Insomnia: What happens when you can't sleep

by Donnee Patrese

  “Are you alright?” she asked.

  I ignored her question. We sat in the airport without talking and when we boarded we sat next to each other not talking. She eventually fell asleep and rested her head on my shoulder. I of course could not sleep. I was thinking about the fact that I had just cheated on my husband with a woman. I had just confirmed my place in hell for killing two birds with one stone.

  What would my family think when I also had to get a divorce?

  For weeks after, my encounter with her played in my mind over and over again. My insomnia became worse. I would never sleep. I could not bear to dream. Whenever I closed my eyes all I could see was her pussy and my tongue pleasing her. It drove me insane.

  I eventually quit my job. I could not work there anymore. I felt I needed to make up for all the sins that I had committed and focus on my husband and my kids. My husband so was happy and said he knew that I would come around. He felt that my place was home with the kids and that we would be blessed for honoring God’s wishes.

  I wasn’t so sure how blessed I would be but it made me feel slightly better that I was making him happy. Maybe that would earn me some favor with God.

  Though at night I would still see her and want her. When I made love to my husband, I would imagine making love to her and then I would come hard. He thought he was just so magnificent in bed. I would never tell him that I was imagining fucking a woman.

  Eventually it became too much. I spent so much time in the bathroom and in the shower hiding my lust for her. I masturbated every free moment thinking of her and how good she tasted. I was dying to taste her again.

  One morning, I could not take it anymore. I knew the company had the day off for a government holiday but neither my husband nor the kids were off. I was at home alone and I intended to remedy that. I showered and dressed and made my way over to her house. I knew where she lived because I dropped her off at home once.

  When I reached her apartment I got up all the courage that I had and knocked on her door. She didn’t answer and I turned to leave thinking it was for the best. Maybe God was trying to stop me. Then halfway to my car I heard my name.

  I turned and saw her standing there. She motioned for me to come over and I turned and walked over to her.

  “What’s up?” She asked.

  I didn’t know how to say what I wanted to say. How do you say that you can’t get the taste of her pussy out of your head? That you wanted to make love to her even though you knew it was a sin.

  She smiled and grabbed my hand leading me into her apartment. When I entered there was another woman sitting on the couch. She was Hispanic and seemed to be a little older than Candice and I.

  “Cat, this is Erin, the woman I was telling you about.”

  The woman stood from the couch and walked over to me. She extended her hand.

  “I’m Catalina. It’s nice to meet you Erin.”

  I grabbed her hand and shook it. She didn’t let my hand go however. She led me over to the couch and motioned for me to have a seat. I sat down and each lady joined me on either side. They didn’t say a word. Candice began to kiss me on my neck and the other woman began to caress my breasts through my clothes.

  I wanted to protest at first. My old pain and fears were trying to push through the surface. I quickly dismissed it and just enjoyed the pleasure I was feeling. It seemed that my fantasy was about to come true and since I was going to hell anyway…

  Unfaithful

  My doubts and my fears keep me awake at night.

  My friends and family said I was crazy. When you fall in love, however you can’t just turn away. They told me she was too young and it was a bad idea to pursue anything with her. I had my own doubts at first but when she talked or walked I could not keep my eyes off of the beautiful, black, sexy woman that I had before me.

  My strict Muslim family were more against her being black and Baptist than the fact that she was so young.

  I saw it as good fortune at the time. Yes, she was quite a bit younger than me. I found her very mature for her age. She was smart, attractive and vivacious. She had an incredible body and her smile would melt my heart. I would do anything to give her whatever she wanted.

  The day I married her was the happiest time of my life. Watching her walk down that aisle was priceless. This was not the first time that I had been married before. I was married for 30 years prior to meeting her. My ex wife was a total bitch and I didn’t think that I would ever meet a woman that could make me happy and make me want to believe in love again.

  That is until I met Lexi. I believe it was love at first sight for me.

  I wanted to give her the world, so when I was offered this amazing promotion I jumped at the chance. It required that we move across the country, but I still thought it was worth it. I figured she would get use to it. I knew she didn’t want to move but at least it was someplace where my family lived and when I had to go on my business trips out of town she would not be alone.

  Yet, this promotion has caused a problem for me. When I am away from her I cannot sleep. I lie awake at night tossing and turning wondering what she is doing. Though age is not a problem for me, sometimes I feel like she wants something more. It bothers me. It keeps me awake.

  I stay away so much and travel so far, I am never home with my young and attractive wife. I lay awake at night in hotel after hotel afraid of what she was doing when I was not around. I wonder all the time if she is faithful to me. I get so worried that I have asked my son who lives nearby to stop by my house and keep an eye on her. I just want to know if there is anything to worry about.

  I call her all the time, taking a break from meetings just to see if she will answer her cell or if she will avoid me.

  It’s driving me insane.

  I lose sleep over this.

  I did not know what I would do if I found out she was cheating on me.

  Whenever I came home now, we rarely have sex. I have resorted to masturbating when she is asleep or hiding out in the bathroom. I would sneak to the basement trying to relieve my frustration. And it was…frustrating.

