Dear Maggie

by Brenda Novak

  Mntnbiker: Maggie?

  Zachman: Yeah?

  Mntnbiker: I wouldn’t try the naked thing, if I were you.

  SO NOW HE WAS GAY? He didn’t respond to that one kiss, and now he was gay?

  Nick unplugged his laptop and put it in its carrying case, then stretched out on Maggie’s bed, staring at the wallpaper that had been partially stripped from the wall. She’d said she could run around stark-naked and he wouldn’t notice.

  He’d like to see her try that. It would certainly be a quick way to learn what his appetites and preferences really were.

  Except then he’d feel terrible when he left her for Utah. Even worse than he did now, what with his e-mail deception.

  Who would’ve thought, when he took this assignment, that protecting a female journalist would be so difficult? Why did Maggie have to be different from every other woman he knew? She couldn’t even cooperate with him enough to provide the information he needed on the Fillmore letters. He’d tried asking her as Nick; he’d tried as John. And he’d gotten very little either way.

  He didn’t like her, he decided. He was eager to get back home.

  But that didn’t make him feel any better. Probably because he knew, deep down, that if he didn’t like her it was only because he liked her too much. As for wanting to go home, it was only because he was afraid that if he didn’t leave soon, he never would.

  “Damn,” he said, angry at anything and everything without really knowing why. Picking up his cell phone, he dialed Mendez.

  “What now?” the detective demanded when he finally answered.

  Nick ignored him. “You getting any leads from the composite?”

  “None that are panning out. And none that I haven’t already told you about. You woke me up to ask me that?”

  “No. There’s an article coming out in the paper tomorrow. I want you to read it, then call Maggie Russell and see what you can get out of her.”

  “Oh, sure. I’ve been so helpful to her. She’ll probably tell me everything.”

  Nick smiled grudgingly at the sarcasm because it fit his mood so well. “That was before. Now you’re going to tell her lots of things—like the fact that we believe the murderer is driving a blue Geo Metro. You’re going to confirm the connection between the murders and you’re going to send her a copy of the coroner’s report on Marge Brown. Then you’re going to persuade her to tell you where you can get hold of the Fillmore letters.”

  “And if I can’t get these…what did you call them? Fillmore letters?”

  “You will. If she won’t reveal her source—it’s a woman who works at the Independent, by the way—see if she can convince her to come forward. I think Maggie will do what she can. Just get me those letters.”

  Mendez sighed in obvious frustration. “I’m completely lost.”

  “You won’t be in the morning,” Nick said and hung up.

  “MAAAGGGIIIE…Maaagggiiee…where are you Maggie? This is Dr. Dan. You remember me, don’t you? I saw you at the grocery store last night. When you were buying some condoms to go with your brownies. Nice mix, by the way. Did you put it all to good use?”

  Another message! Maggie stood in her kitchen gripping the phone so hard it hurt. Dr. Dan had been following her last night. He’d been there the whole time. He even knew what she’d bought!

  She took a deep breath and bent over so she wouldn’t be sick as the rest of his message played in her ear. “I could help you out with the party, you know. I could satisfy you permanently, and I’m tempted, believe me. Especially after that article you wrote today. You made it sound like I was trying to make the police look bad. But they don’t need my help, Maggie. I think you’re getting your facts confused, just like Lola did. Our police system is filled with a bunch of bumbling idiots, and it’s time the public knows. I’ve sent you another letter, stating the facts. You’ll probably get it tomorrow. I suggest you print it. Otherwise, I might take offense.”

  Oh, God. This pervert, this homicidal maniac, had fixated on her, just like he had on Lola Fillmore. Only he was leaving her messages and sending her letters, which was worse. Somehow messages seemed far more intimate….

  Straightening, Maggie pulled her robe tighter as her eyes flicked from window to window. Her voice mail system was asking her to save or delete Dr. Dan’s message, but she couldn’t move. She wasn’t even sure she’d heard all of it. Was he out there right now? Watching her?

