Toni L.P. Kelner - Laura Fleming 07 - Mad as the Dickens

by Toni L. P. Kelner

  Richard met Aunt Maggie and me at the door, smiling widely.

  “You knew about the shower, didn’t you?” I said accusingly.

  “Of course,” he said as we started unloading the car. “But that’s not why I’m so happy. Have you heard the good news?”

  “That the play’s back on?” I asked. “Vasti couldn’t wait to tell us. But what are you going to do about Scrooge?”

  “I’m not sure,” he admitted. “Vasti seems to think it will work out.”

  “Vasti assumes things will work out because she can’t imagine the world spinning in any direction other than hers.”

  “Generally speaking, she’s right.”

  I had to admit that he had a point.

  Once everything was inside, naturally I had to show it all off to him. He admired everything, but then he said, “Laura, do we need all this stuff for one little baby?”

  “Are you kidding? There’s more stuff being shipped up North, and Vasti said this isn’t nearly as much as she got at her baby shower.”

  “How kind of her to point it out,” Richard said. “Are we going to fit it into the new place?”

  “We’ll manage. By the way, I’ve got some other news for you.” I explained how Junior and I had decided to tackle Seth’s murder.

  “I must admit that I assumed you’d be going after Seth’s killer sooner or later,” he said when I was finished.

  “Why does everybody think I’m dying to go after every killer that comes around?”

  “Why won’t you admit that you like it?” Richard countered. “You don’t even admit it to me.”

  “I don’t like …” In all honesty, I had to stop. “Okay, maybe I do like it. At least, I get some sort of satisfaction out of it. That’s weird, isn’t it?”

  “No more so than for cops and private eyes to get satisfaction out of their work.”

  “They get paid for it.”

  “Lots of people enjoy things they don’t get paid for. My directing this play is a case in point.”

  “I guess.” For a minute I wondered why I liked chasing killers so much, and then I wondered why liking it bothered me.

  Richard said, “Anyway, I’m glad you’re not going at it alone.”

  “Why’s that?” I said, tensing. If Richard said one word about my not being able to handle it while I was pregnant, I was going to have a mood swing that would turn his hair white.

  “Because with the play back on, I’m not going to be able to do research or run around and question people with you.”

  “Don’t you think I could work alone?”

  “You probably could, but I wouldn’t be able to concentrate on the play if you were.” Before I could take offense, he added, “No more than you could concentrate if I were working without backup.”

  “True enough.”

  “And if the killer is in the cast or crew, I want a competent set of eyes keeping watch. Having two competent sets of eyes is even better.”

  As usual, he’d given exactly the right answers. If having an undiscovered killer in Byerly worried me, having one locked in a recreation center with my husband and various members of my family made me downright nervous. “That’s me, the defender of the innocent,” I said more lightly than I felt.

  “I don’t know that I’m exactly innocent,” he said, putting his hand on my tummy, “but Laura, you can defend me anytime.”

  We cuddled for a few minutes after that. It’s more awkward to cuddle when you’re five months pregnant, but just as much fun.

  Richard said, “You and Junior working together … Oh, to be a fly on the wall.”

  “Why do you say that?” I said. “I think we’ll be a good team.”

  “If you don’t kill each other.”

  “We’re not the ones who’ve been throwing tantrums.”

  “Touché. But you two are strong-willed women.”

  “Since when are strong-willed women a problem?”

  “When both of them are trying to be in charge. I can’t picture Junior blithely following your lead, and I’m sure you won’t follow anybody’s but your own.”

  “I’m not sure how it’s going to work either,” I said. “I just wanted to make sure you weren’t going to make any jokes about cat fights or hormones.”

  “What kind of sexist pig do you think I am?”

  “No kind at all,” I said, “or I’d never have let you knock me up.”

  “That’s better,” he said, mollified.

  We cuddled a while longer, but when I caught Richard peeking at the wall clock, I realized that it was nearly time to head to rehearsal. We both had work to do.

