Providence

by Karen Noland

  “Oh! You are so exasperating, Kathleen Shaughnessey!” Martha stomped her foot, raising a small cloud of red dust. “When are you going to give up and admit to me that you’re falling for him?”

  “When the moon turns to blue cheese and that cow over there jumps over it!”

  Chapter thirteen

  Kate breathed in the rich scent of sun-warmed earth as she picked through dark leaves, finding the yellow squash below. Snapping them from the vine, she placed them in a basket that was rapidly filling with ripe produce. Cucumbers, tomatoes and squash jumbled together in colorful profusion. She and Nana would be busy the next few days canning, drying and preserving the bountiful harvest to see them through the winter. Jo worked nearby, pulling carrots and chatting to her doll who rode along in the small wagon that groaned beneath its succulent orange burden.

  Jake had left that morning to inspect the fields planted in corn and oats, and the hay meadows to the east. Jonathan worked in the barn making sure the hay mow and the rakes would be ready to begin the cutting that was rapidly approaching. Luke rode the fence lines and managed the herds, already beginning the selection process of two and three year old steers, aged cows and weaker heifers to be sent to market in the fall. Keeping the herds viable and managing the growth of the herd in relation to the available grazing land was a vital concern in the management of the ranch.

  Kate sat back on her heels with a sigh, stretching her aching back and wiping the sweat from her brow. Even as she longed for the cool days of autumn, to see the changing color of the leaves that signaled the approach of colder months, she was struck by a pang of sorrow, knowing that Luke would be leaving then.

  He carried a burden that went deeper than his relationship with his father, Kate was certain of it even though he never mentioned it. They had developed a deep friendship in the weeks since the branding. Riding together in the early mornings, or sitting alone on the porch in the evenings after a late supper, they talked of many things, the ranch and its needs, their past, their families. Kate had learned much about this man who had entered her life, but she sensed there was more, something held deeply within, a scar so painful that he not let go of it to her or even to God.

  She thought of her own scars, physical scars, painful and hidden in shame. What would Luke think if he saw the disfigured flesh of her arms? Were his emotional scars any less painful? Lost in thought, Kate was startled by a shout from Jo.

  “Momma, Momma, look! Someone’s coming.”

  Kate stood, shading her eyes against the midday glare of a relentless sun. She saw two riders approaching from the south, red dust billowing around them in a great cloud. As they grew closer, she realized they were driving an enormous red bull with a white face, short horns and a ring through his nose. She smiled and waved at Mike Hall, gesturing toward the corrals, where they could safely pen the Hereford until Luke’s return.

  “Jo, run and tell Nana to get some lunch ready for Mike and whoever is with him. We’ll be down in a few minutes.”

  “Yes, Momma,” Jo answered and scurried off to find Nana.

  Gathering up her skirts, Kate hurried to the corrals. Mike was just closing the gate as she arrived. The bull snorted a few times then dropped his head to graze on the sparse grass.

  “That is a fine looking animal, Mike,” Kate said.

  “He does real good for us, and if you like what he produces for you, I’ve got a son of his out of a good Hereford cow that I could make you a real good deal on,” Mike offered.

  “I may just do that,” Kate said appraising the massive creature before her. Turning to the other rider, Kate exclaimed, “Michael, it’s so good to see you! I thought you were firmly ensconced in your business up at Kingfisher. Look at you, all grown up and married, too, or so I hear!”

  “It’s good to see you, too, Mrs. Shaughnessey.” The Hall’s eldest son smiled broadly.

  “What brings you down this way?”

  “I just wanted to bring Annie down to see the home place and meet the rest of the family,” Michael replied.

  “I understand congratulations are in order for you two.” Kate smiled.

  “Yes, Ma’am, the little one should be here early this fall,” Michael replied. Kate sensed a note of pride, but thought she saw a momentary shadow pass over his features.

  “Well, I guess that makes you a grandpa, Mike, and a new one of your own coming as well.” Kate shook her head as she turned to Mike, who was beaming with pride. “How about some lunch? Mrs. Insley should have a little something ready at the house.”

  “That sounds like just the thing.”

  “Why don’t you put your horses in the pen on the other side of the barn. There’s water and hay there,” Kate suggested, “then come on down to the house.”