  Maybe he’d seen her step onto the porch to retrieve the paper a few minutes ago. She’d wanted to see her article and had found it on the front page. But then she’d made the mistake of checking her voice mail, and Dr. Dan’s most recent message had stolen all her joy. What was she going to do? What would happen to Zach if the police didn’t catch Dr. Dan before he got her?

  Suddenly Maggie wanted to see Zach more than she’d ever wanted to see anyone before. She wanted to hug him close and know that she’d be there to take care of him until he was a man and could take care of himself.

  Nick came around the corner, dressed in a pair of long cargo shorts and a T-shirt, his hair still wet from a recent shower. When Maggie had gotten home, she’d found him asleep in her bed. “What is it, Maggie?” he asked now. Obviously, the look on her face had given her away.

  Maggie opened her mouth to tell him about the message, then remembered what it said. She didn’t want Nick to know she was buying condoms. She didn’t want anyone to know.

  Her finger hovered over the delete button. Surely there wasn’t anything in this new message that could help the police. Dr. Dan had used the same false, raspy voice. He’d said similar things.

  But if she deleted his message, she’d be doing what Lola Fillmore had done. She’d be keeping evidence from the police because it made her look bad. And they needed everything they could get on this guy….

  With a grimace, she saved the message and hung up. Then she forced a smile for Nick. “I want to see Zach,” she said. “I’m going over to Mrs. Gruber’s to get him.”

  Nick watched her for a moment without saying anything. Finally he nodded. “Okay. I was just about to mow the lawn. Mower’s in the shed, right?”

  Maggie glanced through the window overlooking the backyard, wondering if Dr. Dan had ever attacked a man. He could hit Nick over the head when Nick least expected it, or stab him from behind….

  “Yeah, but be careful,” she said.

  “Be careful?” he repeated.

  “Just keep your eyes open.”

  “Maggie, you’re not making any sense.” He reached toward her to do something—Maggie wasn’t sure what; clasp her hands?—but that simple motion was all the invitation she needed to melt into him. She buried her face in his shoulder, breathing in the wonderful clean scent that was Nick, and felt his arms go around her.

  “Something’s upset you,” he said in her ear. “Tell me what it is.”

  Maggie shook her head. She didn’t want to talk about it. She just wanted to feel safe.

  “Please don’t let go,” she whispered. “Give me a minute.”

  “Maggie?”

  She didn’t answer. His hands were on her back, massaging their way slowly up her spine and pressing her against him.

  “Maggie,” he said again, only this time her name sounded more like a groan. And the next thing she knew, he was kissing her. She wasn’t sure if she’d put her mouth to his or if he’d initiated the contact; more likely they’d come together at the same time. In any case, they were both active participants, which probably wasn’t a good thing. Hadn’t she just told John Nick was gay?

  Ah, but a kiss had never felt so good. One of Nick’s hands was clutching her hair, the other cupped her bottom, making her unavoidably aware of his complete arousal. Someone was even moaning. God, was that her?

  Nick lifted his head and smiled. “Let’s see what’s under here,” he said, tugging on the belt of her robe.

  While Maggie was still trying to decide whether or not to let this go any further, the robe parted
, revealing the only piece of lingerie she owned. A short bone-colored nightie with thin straps, it had small triangles of fabric that covered her nipples while leaving the rest of her breasts exposed to his view.

  “Wow, where did you get this little number?” he asked with frank appreciation.

  “Darla gave it to me for Christmas. It was one of her broad hints that I need to spice up my life.” Maggie wanted him to touch her. She thought she might go crazy while she waited, feared she’d shrivel up and die if he never did.

  His breath whistled through his teeth. “Definitely works for me,” he said and slipped a hand underneath her nightie. Starting at her thigh, he moved slowly upward until he reached her panties, then slipped inside them, too, and stroked her bottom.

  If such a simple touch could make her feel breathless, Maggie wondered what it would be like to hold Nick naked and sliding against her, the springy hair on his chest rubbing her breasts. The mental image brought a flood of heat—and a twinge of guilt. What about John?

  “I thought we were just friends. I thought you’d set certain boundaries on our relationship that we weren’t going to cross,” she said, but she wasn’t able to infuse her voice with any censure.

