The First Cut: A Dark Psychological Thriller (Gushers Series Book 1)

by Chuck Buda

  She held her knees to her chest and started explaining the book to him. Aiden wasn’t interested in Chekhov or any other classic literature for that matter. But he could listen to Leah for hours. She sounded so excited as she tried to describe a story about a woman with a dog and some banker was having an affair with her on vacation or something. Aiden watched Leah’s eyes dart back and forth along the wall behind him as her imagination swirled with the images of the tale she related. Aiden loved her eyes almost as much as the smell of her hair.

  Leah must have sensed Aiden’s lack of interest because she paused and chuckled to herself.

  “Sorry. I don’t want to bore you. I just finished reading the story so it is still fresh in my mind.” Leah blushed and stared at her bedspread.

  “I like listening to you.” He realized he sounded like he was smitten, so he rambled on to clarify. “I mean, I like listening to you tell the story.” He shook his head and rolled his eyes.

  Suddenly, Leah grabbed Aiden’s face and kissed him. It was fast and gentle. Only soft lips. They remained in touch for several moments, until she pulled away. Both of their dry lower lips stuck together for an extra second before peeling apart.

  Aiden was grateful for the immediate nature of the kiss. It took away the nervousness and the self-doubt. Their first kiss was over. And it was great.

  He tried to hide his smile but it spread even further. Leah giggled and looked away. She blushed and her cheeks reddened almost to the same hue as her hair.

  “Didn’t see that one coming, huh?” She chuckled again.

  “Uh, no. Well, I knew we would, just not so soon. Now. Now. Uh...” Aiden shut his mouth before he sounded more ridiculous.

  Leah laughed and shoved Aiden in his chest. He had to join in the laughter even though she pushed him very hard. He was surprised by her strength.

  “So, why did you do it?”

  “I wanted to get it out of the way.”

  Aiden winced. “Out of the way?”

  Leah nodded. “Well, if things progress in the hot tub like we think they will, I didn’t want to kiss you for the first time with everyone watching us. I wanted it to be more memorable.”

  Aiden agreed with her. He wanted so much more than a kiss but he was scared to push it. Not because of the timing. Because of her. He wanted Leah to feel comfortable with things, without feeling pressure from him or the group to make a move.

  They talked and laughed about their parents and the weird rules each set of parents imposed in their homes. Then they made their way downstairs to the den. Leah kicked her father out of the room. He had his newspapers spread out around him as he watched some golf tournament. Mr. Fisher made a joke about being thrown out of his own man-cave. He warned Aiden to beware of his future because no matter what he did, his future wife and daughter would overrule his wishes. He wished them a goodnight and gathered his papers to head upstairs.

  Aiden and Leah spent the rest of the evening watching The Road Warrior on television. The classic older movie was one of Aiden’s favorites. Leah said she liked it because Mel Gibson was still young and cute when the film was made. Aiden shrugged, knowing full well, he could never compete with Mel Gibson or Keanu Reeves or Brad Pitt. He was just Aiden.

  But he grinned to himself because he was sitting next to Leah. Not those other big names with even bigger bank accounts. He was the real winner. Aiden thought to himself, he didn’t care who Leah admired from afar as long she only invited him over to watch movies with her.

  While they watched the movie, Leah crept her hand over to his. Aiden smiled as they held hands on the couch.

  Chapter 24

  Holden went upstairs once Leah and Aiden kicked him out of the den. He had just gotten relaxed, reading his days-old newspapers and listening to the golf tournament in the background. Then he got bounced.

  He was used to getting brushed aside. The kids always took priority over his own needs. And Samantha seemed to keep him penned into smaller and smaller spaces these days. Their shared closet was now approaching an eighty/twenty split after starting at fifty/fifty. Before the kids were born, Holden had an office in one of the bedrooms. Little be little, he had been forced to enjoy more limited time and space. He often kidded Samantha that he would have to build a small shed in the backyard where he could escape to. Her response was, “Why don’t you set up in the basement?” Holden wouldn’t even consider making a man cave in the basement with all the millipedes and cobwebs. Basements were for storage, not for shooing unwanted husbands into.