  “We’ll be there shortly,” Mike said taking the reins of his horse and heading for the barn.

  ***

  Stopping at the garden to retrieve the basket of vegetables, Kate continued on to the house. Nana had placed a table on the porch adorned with a fresh white cloth. Pewter plates were stacked neatly to one side while platters of bread, smoky sliced meats, bowls of curded cheese, relish and fresh fruit vied for attention in the center. Jo was busy spreading muslin cloths over the platters to keep away the ever present flies, and Nana carried a pitcher of milk from the spring house. Kate marveled again at the bounty the Lord continued to provide.

  “Hi, Momma, who’s here?” Jo asked brimming with curiosity.

  “Mr. Hall and Michael. They brought the Hereford bull that he promised to loan us,” Kate replied.

  “Oh, I can’t wait to see Michael. I haven’t seen him since I was just a little girl. He’ll be surprised at how big I’ve gotten, won’t he Momma?” Jo chatted incessantly, continuing to flick at the droning flies. “Jeremy said that Michael got married and his wife is gonna have a baby. Does that make Jeremy an uncle? I wish we had a baby, then I could hold it and rock it, and sing songs to it. I do that with my doll, but I think it would be better with a real baby.” Jo paused, a frown creasing her brow. “You have to be married to have a baby, don’t you, Momma?”

  “Well, yes, that’s the way God intended for families to be,” Kate said finding a niche for her heavy basket in the cool dark kitchen. “Why?”

  Jo heaved a weary sigh, “I just wish you could have a new baby for us, but....”

  Kate smiled at the wistful tone in Jo’s voice. Returning to the sunlit porch, she gathered Jo up in her arms. “Honey, God has so richly blessed our lives already, maybe someday He’ll see fit to bless us in that way, too.”

  Jo threw her arms around her mother and buried her face in Kate’s neck. “I’m gonna keep praying for that.”

  “Look. Here come the Halls,” Kate said setting Jo down.

  A flash of petticoats and red curls bolted down the stairs as Jo launched herself into Michael’s arms. “Oh, Michael, it’s so good to see you again. I bet you don’t even recognize me, do you?”

  “Could this my wild Irish rose all grown up?” Michael asked swooping her up in a warm embrace.

  Jo beamed from ear to ear, her fiery hair and petal soft pink cheeks echoing the bloom for which he named her.

  “Hello, Jo, been climbing any windmills today?” the elder Hall asked her.

  “Oh, no sir, I’ll never do that again,” Jo replied earnestly, earning a hearty laugh from them both. Michael set Jo down and she ran off looking for her pup.

  “Nana Insley!” Michael called to the frail woman fussing over the table.

  “Well little Michael Hall, as I live and breathe!” Nana exclaimed as she all but disappeared in his massive arms. “Only you aren’t so little anymore,” she said, regaining her composure.

  “Nana, it looks as though you’ve out done yourself again,” Mike commented, casting an appreciative eye over the lunch table.

  “Oh, you know how ‘tis, cooking for all the hungry mouths around this place, a body just does what she can,” Nana replied as she wiped at a spot on
the table that only she could see.

  “Shall we eat?” Kate asked. “I expected Luke back by now, but maybe he’s been detained.” She sighed, scanning the horizon for any glimpse of him.

  “Luke?” Michael asked.

  “Sort of foreman Kate hired a while back,” Mike filled his son in.

  “Anyone I know?”

  “He’s not from around here,” Kate supplied. “He drifted in early last spring, and Martha Jansen thought he’d make a good hired hand for me. Seems I was having trouble keeping on any local help.” Kate smiled wryly.

  “Well, all this jabber isn’t getting you men fed,” Nana complained. “Let’s eat!”

  Mike asked a blessing upon the meal and those assembled, then the men fell to filling their plates and discussing the weather.

  “Does it seem like a hotter summer to you, Mrs. Shaughnessey?” Michael asked between bites. He was sitting in a straight-backed chair, balancing a heaping plate on his broad lap.

  “Won’t you please call me Kate?” she asked with a grin. “Mrs. Shaughnessey seems so formal now that you’re all grown up.”

  “I don’t know, might be kind of hard to get used to.”

