Home for the Holidays
Page 24
Dahlia watched him move across the room. What she would’ve liked to do is yank him out of this barn and head back to his place for the evening, but they had an extravaganza to get ready for.
“Oh, Dally. It’s good to see you happy.” Rose wrapped her in a hug. “I know Jeff put you through a lot, and now it’s like you’re finally getting the happiness you’ve always deserved.”
“I am happy.” She squeezed Rose back before pulling away. She’d been careful not to bring up Gregory in front of anyone else, but she couldn’t help but wonder since she’d seen her sister’s interaction with him in the kitchen earlier. “What about you? Are you happy?”
Rose’s expression underwent an abrupt change. Instead of that shining smile, a sad frown pulled at her lips. “I was. Back in Savannah. Before I came here. Gregory and I were happy.”
“But now?” Dahlia couldn’t let this go. She’d been through a divorce, and she wouldn’t wish it on her worst enemy.
“I guess having some space has made me realize I don’t want that life. I don’t love him like I should. Like I would do anything to be with him.” Her sister sighed. “And I’m not sure what to do about it.”
“Have you talked to Gregory?” She led Rose to a table and they both sat.
“Not yet.” Her shoulders slumped. “It’s terrible timing. I’m not sure I can do it here. Maybe it’s best to wait.”
“Don’t wait too long.” She couldn’t let her little sister do what she’d done—put everything on hold for a man who would always love himself more than he could love anyone else. “Trust me on this, Rosie.” She caught a glimpse of Ike again, standing on a ladder, hanging those lights. “You have to choose wisely. It’s never a good idea to walk into a marriage with someone who won’t be able to adopt your dreams.”
Her sister nodded slowly. “Do you regret marrying Jeff?”
“No.” Maya and Ollie were the best things that had ever happened to her, and every second with Jeff had been worth what they’d made together. “But I didn’t marry him for the right reasons. I think I was more interested in security. In being able to plan out a future that would give me stability.” She couldn’t blame Jeff for not loving her deeply and passionately when she hadn’t loved him that way either. “We were both in it for the wrong reasons, and eventually that’s going to cause problems.”
“I don’t know how to break up with him. Oh my God, we have to call off the whole wedding.”
Dahlia could relate to the look of panic on her sister’s face. The wedding had already been planned, the save the date notices sent. “It’ll be better now than in ten years.” That much she could promise. Even with the rumors, the gossip, the questions, Rose could get out before too much damage was done. “I’m still a mess,” Dahlia confessed. “My heart is still a mess.” She didn’t know what the future held for her and Ike. Her family—her children—had a life in Minneapolis. And Ike’s life was here in his beloved mountains. But he’d told her last night not to stress about it, not even to think about it. He’d said they’d simply take things one day at a time and see where it brought them. There was so much freedom in that.
“I don’t know how to—”
The barn door swung open with a whoosh of wintry wind. Sassy appeared in haste. “Dahlia,” she called. “You have visitors.”
Before she could stand, her children ran into the barn.
“Mama!” Ollie hurled himself at her, landing himself in her lap, his arms around her neck.
Instant tears broke her vision. “What? Oh my babies.” She shifted him and opened her other arm for Maya, who wasn’t moving as fast, but was smiling from ear to ear.
“Surprise!” Her daughter hugged her too, though not with as much force as Ollie.
“What’re you doing here?” She struggled to stand up, unwilling to let go of them.
“We came to spend Christmas with you!” Maya pushed back and clapped her hands. “It was Dad’s idea! He has a special surprise for you.”
The announcement made her blood run colder. Dahlia let go of her children and watched for Jeff. “Where’s Jade?” Surely he wouldn’t bring his girlfriend to Dahlia’s family Christmas, would he?
“I don’t know where Jade is.” Jeff finally walked in, and she had to do a double take. Instead of his impish smile and polished appearance, the man looked weary and rumpled. “And I don’t care. This whole trip has made me realize I’ve only ever loved one woman.”