  After being up all night, I called during my lunch break this afternoon hoping to talk to her. After a few rings she answered.

  She sounded fresh and relaxed. I became nervous.

  “Hey baby, good morning.”

  “Good morning sweet heart. You sound happy and refreshed. I miss you.”

  “I sound refreshed? That’s crazy because I barely got any sleep last night.”

  I was wondering what kept her up at night. Was it another man?

  “What kept you up princess?”

  “I barely sleep when you are not here.” She said putting on her sad baby voice.

  Just hearing her voice and I started to melt again. I loved her so much and I felt like a heel with my doubts and suspicions. I just wanted to hold her in my arms and love her the way I use to in the beginning of our marriage.

  My mind drifted back to the first time I touched her amazing body. Her dark chocolate skin was warm and smooth. She opened her legs to me and I buried my face between them eager to taste her sweet pussy. And it was very sweet. I had never tasted pussy so satisfying.

  She moaned as I licked and tasted her. I could not get enough of her. I could not help but to succumb to the pleasure I felt when my hard cock entered her. She liked it hard and fast and I was always ready to please her.

  I couldn’t take it anymore. We were going to finish early tonight and I was supposed to stay and have dinner with the other employees tomorrow. I changed my flight and I am flying back late tonight.

  I needed to get back to my wife.

  I hung up with her telling her everything was right on schedule. I wanted to surprise her. I wanted to walk through the door, strip her naked and ravage her all night. Just the thought of it kept my cock hard all day.

  After my last meeting, I readied my things and waited for my taxi to arrive. My co-workers were a little miffed that I was leaving early, but
they had to understand what I was going home to. One of the most beautiful Nubian goddesses I had ever seen.

  When the taxi arrived, I loaded my bags into the trunk. I arrived at the airport on time and boarded my flight as scheduled. The entire flight I tried to sleep. It was going to take at a few hours before I got to her.

  No matter how hard I tried I just could not get any sleep. I just could not relax. I knew that I was not going to feel better until I had her in my arms and I was making love to her the way I wanted to love her.

  When I finally landed and was in the taxi in route to my house, I called her. The phone just rang and rang and she didn’t answer. It was fine. I was sure she was sleeping and I would just walk in and surprise her with kisses and a hard cock. I wanted to see the look on her face when she realized that I was home and ready to adore and love her.

  It was about 4:30 am when I entered the house. It was dark inside but I could hear the sounds of a TV playing in the back room of our condo.

  I put down my luggage and headed in the direction of the television. As I approached the hallway, I heard noises that sounded like moaning.

  It sounded like Lexi.

  That was the way she used to moan when I made love to her.

  I shook my head. My insecurities were rearing their ugly head again. I am sure it is just something on TV. I continued down the hall and stopped when I heard the noises again.

  This time I was sure the noises were coming from my wife and she was moaning loudly. I had a heavy weight in my chest and I found it hard to breathe. I made my way into the bedroom and realized that my worst nightmare had come true.

  On the bed was my beautiful young wife naked. Between her legs was the head of a man completely engulfed in her sweet pussy.

  For a moment I was completely shocked. I could not move. The emotions felt were paralyzing me. I just stared and watched.

  After a minute, my wife opened her eyes. Her eyes moved to the ceiling and then to the door. When she spotted me her large brown eyes became larger. She jumped up almost kneeing the man in the face. She looked as if she had seen a ghost.

  “Da'ud!”

  Her lover turned around and faced me. He still had her pussy juices on his lips. I looked at him and my heart sank.

  “My son!” I shouted at her.

  He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and stood. He had a look on his face that said to me he didn’t feel any guilt or any remorse. It looked as if I had just caught him eating dinner instead of eating his stepmother’s pussy.

  I started to scream at him in Arabic. My legs were no longer paralyzed and I lunged at him. Covered in a sheet Lexi jumped in the way trying to block the fight she knew would happen. She turned and looked at me.

  “Da’ud, I am so sorry.” She said trying to cover her nakedness with a sheet.

  I was so angry. All I could see was the pain and heartbreak she just caused me. I grabbed her arm and moved her out of the way. She fell to the ground and began to cry.

  Her tears had no affect on me.

  “You dirty nasty bitch. How could you?” I screamed at her.

  “You fucking filthy slut!”

  I lunged at her and was shocked when a hand grabbed my arm and spun me around. My son and I were standing face to face.

  “Don’t talk to her like that!”

  I reached up and grabbed him by the collar.

  “You disgrace yourself in my home and my wife and feel you have the right to continue to disrespect me?”

  He grabbed my hand and yanked it from his collar. He took a step back.

  “My goal was not to disrespect you dad.”

  I laughed.

  “Then what was your plan son?”

  He took a step forward.

  “You are never here and you told me to look out for her while you were away. You can’t take care of her the way that I can. I deserve to have her more than you.”

  I turned and looked at her still on the ground crying. I reached down and pulled her up by her hair. I removed the sheet from her body. She cried harder.