  “I did,” he responded. “For instance, I’d never do this.” His hand relinquished her bottom and moved along the indentation at her waist and up over her ribs toward her breasts, where he cupped the fullness of each one before gently teasing her nipples. “Or this,” he added, lowering his head to take one, then the other into his mouth over the thin fabric of her nightie.

  A spurt of pleasure shot through Maggie, the likes of which she’d never experienced before, heightening her need. She wanted far more from Nick Sorenson than a little bit of touching and kissing, and she knew it. She was afraid he knew it, too.

  “It’s a good thing,” she replied, “because I wouldn’t let you.” Then she threaded her fingers into his hair and dragged him back for another mind-numbing kiss.

  “See?” he said against her mouth several seconds later. “We’re on the same page here.”

  “Right.” Breathless and giddy and far beyond the point of refusal as his hands roved possessively over her, she closed her eyes and let him sweep her away. She’d think about the consequences later, afterward…After he’d stopped the dull ache that was beginning to throb inside her.

  “I’m glad we’re not doing anything we agreed we wouldn’t,” she said.

  Pushing her robe off her shoulders, he kissed along her collarbone and then nipped her neck. “I can’t get close enough to you,” he whispered, more serious now than she’d ever seen him. “Let me make love to you, Maggie.”

  She murmured something. It might have been assent. It certainly wasn’t a denial. She was afraid the entire world would stop spinning if he let her go now. In any case, she was the one who dropped her robe to the ground, freeing her hands so she could slide them under his shirt and rake her nails along his back. “You feel so incredibly good,” she admitted. “This feels so good.”

  “It gets better,” he promised. “I want to show you, Maggie. I want to hear you gasp and moan with pleasure and beg me for more, and I want to give it to you over and over and over….”

  Oh, boy! Darla was right. Nick was good at this, far better than Maggie had ever imagined. He made her feel as though she was the only woman in the world, made her heart pound so hard she feared it would leap out of her chest.

  His eyes intent on what he was about to reveal, he started working the straps of her nightie off her shoulders when the front door banged open and a child’s voice sang out, “Mommy! I picked s-s-some flowers-s-s for you!”

  Zach! Panic gripped Maggie. She bent and grabbed her robe, and Nick hurried to help her cover herself before her son, followed closely by a tongue-lolling Rambo, charged into the kitchen.

  “Mommy, Mommy, look! I picked you s-s-some flowers-s-s.” Zach handed her several dandelions and smiled proudly, completely unaware of what had been happening only seconds earlier. But Mrs. Gruber, who came in behind the dog, wasn’t so easily fooled.

  “Must be hotter in here than I thought,” she said, giving them both the once-over. “You’re all sweaty.”

  Nick’s eye caught Maggie’s for a brief second. “Not as sweaty as we wanted to be,” he grumbled and headed out the back door.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  “IF I LET YOU LISTEN to Dr. Dan’s new message, will you promise me the contents will not be revealed? To anyone?” Maggie asked, staring intently at Detective Mendez, who was sitting on the couch across from her. Nick had finished his work in the yard an hour or so earlier. He’d come in long enough for them to have a brief, whispered discussion in the hallway—Mrs. Gruber was still in the house, cleaning the fridge—about the mistake they’d nearly made, how fortunate they were that Zach had arrived when he did, and how they wouldn’t let the same thing happen again. Then he’d left the house to run some errands. Maggied prayed he’d be gone a good long while. After the incident in the kitchen, and their awkward conversation afterward, she didn’t particularly want to spend the day in Nick’s company. More importantly, she didn’t want him showing up while Mendez was around, asking uncomfortable questions. The condoms were her business. She planned to keep it that way, which was why she’d puposely waited to contact the police until Mrs. Gruber had gone home, and why she’d hurried Darla away when she’d come over to apologize for falling asleep the night before.

  Mendez hesitated. “I don’t understand. Now that I know about the tape, you can’t really keep it from me. It’s evidence. I can subpoena—”

  “I know. There’s no need to become adversarial. I’m just asking for a little bit of human kindness and compassion here, okay?”

  His brows drew together. “Why?”

