Motherducking Magic (Bad Magic Bounty Hunter Book 1)

by Michelle Fox

  "He's your friend?" Geo shook his head and sucked down the last of his wine. "Barkeep, another round." He winked at me. "I'm buying this time."

  "Aww you're sweet." Oh good. He was cool. This could work. I shoulder bumped him and rested my head against his arm where I made a show of inhaling his scent. "I'm no shifter, but you smell good."

  "New aftershave." A flush crept up his neck. Geo was kind of adorable.

  "I like it. What is it? Like sandalwood, juniper and a touch of citrus?" Witches worked with herbs and oils. I could dissect most perfumes given enough time.

  "I wonder what it would smell like on you?" He gave me a long look, and I had to fight back a smile. Geo was getting his flirt on. I was almost there.

  "So, Thorne, you know him?"

  "Yeah. He's trouble, Sylvie. A good girl like you should avoid him."

  "The thing is, it's too late. He's already gotten me in trouble, and I've got to help him to help me, you know? Do you know where he is?"

  Geo shook his head. "No. He hasn't come back to the Packlands for weeks. I heard he's in hiding."

  "Do you know where his den is?" If I couldn't get Thorne, I needed at least some hair.

  "I'll show you where mine is if you want." He waggled his eyebrows at me.

  "I'd like that." I gave him a shy smile, and he came in for a kiss. It wasn't bad for a shifter dork. Not too wet. Tasted pleasantly of wine mixed with his own scent and he didn't cross the line into tongue. Geo had some game.

  Pulling back he hopped off the bar stool and held out a hand. "Let's go."

  I took his hand and let him guide me toward the front of the bar. Just as we reached the door, Tex stepped in front of us, arms crossed, biceps bulging..

  "'Scuse me, Alpha." Geo moved to go around, but the man stepped to block us again.

  "You're not taking her to the Packlands." Tex's growl filled the air, displacing oxygen. The noise in the background dropped as people felt the power of the growl. This alpha was alpha with a capital A. He didn't have to be loud for his power to roar.

  Geo frowned. "Why not?"

  "You don't know who she is, do you?"

  "Sylvie."

  "She's the bounty hunter for Cleveland."

  Geo looked back at me, his brow furrowed. "What?"

  "And she's looking for one of ours. So you are not taking her into the Packlands."

  Irritated, I moved in front of Geo to face the alpha myself. "I have legal authority from the Triad. What do you think happens to you when I tell them you're obstructing an investigation?"

  Tex reached out and grabbed a big wad of my leather jacket. "I don't care." Lifting me up, he kicked open the swinging doors of the restaurant and threw me out. I sailed through the air and did my best to land on the parts of my body covered with leather.

  My landing was a firm bump but didn't hurt. Using the momentum of the fall, I rolled to my feet. "Your breath smells like road kill, by the way."

  Tex followed me out of the restaurant. Geo was close behind, along with a small group of looky-loos.

  "I should've known the only thing you're hungry for is trouble. Get out of here." Tex came straight at me, crowding me back and along the sidewalk toward the parking lot. I had no choice but to move. My hand hovered over my gun. I couldn't fight this crowd, but if they made a move, I would defend myself.

  In the parking lot, Blart barked as he caught sight of me from the hearse.

  "Is that a dog?" a woman asked, her nose wrinkling in distaste.

  "Sounds like a snack." The man who'd said that licked his lips.

  "Back off. That would be like eating your cousin." Shifters were pretty indiscriminate eaters, but there had to be a line somewhere. I glared at the alpha. "The Triad will hear about this. You'll have to answer to them." Raising my voice, I addressed the rest of them. "Sheridon Thorne is in trouble."

  "No. He's not." The alpha's lip curled in a snarl.

  "Yes. He is. If you help me find him, I will hook you up with almost any charm you want."

  The alpha whirled to face the shifters. "It'd better be an invisibility charm because I will rip anyone who talks to pieces."

  "You'll never know. I'll make sure of it. I'm at the big Victorian on Oak Street. Come find me, day or night." From there, I hustled to the hearse before things got any uglier than they already were. The alpha looked ready to rip me to pieces.

