Hey Sunshine

by Tia Giacalone

  Worst-case scenario, I’d just have to take Annabelle with me. She was usually cheerful and easy-going, but it was almost dinnertime, and I knew from experience that her mood could shift in a nanosecond. Plus, with the additional joy of potty training, frequent pit stops were our new travel style.

  I ran into my room and threw on a different shirt, grabbed my bag, and shoved the folder with my scene inside. Annabelle came out of her room wearing her backpack, and I locked up the house quickly and headed for the diner.

  When we got to the parking lot, I didn’t see Claire’s car anywhere, just Joy’s truck and the diner’s old pickup, along with a few other regulars. It was looking more and more like Annabelle would be accompanying me to campus.

  Annabelle held my hand as we breezed through the double doors. She was always excited to go to The Kitchen, because in her experience, it meant crayons, grilled cheese, and maybe ice cream if she was good.

  “Hey there, darlin’!” Joy greeted Annabelle, bending down to kiss her cheek. Annabelle happily scampered over to the hostess stand where we kept the crayons and coloring paper, her backpack bouncing as she walked.

  I scanned the restaurant for Claire, but there was no sign of her. Damn it, I was going to kill that girl. Ever since she hooked up with the cute starting pitcher from the community college, her head was in the clouds and she walked around with a dreamy smile all the time. And now, apparently, she also forgot about babysitting obligations.

  “Have you seen Claire?” I asked Joy.

  She snorted. “That girl? You mean the one who didn’t show up yesterday for her shift, and called halfway through to say she forgot? No, I haven’t seen her. When I do, she’s gonna get a talking-to, though. Nothing good comes of being barely eighteen and losing your head over some boy.” We shared an eye roll. “She’s scheduled to work two breakfast shifts this weekend, and her skinny behind better get it together, otherwise I’m gonna tell her mama.”

  “Well, add missing babysitting jobs to her list of offenses, because she was supposed to watch Annabelle for me this afternoon so I could go to my appointments on campus, and she’s a no-show.” I slumped down onto a stool at the counter and rested my chin on my arms.

  “Oh no! I am so sorry, sugar. I would take Annabelle in a minute, but I’m on my own here tonight with Billy, and you know we’ll be pretty busy. Did you ask Heather?” Joy looked distraught. She knew I rarely asked anyone to babysit, and that I was in a precarious position with graduation this spring.

  “She’s in Dallas at that wedding expo. It’s okay, Joy. I’ll just take Annabelle with me.” I hoped my voice didn’t sound as defeated as I felt. It wasn’t fair to Annabelle for me to drag her around tonight and expect perfect behavior, but I had done my best to make other arrangements, and there was nothing else I could do.

  I wasn’t sure if it was amusing or telling that neither of us mentioned Chase’s sister as a possibility. Elise’s “any time” offer was nice, but I didn’t take it seriously, especially when I was fairly certain she’d said it only for the benefit of Fox being within earshot, not out of any desire to get to know Annabelle.

  “I can do it.” I felt Fox’s presence before I heard his voice, but he still startled me.

  “What?” I asked stupidly. Joy looked surprised too, but pleased.

  “I can watch her for you, Avery. I’m off now, I worked a shift and a half to cover for Billy, but he’s taking over for dinner.” Fox came closer, a cup of coffee in his hand.

  My mind raced. I had to be at my advisor appointment in twenty minutes, which was almost physically impossible because campus was about twenty-five minutes away, and then after that I’d be about another half hour or so with my professor. I really only needed someone to care for Annabelle for two hours at the most, with driving time. This could actually work.

  But… I still didn’t really know Fox. After our impromptu lunch in the park, I felt closer to him, and he was great with Annabelle, but in reality he was practically a stranger. And then there was the surprise kiss… my cheeks burned every time I thought of how bold I was yesterday.

  Sure, I’d googled him a couple times, as would any normal person who had an undeniable yet completely inappropriate attraction to her boyfriend’s friend, but the description of his work history and college background didn’t tell me enough to determine if I should trust him with my child. There was still so much of the unknown about Fox, and he wasn’t exactly forthcoming with personal information. And it was a Friday night. Didn’t Fox have something else to do?

