by Rita Hestand
Reverend Daniels put his chubby hands behind him and twiddled them as he continued to pace a bit before speaking. The preacher needed time to think the situation through. “Yet, even though you had to bring her in, you were still in love with her, after knowing who she was?”
“Yes, sir. I can’t explain it so it makes sense, but she was a young girl, barely getting by, and trying to live on her own. Struggling with it, too. What she did
wasn’t right, but she wasn’t fully aware of the consequences either. Not until I took her in. She was just a sweet kid, trying to keep a roof over her head. And until I came along, she was innocent.”
Reverend Daniels nodded. “I see. Well, it is often believed that to marry a black is to marry a descendent of Cain, and that if a child is born of this marriage that it would be inferior and mistreated by others as such. In other words, my religion as per se believes that the mark of Cain after he slew his brother was to be a black man. And that to be a black man was a condemnation from God himself. It is a theory of course, an interpretation of sorts that cannot be proven.
Not all churches believe this. I, myself, have my doubts. I feel as though God loves all his people, or he wouldn’t have put them on this earth. However, some say the apple represented sex. That would mean that God condemned sex on earth. And I do not believe that he did. For he told every animal and man to be fruitful and multiply. I believe that sex is the very reason God made woman for man.
“That being said, what I am trying to tell you is that my own church would frown upon this union. As would most of the congregation. It isn’t fair, it isn’t right, but it is the truth. Most people would frown upon it. Still, I cannot judge you, Jesse. You’ve come here, face to face to ask me honestly, and I appreciate that. However, you aren’t asking the church, you are asking me. It is my decision and my choice.”
Jesse nodded. “I figured as much. But where in the Bible does it say that God only loved white people? Or that one people should not love another? Cain went out and knew his wife. Did God condemn their marriage? Who was she? So many unanswered questions.”
“Point taken. I like you, Jesse. You know the Bible, don’t you?”
“I ought to. My mama shoved it down my throat enough.” Jesse smiled
meekly. “Beggin’ your pardon, sir.”
Reverend Daniels studied Jesse a long time. “Your mother was quite a lady, as I remember. But, don’t judge me so quickly, Jesse. I am a fair man, a God-fearing man, and you came here and said first that you love her. And for any marriage to
work, any marriage, it must have that one ingredient, no matter what. Because marriage is based upon it.”
He paused as though thinking while pacing. “Had you been a total stranger I might be tempted to refuse you. It certainly won’t make me popular. However, I knew your father and brother. I know that your mother was a God-fearin’ woman because she dragged you and your brother here every Sunday until you were old enough to balk at the idea. I know you fairly well, and I’ve never once seen or heard you say anything about a woman in your life. Unlike a lot of young men growing up today, you have not been a carouser. That speaks well of you.
“It would lay heavy on my conscience if I refused you, you being in the war and serving the southern state of Texas as I have heard you did. It is an obligation to repay you in some way. I am sure you have seen much death and much sorrow. If I refuse to marry you, what will you do?”
Jesse shrugged. “Go somewhere else and get it done, I reckon.”
The reverend nodded. “I figured as much. Now, let me get this straight. You met and fell in love with your Maggie and you have a child by this same woman?”
“That’s correct. I know that it would not be a popular thing for a man like you to do. I realize that Maggie and I put the wagon before the horse, so to speak. I done asked for forgiveness for that. The way I figure it, worse has been done before. If anyone knew of my intention, they might treat you unfairly because of it. But I have to ask you, nonetheless.”
Again the reverend nodded. “You are correct. Even though it is legal, at the moment, it isn't an accepted thing by most people. You realize that marrying such a woman could cause any number of problems for you?”
“It already has, but I aim to do it. I also need to write a will that states that my land, should anything happen to me, whatever I have goes to Maggie and the baby, Abby. And if anything happens to her, it goes to the baby. I’d want you to keep the paper to give to the authorities in case of my death. If we both die, then I leave it in your hands to see that Abby always has a home. I’m her blood father, and I love her more than my life.”
