Drive and Determination

by Louise, Kara

  “Elyssa, you need to drink some fluids. You don’t want to get dehydrated.”

  “Just leave me alone!”

  Will tried the knob to the door again, hoping it would open, but she kept it securely locked. “I’m not leaving until I know you’re feeling better.”

  He looked down at the knob and figured all it would take was some sort of screwdriver to open it from his side. Having no idea where to even look for one, he deemed it wiser that he not attempt that unless it was truly needed. Elyssa would be even more angry with him if he opened the door against her wishes.

  Telling Elyssa that he left crackers and drinks outside the door, Will returned to the living room.

  Will took a seat in the recliner and picked up a book. He didn’t often find the time for the luxury of reading and decided he would try now to begin the book he brought along.

  After reading through a couple chapters of the book, Will put it down as his hunger began to increasingly overtake his desire to read. He didn’t dare cook anything inside the house, being all too aware from experience that the scent of the food would not sit well with Elyssa considering the condition she was in. He called to her through the door to let her know he was running out to pick up something to eat.

  A moan let him know she had heard him. Stepping outside, he walked quickly down the street in the hopes of finding something close by.

  Elyssa listened for the sound of the door closing and slowly pulled herself up. She looked in the mirror and groaned. She looked terrible and she felt worse. Her body ached both inside and out. She had chills that caused her to shiver even though the day was quite warm. Her stomach was cramping and in the last few hours she had either been leaning over the porcelain throne, sitting on it, or curled next to it on the hard, cold floor. She knew there was not much she could do but let it run its course. However, she could do something about her comfort.

  She slowly opened the door, and as the next wave of nausea swept over her, she took a deep breath to push it down. Looking out at the small hall outside the bathroom, she saw what looked like a linen closet. She gingerly walked down the hall and opened it. Inside were some linens and she gratefully reached for a blanket and pillow, taking them back with her to the bathroom. Before locking herself inside again, she pulled in the food and drink that Will had left for her. She wasn’t sure she was ready for any of it yet, but when she was, she wanted it inside with her. She smiled weakly at Will’s thoughtfulness… and the fact that he hadn’t yet said, “I told you so!”

  Elyssa dropped the pillow on the floor and wrapped the blanket around her, warding off a new round of shivers. Then she curled up on the floor, feeling more miserable than she had in a very long time.

  Will found a small family run cafe a little over a block away and guiltily enjoyed a couple Guatemalan soft tacos. He ate quickly as he was anxious to return to the house. On the way back, he stopped at a small market and picked up a few items that might come in handy later.

  When he returned, he put the food away and then went straight to the hall and stood outside the bathroom door to inform Elyssa that he had returned. He noticed that she had taken the food and drink in with her. He was relieved. Hopefully she was able to keep something down.

  He tapped lightly on the door. “I’m back. Let me know if I can do anything for you.”

  He was answered with a long groan that admonished him to leave her alone. He stood outside the door silently wondering how long this would assail her body. He finally retreated back to the living room, picked up his book, and sat in the recliner chair, putting it in its most reclined position. He was here for the long haul -- whether she liked it or not!

  Will had barely read a few more pages of his book when he quickly lost interest. Thoughts of Elyssa crowded out any comprehension of the written words on the page. He went from feeling concern for her well being, to joy at just being able to be with her, to disappointment that he had pretty much lost any opportunity that day to spend time in her company, to the smallest hope that things had begun to change between them.

  He also had the anticipation of tomorrow, when Elyssa would surely begin to feel better. Although he was obliged to visit some of the coffee growers in the area, he trusted that Elyssa would wish to join him, although she still may not feel up to it. He didn’t have much time left. As he contemplated these things, he became very drowsy and soon drifted off to sleep.

  A very vivid dream beckoned him. He was not usually one to have dreams -- or at least remember them -- but in this dream, he saw Elyssa standing up in a boat on a lake. He was on shore and wondered how to get to her. She didn’t seem in danger; she was just frustratingly out of reach. He ran along a dock that stretched far into the lake, but the farther he ran, the further the boat seemed to be. She looked everywhere but at him. He contemplated jumping in and going after her, but something prevented him from doing so. He wasn’t sure if it was something sinister or was it just his own fear? He watched in dismay as the boat drifted away and faded from his sight.

