Bedded Bliss (Found in Oblivion Book 1)
Page 23
“And I came over as I usually do.” Lori smiled. “Rough night last night, huh?”
“Rough doesn’t even cover it.”
“Well, I’m taking Shelby and Axl to the park today. Get them away from the reporters.”
Chloe groaned. “No way.” She crossed to the window. Sure enough three vans were back. “How? Didn’t they say they were going to patrol?”
“I couldn’t tell you.” Lori squeezed her hand. “So, don’t worry about the kids today. I’m going to take them over to my sister’s to swim too.”
“You’re a blessing I don’t deserve, woman.”
Lori gave her a quick hug. “We stick together.”
“Yeah.” Chloe battled back the sting of tears. “I appreciate it.”
“Let me take you into work today.”
Chloe turned around. “Oh, Dad. You don’t need to do that. I know you have to work.”
He shrugged. “A few minutes won’t make a difference. And saves you a bus ride.”
And today, she’d take it. She was pretty sure if she got on the bus, it might lull her to sleep. With the extra time, she took the time to get Axl up and dressed for the day.
She sat him in the middle of his bed and pulled out his suit and water wings. He waved one at her with Dory showing. “Mama? Swim?”
“No, bud. I wish. Mama has to work.”
He sighed as he tried to pull on the swimmie. “Work sucks.”
Chloe winced. “We don’t say suck.”
“Sucks.” Frustration laced his voice when he couldn’t get it over his elbow.
She sat on the edge of his bed and pulled it off. “Later.”
“Now!” His face got red.
She cupped his face and covered it in kisses before he could break out in hysterics as only an almost two-year-old could. “Sorry, kiddo. You’re going to the park first. How are you supposed to ride on the swings with these on?”
He slapped his hands on his chubby knees. “Okay.” His voice was sad.
She smoothed his rumpled red curls out of his face. “How about you put these in your bag?” She caught him at the back of his shirt before he went face first off the bed. The kid was going to be the death of her.
The blue and white water wings went down with him. He picked them up off the floor. “Swim.”
“Swim!” She made her voice sound way more excited than she was. At least he’d be tired out this afternoon. And maybe she could get a nap in before they came home. Small favors. “Put them in the bag.”
He held them up and waddled to the bag, his face bright with smiles again.
He raced to the door and put the blue water wings into the big yellow beach bag, then returned for her. He tugged at her hand. “Go! Go, Mama.”
She laughed. “Okay, okay. Let’s go.” She swung him up onto her hip and the bag over her shoulder.
“Lori!” His screech as they went down the stairs cut through her brain like a laser. Her kid had a set of pipes on him for sure. He bowed out of her arms to get to Lori.
She was very lucky that Lori was so good with him, even if it made her chest hurt to see her son laugh and clutch at her friend’s neck. Chloe never felt like she could enjoy time with him. On her days off she was catching up on everything else.
Her dad cupped her shoulder. “They’ll be fine.”
“I know.” She patted his hand. “Mama’s gotta get to work.”
Axl waved a chubby hand in the air, his fingers backwards as he waved at himself. “Bye.”
Chloe went over to her son and kissed his fingers. “Bye, bud.” She grabbed her purse, rushed out the door, and down to her dad’s Toyota. Her dad came out a few minutes later.
“You okay?”
She unearthed a pair of sunglasses from her bag. “Just tired.”
“Are you going to let me in on some of this?” He sighed. “I know you’re very independent. And I try not to pry, but there’s a lot going on.”
“I know, Dad.”
“But married, Chloe? It’s so not like you.”
“I’m trying to figure everything out. His manager was working on a solution, but I haven’t heard from her.”
“And a solution involves you getting naked with this boy?”
Her cheeks heated. “I don’t know what’s going on between me and Michael. It’s not like he’s a complete stranger. I know him through Nicky.” Sort of. How was she supposed to explain any of this to her dad when she didn’t know how she felt about any of it?
Last night had been just as confusing. She shouldn’t have gone to the show, she shouldn’t have gotten caught up in his music and his stupid, perfect mouth that kissed her like she was his oxygen. She should be doing everything to get herself detangled.
Didn’t the clusterfuck of reporters last night prove that?
Or the chaos at his show? What if something had happened to her? Who would be here for Axl? She knew Nick would take care of her baby—knew it with a complete certainty that kept her from losing her mind some nights—but that didn’t mean she had to run headlong into stupid situations like she had lately.
She lifted her chin resolutely. She had to go to work, and she had to get herself back together for Axl. She couldn’t keep subjecting him to the insanity of Michael and the ever present paparazzi that swarmed him like he was dunked in the most delicious of bee pheromones.
You like those pheromones.
She wanted to snarl at that little voice. Mostly because it was so damn truthful. There was something about him that drew her close. His sultry voice? The effortless way he talked to her like she was the most precious thing on the planet? Or was it simply because he was paying attention to her?
No.
No, that definitely wasn’t it. She’d had men pay attention to her. Being a bartender put her in the crosshairs a lot. She could easily shoot down jerks at the bar. Michael was different in so many ways. His sweet talk didn’t sound forced, or like he’d used it a million times.