  “You rather be with my son?”

  She looked at him and then back at me.

  “Tell him Lexi. Tell him I am the one you want.” He pleaded with her.

  I still had her in my grasp.

  “What do you want Lexi?”

  She looked up at me with beautiful brown eyes.

  “I want you.” She answered in between sobs.

  Da’ub Jr. looked angry. The muscles on his face tensed up and he reached for her. I yanked her closer to me.

  “Lexi, tell him the truth,” he pleaded. “Tell him I’m the one you want.”

  She buried her face in my side. I grabbed her and threw her on the bed. She landed on her stomach. I looked at my son.

  “It seems she only wanted you for one thing.”

  He was pissed.

  “That is not true. You have intimidated her.”

  I laughed.

  “You want to see how a real man fucks her?”

  I undid the buckle of my belt and pulled it out of the loops. I walked over to the bed dropping my pants.

  “Bend over.” I said to her.

  “Dad, what the fuck are you doing?”

  He reached for me and I grabbed him by the collar and shoved him into the dresser. He slid to the floor groaning.

  Lexi obeyed bending over giving the right access to her pussy. She continued to cry but I didn’t care. She wanted to be fucked than I was going to give it to her.

  I pulled out my flaccid cock and stroked it with one hand and played with her pussy with the other. It was still semi-wet from the licking she had just received from my son.

  I instantly became hard and I shoved my hard cock inside of her. I began to fuck her through her tears. It wasn’t the way I wanted this night to end. However, she needed to know that she doesn’t need another man to fuck her. I can fuck her better and harder than any man can.

  She began to moan and grip the bed covers as I pounded her tight pussy. I wanted my son to see and hear that she was mine.

  I saw movement in my peripheral and turned my head. I saw my son coming at me with a lamp and I had no time to stop him before it crashed against my head.

  Deprivation

  Sleep deprivation can make you do crazy things.

  I should know.

  I have not slept in three days.

  I believe it was fear that kept me awake. I lay awake at night wondering when he would come for me. I wanted to be ready for him.

  So I didn’t sleep.

  Sleep deprivation can make you do crazy things.

  I know.

  It has been awhile since the last time I slept.

  I could not sleep afterwards. The memory alone has kept sleep so far away. I could still feel him touching me. His hands found my breasts caressing me there. His mouth covered my small breasts and his tongue teased my nipple.

  With any other man this would feel heavenly.

  But he wasn’t any other man.

  He was my oppressor. He spent all his time torturing me and taking whatever he wanted from me. Whatever he couldn’t do to his wife he did to me. The memory of our last encounter is scotched in my brain.

  My nude body was opened to him. He stalked the bed like a dog in heat. I felt like I had no choice. He forced his hard cock into my mouth and I gagged. He was large and he enjoyed shoving his cock down my throat.

  I sucked on the head and worked his shaft with my hand. He moaned and placed his hand on the back of my head.

  “Suck that fucking cock.”

  It’s a wonder why I couldn’t sleep.

  Sleep deprivation can make you do some crazy things.

  I should know.

  He forced my legs open and thrust his tongue into my pussy. I wasn’t wet. He stayed there licking me for a while licking and sucking on my clit. I just laid there staring at the ceiling. No matter how much he licked, I wasn’t getting wet. He became frustrated.

 
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” He screamed.

  There was no use. I didn’t want him anymore. It didn’t matter if I didn’t want him. He wanted me. That was more important. I tried to deny him once. I ended up battered and bruised cleaning blood from my body and the floor.

  There was no point anymore.

  No sleep can make you desperate.

  That is what I was…desperate.

  He wouldn’t let up. Tonight he wants to try something different.

  Sleep deprived and on all fours.

  It can make you do crazy things.

  I should know.

  I waited to see what he planned for me next. It didn’t take long for me to figure out. I felt lube drip down my ass. He intended to enter me. I braced myself as he inserts a finger into my ass. Then another and another. I winced.

  My virgin hole was being stretched. Before long he forced his long hard cock into my ass. I stayed quiet though I gripped the sheets in agony. It got better the longer he pounded my ass. He went at me for awhile. I begged in my mind for it to be over. He eventually came inside of me and collapsed on the bed from exhaustion.

  I made my way to the bathroom to clean up. I was sore and humiliated. I needed to stop him. I needed to stop him before there was none of my soul left. He has taken everything from me. When I returned he was fast asleep.

  I lay in bed next to him, unable to sleep and unable to get his smell and his touch off me. I looked over at him and watched him. I couldn’t take him anymore. I eased out of the bed hoping not to wake him. I get to the closet without making a sound.

  I knew where he kept it. I grab the box and remove his gun. I wasn’t thinking straight.

  I walked back over to the bed and stared at his sleeping body. I aimed the gun.

  Sleep deprivation makes you do crazy things.

  I should know.

  I killed a man…

  New Year’s Eve

  I always found it hard to sleep when I was in the mood. The throbbing in my clit kept me wide awake. Good thing it was New Year’s Eve and the party was in full swing.