  Safe in the car and pushing Blart away, who wanted our reunion to involve a lot of sloppy wet tongue, I sped away from Alpha's Grill. It was almost midnight. I had maybe six hours until dawn and no leads on Thorne.

  Time to try something different.

  Chapter Seven

  A surprise waited for me at home. A petite lioness shifter stood in the middle of the driveway, my headlights framing her like a spotlight. She was an attractive woman, but small for a lion shifter with a distinct belly bump covered by a floral print summer dress. Her mane of blonde hair had been pulled into a ponytail and dark circles under her eyes spoke of stress or illness.

  I parked and hopped out of the hearse, Blart right behind me. I kept a tight grip on Blart's leash, countering his lunge for the petunias.

  "Hello? Can I help you?"

  "You said you'd give a charm to anyone who helped you find Thorne, right?" Her hand went to her belly.

  "Yes." I smiled and hope leaped in my heart. A lead was coming, I could smell it.

  I hadn't seen her at the bar, but the shifter grapevine was the faster than I'd realized. I unlocked the back door and dragged Blart inside—he was still trying to eat the flowers. "Why don't you come in?"

  I led her up to the attic, where I tossed Blart a chew stick to keep him busy and out of her crotch. Then I filled a glass of water for my guest and grabbed a beer for myself. The lioness perched in the chair across from my desk, her brow furrowed and her hands twisting the hem of her dress.

  "What's your name?" I set the glass of water in front of her and dug a new box of tissues out of my desk drawers. This wouldn't be the first or last time I dealt with distraught family members. I'd found basic comforts made them calmer and less likely to see me as the bad guy.

  "Tali." She looked at the water but didn't drink any. Blart took a break from his chew stick to slurp water in the background.

  "I'm Sylvie." I used the edge of my desk to pop open my beer.

  "I know."

  "You know Thorne?"

  She nodded and covered her baby bump with both hands, eyes shining with unshed tears. Uh-oh. My own, bumpless stomach sank.

  "Thorne's the father, isn't he?" I gestured to her belly.

  Tali hunched over her stomach protectively. "Yes."

  I sighed and sent a small prayer up to the Goddess for this woman. She was in a pickle of shit. Shifters frowned on mixing animals. My own experience at Alpha's Grill was still fresh.

  "I have no one to protect us if I can't find him. My alpha s-s-s-said..." She paused, struggling to collect herself. "He'll kill the baby when it's born."

  "So you need to find Thorne as much as I do."

  "Yes."

  "Any idea where he is?" Blart came over and tried to wipe his wet snout on my pants, I fended him off with both hands, but kept my focus on Tali.

  She shook her head. "I can't find him anywhere."

  The hope in my heart went poof. "Okay. When was the last time you saw him?"

  She lifted one shoulder. "Last week?"

  "And you can't find him?"

  She shook her head.

  I pinched the bridge of my nose again as my third eye screamed bad news. This lead sucked more than a starving vampire. I took a deep breath. "Okay. How about some DNA? I need some hair or something from Thorne. A hairbrush, a toothbrush, anything like that. Do you know where that might be?"

  She thought for a moment. "He's got that stuff at his lair, but I can't go into the Packlands right now."

  "Help me help you, Tali. You must know something."

  "He has a secret den. There might be somethi
ng there. No one knows about it except us. I can take you there. We planned to hide there with the baby."

  "Okay. Sounds like a plan. Let's go." I stood, partly to get away from Blart who really wanted to cover me in slobber made of love mixed with chew stick foam, and partly because it was field trip time. I motioned for Tali to do the same.

  She bit her lip, her arms still hugging her belly. "Do I have to go with you?"

  "Yeah. I think you do." Violating a shifter's den was a big taboo, especially for non shifter supers. I wasn't walking into a secret one without someone to talk Thorne down if we ran into him. He would already be on edge.

  "He knows about the baby, right?" I asked as I headed down the attic steps.

  She trailed behind me, hesitant, unsure, but backed into a corner. She couldn't leave without going through me."Yes."

  "And he's happy?"

  "Yes."