  As he reached the top step his cell phone vibrated. A text message came through. Holden tucked the papers under his arm and glanced at the display.

  Rebecca.

  He cringed. Holden wasn’t thrilled she kept calling him at work and texting him. She was making it easier to slip up and let both her husband and Samantha know something was going on. When they first hooked up, they had both agreed upon no overt contact. Especially in writing. All their trysts were set up and confirmed via visual cues through the windows or passing messages through signals. Whenever Rebecca left a Don Quixote statue in her bedroom window, Holden knew it was safe to come over. Things like that were easy to mask, only decipherable by the folks on the inside. He knew one of these text messages would be seen by Samantha or Turner. Or they might hear it go off at a late hour like this and ask who it could be and what could they want.

  Holden ducked into the hallway bathroom. Samantha was reading a book in their room so he didn’t want to go in until he was sure Rebecca would lay low. Locking the bathroom door, Holden leaned against the sink and read the message.

  Did you talk to Samantha?

  Holden huffed. He sent her back a message telling Rebecca he spoke with Samantha. He told her Samantha was shocked by the request and he had suggested she talk to Rebecca. He waited while she typed back.

  YOU TOLD HER TO TALK TO ME???

  All caps signaled her alarm. Holden grinned at her anger. He typed back to her that he meant Samantha would ask Rebecca her feelings on it, in general. He wrote Rebecca should act surprised but encourage it as natural and healthy in strong marriages.

  Silence on the other end of the keyboard. Holden waited another minute. It appeared Rebecca was no longer responding so he hit the light switch and started to leave the bathroom. Just as he stepped into the hallway, the cell phone vibrated. He glanced at the display again.

  This is going to cost you.

  He smiled and went back into the bathroom. Holden locked the door and turned on the light. He typed how everything always cost him and he was used to it.

  I’m going to make you try something new.

  Holden felt his breath catch in his throat. He knew Rebecca was insatiable and they had done just about everything a man and a woman can do to each other sexually. What else could there be? He scratched his head and typed he couldn’t wait to serve his sentence.

  He watched the phone as he saw the dots indicating she was typing.

  Here is a little taste.

  A picture of Rebecca’s vagina popped up under her words. The sight made him instantly hard. The soft pink folds of flesh staring at his face, close to the camera made him want to run across the street and take her. He felt sweat bead upon his upper lip and the thought of masturbating in the bathroom crossed his mind. Strongly. But he didn’t want to get caught. He was in the kid’s bathroom and Tommy might knock on the door. Holden thought about saving the photo for future use before deleting it quickly. He typed back to Rebecca. He told her he had to put the phone down because Samantha wanted to spend time with him. It was a lie but Rebecca wouldn’t know. And hopefully she would stop texting him.

  Fine.

  Her response was terse. Holden deleted the strand of messages and turned his phone off. He splashed cold water on his face. The swelling in his pants subsided. Holden stared at himself in the mirror. The guilt resurfaced for what he continued to do behind his wife’s back. Samantha was so good to him and here he was running around
with the neighbor. He thought about how he would feel if the shoes were on the other foot and the devastation racked his conscience. Holden never intended for any of this to happen. He had been weak. One time. But the one time opened the door for all the other occasions. He knew he couldn’t turn back the clock. Once he had tasted the flesh of his neighbor, there was no more self-control. Her body and her sensuality were off the charts. He often wondered how any mortal man could control himself if offered a chance to be with her. She was that incredible.

  But she wasn’t Samantha. He loved Samantha. Completely. She was everything he had ever wanted in a wife and a best friend. And he enjoyed their sex life even if it was a little vanilla. There was no reason, no good reason, for Holden to stray from Samantha.

  Yet he had.

  And still did.

