Dominance Never Dies (Masters and Mercenaries Book 11)

by Lexi Blake

  She walked calmly to the mirror and smoothed down her dress. “I think you’re wrong about the wound being healed. She might have found a way to live with it, but it won’t ever heal. She’ll die with that wound gaping and open because she loved him. It’s funny what can bring it all back, the loss and ache. Sometimes you think it’s fine and you’ve almost forgotten them and then I’ll smell banana bread or hear the sound of keys clacking and I’m six years old again.”

  “Are you talking about your parents?” He stepped up behind her, looking at her through the mirror. She’d begun her sentence as a universal, but it had ended personally. He knew she’d lost them at a young age, but not the hows and whys. He’d been too stubborn to learn more about the woman he couldn’t get out of his head.

  She nodded, a sheen of tears making her eyes bright. “I don’t remember them the way my brothers do, but I still feel it. It comes in flashes when I least expect it. I’ll hear a sound that reminds me of my mother and I’ll feel the loss. My father was a programmer. I can hear the sound of keys clacking in just the right way and I’ll see him in front of his computer, the green light from the screen on his face at night. He would look up and smile and stop what he was doing. I’ll smell the hot cocoa he would make me when I couldn’t sleep. The pain of loss like that never truly ends. It just hides and I don’t think it will do that in Erin’s case.”

  “It certainly won’t if we shove it in her face.”

  “It’s hers, Case. That’s the mistake you’re making. You think you’re being the white knight, saving the girl from pain, but you’re taking something from her. This is a part of their story. Whether you get Theo back or not, this is hers because he was hers. The pain is hers too. You’re taking her ability to pray for him, to know what he’s going through.”

  Frustration welled up, a nasty feeling he didn’t like. It made his tone harsher than he’d wanted. “I don’t want her to know and neither would Theo.”

  She took a deep breath. “All right. It’s your call, but I think it’s a mistake. I think she would want to know. I think she would want to feel everything she can where it comes to him, even the rough parts. If she’s not that woman, then you would know better than I do.”

  Was he keeping something precious from Erin? No. He was making the right decision, the one Theo would want him to make.

  Should Erin have a voice in that decision, too? They’d left her out of so much in an effort to protect her. He was Theo’s brother. It was his decision to make. His and Ian’s and Sean’s. If they got Theo back, it would be a gift to her. If they didn’t she never had to understand this fear. He was right. Mia was wrong.

  Still, when she turned and a sad smile curved her lips up slightly, he felt guilty for not giving her what she wanted.

  “I’m ready when you are.”

  He wasn’t ready at all, but she was right about one thing. She’d done the charity event thing more than once. This was her world. “Make sure Hutch doesn’t make a complete idiot of himself. He’s not exactly used to high society. He’s more used to microwaving his supper and playing MMORPGs.”

  She waved off the thought. “He’ll be fine. I’ve already written a nice-sized check to the organization. That will buy us an enormous amount of goodwill.”

  “I don’t know about that. What if they recognize your name?” He had to stop this bouncing around, looking for reasons to call off the op. His brother was in there. Guilt assailed him. He should do anything to get his brother back. Why was he waffling?

  Mia breezed on, luckily not picking up on his inner turmoil. “I’ve got a fund I do charitable work from. It’s the Iris and Ben Fund. I doubt they’ll connect it to 4L and the ticket was issued to Mia Danvers. My legal name comes in handy.”

  He’d wondered about that. “Do you miss it? Your name, I mean.”

  She sighed. “Sometimes. Don’t get me wrong. I love my moms. They’re awesome. They saved me from a lot of what my brothers went through, but I’m still a Lawless. I’m still my parents’ child.”

  “You could change it back.” He wasn’t sure why she hadn’t, except that she’d chosen to honor her adoptive parents.

