Smooth Sailing

by Susan X Meagher

  “Of course not. You’ve got a half hour before Aaron will be here, and he’s always the first in—after you, of course.”

  “You’re the best, Wendy. Use my credit card to pay for this. And keep it coming,” she said, smiling as a very pleased-looking admin walked out of the office. “This will save me twenty minutes a day.” It was amazing and a little depressing to admit how much that meant.

  *

  Kaatje called just a few weeks after their meeting in Amsterdam. “Hey, I was thinking I needed a break. What’s LA like?”

  “Now?”

  “Yeah, now would be good.”

  “It’s fantastic! Really the best time of the year.”

  “Sounds pretty good. Do you want me to come?”

  “Yes! Yes, yes, yes, yes and more yes!”

  “Are you sure? I can’t really tell.” Kaatje’s soft chuckle made Laurie feel absolutely giddy.

  “You know how much I’d love to have you visit. But…can you afford the ticket?”

  “I can pay my own way,” she said briskly. “I’m not hinting for charity.”

  Damn, Kaatje had thin skin. “I know you’d never do that.” She tried to make her voice low and gentle. “But you’ve told me you try to live pretty simply and an extra trip to LA probably isn’t in your budget.”

  “It wasn’t, but I can get a ticket for under a thousand dollars, taxes included. I can manage it.”

  “I’m going to offer something, and I don’t want you to say ‘no’ until I finish. Okay?”

  “No.” Kaatje giggled, making Laurie smile at her playfulness.

  “I’ve been going to Japan five or six times a year for six years, and I only use my frequent flier miles to go to Cincinnati a couple of times a year. I have enough miles to go to Saturn. Let me use some of them to buy you a ticket. Then you can use your money to do things here in LA, when I’m at work. Which I will be most of the time. You know that, right?”

  “I do.”

  “Well? Will you let me use some miles before my airline goes out of business or merges with someone and I lose them all?”

  “Sure.”

  That was ridiculously easy! She had thin skin, but you never knew where it was thinnest. “How long can you stay?”

  “You know I don’t have much of a schedule. I’ve been farming out requests I’ve gotten for sails to other boats. I can keep doing that as long as I want.”

  “Damn that sounds nice,” Laurie sighed. “I can’t imagine having that kind of freedom.”

  “Maybe I can help you imagine it.”

  Nothing sounded more appealing. Having Kaatje in LA would make the next months bearable. “You know how busy I’ll be though, right? It’s really bad.”

  “Yeah, I think I’ve got a good idea. I’ll just have to make coming home something you won’t want to delay.”

  “If you’re here when I come home, I might let the whole project slide. It doesn’t matter if the damned park opens on time, right?” She felt giddy enough to make a joke about something that terrorized her almost every night. Having Kaatje beside her might even make the nightmares stop. That was asking for a lot, but it couldn’t hurt to hope. Funny how you could go from disapproval of your girlfriend’s work habits to joy at her decision to drop everything just weeks after visiting her in The Netherlands. Double standards came in very handy at times.

  *

  Kaatje arrived at eight the following Thursday night. As soon as she was through customs, she called Laurie’s cell phone. “Well, your immigration service believes I’m just here for a visit, and I’m finally walking on US soil.”

  “Fantastic! After you get your luggage you’ll see a guy holding up a sign with your last name on it. That’s your car.”

  “My car?”

  “Yeah. By the time you get to my place, I’ll be home.” She paused for a second. “You didn’t think I’d actually be at the airport, did you?”

  “Well, yeah, that’s what I thought.”

  “Oh, Kaatje, I’m sorry I didn’t make that clear. But nobody in LA actually goes to the airport. I would have had to leave here at five to get there.”

  There was a perceptible lag, then Kaatje said, “Okay. I’ll look for my car.”

  “He has my address, and I’ve already paid him and given him a tip. You just relax and let him bring you to me.”

  “All right. I’ll practice my kissing.”

  “Not on him!”

  “No, just on the back of my hand. See you soon.”