  *~*~*

  Elyssa wasn’t sure how long she had been in the bathroom, but she knew it had been several hours. Her body still swung tumultuously between chills, aches, nausea, and now, unsurprisingly, a throbbing headache. Whenever she suffered any sort of stomach ailment, she frequently experienced a splitting headache. When she was younger, she had always trusted Janet to sit by her side and gently rub her throbbing head until she was able to fall asleep. She always thought Janet would make an excellent nurse because she cared so much for people and was so compassionate. Unfortunately, Janet could not stand the sight of blood and therefore never aspired to being one. Tears began to sting Elyssa’s eyes as she realized she would never have her sister’s tender care again.

  “Oh, Janet,” she whispered. “Why can’t you be here with me now?” Elyssa put her hand up to her forehead and rubbed it as she closed her eyes. “I know you would be able to help me feel better.”

  Once her silent tears had been shed, she slowly sat up. She waited to see if her stomach would rebel, but it didn’t. She felt weak and a little dizzy, but other than that, she felt she would be able to stand up after a few minutes. She waited until the dizziness passed and pulled herself up. She leaned over the sink and splashed water on her face.

  Elyssa took a washcloth from the towel bar, put it under the water, and cleaned around the sink and toilet. Then she sprayed some air freshener around the room. Just that little effort completely exhausted her, but she wanted the room to be clean if Will needed to come in here. She was sure at some point he would.

  Elyssa knew she may have to come back in here in a moment’s notice, but she was more than ready to remove herself from the bathroom. She needed to get out of this cold, confining room. All she wanted to do was to sleep, but she didn’t want to fall asleep here on the floor.

  Finally, garnering enough courage to lift her eyes to the mirror, she gasped at what she saw before her. Her hair was a tangle of snarls, her face was pale and her eyes were red. Her thoughts went to Will, who most likely was still out in the living room. Elyssa shook her head. If the way I have treated him since his arriving here didn’t cause him to run in the opposite direction, the sight of me right now certainly will!

  As she peered at her reflection, she wondered whether or not that mattered to her. Letting out a bemused huff, she decided she would tackle that issue when her mind was a little clearer.

  Elyssa picked up the blanket and pillow from the floor, hugging them both tightly against her stomach as another wave of nausea threatened to delay her escape. She stood very still, taking slow, deep breaths until it passed. She closed her eyes as her head began to throb again with an occasional sharp pain arcing across her temple. She steadied herself by bracing her hand on the sink and was tempted to simply collapse back on the floor, but decided to brave her body’s upheaval and move herself to the living room.

  Before leaving the bathroom, Elyssa took another look at her reflection in the mirror. In
disgust, she took the blanket and slung half of it over her head, so that it covered her like a hood. She wrapped the rest around her, keeping her pillow snug against her, and opened the door.

  It was quiet when she stepped out. She wondered whether Will had finally tired of sitting around doing nothing. Had he finally gone to the pension and checked in? She rolled her eyes as she thought to herself, Oh, I hope so!

  She quietly walked down the hall and at first didn’t see him. A sigh of relief almost escaped, but stopped abruptly when she noticed a pair of shoeless feet stretching out from the recliner that faced away from her. She walked up to him and peered out through her blanket. He was fast asleep.

  A weak smile touched Elyssa’s lips as she looked down at Will. He looked quite unlike a driven corporate executive. Her fuzzy mind tried to comprehend this man who had gone from being a hated ruthless executive… to being a thorn in her flesh… to something of an enigma to her.

  As she gazed down at him, one of his brows lifted and an eye slowly opened; then the other. He stared at her for a moment trying to make sense of this woman with a blanket covering her face, and then shook his head to rid it of its grogginess and imagery from the dream.

  “Well,” he said, as he straightened up in the chair. “Have you at last come back from the dead?”

