One Last Call

by Susan Behon

  Let me get home. He started the truck and drove as carefully as he could, squinting through the shimmer across his vision, and the sunlight reflecting off the hood of his truck and the windshields on the passing cars. Hell, it was even bouncing off the pavement on the streets. The passing scenery looked like a movie with the brightness cranked all the way up, and then some, on the screen.

  Josh gripped the steering wheel and focused on the road ahead of him. The drive seemed endless. He counted off the streets to his apartment. By the time Josh pulled into the parking lot behind the bakery, he was pretty sure he was going to puke on his shoes. Damn, if he threw up, his eyeballs might as well pop right out of his head.

  He made it to the wrought-iron stairs leading to his apartment and held on to the railing like a lifeline. The metal was sun-warmed and solid under his hand. He’d hold on and make his way upstairs. Josh had been through this before, and he could do it again. One step at a time. That was all he needed to do, put one foot in front of the other.

  Normally he jogged up the stairs to his place. Today he practically dragged himself upstairs while using the railing as a crutch. There’s the door! The pain in his head turned excruciating. He told himself to get inside, and it’d all be good. Just get inside. Josh jammed the key in the lock and pushed the door open.

  He’d pulled down all the blinds in his kitchen and living room before he left last night. Thank God. The AC had been left on too. His apartment was as cool and dark as a cave. He wanted to slam the door against the bright light plaguing him and stabbing at his eyeballs. He closed it with a soft snick instead. Any loud noise was a bad idea. A slamming door would sound like cannon fire.

  Josh made it to his room, drew the blinds, and tore off his sunglasses. He threw them on the nightstand in a careless fling. He kicked off his boots, turned on his fan, and fell onto the bed in a heap. Holy fuck. Big mistake. He should have eased onto it. His brain caught up with the downward dive his head had taken and slammed around in his skull like a pinball machine. There went more throbbing. Nausea rose with it.

  He swallowed and pressed his palms into the soft divets of his temples, trying to push the pain back down through sheer force. Throb, throb, throb…It was fuckin’ agony and it kept rolling over him like the tide. His pulse beat against his hands in time with the pain. Josh curled up on his side, making slow movements. Sleep was the only thing that would make it all go away. If he could do that, the headache was usually gone when he woke up again.

  Josh had to get through this so he could get back to Sarah. What the hell was he thinking leaving her when no one knew where Richard was? He must have beat a land-speed record for how quickly he’d fucked up again with her. He gritted his teeth and endured each wave in the painful onslaught.

  Walking out in the middle of an argument without an explanation was a mistake, headache episode or not. It was time to come clean about the fallout from his head injury. He would do that, and Sarah would understand. She had to. For the time being, Josh let the pain and darkness overtake him.

  * * * *

  She was officially sick of men. Sarah couldn’t believe Josh flew off the handle and left that easily. He wouldn’t even stay to talk it over, and she sure as hell wasn’t going to beg him not to go. How could he think he was a dirty secret? What they had was new and wonderful.

  Sarah was only being cautious because she’d had enough of her private life broadcast across town when Richard cheated on her. Gossip was bad enough. Worse was the invasion of privacy she felt now that there were pictures and possibly video of them having sex. She cringed at the thought of something so special being seen by someone else.

  All he had to say was, “Later”?

  “Sarah?”

  He tosses out, “I’ll call you,” and did he call? Nope. It wasn’t like he was super busy or anything. Sophie told her that his truck had been in the parking lot all day. All day and not so much as a single text.

  “Sarah?”

  “Screw him.”

  “Um, screw who?”

  Her new waitress-in-training, Julie, was staring at her with wide violet-blue eyes, most likely thinking she’d gone nuts. Men. Time to get back to real life. “I’m sorry, Julie. What were you saying?”

  “Table six needs two Coors Lights and a refill on the Sprite.” Julie was the antithesis of Kelly. She was short, soft-spoken, a little on the too-thin side and had her hair thrown up in a cute shiny black ponytail at the top of her head. She was pretty in a natural, understated way. Sarah enjoyed Julie’s candor. She said exactly what she thought, sometimes to her own embarrassment.