The reverend stopped pacing and stared a long time at Jesse. “You love her enough to die for her and the baby?”
“I do, sir!”
“Remarkable, just remarkable!” The preacher shook his head and smiled like a cherub. “Because I realize you know what you are saying, and the gravity of it, I cannot do anything but admire your courage.” The reverend nodded and went to get a cigar out of a carton he kept them in. He offered one to Jesse, but Jesse shook his head. In that moment Jesse realized how honored he should feel as the reverend rarely offered anyone one of his imported cigars.
“If I marry you, it will have to be in a private ceremony, in my chambers. No one needs to know unless there is some legal issue, right?”
“That’s right. It’s no one’s business. However, some might assume that I am living in sin,” Jesse said with a cough. “And the doc was invited, along with the Jenkins family.”
The reverend rolled his eyes. “Naturally they will assume she just lives with you, and it is to your discretion to let them know you are legally married. Since the war’s over, it would be legal. Not a popular thing to do, of course. But legal.
And for now and that’s all that matters.”
“I understand.” Jesse nodded solemnly.
“Freed slaves may marry who they please at the moment. However, I must warn you, it could change, especially the way people think down here. You could have problems, solve them, and it could start right back up. I’m sure you’ve weighed all this heavily.” There was a gleam in the reverend’s eye, and he studied Jesse for a quiet moment. “I will marry you, sir. You will bring her through the back way, on Saturday evening, and I will marry you. I ask you to come through the back, not because she is less a person, but because it will make a more peaceful day for all of us. However, I have one condition. I want to know the story behind this. Not just for my own curiosity, but for future reference should any legal problems arise, and should you come up dead.”
Jesse nodded and began telling him the whole story. The reverend smiled a time or two, frowned a time or two, and chuckled even, but his eyes were sad, too.
“Jesse, are you sure you aren’t marryin’ her out of regrets and guilt? I mean, you admitted you turned her in.”
“I’m positive. I love her, I didn’t want to turn her in, sir, but it was my duty, and she was guilty. She paid the price. Now, she’s free like the rest. But I love her, and I have since I met her. I have never loved a woman like I love Maggie.”
“And you realize of course that you, her, or even the baby could be killed before it’s all over?”
“I realize it.” Jesse nodded. “But we aren’t going to die before it’s our time, and there isn’t a thing we can do when it is our time.”
“She must be some woman. For legal purposes and to try and keep things calm, I’d like the sheriff to be your witness.” The reverend chuckled and shook hands with Jesse.
Jesse squirmed but nodded. “All right. Tucker’s a good man. I trust him.”
“Good, then bring her around to my chambers. There is a back door to the church. Come through there, and it’s the first room on the left. The sheriff and I will be waiting.”
“I appreciate you agreeing to do this. I hope I’m not putting you in harm’s way.”
“God takes care of me, Jesse, and I’ll pray he does the same f
or you and your…family.”
“Thanks, I appreciate it. Saturday at what time, sir?”
“My morning is full,” he began.
“How about six in the evening? Most folks take their dinner at that time. Less likely to be interrupted or found out.”
The reverend beamed. “Jesse, I have always found you a loner, a man that asks little of his fellow man. An honest, hard-working man. But today, I find you not only intriguing, but pretty heroic, too.”
“Thanks, I guess.” Jesse looked surprised. “But I don’t deserve any medals. I just want to do what’s right for us. Live my life happily on my own place.”
The reverend nodded and put his cigar down. “Then I’ll see you on Saturday at six in the evening.”
“See you Saturday.”
Jesse put his hat back on and left, feeling one burden off his shoulders.
Chapter Eight
“You did what?” Maggie gasped when Jesse returned that evening and she was fixing supper. “I can’t believe it. Why would you do such a thing?”