  Of course, he rather thought Mia Taggart was a better name. He didn’t even flinch at that thought now. No waffling there. He wanted her. He would eventually marry her and tie her to him in every way he possibly could. She wasn’t the same woman he’d met. As long as she was honest with him, he would give her everything he had.

  “That wouldn’t fit into my brother’s plans,” she said cryptically.

  Before he could ask her what she meant by that, there was a knock on the door. It wasn’t the time for long explanations, but he needed to figure out what was going on with her family. Her brothers tended to be quiet around him, but he could tell something was bubbling under their seemingly placid surfaces. Then there were all the secretive meetings with Ian. There would be time later to find out what was going on. He opened the door and his crew strode in, Hutch first.

  “Do I really have to wear this thing? It’s scratchy.” Hutch tugged at his brand new tie. He’d gone out with Fain an hour before and picked up the elegant-looking suit.

  “I told you, yes. You have to wear it. And it’s not scratchy. It’s an excellent quality suit and we were lucky to find someone who could tailor it in such a short amount of time.” Fain frowned Case’s way. “He’s got problems with focus. He kept wandering away any time I took my eyes off him. Do you normally keep him on an actual leash?”

  Hutch groaned. “Looking at suits is boring. Those girls walking around in bikinis were not.” Hutch winked Case’s way. “This country is full of gorgeous women. We should think about spending a little more time here. It’s been a while for me.”

  He wasn’t hanging out because Hutch got horny. “We’re leaving as soon as we have enough intel to call Ian in.”

  Michael grimaced as he made his way to the lone chair in the room. “We’re leaving? I doubt that. Someone’s hanging out here and keeping an eye on that building. If Theo’s there, we can’t risk losing him. Even in the couple of days it would take to turn this op. They could decide to run again.”

  “All right. I should make myself plain.” He’d kind of wanted to avoid this particular conversation for as long as possible, but it looked like his time was up. “We’re doing this job tonight and then Mia and Michael and Fain are heading home. Hutch and I can keep tabs on the situation until Ian can get us backup.”

  The sad look on her face was gone, replaced with the warrior princess glare he’d come to know so well. “I’m not leaving. Are you planning on tying me up and shoving me on a plane?”

  “Only if I have to.” He was going to be resolute on this. He couldn’t work with her. His logic and decision-making got all fucked up the minute she walked in a room. If he had time, he would call in another female operative to do tonight’s job, but unfortunately the closest one he knew was a six-hour flight away. He hated to disappoint Mia, but he needed for her to be safe while he did his job. “I thank you sincerely for everything you’ve done and what you’ll do tonight, but I need to bring this down to my team.”

  “I’m on your team.” Michael stood up, his face as stormy and stubborn as Mia’s.

  Did he have to explain this again? “You’re also incapacitated.”

  “I’m fine,” Michael said tightly. “I’ve had worse and you know it. I can still move and I can certainly sit my ass in a chair and watch a building.”

  Michael wasn’t seeing the big picture. “I need someone who’s at full capacity. I’m sorry, but you’re out. Ian will bring in his own team in a couple of days. Hutch and I are going to do nothing but monitor the situation. Go home and get well, brother.”

  “I’m more than happy to go home.” Fain suddenly looked chipper, the only smile in a crowd of gloom. “I think you’re right. I need to escort my client back to Austin and get started on my new job. Ms. Danvers, I’ll contact the airport and make our flight arrangements. We need a n
ew pilot. I’ll try to ensure that this time the flight crew doesn’t attempt to kill us all. I’ll go and make a few calls while you all work out your issues.”

  “What new job?” Case hadn’t missed the smirk on Fain’s face.

  That smirk brightened again. “Didn’t I mention that I talked to Drew Lawless earlier today? He called me a few hours ago and we ironed out all the details. I’ve been hired as Mia’s full-time bodyguard.”

  Mia’s eyes rolled. “Awesome. No one asked me if I wanted a full-time guard. It’s good to know.”