  When Alex Ross, the fire chief, ordered a Sprite, Julie had openly stared at him and said, “Oh, my God. You’re beautiful.” Obviously thinking that he’d heard her wrong, Alex did a double take and responded with, “Excuse me?”

  From Sarah’s viewpoint, the mortification radiating from Julie was palpable. “Oh, no! I said that out loud, didn’t I? I’m sorry!” Her explanation didn’t help matters. “It’s just that you seem so perfect. I’ve never seen a man so…Well, look at you.” She motioned toward his Madison Falls Fire Dept. T-shirt. “You’re a firefighter too? You have to be brave for a job like that. I bet you’re strong. And do you not drink in general, or are you on duty and…” Realizing her words weren’t appropriate to the situation, Julie bit her lip. “I did it again. I’m sorry. I’ll shut up now. One Sprite coming up.”

  Alex was a good-looking man, with light brown hair cropped short to his scalp, and kind, coffee-brown eyes. He was muscular too, befitting his job. Alex Ross was also one of the few men Sarah had ever seen blush. Alex stared up at Julie from the booth, red-faced and speechless, looking like he couldn’t believe she was real or that this was really happening to him. The ribbing from the other guys calling him pretty didn’t help matters.

  Julie had gotten through the rest of their drink orders and managed to deliver them without too much incident. She’d bumped into a patron or two and hip-checked a few table corners. To her credit, Julie kept a cheerful disposition. Now, she was nervous about facing round two with Alex and his friends.

  “Should I tell him sorry again? I never talk to men like that. I got thrown off when I saw him sitting there.” Julie seemed genuinely shocked by her own behavior. “From now on, I promise you that I’ll make sure my inner monologue stays in my head where it belongs. You won’t believe this, but I’m normally shy.”

  Sarah believed her. “It’s okay, Julie. No harm done.” From the looks of it, Alex and his buddies had already forgotten the incident and gotten sidetracked watching the ball game.

  Julie started to peek over her shoulder at Alex’s booth before stopping herself. “He probably thinks I throw myself at all the customers.”

  Sarah caught sight of Kelly when she sashayed between a few of her usual gawkers. Her other waitress was serving one of the larger tables. If she wasn’t mistaken, Kelly had bumped into the new high school football coach and slipped him her number.

  Sarah was tempted to roll her eyes. “No worries about that, Julie. Keep delivering the right orders to the right people, do it quickly, and always do it with a smile on your face.”

  “I’m not fired yet?”

  “Not yet.” Sarah filled the drink orders and set them on the tray for her.

  “Here goes nothing.” Julie plastered a smile on her face and took the drinks to Alex’s booth.

  Everything went smoothly until Alex glanced up from his conversation and bestowed a welcoming smile of his own. Julie tripped over her feet. Half of the soft drink that she’d been about to set on the table sloshed out of the glass and landed in his lap. He jumped up with the shock of the ice and the cold liquid dousing him. Julie, trying to fix things, wiped off his soaked crotch with a bar towel. Swipe after swipe, his friends roared with laughter. With a mumbled, “Forget about it,” Alex made a grab for the towel without much luck. He then took Julie by the shoulders and set her firmly away from him.r />
  “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it. You smiled and I…” Julie shoved the towel at him and walked carefully back to Sarah. Her eyes were shimmering with tears. “Are you going to fire me now?”

  Chapter 19

  SARAH came out from behind the bar, put an arm around Julie and led her down the back hall to the ladies’ room. Kelly could be heard saying, “So much for that one.”

  Julie sniffled and pushed the door open. Once they were inside, she straightened her shoulders. “It’s okay. I understand.”

  Sarah located some toilet paper and handed it to Julie so she could dab away the tears. “Understand what?”

  “Understand that you want to, that you’re going to, you know, fire me.”

  “Honey, I’m not going to fire you. I brought you back here so you could regroup and blow your nose.”

  Julie held the wad of toilet paper to her face. Her voice was muffled through the handful of tissue. “Why aren’t you firing me?”

