by Lori Ryan
They’d fallen back into an uneasy truce, of sorts, but they didn’t talk much and things were strained. He could see dark circles forming under Jennie’s eyes again and knew she wasn’t sleeping well.
He pulled off the highway a half hour from Jennie’s parents’ house. He dug out a burner phone they hadn’t used yet and pulled a sheet of phone numbers from his wallet. He punched in one of the phone numbers and handed the phone to Jennie after placing it on speaker.
“Don’t tell your parents where we are and don’t let on that we’re coming. Tell them we’re hopping from one hotel to another,” he said as the phone rang.
She nodded.
“Jennie? Is that you?” Her mother sounded about like you’d expect. Desperate for news. Desperate to hear her daughter’s voice.
“Yeah, Mom, it’s me. Chad’s on the line, too.”
“Hi, Chad, honey. How are you guys?”
Chad would have smiled at the way Jennie’s mom greeted him as if he were just as important to her as Jennie was, but he needed to stay focused on getting Jennie in and out quickly.
“We’re great, Mom. We’re staying in hotels right now, but it’s not too bad,” Jennie said.
“We wanted to check in and see if you’ve seen anything unusual there. Has anyone been around that shouldn’t be? Anyone who seems out of place?” Chad asked.
“No,” Jennie’s mom said, “nothing unusual.”
“How about any houses for lease or rent on your block. Or any houses that are empty for renovations or anything like that?” Chad asked.
Jennie’s mother was quiet, as if she were thinking, before answering, “No.”
“Have you seen any workmen or a new mail carrier on your route? Telephone repair? Construction nearby?”
“No,” came the answer, the tension in her voice clear.
Chad nodded at Jennie and pulled off the road as she finished her conversation with her mom. They talked for a few minutes before ending the call quite close to her parents’ house.
When they pulled into the driveway in the early evening, he took out a new cell phone and texted Agent Burke to arrange for Burke to take Jennie’s statement the following day.
He texted her parents’ address and told Burke to have an agent come there for the statement. He said he would keep her there for twenty-four hours only before they moved on so if Burke wanted his statement, he needed to get there in that timeframe. Chad wanted to control things as much as possible.
Jack would have lawyers on standby if Burke tried to force Chad’s hand and keep Jennie in the area.
Jennie’s parents came out of the house and enveloped her in tears and hugs. He could see their disappointment when she told them the visit would only be for a day and then she and Chad would go back into hiding. They tried to be upbeat about it, but the strain of the situation was clear in the tightness of their features.
Chad shook hands with Jennie’s father, Phil, and hugged her mother, Barb. He had met them once before at Kelly and Jack’s wedding and knew they were the type of people that immediately welcomed friends as if they were family.
“We’re going over to the Evans’ house for a barbeque in a few minutes. They’ll be thrilled to see you,” said Jennie’s mom.
It struck Chad then that Jennie’s last name—Evans—was her married name. He’d never really thought about it before, but of course she still went by it.
The front door of the house on the left opened then and Chad assumed the man and woman drawing Jennie into more hugs were Kyle’s parents. He nodded politely when they were introduced as Annie and Brian Evans.
When they all settled into the Evans’ backyard, drinks in hand, burgers on the grill, Chad could almost pretend things were normal. But they weren’t.
He saw the second when Jennie’s mother noticed the changes in her daughter’s body and turned an uneasy look toward Chad. Jennie wasn’t really showing yet, but maybe mothers somehow know these things about their daughters. Her waist was ever so slightly thicker than it had been and her breasts were bigger, but you couldn’t tell very easily with the shirt she had on.
Chad ducked his head against her mother’s look. Jennie would have to be the one to tell her this news. It wasn’t his place.
They gathered inside, in a casual dining room, for dinner. When the plates had been filled with burgers, coleslaw, potato salad, and corn, Chad saw Jennie fight back nausea as she eyed her plate.
He knew perfectly well she couldn’t eat this food. He didn’t know how she planned to fake it. He got up and went to his duffle bag by the door and returned with two baby food pouches. He handed them to Jennie without a word, despite the four questioning gazes that jumped between him and Jennie.
He knew he wasn’t being very subtle about her inability to eat real food, but he wasn’t in the mood for games. She needed to tell her parents the truth. Besides, a few more minutes trying to pretend she could eat that food and she’d be running to the bathroom. Trying to slip her the food pouches unseen somehow would just be futile.
“Thank you,” Jennie murmured and opened one pouch to eat it. Chad removed her plate, putting it aside so the smell of the burger wouldn’t make her sick. The medicine the doctor had given her helped a lot, but Jennie was still overly sensitive to strong smells.