  “Not quite,” Elyssa answered from underneath the blanket. “All I want to do is sleep and the bathroom floor has just become a little too uncomfortable.” She let out a breathy moan. “I feel lousy enough that I might not wake up for hours.”

  “Mmmm, it’s that bad, is it?” Will stood up from the chair. “Come, Elyssa, if you need sleep that much, I insist you sleep in the bed.”

  Despite Elyssa’s frail condition, she remained adamant. “No, the sofa will do.

  Will shook his head in exasperation as she turned and threw the pillow down on one end of the sofa.

  “Right now all I want to do is sleep and forget about the last five or six hours.” Keeping the blanket covering her face and wrapped about her, she collapsed onto the sofa.

  Will left the room and went into the bathroom where he picked up her stash of food and drink. Before taking it to her, he stopped by the kitchen and rummaged around for a big bucket. Unable to find one, he finally found a large cooking pot. Bringing them all back, he leaned down. “Have you tried eating or drinking anything? You really must.”

  She waved her hand. “I ate a cracker a little over and hour ago and sipped some 7Up before I came out.”

  “Well, it’s here for you in case you get hungry. I’ll leave it on the table. In addition,” here he paused and stroked his chin, looking for a delicate way to say it. “I’ll put this pot on the floor in case you can’t make it to the bathroom in time.”

  Elyssa groaned, “Oh, thanks. And I don’t want any more to eat.” Barely able to speak another word, she mumbled, “You might as well check into the pension now, I won’t be much company.”

  She turned away from him, covering herself completely with the blanket. Her head still ached, but the comfort of the sofa, although not quite long enough for her to completely stretch out upon, was much more preferable than the bathroom floor. She quickly found herself drifting away and although Will was saying something, it was completely lost to her.

  “You know I’ll not leave you like this, Elyssa. Don’t you know that by now?”

  Her breathing deepened and Will knew she had fallen asleep. It was close to six o’clock and he decided he would go into the kitchen and make a sandwich with some of the things he had purchased at the market.

  After eating, he returned to the living room and stood over Elyssa. She seemed to be getting restless on the small sofa. He watched as she squirmed and moaned causing the blanket to slip down off her feet. He reached down and picked it up, putting it back over her. When he tucked it in around her shoulders, he became alarmed when he noticed how warm she felt.

  He touched the back of his fingers to her forehead and realized she had a fever. When he went to remove his hand, however, he was taken by surprise when she suddenly grabbed it. “Elyssa, what is it?”

  “My head… it hurts so much.”

  “Is there something…”

  He was interrupted by Elyssa’s slurred words, “Janet, rub my head.”

  Will tensed and tried to pull his hand away, but Elyssa tightened her grip and held it in its place. He began to gently rub her forehead and she seemed to settle down, but he was now quite alarmed. She obviously was feverous and thought he was Janet. He shook his head as he wondered what to do. He didn’t know whether to try and shake her out of it or help make her as comfortable as she could be -- all the while Elyssa not truly realizing he was the one doing it!

  Will carefully lifted up her head and sat down, placing the pillow on his lap, and then lowered her head back down on top of it. When he removed his hand from her, she seemed to writhe and groan until he returned it to its place and stroked it again. He enjoyed looking down at her sleeping face as his fingers kneaded circles around her forehead. They occasionally strayed and nestled deeply into her mane of thick, dark hair, massaging her scalp. He felt more than a little guilty pleasure in his actions.

  As the evening wore on, he wondered whether Elyssa was actually getting any sleep, as anytime his hand stopped or he removed it, she seemed to notice it. He wasn’t sure whether she knew it was him and not Janet, but she hadn’t said anything since that last outburst.

  One thing he was sure of, though, was that she would be much more comfortable in a bed and would probably get a better night’s sleep there than she would on the sofa. He looked down the hall and tried to calculate whether she would be angrier at him for placing her in the Blakelys’ bed or awaking and finding herself asleep on his lap.