  Chapter 10

  It was a subdued crowd that night at the recreation center, and I saw more than one person sneaking glances at the door to the hallway where Seth had been killed. Still, it looked as if Vasti really had convinced everybody to come back. Admittedly, everybody jumped every time there was a loud noise, but they were there.

  I’d expected Junior’s nieces and nephews to be nervous, but they seemed fine. I didn’t know if it was because death didn’t mean as much to them at their age, or if having a deputy, a police chief, and several former police chiefs in the family had given them a different viewpoint. Instead, it was Sarah Gamp who showed the most strain, but then again, she’d been the one to find Seth’s body. I thought it was awfully brave of her to come back at all.

  Unless … Hadn’t I read that the person to find a body is frequently involved? I tried to remember how long Mrs. Gamp had been gone when she went looking for Seth. Surely she’d had enough time to bludgeon him to death, and it wouldn’t have taken her but a minute to hide the weapon. Then all she would have had to do is scream for help and pretend to be upset. Heck, she would probably have been upset if she’d just killed a man.

  I didn’t know why she would have wanted to kill Seth, but then again, I didn’t know why anybody would have wanted to. Somebody had, so why not Mrs. Gamp? That’s when I noticed Junior standing by my chair.

  “Checking out the field?” she said as she sat down next to me.

  “Just speculating,” I said, a little embarrassed for suspecting a little old lady.

  Richard hopped up onto the stage, and once everybody quieted down, he said, “The show must go on. We’ve all heard that. The show must go on.” He paused, making eye contact with various people. “The fact is, the show doesn’t have to go on. As much as I love the theater, there are countless good reasons to cancel a performance. The loss we’ve had is as strong a reason as I’ve ever known.” He nodded at the Murdstones. “Yet every one of you has decided to get past that loss, to come back in here to do the job you promised to do. For that I applaud you.” He actually clapped, and when he said, “Now applaud yourselves,” darned if we didn’t join in, even the Murdstones. As the sound started to dwindle, he said, “I hope you all get used to that sound, because that’s what you’re going to be hearing on opening night.”

  “This is almost as much fun as one of his tantrums,” Junior whispered, but I shushed her. I’d sat in on enough of Richard’s lectures to know he was a good teacher, and I’d seen him on stage so I knew he was a decent actor, but this was the first time I realized that he would have made a dandy preacher.

  Then David Murdstone stood up. “Richard, may I say something?”

  “Of course.”

  David turned to face the room. “I know some of you are surprised that Jake, Florence, and I are here tonight. Quite frankly, it was very difficult to come back. But this is what Dad would have wanted. He loved his grandson Barnaby, as did we all, and honoring him this way was extremely important to him. So for Dad’s sake, and for Barnaby’s, we decided to go on. In their names, thank you for being here with us.”

  There was no applause as David sat down, but there were some wet eyes.

  “Thank you, David,” Richard said. “Now I won’t lie to you people. We have a monumental task in front of us. Not only have we suffered the personal loss of Seth, we’
ve also lost our leading man. If we’re going to continue, we have to find another actor willing to take on the role of Scrooge.”

  There were murmurs and people looking around the room. As for me, I glared at Vasti. She’d implied that finding another Scrooge would be easy; now it was time for her to pull a rabbit out of her hat. Unfortunately, from the expression on her face, she was fresh out of rabbits.

  “Why don’t you do it, Richard?” Carlelle said. “I bet you’ve got all the lines memorized already.”

  I could tell he was flattered, but Vasti burst in. “Oh, no, you don’t! We need Richard right where he is.”

  “Vasti’s right,” Richard said. “Directing you people is more than enough work for me.”

  “What about Sid? Or Oliver?” Tim asked.

  Sid shook his head vigorously. “I couldn’t do that. I’ve got all I can do to remember my own lines.” I’m sure Richard was relieved. The roly-poly man was perfectly cast as the Spirit of Christmas Present, but he was a worse fit for Scrooge than Seth had been.

