enough to blind you if you look at them too closely. This is more press coverage than he’s gotten all year. He's been keeping a low profile ever since those rumors of him and that underage Girl Scout came out on TMZ. Not that they were able to prove anything—the girl’s family all of a sudden moved to the Bahamas and seemed to have a large infusion of cash into their accounts. It boggles my mind that this man is in the same party as me. But what really gets me is that he’s sitting in judgment over me, determining if I’ve maybe had a lapse in judgment that I need to be investigated by him.

  “Thank you, Senator,” I say back. The New York State Legislature is broken down into a State Senate and State Assembly. It’s the Senate that does the investigating. The Assembly just does the rubber stamping whatever I tell them to do. Right. You don’t need to correct me. They used to rubber stamp whatever I told them to do. Back when I had approval ratings that were in the double digits—way higher than the 9% they’re at now after falling sharply the last two days.

  “Let’s go ahead and get started, shall we,” the Majority Leader says. “But before we do, I’d like to invite an outside counsel to also participate in the questioning considering that he has been so helpful in uncovering some of the more disturbing facts in this situation.”

  Okay. So that’s unusual. You don't usually see outside players come into an Ethics Committee investigation. Because you haven’t had a chance to properly vet them. You don't know what kind of bias and agenda they’re coming in with. Plus, there was no real notice. I didn’t get a chance to prepare.

  For lack of a better word, it’s a bit…unethical.

  Shows you the kind of damn snakes I’m dealing with here. But that’s okay. Because I’m Carter Andrews. I became Governor based on my sheer ability to get things done. No one, and nothing, can take me down.

  That's what I think. That’s what I know. And I still believe it even when the Mayor of New York City, and Editor-In-Chief of the New York Daily Journal walks in. There’s some hushed whispering.

  “The chair recognizes Michael Anders, Mayor of New York City. Due to his position as the head of the Anders Media empire, he serves as Editor-In-Chief of the New York Daily Journal and has uncovered a great deal of the pertinent facts in this investigation,” the Majority Leader says, as if reading from notes. He lifts his head to look at Michael. “Mr. Mayor, you have the floor to ask your questions.”

  Michael nods. I can’t believe the Majority Leader, as a Democrat, is okay with letting Michael Anders grill me. The Mayor doesn’t have a political party affiliation, but anyone who’s read the Daily Journal over the last two months realizes that there’s some sort of bias there behind the tone of the newspaper against me.

  Michael Anders clears his throat.

  “Governor Andrews,” he says into the microphone. “Can you please state your full name, your office and how long you have served in that office for the record?”

  I wonder what the Mayor is going to go for as I answer, “Carter Andrews, Governor of New York State for the last two years.”

  The Mayor nods from his raised seat on the dais.

  “And would you conclude that your signature achievement in the first two years of your office would be what you refer to as the New York State Clean Air and Water Act?” Michael asks.

  I nod, but then realize I need to answer. “I do,” I say. It’s true. You’ve heard me say it before. And I’m more than happy to say it again. The environmental legislation that I got through the State Legislature is going to save lives. It’s already saved lives.

  Michael nods and asks. “And Governor, were you in any way encouraged or prodded to push this legislation through at the expense of all others by any outside party?”

  What kind of a stupid question is that? I lean forward and simply say, “No.”

  As if expecting this, Michael retorts with a, “I find that very hard to believe, Governor, that you would sacrifice pushing through a transportation bill, a crime bill, and a jobs bill, just to push through environmental legislation.”

  “We still have two more years,” I respond back.

  “You plan to work on those initiatives, next? Really?” Michael asks, voicing incredulity.

  “Yes,” I answer back. I’m only going to answer questions here. When he gives me a chance to make my case, that’s when I’m going to verbally rip his goddamn throat out.

  “And that once you passed the environmental bill, you started attending fundraisers hosted by China First Bank; can you explain that as well?” Michael asks and I’m silent. I only went to it because I had to. I hate raising money. But it's a necessary evil. “Can you explain why up until passage of your environmental legislation you were never invited to a China First Bank fundraiser, but all of a sudden afterwards you found you had the time.”

  Dammit. This isn’t going to look good when I tell him the truth. “I was busy being Governor before, but once that priority was taken care of, I began to think about the next four years and the kind of fundraising I’d have to do.”

  “But you didn’t think of that before?” Michael asks. “You didn’t once ask for or receive an invitation to go to an event sponsored by China First Bank? You never thought to yourself that if you started fundraising as you call it, earlier, you’d have to raise less each day? All of a sudden these doors began to open up only once you passed the environmental bill, is that your story?

  I know what Michael Anders is trying to do here. I can see his strategy. He’s a snake.

  Everyone knows the billionaire mayor of New York City is looking to move up to becoming Governor one day. Everyone knows he’s got his eyes set on a prize even bigger than that.