Dahlia stopped breathing. Everyone in the room had stopped moving. The awkward silence seemed to be sucking all of the oxygen out of the room.
He was not doing this. Not now. Not in front of Maya and Ollie. Not in front of Mags and Rose. And Ike. She snuck a look to the corner where he’d been standing only a few minutes ago, but he was gone. He must’ve walked out.
“Dahlia…” Jeff stepped forward. “I never stopped loving you. I was confused and selfish and stupid. I’m so sorry. I see everything clearly now.” He dropped to one knee and pulled a box out of his pocket.
No. No, no, no. Her heart folded in on itself, withering and crumbling. How could he do this? How could he make the kids hope?
“It’s a ring!” Maya squealed. “The prettiest ring you’ve ever seen in your entire life! We picked it out in France!”
“We’re going to get married again!” Ollie added. “And we’re moving to France for a year all together! Did you know there’s a Disneyland in Paris?”
Dahlia tried to swallow, but the anger choked her. Both Maya and Ollie stared at her with such exuberance, such hopeful anticipation that she froze. “France?” she choked out. What in the world were they talking about?
“The company asked me to work out of the Paris office for a year.” Jeff said it as though this should be the best surprise she’d ever gotten. “I didn’t want to say anything until it was a done deal, but my boss confirmed it while we were there. How about it, Dally? I know I have a lot of work to do to make up for what happened,” he said, still perched on that one damn knee. “But I’m committed to it. I’m committed to you. Let’s get married again. Let’s put our family back together.”
“Put the ring on! Put the ring on!” Maya chanted.
Ollie stole the box from his father’s hands and opened it so Dahlia could see. “We helped pick it out.” He was so proud. “It was the prettiest one in the whole store.”
She tried to smile at her son, but the sight of that diamond made her want to throw up. And France? Was he serious right now? She couldn’t smile. She couldn’t even breathe! How could Jeff do this?
“Wow!” Sassy floated over to them and pretended to admire the ring. “You kids did a great job. I’m your great-aunt Sassy, and I’m so happy you’re here because I have a ton of Christmas presents up at that house for you! I was going to send them home with your mom, but now that you’re here, you can come open them right now!” She put an arm around Maya and then an arm around Ollie. “Would you like that?”
“Yes!” They both yelled at the same time. “We love presents,” Ollie informed Sassy. “We love opening presents before the real Christmas Day!”
“Well, then. Let’s go up to the house and give your parents a moment.”
Dahlia silently thanked Sassy with a tearful gaze.
“Can I help you two open presents?” Rose begged in her fun-aunt way. “I might even have a few more in my suitcases for you.”
“Yay, Aunt Rose!” Maya attached herself to Rose’s side and everyone tromped out of the barn.
“I know you must be shocked,” Jeff said. He’d finally stood, thank God. “But I had this come-to-Jesus moment on the trip. Jade was yelling at Ollie. Can you believe that?”
She could, actually. “Jade is ten years younger than us! She doesn’t have children, but you knew that when you started having an affair with her!” She didn’t care that she was yelling. She’d earned the right to yell.
“I know, I know.” Her ex-husband shook his head and paced. “I just…I felt like I was losin
g myself. Getting older, and she made me feel different. Like I said, I was stupid. It was just some midlife crisis.” He spun back to Dahlia. “But that’s over now. I know what I want. What I’ve always wanted. We can start over someplace different. You’re going to love France. It’ll be a whole new adventure for us.” He took her hands in his and trapped her with a pleading look. “You’re the only woman I’ve ever loved.”
The desperation in his eyes refuted the declaration. What she saw wasn’t love. It wasn’t passion. It was panic.
Dahlia pulled her hands out of his and backed up to put some space between them. “It’s too late.” A month ago, she would’ve taken him back. She would’ve put aside all her doubts and put that ring on her finger so she could try to patch her family back together. But it wouldn’t be enough. Not for her. Not for Jeff. Not for Maya and Ollie. They all deserved more than a façade. “I don’t love you. And you don’t love me. Not the way a husband and a wife should love each other.”