  “I have a feeling that Alex Ross is the only reason you’re running into things and spilling drinks. Am I right?” Otherwise, Julie had done a stellar job for a first-time server.

  “I’m sorry, Sarah.” She rubbed under her nose. “I swear to you that I will remain strictly professional from now on. A sexy smile won’t trip me up again.”

  Sarah thought about Josh. “Let’s not make any promises. How about you do the best you can and move on?”

  “It’s weird. Nothing like that has ever happened to me before.” Julie shook her head at the strangeness of it. “He’s just a man, right? I’ll block him out and get back to work.”

  If it were only that simple.

  Kelly pushed open the door, bringing a cloud of her cloying perfume with her. “Hey, boss, your cowboy’s here and asking for you.” She didn’t spare a glance at Julie.

  “Thanks. Tell him I’m busy.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Yep.” Josh could sit his sweet ass down and wait for her. Sarah wasn’t jumping for anyone.

  Kelly smirked, a shark smelling fresh meat. “I’ll make sure to tell him for you.”

  “Fabulous. Do that. Thanks.” Sarah was sure that whatever Kelly had to tell him, would involve cleavage and a ton of flirting. She was almost too pissed off to care about that.

  Julie straightened her Suds and Spud’s T-shirt and tucked a stray ebony strand of hair behind her ear. She sniffed and blotted. “Thank you for the second chance, Sarah. I’m ready to get back to it now.”

  Second chances seemed to be Sarah’s thing. It was the idea of third chances that she wasn’t so sure about.

  * * * *

  After wiping down the bar twice, texting her mom, her sister, and checking her e-mail, Sarah decided to make it back to her office where Josh was most likely waiting. The door was ajar since she’d forgotten to call Reed about fixing the casing. She stuck that on her mental to-do list.

  Josh was sitting in her chair when Sarah nudged the door the rest of the way open. He was sprawled out like he owned the joint. He’d dressed up in a faded blue denim button-up and black jeans. The shirt brought out the blue in his eyes. The first few buttons were undone to show the tan skin at his throat. He was cleanly shaven and smelling like the poster boy for hot sex. Damn, he’d broken out the big guns.

  There was a bouquet of sunflowers wrapped in cellophane resting in the center of the desk. They reminded her of the golden sun tattoo on his arm with her initials. The one she’d traced with her fingertips, and later with her lips. So what if the flowers were beautiful? He’d have to work harder than that. She wasn’t going to soften that easily!

  Sarah closed the door and leaned against it. She crossed her arms over her chest and went for her best impression of indifference. “Josh. What brings you by?”

  He wasn’t as relaxed as he seemed. Josh grabbed the flowers and rounded the desk before the last word was out of her mouth. “I’m sorry, Sarah.” He held the bouquet out to her. She took it automatically. “Will you let me explain?”

  “So, explain.” She shifted out of his reach and laid the flowers back on the desk. “By the way, Chris was already here so the cameras have been removed.”

  “I know.”

  “You do?”

  “He called me. I talked to Seth too. They’re still tracin’ the cameras, searchin’ for the receiver.”

  “That’s what they tell me. The one in here was hidden in the air vent. Who knows how long it’s been in here?”

  “They didn’t find any others?”

  “No, they were pretty thorough.” Sarah shivered. “Still creeps me out.”

  “Of course it does. Whoever planted the cameras invaded your privacy. They had no right to do that to you. Honey, I want you to come home with me tonight.”

  “Whoa! Hold up there, cowboy. Why would I want to do that?”

  “Cowboy?” Josh raised his eyebrows at the name.

  “Didn’t you have some explaining you wanted to do?” Sarah sidestepped away from him and restacked some folders on her desk. “I don’t have all night. I have a new waitress to train and a bar to run.”

  “Damn, baby girl, you’re so sexy when you’re mad.” Josh flashed her a devilish grin and followed her when Sarah backed up.

  “Don’t start with the ‘baby girl’ crap. It’s not going to work.” Much. “You’ve got five minutes. Out with it.”