  Oliver Jarndyce, who mangled his lines terribly, stood up eagerly, and I was sure I saw Richard flinch. “I’d be happy to jump in,” he said. I had to wonder if he’d be as eager once he realized he wasn’t going to be able to wear his reddish-brown toupee for the role.

  “That’s generous of you, Oliver,” Richard said, “but that would still leave us with a hole in the cast. We need a Spirit of Christmas Past.”

  Oliver started to say something else, but Aunt Maggie piped up, using that tone of voice that carries over and through other voices. “What about Big Bill? He’s been training for the part of Scrooge for years.”

  There were laughs, but to give Big Bill credit, he joined in.

  “But he’s already got a part, too,” Oliver said indignantly. “He’s Marley’s ghost.”

  “True,” Richard said. “Of course, Marley is a small role; somebody else could double up.”

  Oliver brightened up again. “In that case, perhaps I could—”

  “Why not let Pete Fredericks play Marley?” Idelle said. “He doesn’t have any lines as the Spirit of Christmas Yet to Come, and you can’t see his face in the robe I made him, so nobody will know he’s doubling up.”

  There was agreement from everybody but Oliver. All he seemed able to manage was, “But … but …”

  Richard took pity on him. “Oliver, if you’re really willing to take on another part …”

  “Anything!” Oliver said.

  “Vasti only cast one charity collector, but generally two are used. There aren’t any additional lines, but—”

  “I’ll do it!” Oliver said, and he sat down, looking quite pleased with himself.

  “Then we have our cast.” Big Bill, I realize you’ll have to work from a script tonight, but—”

  “Actually,” Big Bill said, “before I agree to the part, I have one condition.”

  “Oh?” Richard said. He looked concerned, and Vasti looked downright panic-striken.

  “As some of you may know, I’ve been trying to regain the affections of this lady here.” Big Bill put his hand on Aunt Maggie’s shoulder, and she promptly pushed it off again. “If she agrees to go out to dinner with me, I’ll play Scrooge.”

  “Oh for pity’s sake,” Aunt Maggie said, “are you that desperate for a date?”

  He didn’t answer, just smiled.

  Aunt Maggie could see that everybody was looking at her, and in Vasti’s and Richard’s case, they were staring beseechingly. “I suppose one dinner couldn’t hurt anything,” she finally said.

  “One dinner for each curtain call,” Big Bill persisted.

  She rolled her eyes, but said, “All right, one dinner for each curtain call, whatever that is. But don’t expect me to dress up!”

  “Maggie, you look fetching no matter what you wear.”

  Aunt Maggie snorted particularly loudly.

  Big Bill turned back to Richard and said, “Mr. Director, I accept the role with pleasure.” For the second time that night there was applause.

  Richard brought Big Bill onto the stage so they could discuss the part, and the other people either mingled or started work on whatever it was they were doing for the play. That meant that it was as good a time as any for Junior and me to get going. Only when we turned around, Mark Pope was standing right behind us. I hadn’t even realized he was in the building; he must have come in during Richard’s pep talk.

  “Hey there, Mark,” Junior said.

  “Junior,” he said. “I’m kind of surprised to see all of y’all here. When Mrs. Bumgarner called about my releasing the crime scene, I thought she just wanted a chance for everybody to get their belongings, but now I hear that y’all are going through with this thing after all.”

  “Apparently so.”

  “Do you think that’s a good idea? A man was murdered here.”

  “It’s not my decision,” she said. “Besides, I heard that you decided it was a burglar who killed Seth, and no sneak thief would come back here now.” She lifted one eyebrow. “Or have you changed your mind?”

  “I haven’t closed the investigation yet,” Mark said stiffly.

  “Then I guess it’s a good thing you’re here to protect us.”

  “What about you?”

  “You said you wanted to handle this case on your own—you go ahead and handle it.”

