Chains of Command

by Lily Harlem

  Except it wasn’t a lookalike.

  Fuck.

  Dressed in combat gear, complete with helmet, dark streaks on his face and a gun slung over his shoulder, he was addressing the second doctor. His expression was one of concern and authority as he stood with his hands on his hips and his eyebrows pulled together.

  “Not fatal,” the doctor said. “From what I can tell.”

  “Jenna.” James touched her elbow. “More fluids, now. Then we’ll take this tourniquet off and find the bleeder.”

  “Er, yes, of course.”

  Forcing herself to react to the instructions, she grabbed a bag of saline. When she turned back to the room, Seb was gone.

  Was it even him?

  Her mind was playing tricks on her. Which was worrying, but she had no time to think about that now.

  As she worked Seb’s voice echoed in her ears. She set up fluid, then checked blood pressure and oxygen saturations. She spoke to the patient who was muttering and full of morphine.

  Auto-pilot had well and truly kicked in.

  What the hell was Seb doing in Iraq? Why hadn’t he told her he was a soldier in the British Army? And more to the point, what the heck was she going to do about it?

  Nothing!

  James found the bleeding vessels and stitched them up as Jenna kept the patient under close observation. She administered prophylactic antibiotics and kept an eye on his pedal pulse.

  Soon he was ready to move onto the ward.

  “You okay, Jenna?” James asked as he washed his hands.

  “Er, yes, fine.”

  “You seem a little … distracted.”

  “No, well, a bit. It’s hot in here. I wish they’d sort out the bloody air con.”

  “Tell me about it.” He nodded at the corridor. “Go and get a cold drink, cool off for a minute, the last thing we need is you dropping like a fly.”

  “I might take a quick break.”

  “Definitely take a break.” His voice was stern.

  Jenna was grateful for a moment alone, and dashed to the office where the air was a fraction cooler and the beep of the medical equipment dulled. She filled a glass of water and sipped it as she stared at the canvas wall.

  He’s here. He’s here.

  It was like a mantra in her brain. The words spinning around and around along with the image of Seb looking every bit as gorgeous as she remembered and then some. Damn it, the man was hot. All big and commanding and clearly a senior rank.

  A thrill went through her, but she quickly beat it down.

  It made no difference if he was in Iraq in the same camp as she was. They were both there to do a job, serve their Queen, there was no time for a relationship whether it was just hot sex or more.

  I’m not going to have hot sex with him. Ever.

  She frowned and reached for more water. Fraternizing when posted was frowned upon. It was too easy for both men and women to become distracted from the task at hand—distraction could be the difference between life and death.

  There was only one thing for it, she’d have to avoid him—either he was already doing that with her or he didn’t know she was on base. She’d bet money on the latter. He had no idea she was there. Which was to her advantage. She could take steps to dodge his line of sight. It was only for another eleven weeks. Then she’d be back in the UK and well away from the one man who’d managed to make her feel like shit after the best night of her life.

  Best night!

  Was she bigging up her memories or had it really been that good?

  Yes, it had really been that good.

  She finished her water and tossed the plastic cup in the bin. Drawing on her training, her soldier training, she puffed up her chest and steeled her resolve. Nothing would get in the way of caring for her patients, not even Sebastian whatever his name was.

  She went back to the ward and set about her duties. There was lots to do as well as keep up the spirits of the soldiers either recovering from minor wounds or waiting to head back to the UK for recuperation … or early retirement from the army.

  Before long, the end of her shift arrived. Although she’d mostly managed to push Seb and his sudden reappearance back in her life from her thoughts, the moment she stepped off the ward and into the desert heat, the reality of her situation rushed back.

  The camp was busy. Vehicles moving around, the hum of aircraft nearby, and shouts from soldiers doing a group workout with their commanding officers.