  Holden dried his face in the towel. He shot himself a glare of shame and disapproval. The image staring back at him appeared to be a stranger on the other side of the glass. A doppelganger with bad intentions and ice in his veins. A man who was willing to sacrifice all he loved for carnal pleasures and fleeting moments of orgasm.

  He opened the door and left the bathroom. As he approached the master bedroom, Holden paused in the hallway. He listened at the door before going inside. The room was quiet. Samantha was either reading or sleeping.

  Holden opened the door to a dark bedroom. Samantha must be sleeping. He closed the door and the darkness enfolded him. He started to creep toward the bed when the light from the master bathroom came on.

  Samantha stood in the doorway wearing a sheer teddy. Her body radiated across the darkness with a halo of light glowing around her from the bathroom. She licked her lips and whispered.

  “I’ve been expecting you, Mr. Fisher.”

  Holden gulped as Samantha said it. She had never acted like this before. And the way she called him Mr. Fisher sounded like one of the times he showed up at Rebecca’s house.

  His member strained at his jeans. Holden felt excited and scared at the same time.

  Chapter 25

  Zoe met Spencer in the parking lot of the local food store. He had called her to say he had something to show her. She was out to dinner with her family. Zoe asked him to meet her in the inconspicuous location so she could check him out before they got together. She knew she couldn’t be too careful. Especially since Spencer believed in her plans for The First Cut. He believed a little too strongly. And the fact that it was his idea behind the rituals made her extra cautious of Spencer’s motives.

  She pulled into the parking lot and parked several rows from where she told him to park. Zoe sat in the darkness watching for ten minutes or so. Once she felt satisfied Spencer had come alone, Zoe turned on her car and drove over to his spot. She pulled in next to his car and lowered the passenger window.

  “Get in.”

  Spencer nodded his head toward his own car. “You come in here. I have to show you something.”

  Zoe plotted out her escape plan should she need one. Then she nodded agreement and raised her window. Zoe turned off her car and walked around to the passenger side of Spencer’s vehicle. She kept her key chain with the mini box cutter in her right pocket where she could get to it in a pinch. Zoe opened the door and sunk into the leather seat. She sensed Spencer’s excitement, which forced her to relax. If he were planning something more sinister he would be serious or nervous. His expression revealed the exact opposite.

  “So, what’s so important that we can’t wait until school on Monday?”

  Spencer reached over toward Zoe’s lap. She stiffened, ready to defend herself. But Spencer opened the glove box and took out two mason jars. One was clearly filled with blood. The other jar held a questionable liquid in it. He swirled the jars in front of her face and laughed excitedly.

  “I have something to help us out for our next meeting.”

  “Where did you get it?” Zoe watched his eyes carefully.

  “From myself.” Spencer proudly proclaimed ownership of his substances.

  Zoe immediately figured out what the other jar contained. She was surprised at how much was in the jar, which is why she hadn’t figured it out from the start.

  “And how do you plan to employ these into the ritual?”

  Spencer explained to Zoe the background of the works of Aleister Crowley. He rambled on about the Golden Dawn and the Ordo Templi Orientis until she couldn’t take any more extraneous history lessons on the occult. Zoe squeezed Spencer’s thighs with her nails digging into his jeans.

  “Enough bullshit. What does it mean?” She glared at Spencer, angry he had made her lose control. But at this hour of the night, with a full belly from dinner, all she wanted to do was curl up in bed and sleep.

  Spencer looked hurt, for a second. He shook it off and changed gears to teach Zoe about sex magick. He related a story about his favorite occult practitioner, Aleister Crowley, using his own semen mixed with blood in order to reach higher levels of enlightenment. He filled Zoe in about using menstrual blood mixed with semen but he didn’t think they had to go that far. Spencer went on to describe Crowley’s beliefs that sexual orgasm could be used to obtain one’s truest desires. By focusing all one’s attention on the most desired at the pinnacle of orgasm, the mind would be expanded and achievement of the desired could be more easily obtained.