  “You’ll manage. And yes, it does seem like an unusually hot summer. Good thing we had some rains early on, but we could sure use some more.” Kate wiped her face with the edge of her apron before picking up her plate and finding a comfortable spot on the stairs to eat.

  “Looks like your garden and fruit trees came on fine this year. Greta’s did right well, too. How’re Jake’s crops doing?” Mike asked.

  “He’s out checking them now, but so far they seem to be doing fine. I believe he’s going to start harvesting the corn this week. And I think we’ll be cutting hay here real soon, too.”

  “Kate, I have a favor to ask of you,” Mike said, his voice taking on an earnest tone.

  “Mike, you know I’d do just about thing for you. What is it?”

  “Greta’s time is comin’ real soon, I’d be obliged if you’d come on out to midwife for her.”

  “Well, of course I will, but she’s never had any trouble before, has she?”

  “No, but she’s not as young as she was, and she’s been a bit weak these last few weeks.”

  “You just send one of the boys out here in time to fetch me, don’t wait too long! I’ll be there for her.” Kate reached over and laid a reassuring hand upon his arm. “What about your Annie, Michael? How is she doing with her first one?”

  “Can’t rightly say. She doesn’t say much about it, but she sure looks pale and sickly these last months. That’s one of the reasons I brought her out here, Mrs. - I mean, Kate,” Michael paused. “I thought Ma could give her some encouragement or something. I mean after all, she’s been through it a few times herself.”

  Kate laughed, “That she has, but I’m not sure it’s encouragement she needs right now. Has she been seeing a doctor at all?”

  “Yes ma’am, back in Kingfisher, we have a real good doc. He says everything is fine, and she should have no reason to worry.”

  “Well, Michael, it is a scary thing for a woman to face, especially the very first time. Will you both still be there when Greta has hers?”

  “I’ve got to get back to the store, but I’m trying real hard to convince Annie to stay on here. I think she’d be better off here with mom to look after her. I can get down to see her from time to time, and once the baby’s here and they’re both well, then they could come back home with me.”

  “That actually sounds like a good plan to me. What does Annie think?”

  “She hasn’t said too much one way or the other, but I’m thinking she’ll probably stay.”

  “That’s good. Your mother could do her a world of good.”

  “Yes, ma’am, she sure could.”

  A movement along the ridge caught Kate’s attention. Shading her eyes with one hand, she could make out the gleaming coat of the buckskin colt. The form took shape as horse and rider came closer. Kate smiled at the sight. Luke had done a fine job with the young horse, and he was quickly becoming a sound, reliable mount.

  “Looks like Luke is headed in for lunch. You’ll get a chance to meet him after all,” Kate said watching their approach.

  Luke rode into the yard. Swinging down from the buckskin, he loosened the girth, removed the headstall and turned the colt loose to graze. He paused at the pump in the yard long enough to splash water over his face and hands, then turned and strode to the porch.

  “Luke, Mike brought the Hereford over this morning,” Kate called to him.

  “Thought he must have. I saw the bull up at the corrals. Good looking beast, Mike,” Luke said, helping himself to a plate and heaping it with food.

  “Thanks. Do you need help driving him out to pasture?” Mike asked.

  “Nah, we can handle it tomorrow.”

  “Luke, I want you to meet Michael, the Hall’s oldest boy,” Kate said turning to the young man at the far side of the table. The look in Michael’s eyes sent a chill through Kate. His jaw was clenched, his eyes cold. A shiver of fear shot through her, and she turned, puzzled to Luke. He stood rooted to the rough wooden planks of the porch. Kate thought she saw a flicker of pain before an inscrutable mask descended over his handsome features.

  “Michael,” Luke rasped.

  “Luke Josey,” Michael replied, clenching his fists tightly at his side.

  An awkward silence ensued punctuated by faint laughter drifting from the garden. A dog barked joyously, and soon running feet announced Jo’s arrival.

  “Hello, Mr. Josey,” Jo laughed, grabbing him tightly about the waist in a warm embrace. “Are all the cows doing well today? Did you check the bee gum? Are we going to have honey soon? Look, the Halls have come, and they brought a big bull with them.”

  Luke closed his eyes briefly, then set his plate on the table, and tousled Jo’s hair with a faint indulgent smile. “I’m suddenly not very hungry. If you’ll excuse me, I have work to do.” He strode to where the colt grazed, startling the buckskin with his abrupt approach. The horse snorted and backed up, but stood quietly while Luke bridled him and tightened the saddle. Mounting, he turned the horse out of the yard and they rode swiftly away.