Jesse barely looked at her. “My rules, remember?”
Maggie fried the bacon that Mr. Jenkins had sent and inhaled the lovely aroma, then looked at Jesse. He hadn’t changed much in the past two and half years. He was still just as handsome, maybe more so, for he had grown muscles and widened. His hair was still a thick beautiful mass of black, combed high on his head, his eyes still a crystal blue. Every time she looked at him, she wanted him a little more, but she had learned to temper her wants. She learned it the hard way. Maggie knew most white men would never offer marriage, but Jesse insisted on it. Her heart swelled at the notion.
Maggie firmed her lips in a solid frown. “And you actually found someone who would do it?” The outrage in her voice didn’t match the beats of her heart. Her heart pounded with an excitement she couldn’t deny. She would soon be married to this man, the man she still loved more than anything on earth, except his child.
But the secret had to remain with her. Somehow, she would release him from this bond if the time came. Yet, in that moment, she felt more elated and proud than she’d ever felt before.
“Reverend Daniels. He’s a local. He’s known me and my family a long time.
Anyway, marriage between blacks and whites is legal for the time being. They call it a Reconstruction and Lincoln himself freed you. What it all means, is that he will marry us, in private of course, so we don’t cause a stir. Because like it or not, there are a lot of people who won’t care for us living together. Whether it’s in sin or not. So Saturday around six in the evening we will be married. Hope you have something to be married in,” Jesse said with quiet clarity.
“Of all the things you’ve done, this is the most stupid,” Maggie exclaimed, banging a skillet on the counter, all the while a pride building inside her that this man meant exactly what he said. It was hard to battle herself. On one hand, being
Jesse’s wife made her giddy with happiness, but on the other, the stark reality was, no one would appreciate it but them.
Jesse shrugged. “Maggie, I told you that I’d abide by your rules, but only if you abide by mine. From your own mouth you said it was just a piece of paper. So it shouldn’t make that big a matter to you.”
“It doesn’t allow you the right to touch me.”
“No, it doesn’t. I’m not in the habit of touching women who don’t want to be touched,” Jesse argued. “Until I’m invited, I’ll have to suffer living with you.”
Maggie clammed up, unable to argue the point further. She made the baby some soft scrambled eggs and bread and butter. Abby ate and smiled when Jesse let her down to play. She clapped her hands.
“She’s a good baby.”
“Takes after her mother.” Maggie chuckled.
Jesse looked at the butter. “Well, you’ve been busy today. It looks great.
Nothing like real butter to make things taste good again.”
Maggie didn’t want to admit it, but she was perhaps more proud of that statement than any other he’d made since he’d been back. She had worked hard all day, churning the butter until it was just right, and squeezing the liquid out, and then molding it into shape. She salted it to perfection and for a first time effort she was proud. Her mother could make the best butter.
“Yeah, if only we had a place to keep it cool so it would stay good. Guess I’ll have to make it a lot, ‘cause Abby shore likes it and so do you.”
“We’ve a place for it. It’s a little unhandy, but it will keep the butter for some time.” Jesse smiled.
“Where?” Maggie asked with a frown.
“The creek. You can follow me after supper, and I’ll show you,” Jesse said with a smile.
“All right.” Maggie shrugged. She learned to do new things everyday, enjoyed learning. However, she didn’t let on to Jesse that it pleased her.
When they finished eating, she tucked the baby into bed and once assured she was asleep, she returned to ask about the special place for butter. Jesse smiled.
“Follow me.”
They walked a good ways to the creek where several willows crowded the banks to shade it from the sun. The water trickled over rocks and ran steadily as though fed from a river.
Jesse turned to look at her. “Hand me the butter.”
She handed it to him. He slid it off the tin plate and into a glass jar with a wide mouth, put a lid on it and screwed it tight. Then, after tying a long string about it, he dropped it in the water.
“Won’t water get in?”