  She glanced around as she moved quickly toward her quarters. Just about everyone she looked at was in pale camo gear, so spotting one man was like finding a needle in a haystack. She hoped that she, too, would be a needle, though as females made up only five percent of the population within the high walls of camp, the reality of it was she stood out like a sore thumb.

  Sticking close to a large storage facility, she walked in the shadows. A group of soldiers jogged past her in a neat line, their breaths loud and sand puffing up around their feet. Each carried a heavy Bergen.

  She walked past the mess, the smell of cooking food for once not making her hungry.

  And then she saw him.

  He was talking to several soldiers, again with his hands on his hips. The conversation appeared intense but quickly ended. The soldiers saluted him, then walked away.

  Her throat dried, and her heart rate picked up. She couldn’t tear her gaze from him.

  Which was her downfall.

  Almost as if he’d felt the heat of her attention, he turned and faced her.

  She realized she’d come to a complete halt. Her only saving grace were the shadows. Perhaps he couldn’t see her clearly, especially as he had shades on.

  He removed his shades. His mouth hung open for a moment, and then he clamped it shut and frowned.

  Quickly she hurried on. If only she could get to the end of this pathway, then she’d be able to slip through to her quarters and stay there … for as long as possible.

  “Hey,” he called.

  She ignored him and sped up.

  “Wait.”

  Just as she reached the end of the tent a big hand clasped her shoulder. She had no choice but to stop.

  She closed her eyes, pulled in a deep breath, and turned.

  “Fuck, it is you.” He pulled off his helmet and ran his fingers through his sweat-damp hair. His face was still streaked with dust and camouflage. “I thought I was seeing things.”

  She was silent.

  “What the hell are you doing here?” he asked.

  “I could say the same to you.” She glared up at him.

  “Jenna, but I…” He shook his head.

  “You what? Neglected to tell me you’re a … a…” She pointed at his chest and read his badge. Major Sebastian Crawley. “That you’re a major in the British Army.”

  He held up his hands. “The same way you forgot to tell me you’re an officer.”

  She clamped her lips together. Her heart was thudding so fast she feared for its survival. So much for avoiding Seb. Now she was so close she could smell him—faded cologne, sweat and dirt. “I have to get going.”

  “You’ve been here a week?”

  “Yes, likely same as you, Major.”

  “So that’s why you were in Brize Norton, waiting for your posting.”

  She could almost see the cogs of his mind working.

  She gestured to her scrubs. “I’m gross, from work. I need to shower and change.” She took a step backward.

  “I… I mean, I’m…” He held out his hands.

  “Shocked to see me. Yes, I feel the same. One-night stands don’t usually bite you on the ass quite this painfully, huh.”

  “I didn’t mean that, it’s not painful to see you.”

  Damn it. It hurt her. To know he hadn’t wanted to see her again yet here they were, stuck in the middle of the bloody desert together.

  “Goodbye, sir.” She gave a quick salute and rushed away. The minute she turned the corner she blew out a breath. Her bell
y was tight and she hoped she wouldn’t be sick.

  What the hell was she going to do?

  Chapter Seven

  Jenna showered, then emailed her parents to say hi, read a few pages of a book, then paced her small pod.

  Despite feeling queasy, she was hungry. She’d have to go to the canteen and eat, it was that or fill up on the chocolate stash she had in her bedside cupboard, but that was for emergencies.

  This is an emergency.

  She opened the cupboard door and stared at the bars of Cadbury Dairy Milk her mother had sent her. Much as she loved it, after a day on the ward it wasn’t going to be a substitute for dinner. The ward, should she go there? Perhaps find a sandwich—there was usually one going spare. But then she’d likely get dragged into working, and she’d done ten hours already.

  There was only one thing for it, and that was to go to the mess. Usually she’d eat with Isabel, but she was on chaperone duty. Perhaps Marie would be there, or one of the other girls she was getting to know on the ward.

  She glanced at her watch, wondering what time Seb would be in the canteen. He was late evening the day before, hopefully he’d be the same tonight.