  “What’s the matter with Mr. Josey, Momma? Did I do something bad?” Jo asked with a frown.

  “No, honey, you didn’t do anything wrong,” Kate reassured the small girl. As Jo’s lip began to quiver, Kate gave her a quick hug, patted her back tenderly, and placed a light kiss upon her milky forehead. “Now, why don’t you go in and help Nana clean up these dishes, okay?”

  “Yes, ma’am,” Jo said, though Kate could tell she was not thoroughly convinced.

  As Jo disappeared into the kitchen, Kate turned a questioning look on Michael, “I take it you two have met before?”

  “Briefly.”

  “Do you want to tell me about it?” Mike asked his suddenly taciturn son.

  “Not really. He was a friend of Joe’s, Annie’s brother.” Michael continued to stare in the direction Luke had taken. “Unless you need me here, I’m going to head back.” Without waiting for a response, Michael left, heading for the barn where his horse was corralled. Moments later Kate saw him ride in the same direction Luke had gone.

  “Mike?” Kate asked, searching the face of her friend for answers.

  Mike shook his head and shrugged, “I don’t know Kate. I honestly don’t know.”

  ***

  With a heavy heart Kate tucked the faded quilt snugly around Jo’s small body. “There you are, sweetheart,” she said, placing a tender kiss on Jo’s tear stained cheek. “Sleep well, I’ll see you in the morning.”

  “But Momma, why did he go? I want Luke to come home,” Jo sniffed.

  Kate sighed as she stroked the curls that lay spread upon the muslin pillow. “Honey, I don’t know why he left the way he did. I pray that he’ll come home, but I don’t know, I just don’t know.” The emptiness Kate felt was mirrored in Jo’s eyes. She gat
hered the forlorn child in her arms and rocked her until exhaustion overcame grief and Jo slept fitfully.

  She laid the sleeping child upon the pillow, arranging the light covers tenderly. Picking up the oil lamp from the bedside table, she made her way down from the tiny loft. The Insleys had left early this evening, dismayed over Luke’s disappearance. Jonathan vowing to ride out after him, had been firmly dissuaded by Kate.

  Drifting through the dim room her thoughts focused on Luke. Where is he? What is his burden? As much as she found herself drawn to him, loving him, she knew that until he exorcised the ghosts of his past, there could be no future for them.

  She tried to read, but the words would not conform to any sense upon the printed page. Her mind wandered. Turning to prayer, she implored the Father to watch over Luke, give him the peace he so desperately sought. She prayed for Greta and Annie and the innocent souls they carried within them, and finally she prayed for herself, asking her Father for the courage and strength to face an uncertain future.

  Knowing the Lord had heard her prayer, but unable to deny the gnawing angst within her, she rose and paced the length of the small room. Passing the window, her eye caught a hint of movement beyond the shadows of the dogwood trees. Impatiently tossing aside the sheer lace curtains, she peered intently into the gathering darkness, as though willing Luke to appear before her eyes. The flicker of movement came again, and Kate could just make out the silent, swift flight of a night owl honing in on his evening’s prey. Moments later, a haunting screech lent credence to the vision. Sighing she let the curtains fall as she turned from the window.

  Running her fingers through her hair, she removed the ribbon and the few pins holding it in place. Kate shook her head and let the gleaming curls fall loose as she brushed it vigorously. She felt the grief within her as though an invisible hand laid hold of her heart, bearing down inexorably until she was certain that the very life would soon be wrung from her.

  In an attempt to escape the crushing burden, she slipped into the soft darkness of the night, with only the lamp to light her path. The warm air enveloped her, caressing her skin like a lover’s embrace. A thousand cicadas sang an evening chorus accented by the deep baritone of bull frogs, with the soft hooting of an owl adding the woodwinds. Kate stopped, letting her senses absorb the rich tapestry of life abounding in the night. The orchestra was brought to a crescendo and suddenly stilled by the mournful howl of a lone coyote. The plaintive wail awoke a stirring within her soul that echoed the lonely sound. She closed her eyes as the cry died, and the symphony of the night began to play once again.