  "Good to know he cares." I could work with that. I held open the door at the side of the house and locked up once we were all out.

  Blart went into the back of the hearse, and Tali sat up front. I started the car, noting I had a half a tank. This night was hell on gas.

  "So where are we going?"

  "South. It's just past Medina."

  I shook my head. Thorne had me running in circles like Blart chasing his tail. Here, there, everywhere. I just hoped I didn't crash into anything. Blart could take out furniture when he really got going.

  "I have a question about the charm," she asked, her voice hesitant.

  "Yeah?"

  "If Thorne doesn't come back, can you make my baby safe?" Her hands went to her belly again.

  "Yeah. I can do something." I'd have to outsource it, and it would cost a fortune, but I'd do it. I wouldn't willingly leave her or her baby undefended. I wasn't worried about mixing.

  Shifters lost me when they started killing babies in the name of pure bloodlines. Hell, I'd come from good bloodlines and my magic had the oomph of a gassy gnat. In a different era, I might've faced the same fate as Thorne's baby.

  As far as I was concerned, love is love is none of anyone else's business. Let people have their happiness and worry about finding your own. It wasn't like the First Witch hadn't crossed any lines. Raising the dead? Mixing humans with beasts? And people were going to freak about intermarriage? Spare me the high horse.

  ***

  Tali's directions took me past all the Medina exits and into the middle of nowhere. It didn't even have a city name, just a network of pale gray roads edged with deep ditches and corn fields. She had me turn down a gravel drive into the middle of a field growing a short green plant—soybeans maybe, although I was no farmer—and park outside a thicket of trees.

  "Now what?" I asked. "There's no road."

  "We walk." She hopped out of the hearse, light on her feet for a pregnant woman.

  I followed her, keeping her in sight with a flashlight from the car. Blart took off on his own adventure. I had a fantasy that someday he would have my back, but that didn't seem likely to happen. I was lucky he came when I called. Mostly.

  Tali wended her way around the trees of the small forest, her steps sure and her back straight. After a few minutes, we encountered a thicket of bushes. She pushed through them with ease, but I got smacked in the face by thorn studded branches when I tried to do the same. Pulling my jacket collar up to cover my face and shoving my way through with my forearm so the leather took the brunt of it, I made my way to the other side.

  Lowering my arm, I found myself in a small clearing. In the middle stood a lopsided cabin made of a hodge-podge of materials. I waved the flashlight over the building, taking inventory. Pine logs and planed wood that also looked to be pine formed the walls. Moss ran along the edges of each layer, filling in any gaps. A blue tarp covered the roof, and a chimney made of small stones served as the zenith of the dwelling.

  "Sheridon? Are you here?" Tali's voice rang out in the night. She turned a slow circle. "It's me. I need you, Sheridon. Come back to me." When nothing but silence answered her, she dropped to her knees with a soft sob. "He's not here."

  "Is it okay if I go inside?" I asked.

  She nodded.

  The door wasn't locked...probably because it was made of old pallet wood that a five-year-old could kick in. Using the flashlight, I stepped inside and explored the cabin.

  "Come on DNA. Come to momma," I said under my breath.

  To my surprise, the inside of the cabin proved to be nicer than the outside. A new-ish couch and recliner sat to the left. A neat kitchenette to the right held a propane stove and fridge. There was a sink which suggested they had a water source. A wall and door made of pallet wood separated the living area from a bedroom, and a small bathroom had a composting toilet, sink and tiny shower.

  The bathroom was empty save for half a bottle of cheap shampoo. There weren't even towels. So much for a hairbrush or toothbrush.

  I moved on to the kitchen. At this point, I'd take backwash from a coffee cup, but all I found was a coffeemaker, some paper plates, and plastic utensils. Nothing looked touched enough to have DNA. I opened the fridge. Empty. The cabin was like a bad vacation rental.

  I checked the bedroom and finally felt a spark of hope. There were personal items and the room was obviously used, the covers a mess, the pillows indented by someone's head.

  I examined the bed, looking for a strand of hair I could use to make a new tracking spell. The bed was clean, though. I moved on to the nightstand which had a notebook, some pens, a flashlight, a calculator of all things. I couldn't use any of it.