  He knew her stubbornness would rise up and challenge him for going against her wishes, but he knew it was for the best. He shook his head and ran his free hand through his hair. “You may not be happy about this, Elyssa,” he said softly, “but I’ve got to do it for your own good.” He chuckled. “Besides, I’m getting a little stiff sitting here and I need to get up!”

  Being very gentle so as not to awaken her, Will extricated Elyssa from his lap and laid her head back down on the sofa while he stood up and stretched his legs. He went to the window and looked out. There was a small view of the lake and he saw that the sun was setting. The deep colors from the sunset spilled across the sky and as he looked back at Elyssa’s sleeping form, he wished he could take her for a walk down to the lake’s edge. He was quite sure she would have enjoyed it. He knew he would have enjoyed just having her by his side.

  As if she knew he was watching, she dug her head deeply in her pillow and one of her legs dropped down the side of the sofa.

  “That does it,” he said softly. “You’re going into the other room.”

  Will went into the bedroom and pulled back the covers. “It’s not like Chad and Janet would be upset that you’re sleeping in their bed! I’m sure they’d want you to!”

  He walked back into the living room and Elyssa was moaning again. He decided it would be better for him to wait until she was in a deeper sleep so she wouldn’t wake up as he carried her in. He sat down in the chair and waited until she had settled down.

  Will drifted to sleep occasionally, waking whenever Elyssa let out a groan. Finally, at well past ten o’clock, Elyssa seemed to be back in a deep sleep and he went over to pick her up. He touched his fingers to her head again and breathed a sigh of relief that her temperature seemed to have gone down a little.

  Lifting her up in his arms, he carried her back into the bedroom. When he placed her on the bed and began to pull the blankets snugly up over her, she reached out for his hand again. “My head…”

  He sat on the edge of the bed next to her, leaning on his one arm while his hand went back to her forehead.

  “This is just great, Elyssa. All I need is for you to wake up and find yourself in Chad and Janet’s bed with me by your side! You’re
really intent on setting me up, aren’t you?”

  Each time he tried to remove his hand, Elyssa moaned or reached back for it. As the evening wore on, Will found himself more and more uncomfortable. Finally, he reached over for the other pillow that was on the bed and put it behind him. He was propped up at an awkward angle against the headboard, but at least he had some soft support behind him. He wouldn’t be here very long, anyway. He would wait until she was fast asleep and then he would quietly leave and go back into the living room and sleep.

  That was his very last thought.

  Chapter 14

  In the still of the night, Elyssa awoke just enough to try to adjust her sleeping position. Her mind was still foggy and she was barely able to even comprehend that something prevented her from freely stretching out and moving. She was finally able to squirm and turn onto her side against a solid form, maneuvering underneath something draped across her. In her dazed state she didn’t question this presence, but instead, felt safe and warm. A vaguely familiar pleasant scent coupled with a rhythmic beating and soft purring sound aided her in falling back into a deep slumber.

  Later that morning, Will slowly opened his eyes. It was dark except for a trickle of light coming into the room. His back and neck ached, and at first he wasn’t quite sure where he was. In a moment’s recollection, however, his eyes widened and he was shockingly alert!

  He had fallen asleep next to Elyssa on the bed. His body, rebelling against a most uncomfortable position, yearned to stretch out, while at the same time it reveled in her presence. Looking down at her, his heart began pounding mercilessly at the sight of her turned toward him; her head snuggled against his chest. His arm was draped across her and a yearning to enfold her within both his arms and pull her closer fought against a rational voice telling him he was playing with fire and the prospect of her wrath the longer he stayed.

  As much as he wanted to remain there and savor the moment, he deemed it more prudent to remove himself from this most compromising, but tantalizing, circumstance before she awakened. Even though she was under the covers and he was on top of them, if she were to wake now, she would in all probability accuse him of unsavory intentions. Not that the thought of being with her hadn’t crossed his mind. He found that her nearness and touch threw him into a tumultuous turmoil. Giving in to an irrational desire and throwing caution to the wind, he leaned over and softly kissed the top of her head before he carefully, and begrudgingly, disentangled himself from her side.