  Zoe’s head spun as she tried to wrap her mind around the esoteric philosophies of the man known as the Great Beast. She recalled Spencer talking about Crowley and Heinrich Himmler and Jack Parsons amongst other names she couldn’t remember. Spencer’s obsession with the weirdest studies on the planet seemed to have come full circle as he now tried to use what he had read about to achieve his own enlightenment.

  Zoe felt better about Spencer’s intentions for The First Cut. She thought she could relax about his desires to usurp her control and overpower her as the leader of the group. Zoe needed Spencer’s ritual practices and occult knowledge to aid her in getting what she wanted. But she would still need to keep a tight leash on the intelligent genius she considered a friend.

  “So you mix it up and do what with it?”

  “Drink it.” Spencer responded flatly. He must have seen Zoe’s face scrunch up. He laughed and placed the jars back in the glove box. “When you let go of the physical world and its rules and norms, you free yourself to enter the ethereal plane of existence. Stretching beyond our world to commune with the gods.”

  Zoe nodded understanding, which she totally faked. She was tired and just wanted to go home. Yet, she was glad Spencer had brought this information to her. It was something she would be able to use. And having it this far in advance allowed her time to mull it over and employ it to the maximum benefit in Friday night’s ritual.

  She stroked Spencer’s bald cheek. “You did good, kid. Keep all this under your hat until we talk before next Friday. I think the power in the reveal is the surprise behind it. Do you agree?”

  Spencer nodded emphatically. “Definitely. You saw their faces when we unleashed upon them. Did you feel the power?” Spencer’s eyes seemed to light up with intensity. Zoe could tell from his demeanor that he had felt what she had that night. It was both good and bad. Good, because he knew the importance of it and felt its power. Bad, because he might want more of it. So much more that he would be willing to move Zoe out of the way to keep it all for himself. She would have to keep an eye on Spencer’s energy during the rituals in the future. Zoe would have to figure out a way to re-direct some of what went to Spencer toward herself.

  “I did feel it. And I want more of it. So let’s make sure we maintain secrecy so we can harness the lion’s share for ourselves.” Zoe sat for another few seconds to gauge Spencer’s reaction. He didn’t appear to take offense to her notion of drawing more power than the others in the group. Satisfied she was still on top, Zoe wished Spencer a goodnight and climbed out of his car.

  She stood behind her car as she watched Spencer back out of the parking spot and drive away. He waved at her, she on
ly smiled back at him. His tail lights diminished across the lot as he drove off.

  Zoe took a deep breath of fresh night air. She thought about her plans for the upcoming meeting. She needed to make a few minor adjustments based on this new information.

  Zoe looked forward to Friday night.

  Chapter 26

  Friday night had arrived quicker than Aiden anticipated. He stood on Leah’s front porch, waiting for her to answer the door. He had promised Leah he would pick her up and they would go to Jordyn’s house across the street together. Both of them were worried about the upcoming meeting.

  The group had been largely silent all week. Aiden hardly saw Todd and Ryan at school. And when he did, they seemed to have excuses for why they couldn’t stick around and chat. The awkwardness stretched beyond Aiden during these encounters. Aiden had run into Spencer, who mildly greeted him in the hallways. Aiden watched as kids behind Spencer stared at his shaved head or pointed and cupped their mouths in disbelief. His shiny scalp was a shock to everyone’s system since he had always boasted a luscious full head of hair.

  As for Zoe, she remained mostly aloof as usual. Nothing had changed in her demeanor since last week’s meeting. Jordyn appeared normal, too. Maybe even a little happy or excited even. Her smile had been wider and brighter than it usually was. And it was always that way before. Like the others, Jordyn remained distant and quiet in spite of her seeming zeal for the next meeting.

  Aiden found it strange how everyone drove themselves to school instead of the typical carpooling. The reasons varied but all members of The First Cut remained separate but equal all week.

  No more waiting.