  Biting my lip, I closed my eyes, trying to think where else I could look. What was Thorne's deal, anyway? He was about to be a father, but had stolen from the Witch Council, which wasn't something anyone did if they wanted to live a long life.

  He had to know it was dangerous. Why take the risk?

  I didn't have to come up with bail for people who crossed the witches (or vamps or shifters, for that matter) because they just disappeared as if they'd never existed. I only handled the crimes that crossed into the human world. Internally, supes dealt with transgressions on their own, and that justice was swift and without mercy.

  Turning in a circle in the room one more time, I sighed. Being in his lair should've been an easy button. I'd have to use more deductive investigative skills and hope they paid off. Unlike Lydia Pettie, I had a feeling it wouldn't be easy. Thorne's getaway was so clean, it felt professional.

  I picked up several of the books piled on the floor next to the nightstand and glanced through them. They all focused on supe history, and there were a couple from a historical fiction series about the First Witch. I'd read a few of those years ago. The author was a witch and historian who'd done a ton of research in order to write the series.

  That particular series had been scandalous when it first came out because she'd indulged in several conspiracy theories. The craziest one had been that the First Witch had more than one life and walked among us every century. She'd claimed that one reincarnation even came from an ancient Egyptian temple. I'd read them hoping to find some insight into my lack of magic, but gave up as each book went further and further down the crackpot theory path.

  There were papers tucked in one of the books that appeared to be Thorne's notes. He had terrible handwriting, but I made out the words First Witch several times and he'd scrawled a list of names.

  "Wait a minute." I looked closer at the list. These were all witches. Several on the Council and others were prominent community members.

  I took the list out to the living area. Tali had come inside and settled into the recliner, her arms clasped over her belly. I held up the papers. "Why was Thorne so interested in witches?"

  "You found the books."

  "Yeah. That's a lot of reading about witches for a shifter. Was he into history or something?"

  She shook her head. "No. The books showed up a few weeks ago. He was obsessed with reading them, but he never told me why."

&nbs
p; "What about this list? It's all witches." I held up the paper.

  She peered at the names and shrugged. "It wasn't something we talked about."

  I stuffed the list into my back pocket and sighed. My phone marked the time as two a.m. Thorne was still on the loose and dawn was coming whether or not I was ready. I needed a lead or a good chunk of DNA like yesterday.

  "Okay. Well, I'm done here. Where do you want me to drop you off?"

  "I'm staying."

  "All by yourself?"

  "It's safe here. No one knows about this place except you, me, and Thorne."

  A pang went through me. Her tiny size—barely up to my shoulder and thin as a stick despite her baby bump— made her seem defenseless, even though logically I knew she was probably stronger than me. "Are you going to be okay?"

  "Yeah. There's a bike I can take into town for food. Thorne will take care of us, too. Once he comes back." Her voice faded on that last part. "Do you think he's alive?"

  "Urmm. Maybe?" To say he was dead seemed cruel, and I didn't have the heart for it. "But if he's not careful, he might not stay that way. If you see him, tell him to call me. I'm probably the only one who won't kill him on sight at this point."

  Her eyes went wide. "What did he do?"

  "The original arrest was for scamming antiques." I hesitated, debating whether to tell her the next part. Figuring she should know so she could plan accordingly, I told her the rest. "But that's not all of it. Something's going on between him, the witches, and a vampire."

  "I should have asked him more about the books. If he'd told me what he was up to, I could have stopped him." She covered her face with her hands. "He's going to die."

  I didn't respond. Anything other than agreement with her assessment would be a lie. Thorne had dug himself into a hole deep enough to be his grave. I cleared my throat. "Let me know when you're ready for your charm." She didn't really deserve it, but I'd help her if I could. The baby hadn't asked for a jackass of a father.

  Sniffing, she nodded. "Yeah. Next week good for you?"

  "Sure. Any time. Just give me some advance notice." I left the cabin, and for once, Blart showed up ready to go. I opened the door for him to jump up into the passenger seat and then pushed the hearse as fast as I could to get me home.