  Josh stood less than a foot from her, not letting Sarah put any decent amount of space between them. This close, she noticed the faint smudges of fatigue under his eyes.

  “All right. Truth is, Sarah, I didn’t leave because of our fight.”

  “Oh, really? So, why did you?”

  “I had…” His mouth tightened into a thin line. “I had a headache.”

  “What kind of headache? You said you only had twinges before. How bad was it?”

  Josh shook his head. “I didn’t want you to know about them.”

  “Why not? Headaches happen. It’s not like they’re girly or anything.”

  He threw in a self-conscious shrug. “That wasn’t why. I didn’t want to stay and have you see me like that.”

  “Did you think I would make that big of a fuss?” She wasn’t following. “I’ve witnessed headaches before.”

  “Not exactly. Not like this.” Josh rubbed at the back of his neck. “Since the accident, I get these headaches that are kinda like migraines on steroids. They sorta…incapacitate me.” He stared into her eyes, willing her to understand. “I didn’t want to be like that with you there.”

  “That’s why you ran out this morning?”

  “I usually get a warnin’ before an attack comes on. I’ll see a shimmer across my vision, or I’ll see a bright aura around things. When we were fightin’, I saw a shimmer right before it hit me.”

  “Can’t the doctors do anything? Isn’t there some kind of medicine that will help you? Maybe you should try a civilian doctor.”

  “No. It’s somethin’ I gotta live with for now, and I’m not gonna be dependent on prescription pills.”

  “What do you do for it when it happens?”

  “Take some pain reliever and try to get to a dark place. If I have enough warning, I’ll stick an ice bag on my head. The best thing to do is try to sleep it off, so I went back to my place.”

  “That’s why you were squinting! I thought you were mad, but the light was hurting your eyes, wasn’t it?”

  He gave a slight nod yes and looked away, obviously not wanting to admit to a weakness. Men.

  “Josh, you should have told me what was going on!” She closed the distance between them. “I thought you left because you were angry about our argument. I spent all day being mad at you!”

  He rolled a shoulder in resignation. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I had to get home while I could.”

  “Why would you drive in that condition? I could have taken care of you!”

  “I didn’t want you to feel like you
had to.”

  “Had to?” She shoved at his chest, and he went back a few steps. “Feeling sorry for you has nothing to do with it either! If you’re hurt, I want to be there for you because I care!” Sarah gathered steam and shoved him again until he was sitting against the desk. She knew that she was only moving him because Josh was allowing it. “How often do you get these headaches?”

  There went another nonchalant shrug. “A few times a week. Sometimes more, sometimes less.”

  “Honestly?”

  “Yes.” Sarah narrowed her eyes at him and waited until he admitted, “Sometimes more usually wins.”

  “Don’t you think I would have found out eventually?” If they were going to keep seeing each other, another headache was bound to pop up.

  He let out a frustrated breath. “I wasn’t really thinkin’ at all. The last couple of days, I’ve been fine, so I figured that maybe they were gettin’ better.”

  If there was more, Sarah wanted to hear it all. “What else don’t I know?” A heartrending thought came to her, and her throat felt like it was closing up. “Oh my God! Are you dying? Is that why you came back to Madison Falls? Will these kill you?”

  His eyes widened in surprise. “No, Sarah, nothin’ like that. I’m not dyin’. They put me out of commission for a while, and when it’s over, I’m good as new.”

  Josh wasn’t meeting her gaze.

  “What else?”

  She stood in between the V of his legs and rested her hands on top of his thighs. He scrubbed his hands over his face. “Sometimes, I get nightmares.”

  “About the explosion?”

  He nodded. “I can’t really remember much about what happened. In my dreams, I get flashes and sometimes I see the bomb and think I can stop it.” He stared at his feet. “Nothing sexy about sleepin’ with a man who wakes up screamin’. It’s hard to woo a woman if she thinks you’re a basket case. I didn’t mean to fall asleep last night. I was gonna leave in case I had another dream.”

  “Is that all?” Her fingers involuntarily squeezed into the tight muscles in his quads.