“But we can.” Jeff shifted into his negotiator mode. “We can figure it out. I’ll do whatever you want. Counseling. A couple’s therapy group.”
“None of that will change the fact that you chose someone else.” She wouldn’t blame this whole thing on him. He had his reasons for betraying her, but she wanted to be chosen. She needed to be chosen. And not just when something else didn’t work out, either. Jeff didn’t want her as a wife, he only wanted her as a mother for his children. “I can’t go back, Jeff.” Resolve poured into her heart, making it stronger. “We can’t go back. We have to figure out how to move forward. Especially with you taking a job in France. We both need to be there for our kids.” She had no idea what that would look like, but she was not moving to a different country. Especially not now. Not after getting a glimpse of what she wanted. “Maybe I’ll move here.” She’d been too afraid to seriously consider it before but knowing Jeff’s living situation would change made it a possibility.
How could she not consider it? Sassy wanted to give them the inn. This place was a part of her past, a part of her dearest memories, and it could be a part of her future, too.
“But I have to move to France for a year,” Jeff said in disbelief. “I’ve already committed. And I can’t take the kids without you. I can’t.”
That wasn’t entirely accurate. He didn’t want to take the kids. But that was more than fine with her. It would make things much simpler. “Then you’ll go to France.” It would be a difficult transition for the kids all the way around, but she could get them through it. They’d come through a lot of difficult transitions this year, and they were stronger. A calm came over her. This would work. They would do their best to give the kids a sense of family, even if it wasn’t in the traditional sense of the word. “And the kids can FaceTime you every day. I can bring them to visit you there, and you can come visit them here. We’ll figure out how to make it work for all of us.” And she wouldn’t be tied to Minnesota anymore. She would be free to move Maya and Ollie here—to raise them at the inn with its magical forests and quaint ice-skating pond.
Jeff must’ve seen the conviction in her eyes because he didn’t argue. “I guess that’s best. I’ll be working sixty-hour weeks anyway. The kids need you. You’re a good mom, Dally.” He gave her a sad smile. “I’m sorry. I hope you know how sorry I am for hurting you.”
“I do now.” He was willing to marry her again just to make up for the terrible thing he’d done. But making another mistake wouldn’t blot out the first one.
“Maybe we should wait to tell the kids.” He obviously didn’t want to face Ollie and Maya any more than she did right now. “At least until after Christmas.”
It was tempting, but she couldn’t wait. It wouldn’t be fair to let them think there was a possibility they’d be a family again. “We have to tell them the truth. Now.” They had to be honest and hope it didn’t ruin Christmas.
“I guess you’re right.” He sighed. “You’re always right.”
“Well, I don’t know about that.” In this case, she hated being right. Dahlia led the way out the door, and they walked up the hill in a sullen silence.
“You should do the talking.” Jeff gestured for her to go inside first. No surprise there. He’d never been great with having the hard conversations.
“Feel free to chime in,” Dahlia whispered just before they walked into Sassy’s living room. Rose and Sassy sat with the kids on the couch, looking through the new books they must’ve opened. It appeared Eric and Mags were still out grabbing an early dinner.
“Mama!” Ollie flew off the couch, holding out a stack of books. “Look! More Magic Tree House to add to my collection!”
“Wow.” She glanced at the covers, not really seeing them.
“And I got this beautiful necklace.” Maya tossed her hair over her shoulder so she could show off the pendant.
“Beautiful,” Dahlia marveled.
“Oh my, would you look at the time.” Sassy popped off the couch, too, gesturing for Rose to follow. “We’d better get down to the barn. In less than an hour, this place’ll be packed.” She winked at Ollie. “You two are going to love the Christmas extravaganza. I’ll tell Colt to take you on a very special sleigh ride.”
“Yes!” Ollie started to put his coat back on, but Dahlia took it from him. “We’ll head down there in a few minutes. Dad and I need to talk to you two first.”