  It all falls into place now. He’s trying to clear the way.

  Well, then he’s got another thing coming. It’s time to take my case directly to the people.

  “Governor Carter?” Michael asks, eyeing me with an evil smile. “Did you have an answer?”

  I take a sigh. This isn’t how I wanted to end up describing my actions. But you don’t always get a chance to pick and choose the time and place of the battle.

  “I think you’re a bit confused as to the nature of the environmental bill if you’re asking me that question,” I say bluntly. “And I think it displays a curious lack of awareness in government for you to ask me that.”

  There are some muted whispers that go through the room. I’ve just stood up to my interrogator. But I don’t stop. I need to keep going.

  “Imagine if you will turning on the water at your kitchen sink, and seeing thick brown sludge come out,” I speak into the microphone. I can see several of the photographers turn white at the thought. “Imagine getting tumors from eating tainted beef. Having your lifespan shortened by twenty years because you inhaled too much methane. That’s all we attempted to stop.”

  “Is that so. In that case can you…�
� Michael Anders tries to continue but I stop him. Hard.

  “Yes that is so, Mr. Mayor,” I say sharply, raising some eyebrows. “And if you stopped once to look at the people who live in this state—aside from the other wealthy Manhattanites you surround yourself with—you’d see that New Yorkers are getting sicker at a much higher rate than the rest of the nation. They’re also dying at an younger age.”

  “Are you trying to say I don't know the…” Michael is about to start again but I cut him off.

  “I’m trying to say, Mayor,” I say with a damn sneer. “That you don’t care about anyone other than yourself. You could care less about me, the environment, or even the jobs you think my bill is going to kill.”

  “You’re out of line, Governor!” Michael shouts. “And as someone who is standing here testifying in the hopes of avoiding a corruption and bribery scandal, you’re not doing yourself a bit of good.”

  I think back to the Mayor and everything surrounding him. How he only came out as gay six months ago, right before the New York City mayoral election. This man fooled a city of 8 million. It’s time for someone to show the world who he really is.

  “You want to know what I think?” Michael asks me aggressively. I don't get a chance to answer. But I bet you he’s going to tell me anyways. “I think you had a secret quid pro quo deal with the Chinese, Governor. Maybe not a deal—that implies intelligence. But they tugged at your heartstrings. Poor environment. Save the owl. Or something like that.”

  Jesus Christ. I’m sitting there, silent as he continues. “And then once you did what they told you to like a good little boy, they decided to start rewarding you.” There is angry grumbling all around me. People can’t believe this garbage, can they?

  “But, unfortunately Governor Andrews, this time you got your hand caught in the cookie jar. And now it's time to pay,” Michael declares.

  I got to admit. This man has played me very admirably. This is going to be a lot more of a knife-fight than I realized.

  That’s when I hear a voice behind me at the back of the chambers near the door.

  “Mr. Mayor, if you’re going to start accusing Governor Andrews of things, you better say it to my face too,” Liam says, as people begin to whisper and low murmurs start rippling through the hall. “That way I can see that smug look of yours on it before I bash it in with my fucking fists.”

  Yeah. This wasn’t how I had intended for today to go down, either.

  Liam

  “Mr. Mayor, if you’re going to start accusing Governor Andrews of things, you better say it to my face too,” I say out loud as I see people turn around to look at me. Of course they know who I am; my face has been on enough papers and televisions in the last two months that I’ll never be able to go to a strip club by myself again without getting photographed. “That way I can see that smug look of yours on it before I bash it in with my fucking fists.”

  That’s when the hearing bursts out in commotion. I’m guessing that they don’t get that many lawmakers fucking threatening each other in here too often. It’s too bad, really. Really does work well in getting all the fucking bullshit cleared up.

  I start walking toward the main witness table that Carter is sitting at.

  I told him when we first started preparing. I told him that just explaining his case wasn’t going to do it.

  We had to be prepared for a fight. And I’m sorry to say, but I was fucking right.

  I know you’re looking at me and wondering what the hell is going on. Why should I give any fucks what happens to Carter Andrews?

  You’re probably rolling your eyes. You’re going to chalk it up to saying that this is a plot point that could have been better developed. That the author was in too much of a fucking rush to get to the end and how did the transition fucking happen where I went from getting into fights with my fists with this guy who I’m standing next to defending him.

  Well, you’d be fucking wrong, first off. But that’s okay. We all make mistakes. Except yours fucking truly. But you wouldn’t care because if you and I were talking, we’ve already established that you would be wanting to fuck me. And yes, every time we do talk, I’m going to raise the fact that you want my fucking cock. I mean, it’s 12 inches of…

  “Mr. Jeffries, this is a closed session and you are severely out of line,” the fucking prick Mayor of New York City who is somehow leading this circus says out to me coldly. “You either need to sit down or leave, but I cannot have you disrupting these proceedings.”