  “You’ll see,” she said, hoping Rambo and the modeling clay she’d given Zach to play with in his room would keep him busy for the duration of the detective’s visit. “Dr. Dan says something that…well, that’s sort of embarrassing, and I want to be sure you’re going to handle it in a mature way, despite the fact that we’ve never been very good friends.”

  Mendez blinked in surprise, an appropriate reaction, Maggie thought, but he also seemed a little relieved, which was a reaction she hadn’t expected. “Let me get this right. You’re asking me for a favor?”

  Why did he seem to like the idea of that so much? “I’m asking you to be discreet.”

  “You got it. I’ll be as discreet as you want me to be, provided you understand that I’ll have to share whatever’s on that tape with Hurley and some of the other members of the force.”

  Everyone down at the station was probably going to have a great laugh at her expense, Maggie realized, but there was an investigation in progress. Mendez couldn’t promise her any more than what he had, and she knew it. Still she held out some hope that…“The other members of the force you just mentioned—that doesn’t include dispatchers, does it? Or anyone who might leak the information to…other reporters?”

  “Reporters?” He smiled and shook his head. “Especially if you can see your way clear to doing me a favor in return.”

  A feeling of unease crept over Maggie. Mendez needed something from her, and she’d just given him the leverage he needed. That was why he seemed so happy. “What kind of favor?” she asked.

  “Those letters you wrote about in the paper today? The ones Dr. Dan sent to Lola Fillmore? I need to get a copy of the first three.”

  “And you think I can give them to you?”

  “I think you can get them.”

  “I can’t reveal my source.”

  “Then talk your source into coming forward. Now let me hear that message, because afterward you’ll want to start making some notes. Now that we’re cooperating with each other, I’ve got a few things you might be interested in hear-ling for your next article on Dr. Dan.”

  NICK SAT IN HIS APARTMENT, irritated and grumpy and rubbing his temples to get rid of the headache that had plag
ued him ever since he’d left Maggie’s house. The laser copies of the pictures she’d sent John were all around him, and drew his eye again and again, constant reminders of the intimacy they’d nearly shared only hours ago. Her smiling face added to his longing, increased his frustration. Yet he couldn’t bring himself to take the pictures down. He wanted them exactly where they were because he wanted Maggie, which didn’t exactly build his confidence that he’d be able to behave more professionally in the future than he had in the past. NICK SAT IN HIS APARTMENT, irritated and grumpy and rubbing his temples to get rid of the headache that had plagued him ever since he’d left Maggie’s house. The laser copies of the pictures she’d sent John were all around him, and drew his eye again and again, constant reminders of the intimacy they’d nearly shared only hours ago. Her smiling face added to his longing, increased his frustration. Yet he couldn’t bring himself to take the pictures down. He wanted them exactly where they were because he wanted Maggie, which didn’t exactly build his confidence that he’d be able to behave more professionally in the future than he had in the past.

  Dammit! He was an FBI agent working on a life-and-death assignment, and all he could think about was getting his hands up Maggie’s shirt. What was wrong with him? How had he lost his focus? Where was his self-discipline?

  Concentrate, he ordered himself. He had to read through Mendez’s report on the leads that had been generated by the composite they’d circulated in the papers. Mendez had checked them out and claimed they were all dead ends, but Nick wanted to go over them again, just to be sure. And he needed to comb through the sworn statements Mendez and Hurley had collected on Marge Brown. The quicker he assimilated the information they’d gathered, the quicker he could put a stop to Dr. Dan. Nick was angry now, angry that Dr. Dan thought he could kill at will, that he thought he could terrorize Maggie…Nick wasn’t going to let him get away with it. He would catch Dr. Dan if it was the last thing he did, and he would do it soon. For Maggie and all the other women who might be at risk. And for the families and friends of those who’d been killed so they could receive the closure they deserved. Especially Marge Brown’s husband, Jeff. Evidently, he and Marge had argued the night of her murder. She’d stormed out of the house and never returned, and he’d been too proud to go after her. Now he was devastated that they’d never have the chance to reconcile, and Nick felt for him.