“Don’t worry,” Rose assured the kids. “We’ll save you the best seats in the house.”
After Sassy and Rose walked out, Maya eyed Dahlia warily. “You’re not wearing the ring. Why aren’t you wearing the ring?”
“Well, honey…” Dahlia directed both of the kids to the couch and she knelt in front of them. There was no easy way to tell them after the spectacle Jeff had made in the barn. “Your father and I decide it would be best if we didn’t get married again.”
“But we’ll still be a family,” Jeff added quickly. “That won’t change.”
“No, we won’t!” Maya leapt to her feet, her face reddening. “We can’t be a family without Dad living at our house! He’s moving to France! We’ll never see him!” She seemed to direct the brunt of her anger at Dahlia. “This is your fault! We came up with the perfect plan and the perfect Christmas present, and you ruined it all!”
Jeff moved in, gently turning their daughter’s face to his. “That’s not true, honey. I made mistakes.”
“But you always tell me to forgive people!” Maya started to sob. “You always tell me that being mad at someone will hurt me more than it hurts them!”
It wasn’t the first time her daughter had thrown her own words back in her face, and it likely wouldn’t be the last. Dahlia inhaled, feeling her daughter’s heartbreak as acutely as she felt her own. “That’s right. I do tell you to forgive people. And I’ve forgiven your dad. We both made mistakes and we’ve forgiven each other.” She was surprised to realize the words were true. “I’m not mad at him, but we can’t be married. We love you and Ollie very much. And both of us will always be there for your no matter what. We don’t have to be married to be your family.” She reached for Maya, but her daughter ripped away.
“I hate you! You’re ruining everything! This is the worst Christmas ever!” She bolted out of the room and ran up the steps. Somewhere a door slammed.
Jeff rubbed at his forehead. “I’ll go after her. Ollie and I will take her out for some hot chocolate to calm her down.” He pushed off the couch and trudged in the direction of the stairs, but Ollie snuggled in against Dahlia’s chest. That was the best feeling in the world, holding your baby against you. “You okay, buddy?” she asked, tousling his hair.
“I’m okay.” He turned his head to look up at her. “As long as you’re happy, I’m happy, Mama. You and Dad have done a pretty good job being parents. Even living at different houses.” He leaned in closer, and whispered, “I hated France anyway. It smells like stinky cheese.”
That made her smile. “What do you think about the inn?”
That answered her question. “Maybe vacation. Or maybe we could move here…” She said it like the idea had just occurred to her.
“Yes!” Ollie threw his arms around her neck. “That would be so much fun!”
“Well, you and Maya and I will all talk it through when she’s feeling better.” If her daughter ever forgave her. “Wherever your dad and I are, we’re going to try to be the best parents we can be. We’re not perfect, and we won’t do everything right, but I promise you honey…your dad and I will both love you with everything we have always and forever.”
Her son planted a kiss on her cheek. “I’ll love you always and forever, too, Mommy.”
“Thank you.” She wrapped him up in her arms, still unable to believe he belonged to her.
Footsteps rattled on the wooden steps, but Maya didn’t come into the living room to see her.
“Ollie,” Jeff called from the foyer. “Let’s go into town and get some hot chocolate before we come back for the big extravaganza.”
“Yes! Hot chocolate!” He squeezed Dahlia one more time before worming his way out of her arms. “We’ll be right back,” he promised.
Dahlia sent him off with a kiss. Ollie would be fine. Maya, on the other hand? Well, it might take her a little longer, but Dahlia would give her all the support she needed to get through the transition.
She listened to the front door open and close, to her precious children walking across the porch, and even though everything was a disaster, she was glad they’d come. She was glad they wouldn’t be thousands of miles away from her on Christmas.
Her eyes drifted to the clock on the stove. They had thirty minutes until everyone would start arriving for the extravaganza, which should give her plenty of time to take a detour to Ike’s cabin before she met Sassy and Rose at the barn.