It scared her how much she liked it.
“Is there more to it?”
She turned to her dad. “I don’t know. He’s a musician for God’s sake. I don’t exactly have the best track record with them.”
“Is he like William?”
“No—not at all actually. Well, except for the partying.”
Her father pressed his lips together.
“Not like that, Dad. Michael isn’t into that stuff. I can’t gauge everything since most of the time we were in Vegas. And Vegas isn’t exactly soda and pretzels, you know?”
“I don’t expect you to be alone for the rest of your life. And neither should you. You’re still so young, Chloe. Being a mother doesn’t mean you aren’t interested in dating.”
She laughed. “Dating. How I wish it was just dating.” She rubbed her thumb along the ring in her pocket. “I can’t even explain what happened in Vegas. It’s just…” she trailed off.
Her dad patted her hand. “You know you don’t have to explain it to me.”
“I know.” She twisted her fingers around his for a second before letting them go. “And I’m not like that. Maybe because you and mom were so…” She didn’t want to bring up old wounds, but there was a reason she didn’t do a lot of heavy drinking. Axl was a huge reason of course, but even before she’d gotten pregnant she’d been more of the designated driver than the partier in her circle of friends.
Between her junkie mom and her dad being drunk most of the time, she didn’t chase the party scene like a lot of her friends had. One of the main reasons she’d ended up with Nick for a little while. They had bonded over their crappy parents. He didn’t expect her to get drunk to have a good time. He’d been more than happy to split a six pack of soda instead of beer.
“Your mom and I had our demons, but I was glad you didn’t inherit them.”
“But I did drink and then I somehow married this guy. I barely know him.”
“There’s obviously something going on between you two.”
She scrunched down in her seat, crossing her arms over her purse. “I know. That’s the part I don’t know what to do about. Who gets married before they get to know someone? Even drunk I’d never do something so crazy. But I don’t remember.”
He pulled into the parking lot at Rafferty’s, parked, and turned to her. “He didn’t drug you, right?”
“No. No, I’m sure he didn’t have anything to do with it, but I can’t be sure we didn’t get something at the party. It would explain so much because Michael doesn’t remember anything either. He might be a little more out of control with his friends. Hello, rockstar, but the blackout thing seems really suspicious for us both to have.”
“I wish you’d told me.”
“Come on, Dad.”
“I know. You’re embarrassed and pissed about it, but you still should have told me.”
“Oh, hey Dad, I went to Vegas with my friends and totally partied my face off then got married. Okay, thanks for watching my kid. I’m off to work now!” Her voice was shrill enough that she made herself take a breath. “God, this is so crazy.”
“Is it the wild weekend that’s crazy? Or the fact that you’re starting to like your husband?” Her dad scrubbed his hands over his face. “Now, I sound crazy.”
“Both,” she said miserably.
He laughed. “I know you loved William. Many times I had to ask myself why, but that’s not what I’m trying to get at right now. You can love more than one person in your lifetime. He’s gone. It’s okay to let yourself care about someone new.”
“But maybe Michael is even worse for me. I mean look at all that’s happened since I met him.”
“And it’s all bad?”
“Well, no.”
“Don’t be so fired up to end things. Take some time to figure it out.”
“It’s not just me that I’m worried about.”
“I know.” Her dad patted her arm. “And that’s why you’re such a good mom. You always put Axl first, but you’re a young woman in the prime of her life too. Not that your dad wants to think of that of course, but I’m not blind.”
No, unfortunately her father had gotten way too much information the other night. “I’ll think about it.” Not like she’d been able to do anything else except think about Michael lately. “Thanks for the ride into work.” She leaned over and kissed his cheek. “And the talk.”
“You’re welcome, Chloe Bear.”
She slid out of the car, shut the door, and waved. When he turned back onto the main drag she turned around and her heart sank. More vans. Why? Was there really so little in the news right now? She knew it was an election and they loved to push buttons for the senator thing, but wouldn’t it be Michael they’d really want to go after?
She lifted her chin and squared her shoulders. All she could do was get through this. Running away never solved anything. She smoothed her fingers over her high ponytail, then swiped her bangs into some semblance of order.
Questions came at her like bullets, but she was playing Supergirl to the hilt. She walked right through them, without even holding her hand up against the crush of people. Powering through the problem was the only way she’d survived the last three years. The last two reporters pushed in on her and she used her shoulders like Snake had taught her.
General admission shows could get quite competitive for spots near the band. And she liked being up front where the action was.
Of course Rafferty’s was no show. In fact, it was dim and dark compared to the blast of sunshine. It took her a second to get her eyes to adjust. She rushed through the room to the break room. The couch was gone, in its place was a lopsided loveseat that looked like it had been in a war with nineteen cats.
“Chloe?”
She turned to Lou’s voice. “I’ll be right up to prep the bar.”
“Can you come in my office?”
Chapter 21
She stared at her feet. “Look, Lou. I’m sorry about the reporters. It’s going to die down any time now.”
“I’d rather not talk about this in the break room, Chloe.”