  Fox sensed my hesitation. “I want to help you. I give you my word, Avery, she will be safe with me.” My heart thudded a bit at the serious look on his face.

  He paused. “We can sit right there in that booth the whole time, and Joy can keep an eye on us.” He gestured to the table closest to the kitchen. “She needs to eat, right? I think I can handle that,” he said.

  I looked at the booth, to Annabelle sitting at the counter coloring obliviously, and back to Fox. Joy caught my eye and nodded almost imperceptibly, and I relaxed. My gut was telling me that Fox was sincere, and with Joy’s approval and watchful eye, I was suddenly certain that Annabelle would be in good hands.

  “Okay,” I said slowly. “Thank you. Two hours, tops.”

  Fox sipped from his cup again and nodded. “No problem.”

  “Annabelle, Mama has to go to school for a little while, okay?” I crouched down so I was at her level where she sat on the stool. “But you’re going to stay here with Auntie Joy and Mr. Fox, and have some dinner.”

  Annabelle looked up at Fox and grinned. My heart thumped its staccato beat when he smiled back at her. “Okay, Mama. Can I have a grilled cheese sammich? And apples?”

  “Sure, baby. I’ll be back in a little bit, be a good girl. Tell Auntie Joy if you need to use the potty.” I quickly moved her coloring paper and crayons to the booth and got her situated. Fox slid in next to her, and Annabelle immediately handed him a crayon.

  Time was ticking along, but I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the handsome, rough-around-the-edges man coloring so intently with my little girl. He said something quietly to Annabelle and she giggled, her little face lighting up. My heart was doing that funny thing again when Joy nudged me.

  “We’ve got her. Get a move on, darlin’. You’re gonna be late.” She winked.

  “Okay. Right. Thank you,” I looked to the booth. “Thanks again, Fox,” I said, blushing slightly when he turned his steady gaze to me.

  “Drive safe, Avery,” he replied, and Annabelle waved.

  I ran out to the parking lot and jumped in my car, intending to obliterate the speed limit the entire way, but I kept hearing Fox’s voice in my head and my foot eased off the gas pedal just enough to keep it respectable.

  * * *

  Almost exactly two hours later, I pulled my car back into the diner’s parking lot. I could see a few occupied tables through the window, but the place looked about half empty, typical for after the dinner rush.

  I had made good time; even taking seven minutes to stop quickly at the grocery store because I found myself done with my meetings earlier than planned, and solo grocery shopping was a luxury I didn’t take for granted. Seeing as no one had called my cell phone while I was gone, I assumed everything went smoothly and tried not to worry.

  But I still wasn’t completely prepared for seeing Annabelle and Fox sitting together in the same booth where I left them, a mostly empty dish of melted vanilla ice cream with two spoons on the table, and my baby girl cozied up into Fox’s side while he showed her something on his iPad. Her dolls and crayons were long forgotten in favor of Fox’s sleek tablet, and she giggled as she tapped the screen happily.

  Joy spotted me from across the diner where she was taking an order and gave me a thumbs up, which I took to mean that Annabelle and Fox had hit it off the whole time.

  I walked toward them, and Fox noticed me first. He nudged Annabelle, and when she looked up, her face split into a hug
e smile. They were both grinning at me, and my heart skipped again. I either needed to lay off the caffeine or consider getting that checked. It was getting ridiculous.

  “Mama, Mr. Fox has all the games! All the good ones!”

  “Oh really?” What were the odds on Angry Birds?

  Fox looked a little sheepish, an expression I wasn’t used to seeing on him. “They’re, um, school-related.” He turned the tablet toward me to reveal a letter-tracing app, and I tried to conceal my surprise. “She told me about her preschool, I thought it would be fun for her.”

  I was well aware of all the great learning programs available out there, and it was on my never-ending wish list to get Annabelle a tablet someday so she could use them. But every time I scraped together enough money, there was always something more imperative that came along, like car repairs or winter electric bills.

  “Thank you for showing me, Mr. Fox.” Annabelle surprised us both by kissing him on the cheek with her ice-cream covered lips. Apparently us Kent girls were big on the sneak attack when it came to random affection.