  “And Mrs. Fleming?” Mark asked.

  “What about her?”

  “Is she planning to interfere in my investigation?”

  “What Mrs. Fleming does is her own business,” Junior said firmly.

  “Not if she hinders a police investigation.”

  “She’s never hindered an investigation in Byerly before. I don’t expect her to start now.”

  Mark looked at me suspiciously, but all I did was smile. Though I didn’t like being talked about as if I weren’t there, I thought I’d do better to stay out of the conversation.

  Mark must have realized that he wasn’t going to get anything else out of us, because he nodded and said, “I think I’ll take another look outside.”

  “Keep an eye out for sneak thieves,” Junior said. “Or maybe you can catch that practical joker that’s been bothering us.”

  He stiffened but didn’t answer as he left.

  Once I was sure he was out of earshot, I said, “Junior, what in the Sam Hill is going on?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Since when does Mark talk to you like that, and since when do you put up with it?”

  “Remember what you said at your aunt’s house today? About your not backing out even if there was something I couldn’t tell you?”

  I didn’t like it, but I said, “I remember. But let me get this straight: we’re not telling Mark we’re investigating?”

  “Right.”

  “Even though he’s going to figure it out soon enough?”

  “That’s right.”

  I looked at her, hoping she’d tell me something more. She didn’t. So I said, “Well, if we’re going to interfere in a police investigation, let’s get going.”

  Chapter 11

  “What do we do first?” Junior asked.

  “What would you do if you were officially on the case?” I countered. Despite what Junior had said about wanting to see me in action, I was feeling a little self-conscious about working with an actual police officer.

  “I’d examine the crime scene. Which Mark has released, if you want to take a look.”

  I didn’t, but it was the logical place to start. “Let’s go.” As Junior and I made our way to the hallway, I saw Mark watching us with a frown on his face. Junior saw him too, but she didn’t say anything as she pulled the last scrap of yellow crime-scene tape off the door.

  The hall was empty. I suspected the rest of the cast was avoiding that part of the building. I would have too, given a choice. Other than Seth’s body being gone, it looked pretty much the same as it had the day before. Thankfully, somebody had cleaned up t
he stains on the floor.

  “Can I safely assume that you looked around while waiting for Mark to show up?” I asked.

  Junior just grinned.

  “So what exactly do you look for in a crime scene?”

  “Anything I can find,” she said, “though most of what I find doesn’t mean a thing. In this case, I didn’t have much time. I didn’t want to move Seth’s body around before the coroner got here, but I did make sure there was nothing under him that wasn’t supposed to be there. Then I looked around for a murder weapon, but couldn’t find one or even a good place to hide one. I was starting to think about how the killer got into and out of the hall when Mark showed up.”

  “Did you come to any conclusions?”

  “Not a one.”

  There were six doors leading from the hallway: one to the auditorium, four to other rooms, and one to the outside. I looked longingly at the door leading outside. Despite what I’d said to Vasti at my baby shower, I really hoped the killer had come through that door. Though I knew it would make investigating a lot harder, I preferred that to having to suspect somebody I knew. “Was the back door unlocked?”

  “Yes, though that doesn’t tell us much. The smokers in the cast had been coming in and out all day, so it was left unlocked. I locked up after we found Seth, to make sure nobody could sneak in behind me.”

  “Was there any sign of anybody coming in that way?”

  “Mark didn’t tell me.”

  I just looked at her.

  “Okay, I took a peek, but I didn’t see anything that would help. There were a lot of cigarette butts on the ground, but none of them were still burning. It’s all paved out there, so there couldn’t be any footprints, and there was no blood trail or sign of a murder weapon. We could go look again, but the forensic people have been all over it, so there’s not going to be anything left.”

  “Let’s not bother.” Next I tried to remember exactly where Seth’s body had been.

  Junior said, “The door wasn’t what hit him, if that’s what you’re thinking.”