  *

  Laurie was standing in the doorway when the elevator door opened. Kaatje looked fantastic. Tired, but fantastic. Her dark hair was loose and curled softly around her shoulders. It looked darker and more lush than normal against a white cotton sweater that clung to her body like a hug. And her legs looked a mile long in snug jeans and navy blue boat shoes. She was truly a sight for sore eyes. “Get in here this minute.”

  Kaatje grinned and started jogging, reaching Laurie in two seconds, despite the big backpack thumping against her. “Good enough?”

  She wrapped her arms around her, feeling the solidity of her body like an anchor in a storm-tossed sea. “I’ve never had a better sensation than this. I can’t tell you how much I’ve missed you.”

  “Me too. Can we go inside? I’ve been practicing that kissing stuff and…”

  Giggling, Laurie pulled her inside and threw her arms around her neck. They kissed as though it had been ages since they’d seen each other. “I missed you so much.” Laurie rubbed her face against Kaatje’s shoulder, purposefully inhaling her scent and feeling lighter yet more grounded when she detected the familiar notes.

  “I’m glad I’m here.”

  “No gladder than I am.” She pulled away and looked down at the floor. “Is that all you brought?”

  Kaatje gazed down at her backpack. “That’s how I travel. I can manage with this for months. You don’t want to have much to carry when you’re staying at hostels.”

  A hostel was some sort of hotel, but why it had a different name must have something to do with Europe. Or something else.

  Kaatje’s eyes roamed around the apartment. “This is a very nice place.” Chuckling softly, she added, “It doesn’t look lived in. How long have you been here?”

  “A while. I’ll get around to personalizing it after Osaka. I hired someone to decorate it, but it’s not much like me.”

  “Show me around.” Kaatje took Laurie’s hand and started to walk, even though Laurie couldn’t imagine why she was interested in the place.

  “Well, we’re in the living room. I sit on the couch to work and it’s good for unscheduled naps.”

  “Does that mean when you pass out from exhaustion? I know you disapprove of scheduled naps.”

  “Something like that. But I also fall asleep there the second I turn the TV on.”

  Kaatje walked over to the set and appraised it. “Big and thin. Like a supermodel. You really don’t watch it?”

  “I haven’t turned it on this year. TV was Colin’s thing. He told me what to buy and he got it installed. Then he left.”

  “Do you have a picture of him?”

  Laurie blinked. “Of him?”

  “Or of the two of you. I’m interested.”

  It felt darned odd to be searching for a picture of her ex, but Kaatje seemed like she needed it to get acclimated. Going through a basket of photos, programs, invitations and flyers she was someday going to put into binders or throw out, Laurie pulled one out triumphantly. “Got one! This is from the time he had a short film make it to Sundance.” She handed the photo to Kaatje and watched her face as her focused gaze took it in. “That’s in Utah, in the mountains. It was colder than heck that year.” She and Colin were standing outside the theater where the movie was to be shown. His long dark hair was almost covered by a faux-fur trapper hat and they both had on layers of down and fleece. Their cheeks were tinted pink, and they both looked very happy.

  Kaatje finally handed the photo ba
ck, without commenting.

  “You look…something,” Laurie said. “I’m not sure what.”

  Standing there for a moment, Kaatje put her arm around Laurie and turned to gaze out the floor-to-ceiling windows. “You have a wonderful view.” They stood together looking out at the white lights that dotted the hillside. “What are we looking at?”

  “The line of moving lights is the Sepulveda Pass. It’s the road that cuts through the mountains between LA and The Valley.”

  “The dark part is a mountain?”

  “Yes, technically. But it’s not very tall. There must be a rule prohibiting people from building on it, because a hill like that would never stop a developer.”

  They moved over to the other window wall and looked out at the wide valley with tiny lights blanketing it.

  “Mmm. This is a big city. It seems like it goes on forever.”

  “And this is just a tiny portion. It’s not adorable and compact the way Amsterdam is.”

  “Being spread out has its charms. The density of Amsterdam can wear on you.”

  “I suppose.” She snuggled against her side. “Did it upset you to look at that picture?”