  “It was my pleasure, Annabelle,” Fox said. “Anytime.”

  Annabelle considered this carefully. “Okay,” she agreed. “But I need my own ice cream.”

  * * *

  Fox insisted on carrying Annabelle to the car for me when we left. It was quickly approaching her bedtime, and she made no protest as he scooped her up and led the way out to the parking lot. After settling her in her car seat, I saw him eyeing the grocery bags that filled the rest of my backseat.

  “I stopped at the store really quickly,” I said, feeling suddenly guilty. What if he was mad that I hadn’t come straight back? “I hope that was okay.”

  “Of course, Avery. I told you it wasn’t a problem for me to hang out with Annabelle.” He looked at the bags again. “That’s a lot for you to carry and get her out of the car.”

  We both looked over at Annabelle, who was fighting sleep and losing, her tired eyes half closed.

  “I do it all the time,” I said, trying to keep my voice bright. Annabelle’s mouth opened and shut with a little sigh and it took everything in my power not to succumb to the contagious yawn syndrome.

  “I’m sure you do,” he said. “You could probably use a break.”

  I shrugged, not sure where he was going with this. “It’s not a big deal.”

  Fox chuckled a little, a sound that made me think of velvet and waves crashing, or something equally as corny. I blinked dazedly as he continued to speak. “You really don’t make it easy, do you? I’ll make a formal request, then. May I follow you home and help you carry your groceries, Avery?”

  Every time he said my name in that rough, deep voice, like the word was important and sacred, something happened in my body. It started in my gut, and spread upwards into my chest, constricting my lungs in the best possible way until I wasn’t sure if I could stand to breathe if I never heard it again.

  And then when he looked at me in that certain way, another feeling originated much farther south, causing me to clench my thighs together and reach out a hand to steady myself against my car so I wouldn’t give away the shakiness of my legs.

  In a perfect world, he would be oblivious to his effect on me, but I was certain that almost nothing went unnoticed by Fox.

  He volunteered to babysit your kid, and now he wants to help you unload groceries? My mind was on overdrive. Was this guy for real? For a brief second, my thoughts flashed to Chase and the last thing he’d said to me before heading off on his boys’ weekend.

  “Babe, don’t forget to pick up my dry cleaning while I’m gone, okay? You’re the best.”

  I rolled my eyes when I remembered his light, happy walk as he strolled to his SUV, eager to get out of town and drink beers with his buddies at the cabin. He was completely unconcerned with anything I had going on or obligations he might be piling on top of my already stacked load. He knew ‘my life was hard,’ as he’d so delicately put it, but he still didn’t seem to care. And now here was Fox, not only noticing but wanting to help.

  I felt a familiar wave of uncertainty and defensiveness wash over me. I must look so stupid to him, trying to keep all these balls in the air while my immature boyfriend is off gallivanting with his high-school pals. “Most Organized” didn’t need anyone to help her. The idea of him pitying me was unbearable, and I couldn’t allow it.

  “No thank you, I’ll be just fine,” I said, my voice clipped.

  Fox’s brow furrowed as he took in the change in my demeanor. One second I was practically melting into a Fox-sicle, and the next I was giving him the brush-off. He probably thought I was a lunatic, but I’d be damned if I’d take any more of his sympathetic aid.

  Fox cocked his head to one side, studying me. “Did I say something wrong? I’m just trying to–”

  “I know, I know, ‘help me out.’ But I don’t need it, so thanks anyway.” I turned quickly and moved to open the driver’s side door, but Fox shot his hand out and held it shut.

  All I wanted was to get in my car, slam the door, drive off, and never have to see that concerned look in his eyes again. It reminded me of things I couldn’t help, of actions I couldn’t undo, and choices I couldn’t remake. I felt tears pricking the corners of my own eyes and I squeezed them shut, both to block out the sight of his beautiful, confused face, and also to try and hold back the emotions I apparently couldn’t control. With my eyes closed tight, I took a deep breath and counted to three before I opened them, hoping I’d suddenly be alone in the parking lot with Annabelle.

  No such luck.