  Don’t worry about him. I don’t give a flying fuck about Michael Anders. If you want to still talk about how thick and veiny my hard cock is, I’ll pull it out right here. I bet the press would love that.

  But no, you want to know why I’m even here defending this Carter fellow after we’ve locked horns so many times in the past, right? Jobs, Vivian, you name it.

  “Mr. Mayor, I don’t know what you’re doing up there questioning Carter,” I say out loud and in a clear voice so everyone can hear me. “But if you're really looking to probe for corruption, you need to hear what I have to say. Otherwise this isn't an inquiry. It’s a fucking lynching.”

  That gets everyone all excited and they begin to murmur all over again until the Chairman calls for order. He’s clearly not happy over what’s going on. But then again, he’s already fucking half-asleep. Probably dreaming about the day he gets out of this job and starts working giving paid speeches to people who are looking to curry favor in the government.

  “There can’t be anything you could say to defend this man, Mr. Jeffries,” Michael Anders says to me. You notice he doesn’t call me Mayor? Like he’s the only mayor in the fucking world. Just because he’s the leader of the greatest city on earth.

  “I want to speak on the record, and if you don’t think it’s relevant, then I’ll get the fuck out,” I reply back. I got to stay cool. Grace under fucking fire.

  There’s a moment while Michael Anders looks at me. He knows Carter and I love the same woman. He knows Carter has spent a fair amount of time with Vivian in New Kingston. But he also knows that at the beginning Carter and I hated each other.

  Oh, right. What changed is what you wanted to know, right?

  “Very well, you can speak, but if you make a mockery of this process, or if you continue to display contempt with your vulgar language, I will ask the Chairman to call for your removal,” Michael Anders says, pretending he’s being oh so gracious.

  Listen, why don’t you try to see what changed instead of me just telling you, okay? And if at the end, I get carted off to jail, or anything else, I’ll explain it to you.

  Because this shit is about to get real. Like right now.

  “If I know Carter, he gave you the example of turning on your water at your sink and seeing brown sludge come out,” I begin and Michael begins to nod. Carter is looking at me in a mixture of surprise, wariness, and curiosity. I bet a part of him thinks that despite all the sex we’ve had the last fucking month I’m still going to stick a knife in him or something.

  “But the fact of the matter is that when you don’t have a job, or a voice in your future, you don’t really care about that brown sludge, because that’s what you fucking feel like as a person,” I say and I can tell Carter now thinks I’m going to fucking back stab him. Michael is quiet.

  “I grew up in Andrews Estates,” I say and some people widen their eyes. They must not have known that about me. All they knew is this oil and gas tycoon that became the youngest mayor. They don’t know this side of me. “The government paid Carter’s father for it. Then they shoved some families in there. Then they forgot about them. Checked off some boxes and moved on. I know what it’s like to feel left behind. Not part of the fucking system.”

  The hearing room is quiet now. You could hear a pin drop.

  “You want to see a modern day equivalent of what Andrews Estates used to look like before it got torn down, come on down to Main Street in New Kingston and look at the shops that are closing. The pe
ople who wake up with nowhere to go. The kids who have both parents out of work. People with nothing to do,” I say.

  “As much as I agree with you, Mr. Mayor,” Michael Anders says to me, nodding now and using my title. “That’s what we’re investigating today. Did Governor Carter Andrews use an environmental bill to enrich himself from special interests and cast the people of New Kingston to the fires.”

  He’s talking to me like I'm a fucking baby. But I keep my cool.

  “So basically, in this instance, these people have only two choices, right? Because that’s what you’re framing it as. The Boltiador family factories, which will go against the environmental bill. That means they’ll be spewing out some pretty toxic shit. Poisoning the water. Salting the earth. Or economic starvation. Is that it?” I ask Michael directly. I know he’s not going to be able to answer. “When the only choices you give a group of people are to work and be poisoned, or not be poisoned and starve, you’re still not giving them any fucking options.”

  Everyone is looking at me like I’m a bit crazy now. I bet you’re scratching your head trying to follow along. But don’t worry. I said I’d come for a knife fight. And I fucking brought my knife.

  “So if you don’t think the Boltiador family factories are a good thing, what is it you want exactly?” Mayor Anders asks.

  “I want to not have to be placed in that choice for my people,” I answer. “I want these corruption hearings to focus on why and how huge groups of Americans have been left behind. To understand and fucking fix what led to this situation in the first place.”

  Now Carter begins to nod. I think he gets it.

  “I want you to ask yourself, Mayor Anders,” I say, getting ready to pull out my knife. “How many times did your paper, as it was discussing my sex life, spending time attacking Senator Hawthorne for her sex life, or Carter Andrews for his…how many times did your paper even ask why these jobs were so important to these people in my town that they were willing to risk poisoning their future for them? Why were the people calling out for change in the first place?”