  “You are not staying with her.” Case was going to be the one making those decisions when it came to Mia. He was going to make that clear to her brother as soon as possible. “When we get back tonight and I call Ian, I’ll have him assign her a guard.”

  “I’ve been ordered to take her back to Austin myself,” Fain said, his phone in his hand.

  “You can escort her home and then my brother will send another guard.” He would rather have her in Dallas, but he had no idea how long he would be stuck here. She would be more comfortable waiting for him at her own place. When he was done, they would sit down and have a long talk about her moving in with him.

  “Drew Lawless hired me,” Fain insisted. “I’m not giving up my job. He’s already got someone moving me out of my condo. He wants me to stay close to her.”

  “He can move you right back in because you’re not going to be her bodyguard.” He needed someone he trusted to watch over her.

  “If Drew Lawless comes to Dallas, can I meet him? Ian always takes Adam with him when he goes down to Austin. I haven’t met him yet,” Hutch said, seeming to not care that the air was thick with irritation on all sides.

  “Could Case and I have the room, please?” Mia asked, her voice tight. “We need to be at the party in twenty minutes, but I would like to have a brief word with our leader.”

  Well, at least she was going to yell at him in private.

  “I’ll drive,” Fain said. “I’ll drop Malone and Taggart off at the surveillance spot and then play chauffeur for our operatives. Come on, guys, let’s check and make sure we’ve got all the equipment we’ll need.”

  “Yes, the equipment I bought,” Mia said with a smile that came nowhere near her eyes. “And the hotel room I’m paying for.”

  She wasn’t happy with him. That was easy to see. “Sounds good, Fain. We’ll be there in a minute.”

  They stepped out and the door closed, leaving him alone with Mia.

  “I’m not leaving.”

  At least she wasn’t screaming. “Yes, you are. After tonight you will have done your job and there’s no place for you in the field.”

  “And if Tony finds out new information?”

  “I didn’t need his information.” He’d been happy to discover the address Santos had given her had been the same one he and Hutch had found only hours before. There was nothing her contact could give him that he couldn’t discover for himself.

  “And if he finds out who Theo hires to take them out of Colombia?”

  “You can talk to him on the phone or he can deal with me. After tonight, I’m calling in everyone I can. I’ll let Tennessee Smith deal with Santos. You’re out of this, Mia.”

  “Wow.” She flushed, her arms going protectively over her chest. “That didn’t take long.”

  “What didn’t take long?” He got that bad feeling in his gut. The one that told him he was about to get punched from a direction he hadn’t expected, but there was zero chance of him figuring it out and being able to deflect.

  “For you to get tired of me. A couple of fucks and you’re sending me away.” She turned and grabbed her purse, her every movement a testament to how pissed off she was. “Well, don’t expect me to follow your instructions. I’ll pack as quickly as I can and then you can drop Ezra and me off after we’re done with tonight’s job. I’ll do this particular job because if I don’t, it will fail, but I won’t let you ship me off because you’re done with me sexually.”

  That stopped him in his tracks. “What? I’m not done with you. Not even fucking close. How can you think that?”

  She shook her head, her blonde hair moving around her shoulders. “Because I’m no longer a sixteen-year-old girl. I learned a long time ago to judge men by their actions and not their words. You were honest with me when I broke in. You didn’t want to have anything to do with me. You let me go. How long did it take you to figure out I was your best bet at getting this op off the ground?”

  “Mia, I told you what happened.”

  “You told me what I wanted to hear. You told me what I needed to hear in order to let you on that plane with me.” She turned, obviously not willing to look at him anymore. She busied herself with adjusting her earrings. “I just wish you’d told me you’d changed your mind. I would have done all of this without the sexual games.”

  “First off, there were no games on my end of this.” He could feel his blood pressure starting to rise. Why was she pulling this crap right before an op?