  Shrugging, Kaatje finally said, “A little. I’m not usually jealous, and I have no right to be anyway, but yeah, it bothered me.”

  Laurie turned, and looked into Kaatje’s face. “Tell me why.”

  Kaatje delayed by fussing with Laurie’s hair, tucking some strands behind her ear. “Uhm, I was thinking of how happy you looked. Then I thought of how you said you were just acting the whole time. It makes me wonder…”

  “If I’m acting with you,” she said softly. She gripped Kaatje’s shoulders and tried to make her voice clear and decisive. “Not ever. Not even once. I’m done with that. I will never put on an act with a lover again. It’s not fair to either of us. And I cared for Colin. I truly did. I honestly didn’t know that what I felt wasn’t love.”

  Kaatje nodded solemnly. “Okay. I just…I’m not sure of what’s…you know…going on with us.”

  “We’re moving forward, just like we talked about in Amsterdam. Aren’t we?”

  Still tenderly but idly fussing with strands of hair, Kaatje nodded again. “Yeah, I guess that’s what we’re doing.” She swallowed noticeably. “Are we…exclusive?”

  Startled, Laurie jerked a bit. “Yes! At least I am.” She put her hands on Kaatje’s shoulders and squeezed. “Did you meet someone?”

  Laughing gently, Kaatje shook her head. “Of course not. But I’m screwing around with my income pretty severely by turning away jobs. I don’t mind, but I want to make sure you’re considering the future.”

  Laurie threw her arms around her and squeezed until Kaatje winced from pain. “I think about the future every chance I get. If I didn’t think we could work this out I’d never, ever spend this much time with you.” She pulled away and showed a teasing smile. “I wish I were kidding, but I’m not. This has come at a really bad time for me, but I can’t walk away. I thought I could…” She shook her head, still smiling. “By the time I left St. Maarten, I was already trying to figure out how to get back to you.”

  “Okay. That’s all I need for now. I just don’t want to be chasing a dream that can’t come true.”

  “You’re not,” Laurie said firmly. “Neither of us is. Still want the tour?”

  “Yeah.” With Kaatje not budging an inch, Laurie took charge and tugged her along. “This sparkling clean room is the kitchen. I’ve used the plates and glasses…sparingly…but neither the oven nor the range has been touched.”

  “Until tomorrow. I’ll make you a good breakfast.”

  “No, no. I’ve got a breakfast meeting at seven. And you’re going to be in bed, getting over your jet lag.”

  “Then dinner. I’ll make something nice.”

  “You’ll have to go to the grocery store. My cupboards are bare.” She opened the door to a big cabinet next to the refrigerator, showing only a few bottles of liquor, wine, and salad dressing.

  “Give me directions.”

  She put her arms around Kaatje’s neck and grinned seductively. “Take me down the hall, open the bathroom door, remove this silly business suit I have on and get into the shower with me.” She gave her a fleeting kiss. “Good directions?”

  Kaatje took her hand and started to lead her. “Fantastic.”

  *

  The next day Laurie chose to wear a skirt with a pocket. She wanted to be able to keep her cell phone at hand, and knew she’d leave it behind, as she often did, if it was in her jacket. The phone vibrated at eleven, and it took her a second to figure out why her skirt was humming. She stepped out of a routine meeting to take the call. “Hi. What’s up?”

  “I finally am. How’s your day?”

  “Oh, you know. I can’t talk for long. Need anything?” Dear God, don’t need anything.

  “No. I just wanted to see how you were.”

  “I’m great. I’ll be home early. Don’t go to the store. We’re going down to see Teddy Bear tonight.”

  “Hurrah.”

  Kaatje needed to work on her false enthusiasm. That lame effort wouldn’t have fooled either Teddy or his cousin Brownie, and Brownie was a real dope.

  *

  Laurie threw the door open and bustled into the house just after four. “Kaatje? Are you ready?”

  “Yeah. I’ve never had my lover’s secretary call me to tell me what to wear to an amusement park, but I’m learning to roll with the punches.”