“Nope, it has a rubber seal that prevents that.” Jesse smiled at her. “It’s a new invention. Found that jar and a few others while fightin’ the Federals. I have to admit, there is a heap of things you can learn from the Federals, if you are open to it. They call ’em Mason jars.”
He turned to look at her and was surprised at her open mouth stare.
“How…how did you know to do that? Putting it in the spring like that to keep it cooled off.”
Jesse smiled, this time a real relaxed smile that took Maggie’s breath away.
“Mr. Jenkins taught me. He’s a Swede, from an old country in Europe. He’s taught me a lot of tricks. He said in time he’d figure out a better method, but since Texas only gets a limited amount of snow, this would do. And it does.”
“That’s brilliant, except you have to walk a mile to get the butter when you need it,” she grumbled.
“True, but you won’t have to make it every day.”
She shrugged. “You’re right. I am going to have to meet this Mr. Jenkins. He is one smart man.”
Jesse looked at her and smiled again. “I’ll introduce you next time we go.
Would you like me to make you a wagon so you can roll your stuff from the creek back?”
“A small pull wagon would be nice. Abby can play with it as she gets bigger, too. That would be fun for her. I can’t believe she takes to this place so easy. It’s hot and miserable most of the time, but she loves going outside and playing in the yard.”
“Yeah, and that bonnet is a good thing, too. Might not hurt for you to make one for yourself. Most of the women about wear them.”
Maggie looked at him strangely. “Maybe so. Used to have an old flop hat.
Guess I left that back in Arkansas.”
“The doc said to keep a bonnet on her head so she don’t get any more
earaches.”
“A bonnet…well, I’m no baby though.”
“Depends on who you ask.” He smiled seductively at her. “I love you, Maggie.”
Jesse said it so quietly, she wondered if she heard right.
“You shouldn’t say such a thing.” Maggie caught her breath.
Jesse watched her. “It pleases me that Abby likes it here. I hope in time you’ll grow to like it too.”
“When hell freezes over.” Maggie almost smiled, almost looked into those indigo eyes and confessed her undying love for this man.
He firmed his lips and didn’t
say anymore for a while. But as the sun began to set, he pulled her closer and pointed to the multi-colored sunset. “Something awful nice about this time of day, Maggie.” Jesse sighed.
Maggie watched the magnificent sunset and tried to remain unmoved, but his hand reached to gently touch hers, and she felt herself thawing a little more.
They watched the water in silence for a while, listening to the gurgle. Maggie took her shoes off and stuck her feet in for a minute to cool off. Then she put her shoes back on and stood up once more. “I’ll be bathing of the mornings before Abby gets up. You keep your eyes away, you hear me?”
She watched his eyes widen and his lips curl, but he didn’t say anything.
“When winter comes, if we get snow, I’ll fix a barrel in the back of the smokehouse and fill it with snow so you won’t have to go so far.” Jesse’s eyes took on a faraway look.
“I wish I had some more of those Mason jars. Come late spring they’d be handy for puttin’ up vegetables and fruits.” Maggie turned to look at him.
“Then we’ll get more.” Jesse nodded.
For once their conversation didn’t move around each other, and it put them at ease.
“I’d like to make a big garden so we have most things we need without having to buy them,” she began, hoping she wasn’t being too presumptuous. Still, he had said they’d be married, and the way she had him figured, he wasn’t the kind of man to leave a woman and child. Besides, as proud as he was of Abby, she couldn’t imagine him ever leaving, unless he were killed. That prospect bothered her. She hadn’t come for that, but it was a real possibility. She wondered if she really had a right to put his life on the line. What would she do if Jesse were killed? The thought sent a chill through her, and she visibly shuddered.
He stared at her a long time. “Something wrong?”
“No, no, I’m fine,” she lied.
“We can trade Jenkins for a lot of things we need,” Jesse added. “The man rarely goes to town. He grows almost everything on his farm.”