  “Tony told me it would be this way. He told me you would choose your family. I’m nothing but a body in bed for you. I guess I’m a little more. You got some cash out of me and a nice ride where you needed to go.”

  Was she fucking kidding? “A nice ride? My best friend got shot and I almost watched you die. It was not a nice ride, Mia. And might I add that you’re the one who showed up at my place. You’re the one who set a trap for me, as you called it. All you had to do was call and give me the information, but you didn’t do this out of the kindness of your heart, did you? You wanted something out of me. You wanted me in your bed. Well, you got me. Don’t be surprised that I won’t dance to your every single tune.”

  It was just like her. She said she wanted a dominant man, but the minute he did something she didn’t like, he was crushing her soul.

  “You think I did all of this because I wanted to fuck you?” The question came out of her mouth on an incredulous huff.

  They didn’t have time for this. He didn’t know how to deal with it. “I have no idea what’s going through your head right now. But every word that comes out of your mouth proves that what I’m doing is right.”

  “Yes, I’m sure getting rid of the inconvenient woman you’re done screwing sounds like the perfect plan.”

  He stopped, staring at her, trying to figure out what was going through her head. She was angry with him, but beyond that it was obvious he’d hurt her. Getting mad wasn’t going to fix anything. He was acting as the leader of the group and he’d made the decision based on that, but she was still his girl. It was a balance he wasn’t sure he could handle, but he had to try for the moment. It was exactly why he had to send her back home. “I never once screwed you. I’ve played with you and made love to you, and now I’m going to send you away because you’re a distraction I can’t handle right now. I can’t work with you.”

  Because the thought of her getting hurt made him insane.

  “But you need to. You need to let me help you. I’m not incompetent. I know how to protect myself and I know how to handle a fight.” Her expression turned hopeful.

  He had to kill that hope in her eyes. He’d made the decision. He couldn’t allow himself to be swayed. This mission was too important. “You’re not a trained operative and you’re a distraction to me. I don’t have time to deal with you. I need you to go home, Mia. When all of this is done, I’ll come pick you up in Austin and we’ll figure out where we go from there.”

  “Which is exactly what you would say to get me to finish out this job.”

  He threw up his hands. “All I can do is tell you I want you in my life but not on this job. If you can’t accept that, I don’t know what else to say.”

  It took everything he had to remain calm and to not tell her he was crazy about her. If he opened that door, she would use it against him.

  “If you wanted me in your life, you would let me stay here and help you. Case, this is your life. This is what you do. This is
the most important mission you’ll ever have and I’ve got contacts that can help. I would understand if I couldn’t help, but I can. I have reporter friends who’ve done extensive stories on the cartels. If a cartel owns that building, I can figure out who and possibly get information from an inside man. I have a lot of people in this part of the world who owe me favors.”

  “No. You’re going home.” He wasn’t choosing his brother over her. He was choosing to keep her safe while he did what he had to do. And honestly, he needed a little time to figure out how to handle her. He wanted her, but he wasn’t sure he wanted this volcanic emotion he felt around her. Why couldn’t it be simple? Why couldn’t she see it was for the best?

  The very fact that she would fight with him like this when they had an op to run proved his point.

  “All right. I need a minute to fix my makeup and then I’ll be ready to go.” She turned and walked into the bathroom.

  What the hell had just happened? How did she go from arguing with him to politely telling him she needed a moment? Was she fucking with his head? Was this some kind of manipulation to get him to do what she wanted?

  He wasn’t going to be moved. This was what a leader did. He made the call and he stuck by it. Mia was going home and he’d just have to deal with her when he’d gotten Theo back. If she didn’t understand how important that was, then she wasn’t the woman he’d thought.

  Still, when she opened the door, for a moment he saw deep sadness etched on her face. Then she gave him a tight smile. “I’m ready. Let’s get this done.”

  She walked past him. It took everything he had not to chase after her and haul her back into his arms. He wanted to kiss that look off her face, to promise her everything would be fine.