  “Wendy makes a lot of calls for me. I wanted to make sure you brought a sweater, and I knew I’d never have time to call.”

  “How’d you get off early?” She seemed a little wary.

  “Well, the good news is that I’m going to get to show you off tonight. We’re having a big dinner at the park. All of the big names will be there. Then…” How to break this to her? “We get to go someplace new and exciting next Wednesday.”

  Kaatje’s eyes narrowed. She was never going to be an easy one to fool. “Where’s that?”

  “Osaka.”

  “Osaka?” Her eyes narrowed dangerously. “Did you know about this before I decided to come here?”

  “No, I swear I didn’t. I thought I could put it off for a month, but a few big problems cropped up. I might be able to come home in a week…if everything goes well.” She put her arms around Kaatje’s waist and held her. “I’m sorry. I really am. But Japan’s very cool. I know you’ll like poking around.”

  “No, I don’t think I will. I’ll stay here and wait for you to come back.”

  Laurie’s enthusiasm collapsed along with her knees and she dropped onto a handy chair. “I can’t guarantee I’ll be back in a week.”

  Kaatje dropped down beside her and they shared unhappy looks. “I don’t want to go to Japan if you’ll be working the whole time.”

  “But I told you how busy I’d be. You said you understood.”

  “I do. But I understood that we’d be in Los Angeles.”

  Didn’t I tell her how volatile the schedule was? How could she have not known? “Uhm, I thought I told you I’d have to go to Osaka at least two or three times, and then for the month before we open. I just assumed…”

  Kaatje stood up and smoothed the creases in her slacks. “You said we had to leave the minute you got home. Can we talk about this in the car?”

  Laurie stood up and started for her bedroom. “I’ve gotta change. Business casual tonight.”

  *

  A few minutes later they were in the back seat of a big, grey sedan. “Do you own a car?” Kaatje asked quietly.

  Laughing, Laurie said, “Yeah. Well, they lease one for me. A nice Japanese one, of course. But I tend to order a car service if I have to go a long distance. I can work if someone’s driving me.”

  Kaatje blew a breath out of pursed lips. “I don’t think I really knew how hard you work. I thought it would be like my dad—really, really busy during the day…”

  “It was like that for the
first few years. But it’s ramped up every year since. These last six months have been torturous.” She leaned against Kaatje, desperately hoping it wasn’t all too much for her. “But it’ll be much, much better after the park opens. I promise that.”

  “But that’s not until June.”

  “Yeah. June the first. A day that will live in infamy or accolades.”

  “You go on to Japan. I’ll hang out here for a few days and see how I like LA.”

  “Really?”

  “Well, if we have a future, that might mean we live in LA…right?”

  Laurie’s eyes lit up. “You’d do that?”

  “I’d consider it.” She looked very serious and it was clear she was choosing her words carefully. “I’m willing to give a lot to make a relationship work. I just have to know…”

  “That I’m willing to give too.”

  “Something along those lines. Yes. I don’t like to be made a fool of. I’m careful with love, and I don’t mind going slowly, but things have to be fair.”

  “I understand. I really do.”

  “I’ll wait for a week. Then I’ll go to St. Maarten and scrounge up some business if you can’t come back.”

  “No, no, please don’t go. I promise you’ll have fun in Japan. We’ll have an extra week together if you come. Isn’t that worth something?” How quickly one could be made to grovel. She wanted to grab onto Kaatje’s leg and not let go no matter how much she kicked.

  Kaatje reached out with those strong, sure hands and cupped her face. Just that simple touch made her stomach stop churning. But the words were not calming. “I don’t want to see Japan alone. I want to see you.”

  “But you’ve come all this way!”

  “I know. But you can’t help what you have to do, and neither can I.”

  Yes, she could. Kaatje had nothing planned. She could easily go to Japan. She just didn’t want to. Unable to think of a response, Laurie put her head on Kaatje’s shoulder and nestled up against her, ignoring the slightly shocked look on their driver’s face reflected in the rear view mirror.