“All right,” Jennie’s mother said, tossing her napkin on the table and standing up. “What’s going on, Jennie? Chad?”
“You need to tell them. Jennie. Your mom’s already guessed,” Chad said quietly.
“What? No, she hasn’t!” Jennie shook her head, her eyes wide, as if she were still trying to will everything away.
“Jennie, you’re either sick or you’re pregnant, but you’re scaring the wits out of me. Tell me which one it is,” Jennie’s mother said. Kyle’s mother didn’t look surprised but the men sure did.
They dropped their forks and gaped.
It must be a mother thing. Mothers seemed to have radar.
Jennie looked up into the faces of her parents and her in-laws. Faces that showed nothing but love and worry for the woman sitting in front of them. And, then she bolted.
Chapter 32
This can’t be happening. It just can’t be happening.
Jennie hadn’t planned on telling her parents about the baby on this trip, and she certainly hadn’t planned to tell them in front of Kyle’s parents. She wasn’t showing yet so she hadn’t even thought she’d need to face this so soon. She thought she had time.
She paced in the living room as Zeke circled around her, whining. Chad came quietly into the room and sat on the couch—ready and waiting as if on standby until she needed him.
She realized he’d always be there for her. Always be ready to help her, to save her, when she needed him.
Why he still cared about her, she couldn't figure out. She’d caused him so much pain. After all the horrible things she'd said to him, he still sat ready and willing to help her.
It wasn’t long before the others followed him, waiting for her to explain.
“Jennie, please tell me you’re not sick. Please.” Her mother spoke quietly, but the panic in her voice was evident.
“I’m sorry, Mom. I’m not sick.” Jennie swiped at tears and wrapped her arms around herself, holding tight.
She still hadn’t admitted to being pregnant, but based on her answer it was now clear to everyone in the room.
Jennie’s dad met Chad’s gaze. He didn’t sound angry when he spoke, which surprised Jennie. “Do you love her, Chad?”
Chad looked straight at her father when he answered. “Very much, but unfortunately, that’s not relevant here.”
Jennie felt her breath coming in shallow gasps and she thought she might pass out. A small part of her realized she was probably hyperventilating but she didn’t know what to do about that.
She didn’t know how to stop what was happening. She wanted it all to just stop. Her arms shook as she tried to will away the events unfolding before her.
; It was Kyle’s mom who spoke next. Jennie had always loved her as much as she loved her own mother. It hurt to have both women looking at her now. She wanted to hide, to crawl away and curl up, instead of facing this.
“Jennie, honey, I know you loved Kyle. I know how hard it was for you to lose him. But, it’s time, honey. It’s time for you to let him go. It’s time to let yourself be happy again.”
Don’t they understand? Don’t they get it? She couldn’t be happy. Wouldn’t be happy in another man’s arms. They didn’t understand what she had done. They didn’t know she was the reason their son died.
Tears streamed, unencumbered, down Jennie’s face as she faced the people who loved her. Would they still love her if they knew the truth?
“Jennie—” Kyle’s dad took an almost imperceptible step forward and seemed to want to reach for her, but didn’t. “Honey, she’s right. Kyle wouldn’t want to see you like this. He wouldn’t want you to give up on having a life, on finding love again, just because he’s gone.”
She heard the murmured agreements by those around her, but she knew the truth. She knew what they didn’t know. What no one could know.
The words were wrenched from her soul, but it was time to tell them. “I can’t. I... You don’t know. I’m the reason he died. I killed Kyle.”
The words came pouring out in a torrent that Jennie couldn’t control, couldn’t check in any way.
“I told him to wait. Kyle was sick and getting so many headaches. He was tired all the time, but he had just started his new job. When we graduated from school, Kyle started it right away but I didn’t have a job yet. Money was so tight and his health insurance wouldn’t kick in until he’d been at his job for ninety days.”
Jennie doubled over feeling like the emotion of telling them would cut her in two, but Chad’s arms came around her, catching her.
He lifted her up and carried her to the couch, where he cradled her in his arms and held her tight while she continued to talk through the tears.
“When he was in the hospital, I asked the doctor, ‘If we had found it earlier, would that have made a difference?’ He said every day, every week, with cancer treatment makes a difference. Because of me, Kyle waited three months before seeing a doctor. Three months could have saved him. He could be here with us instead of gone if I hadn’t been so selfish.”
As Jennie leaned into Chad and cried, he shushed her, and rocked her, surrounded by Kyle’s parents and her parents.
She looked up at them and couldn’t understand why they all still looked at her with love in their eyes. With understanding and concern instead of hatred. Why weren’t they looking at her with disgust after what she just told them? Didn’t they understand?