Her chest tightened as she lifted her gaze to his. His eyes were looking at anything except her. The floor, over her shoulder, the new used couch—except her. “I’m the best goddamn worker you have.”
“Not if this nonsense is driving people away.”
Her eyebrows snapped together. “Our sales are up because of all of this crap.”
“No, I’ve had to give away a lot of damn beer because of this.” Lou put his hands on his hips. “I can’t deal with the distractions. My distributors can’t even get the truck around the back. No beer, no booze, no money—get me?”
Panic bloomed and threatened to choke her. She couldn’t lose her job. Not after all she’d sacrificed to keep her kid in diapers and food. She’d worked doubles and every shift someone wanted to give up.
She clenched her fists, and prayed that she’d hold back the tears. She’d beg for her job, but she wouldn’t cry. She wouldn’t use girl tears, dammit. “I’ll take a week off. They’ll die down.”
“Until next time? This isn’t the first time you’ve had trouble follow you around. You’re a good worker, but I can get another bartender in this town. Everyone knows how to mix a drink.”
The sting went bone deep. The unexpected ache that followed expelled all the anger and frustration she’d been stuffing down up and out like a geyser. Was she really so replaceable? She’d been with this place for years, and he was just going to toss her out like garbage?
The anger was so overwhelming she couldn’t hear anything over the blood roaring in her head. He muttered some sort of apology and handed her an envelope. All paid up. Don’t let the door slap you on the ass on your way out.
She walked stiffly to her locker and took everything out.
So very little. Some female items, a bit of makeup, a pack of gum. She reached to the back, but only found a receipt for a sandwich from a shop down the street.
Four years of her life down to things that could fit in a pencil case. She curled her fingers around the pink case with happy little cupcakes on it. The sprinkles blurred into a wash of pastel colors.
She dashed away the stray tear that had escaped and shoved the case into her purse. She lifted her head, then smoothed her ponytail. No big deal. Not like she hadn’t been fired before. Being a single mom included a lot of crap hours along with just as many call-ins for a sick or teething baby.
Chloe walked through the door and the overwhelming silence made her heart flutter like a trapped hummingbird again. Wanda had tears swimming in her eyes. Lou’s office door slammed shut a moment later.
Wanda rushed over to her. “Oh, honey. Are you all right?”
“I’ll be fine. I’ll find another job. I always do.”
“Can I do anything?”
“No, you’ve been amazing.” She forced her lips up into a smile. “Just keep everyone in line, okay?”
Wanda nodded as tears dripped down her cheeks and chin. Amber nibbled on her lower lip, but didn’t say anything. Jersey Janice had taken her place behind the bar. Evidently, Lou had already called in the reinforcements. So easily replaced—as he said.
She ran through the room to the door and out past the hoard of reporters. They chased her down the block and three enterprising camera guys even made it up the stairs to her bus. Chloe ran down the back and got off, waving at them with a double middle finger salute.
There was always another bus waiting. She took that one across town and into the heart of Venice. She needed to walk. She needed sand between her toes.
How many days had she wasted in Venice over the years? Endless summer days sitting on hot cement to watch Snake beat on an old white pail while Simon and Nick played guitar for a few bucks. Using her meager money to buy them water or a six pack on the good days.
Her first job had been on the Santa Monica Pier working at the amusement park. Her first time with Snake had been under that same pier at the end of her shift. He
’d spent months trying to convince her he was into her. That no other girl would do.
How simple things had been back then. It had taken her getting pregnant to actually say yes to one of the half dozen times that Snake had asked her to marry him.
She’d married Michael in mere seconds comparatively.
Honestly, she still couldn’t wrap her mind around that. She’d been walking a careful tightrope since she’d gotten the news about Snake. Since her life had changed drastically. Alone for the first time in too many years to count. Except not completely alone.
No, she’d had a baby in her belly and had been living from paycheck to paycheck ever since. And now she had no paycheck. Well, save for the two hundred and thirteen dollars in her pocket. She had the savings from Nick.
But that wasn’t her money. Never had been her money. She’d hadn’t touched it for anything other than emergencies for Axl. The special formula he’d had to drink for three months, the doctors appointments that hadn’t been covered under her medical program from the state, and a few other things over the years.
Most of it was in savings. Her kid wasn’t going to drop out of college like she had.
But she’d dip into it if she had to. She’d just have to find another job ASAP, that was all. She flipped off her ballet flats as she got closer to the skate park. It wasn’t exactly beach weather, but the sun was warm enough to get her toes in the sand.
Sifting sand evened her out in ways nothing else could. She was used to working with nothing and building a life. She’d just start over again. Not a huge deal.
If she told herself that enough maybe it would be true.
And Michael?
She wished that little voice would blow out to sea. She still didn’t know what to do about Michael. He pulled at her like the endless tide, but she also saw the breakers coming for her. And the storm clouds in the distance. The longer she let a man like him in her life, the less chance she had for normalcy.
Hadn’t she had enough of that with Snake?
Was it just a character flaw that she was attracted to men like that?
He’s not one-night stand material like Nick. And he’s sure the fuck not like Snake.