  “Shit, Avery. I’m sorry.” Fox lifted his hand from the door, allowing me access. Even though I wanted nothing more than to get the hell out of there and go feel sorry for myself in a pint of ice cream, I hesitated.

  “I didn’t mean to imply you couldn’t handle it. I know you can; you do. I’ve seen it.” Fox spoke cautiously once he realized I wasn’t going to run, his voice low and full of palpable sincerity. He dragged a frustrated hand through his hair.

  I slumped against the car. “I know you were just trying to help me. I’m sorry I overreacted. I–” I don’t want you to feel sorry for me, I continued in my head. I want you to think I’m self-sufficient and smart and amazing. I want you to wrap your arms around me and make me forget everything that isn’t you.

  But I didn’t say any of that. Instead I just stood there with my ice cream melting in the grocery bags, my baby snoring softly in her car seat, and my oblivious, self-centered boyfriend forty miles and ten beers away. I shook my head at myself in disgust. Who wants all of this? Why was he bothering? A crazy girl with a toddler and an unfinished degree in dreaming probably didn’t top most guys’ wish lists.

  Fox shifted uncomfortably, bringing my focus back to him. “I have something I want to show you, okay? So I’m going to ask one more time. Please, let me follow you home and help you get settled in tonight. I know you don’t need it, but it’ll make me feel better.” He opened my car door slowly, like I was a frightened deer about to bolt.

  What was I doing? Fox obviously wanted to be my friend. Since when had I decided there were too many people in my life who cared about me, about Annabelle? Put your ego aside, Avery, and let the guy be nice to you.

  “Okay,” I said.

  Fox looked surprised but pleased, which made me feel horrible for doubting his intentions. “Okay? Okay, good.”

  When we reached my house, Fox pulled the diner’s pickup behind my car and started unloading groceries while I carried Annabelle inside and put her to bed. She was exhausted and limp, barely stirring as I changed her into pajamas and tucked her in.

  I came back into the kitchen just as Fox was unpacking the last of the bags. “You didn’t have to do all that,” I said, hiding a smile as I watched his big hands carefully placing apples and oranges in my fruit bowl.

  He turned at the sound of my voice. I stood very still, conscious of his eyes on me. I’d swept my hair into a messy bun and kicked
off my shoes in Annabelle’s room, and one side of my shirt had slipped down over my shoulder, exposing the thin strap of the tank I wore underneath. I felt his gaze zero in on that exposed skin, and a flush crept up my neck to my cheeks.

  Nervously, I cleared my throat and the moment was gone. Fox smiled neutrally and shrugged. “Your ice cream was melting.”

  I crossed purposefully to the fridge, trying to shake the feeling of those eyes on my bare skin. “Do you want a soda or something? I didn’t have dinner, so I’m starving. But maybe you ate with Annabelle…” I trailed off, realizing I was rambling. His intensity was unnerving in a crowd but alone it was magnified times ten thousand. It would take a lifetime for me to get used to that.

  He won’t be here that long, I remembered. He told you that himself, he wasn’t here to stay, he’s just passing through.

  “No thanks.” Fox looked at me curiously, like he could imagine everything I was thinking.

  Lord, I hoped not.

  “Make yourself at home.” I gestured to my little kitchen table and he sat, snagging an apple out of the bowl.

  I quickly finished making my turkey sandwich and sat across from him. My eyes automatically admired the big, even bites he took from his apple before I caught myself and awkwardly looked away.

  Fox reached into his messenger bag on the floor and pulled out his tablet. Propping it on the table, he tapped the screen a few times and turned it toward me.

  “I made this tonight.”

  I wasn’t sure what to expect when Fox said he had something to show me, but this definitely wasn’t on the list of possibilities I’d considered.

  The screen went dark then brightened slowly to focus on a small hand that I recognized as Annabelle’s. Only her little fingers gripping the crayon were visible, the surroundings blurred, and then the scene flashed over to Joy, smiling warmly, her pen behind her ear. Then a long-distance shot of Billy’s profile, singing in the kitchen, just a snippet of his voice carrying out to the tables. Back to Annabelle, her face hidden almost entirely by a huge glass of milk, her eyes visible over the top. Then a french-fry castle, held together with toothpicks, and ketchup for the moat.