  Making a quick decision, she dragged on a fleeced hoody and slipped outside. The air was cooling and sand hung like a fog over the setting sun.

  The canteen was noisy as usual, and with her head low, she joined a queue of loud squaddies who were dissecting a mission to a local village. They’d come under fire and it had been their commander who’d led them all to safety.

  The dinner options were curry or pasta bake so she settled on curry, grabbed a chunk of bread, then looked for a seat. A group of senior ranking soldiers sat in their usual section, but she couldn’t see Seb.

  Hoping she’d timed it right, she found a spare table, sat alone, and turned her back on the canteen. She’d eat quickly and then dash back to her quarters. Then the next day, on the ward, she’d be safe from him. It was just the evenings she had to avoid contact. But with Isobel back soon, she’d have a wingman at least.

  “Mind if I sit here?” Seb didn’t wait for an answer. He slid a tray holding a huge plate of curry onto the table and took a seat on the bench opposite her.

  Jenna stared at him, her fork halfway to her mouth.

  “The curry is usually good,” he said, tugging off his peaked cap and setting it aside. His face was clean now, he’s obviously showered, shaved too.

  Of all the nerve.

  “I’m suddenly not hungry.” She placed down her fork, grabbed her tray and stood. If he hadn’t got the hint earlier that she didn’t want to be in his company, surely this would get it into his brain.

  He frowned. “Sit down.”

  “I have somewhere else to be.”

  His jaw tensed and he narrowed his eyes. “Sit.”

  “No, I’ve-”

  “That was not a request, soldier, it was an order.” His voice was low and deep, as if daring her to disobey him.

  An order!

  She stared into his eyes as her blood heated. The man had no boundaries. He couldn’t tell her what to do.

  Except he damn well could.

  “I outrank you,” he said in a quiet but decidedly dangerous tone. “So sit the hell down … now.”

  Her palm itched with the desire to slap him across his cheek. A bloom of heat grew in her chest. It was a combination of anger, intense irritation, and indignation. It kept on getting hotter and hotter.

  “Now.” It was barely a word he’d said it so quietly.

  She sat, banging her tray against the melamine, then folded her arms and sat back.

  He glanced left and right, then picked up his fork and speared a chunk of chicken. “Eat your food.” He shoved it into his mouth.

  “I told you, I’m not—”

  “Eat.”

  She huffed and picked up her fork, shoveled in a mouthful of dinner.

  “Surely we can be civilized about this,” he said in a hushed voice so no one could overhear.

  “About what?”

  “The fact we’ve been intimate.” His gaze slid down the column of her neck.

  Is he going to undress me with his eyes?

  She hunched forward and beneath the table jiggled her knee. “It’s probably for the best if we forget about that night.”

  “This is where we have a problem.” He leaned a little closer. “Because I can’t forget it.”

  “You’ll have to.”

  “Why?”

  “Because that’s all it was. One night. We both got everything we wanted and that’s the end of it.”

  “It’s nice to hear you say that.”

  “What?”

  “That I gave you everything you wanted.” He took a sip from a glass of water and studied her over the rim.

  She copied his action and was glad of the cool fluid to dull the spice of the curry. That was why she was hot, not because of him. No way. “I don’t think we should mention it again. It isn’t professional.”

  “What isn’t professional is me sitting here wishing it was a week or so ago and you were mine, for a whole night, to do whatever I wanted to.” He paused. “You were crying out for it, you were crying out my name.”

  “You can’t turn back time, Seb.”

  His chin tilted slightly, as though her using his name without his rank had been a surprise. But why the hell should she when he was discussing her being naked and crying out for it?

  “That’s true.” He scooped in another mouthful of food.

  She glanced around. No one was taking any notice of them.

  “Though I would change one thing knowing what I do now,” he said.

  “What’s that?”

  “How I said goodbye.”

  She huffed. “Yeah, you were full of charm at that moment.”

  “I pissed you off, didn’t I?”

  “If you knew you were pissing me off, why do it?”

  “What would have been the point in asking for your number? I couldn’t have taken you out on a date for months. No woman, unless she’s married to a soldier, wants to wait that long.”

  “You could have still asked.”

  “And then never called.” He shrugged. “Wouldn’t that have been worse?”

  “It would have made me feel like you hadn’t just used me for sex.”

  It was his turn to glance around, then he leaned forward. “I didn’t, not by a long shot. We had a connection.”

  “Yes, a hot, sweaty and naked connection.”

  A filthy grin tugged at his mouth. “We did, all of that, you’re right.”

  She frowned and carried on with her dinner. Memories of the night flashed through her brain. The way he’d pinned her to the wall and delivered her first orgasm of the evening with his tongue. How he’d made the bed frame clatter against the wall as he’d found his release. The way he’d slid his cock between her breasts, lost to the sensation of her flesh against his. And she’d slept so well, cocooned in his arms, listening to his breathing and feeling safe and warm.

  No wonder she’d felt safe, she’d been with a highly trained soldier. She just hadn’t known it.

  “So can I have it?” he said.

  “What?”

  “Your number, so when we get back I can take you out.”

  “No.” She huffed. “You had your chance, you didn’t take it.”

  “I didn’t have all the information.” He bit into his bread and chewed. “If I’d known you were military, too, I’d have known you understand deployment.” He shrugged. “You cheated me.”

  “I cheated you!” She bit on her bottom lip, realizing her voice had cranked up a notch.

  “Shh.” He frowned.

  She leaned forward. “I asked what you did, you said people management, risk assessment. I presumed you worked in HR.”

  “I’d say being responsible for a group of young guys on patrol in a war zone is people management and risk assessment.”

  She couldn’t argue with him. “Well �
�� you lied by omission.”

  “So did you.” He nodded in the direction of the hospital. “You said you were a nurse, not a nurse in the army.”

  “You didn’t ask.”

  “Touché.”

  She moved some rice around the plate. It was true, neither of them had been completely honest.

  “So when we get back to Blighty, we’ll hook up, yeah?” He set his cutlery on his empty plate.

  “I don’t think so.” She pushed her tray to one side. She’d had enough food. “It’s best if we accept the night at The Dog and Duck for what it was and move forward with our lives … separate lives.”

  He pressed his lips together and watched her stand.

  “Stay safe out there, Major.” She picked up her tray. “It’s a big bad world.” She turned and walked away.

  Her heart was pounding and her legs had a strange floaty feeling, as if they were tired but also ready for action. What she’d said was true. He’d had his chance to ask for her number. He hadn’t. Why should everything change because they were both stationed at the same camp?

  But damn, the guy was sexy as hell. She was surrounded by men, they were everywhere, many of them handsome, all of them tough and loyal. Yet Major Sebastian Crawley stood out amongst them. He was handsome in a deliciously unaware way. His body was made for fighting and for fucking. And that smile, whether it was because he was cracking a joke, being cocky or looking at her appreciatively, set lusty hormones racing around her system.

  She dumped her tray and headed outside. The sun had set and the camp was in near darkness.

  Luckily, she knew the way by heart back to her quarters and headed toward the shortcut she usually took between the supplies tent and the officer’s station.

  She’d have to tell Isabel about Seb when she came back to camp. But that was two days away. Perhaps she should email Melanie now and get her take on it. Melanie would be in agreement, she was sure, that Seb was one soldier who’d blown his chances, hot body and cute grin or not.

  “Oh!” Suddenly she was tugged to the left, into a small dark recess holding a side door to the storage facility. She raised her hand, ready to deliver a swift blow to her captor.

  “Jenna, stop.” Seb grabbed her wrist and stepped her backward.

  “What the hell are you doing?” Through the shadows she stared up at him as her back hit the wall. “Get off.” She tugged her arm.