Kyle’s mom leaned close and took Jennie’s hand in hers. “Jennie, you didn’t kill Kyle. You listen to me, sweetheart. That doctor had no right to tell you that. No right at all, sweetheart. You and Kyle were so young when you married. You’d have no reason to think he was so sick. None of us did. I brought him chicken soup, for heaven’s sake, Jennie. I didn’t make him go to a doctor. I made him soup.”
Jennie’s breath was ragged and her throat hurt from trying to choke in air around the sobs. Her chest hitched uncontrollably with every inhale as she tried to process what was said.
And through it all, Chad held on tight to her, rocking her until she wore herself out and the flow of tears began to slow.
As she caught her breath, Kyle’s father spoke so quietly she almost couldn’t hear him at first.
“Kyle knew, Jennie,” he said.
“What?” Her head snapped up and it sounded as if everyone in the room was holding their breath. She could tell by the look on their faces, no one else had known this secret either.
“He told me. About a week before he died. He told me he had gone to a clinic without telling you. He used a fake name so it wouldn’t be on his work medical record as a preexisting condition. They told him he needed to start treatment right away, but he didn’t want to strap you with that burden financially. By that time, it was only a matter of about five more weeks before his insurance kicked in, so he waited. He made a choice, Jennie. And, it wasn’t that choice that killed him and it wasn’t you that killed him. It was cancer that killed Kyle. It wasn’t fair and it wasn’t right for him or for you to have to go through that, but that doesn’t make it your fault, Jennie.
She stared in shock as she tried to process what he’d just said. As she tried to absorb the fact that maybe, just maybe, she’d held onto a guilt she shouldn’t have had to bear all these years. For four years, she’d held on.
She’d punished herself, never allowing her heart to move on. And, now, in the span of only minutes, she’d been told by people she loved and believed, that she didn’t have to. That it was all right to finally let it all go.
Chapter 33
Dinner forgotten, they all settled in the living room as Chad held Jennie in his arms. She had worn herself out. She lay limp against him, having finally succumbed to sleep.
He suspected she hadn't been sleeping well since they had their fight at the cabin. He leaned back against the couch, shifting sideways so he could let her stretch out a bit and sleep.
Her parents and in-laws surrounded them, as if unable to pull themselves away. Her father started talking first, and initially, Chad wished they wouldn’t tell him about Kyle. But, after a minute, he realized they weren’t.
They were really telling him about Jennie because Kyle was as much a part of Jennie as they all were. To really know Jennie, Chad had to know Kyle, too. He had to know the whole story.
“She used to follow him around when he was twelve. She thought he hung the moon and the stars, but he thought she had cooties at that age,” Jennie’s dad said, laughing at the memory.
Chad could picture Jennie then. He pictured a young version of the happier Jennie he used to know, not the woman she had been in the last few months.
“She would do things to get his attention like hide his football or put itching powder down the back of his shorts,” said Kyle’s mom.
“Oh, God. I remember that! The things she put that poor boy through,” said Jennie’s mom shaking her head.
They began to tell stories about Jennie and Kyle. About the year Kyle finally noticed girls in general, and Jennie in particular. About their junior prom and their senior prom.
About Kyle saving up to buy Jennie a promise ring and the time they caught Kyle climbing the trellis to get to Jennie’s room at night.
About how Kyle proposed to Jennie at the family celebration of Kyle’s college graduation and how she cried when he got down on one knee.
They talked late into the night as Jennie slept. Chad thought he would feel jealous, hearing about her perfect relationship with the man he couldn’t begin to compete with. But he didn’t.
He liked hearing about how happy Jennie had been. He wanted that back for her. It hurt like hell that he couldn’t give her that happiness, but if he couldn’t give it to her, he wanted her to find it any way she could.
Eventually, the stories of Kyle and Jennie stopped and the group sat quietly for a bit even though it was well past midnight. It was as though none of them could stand to leave Jennie for the short time she’d be home.
They had turned out the lights and had only a small lamp on as they talked. At some point they’d eaten cold burgers, bringing the plates in from the dining room to eat picnic style in the living room.
“What do you think you want it to be, Chad? A boy or a girl?” Jennie’s dad grinned as he asked the question.
“Oh, it can’t be a girl,” Chad said with an equally big grin that told them he really didn’t care if it was a boy or a girl. “Then two women will have me wrapped around their little fingers,” he said with mock fear in his voice. “I can’t have that.”
As they laughed, Chad heard a car creep to a halt outside Jennie’s parents’ house next door. He went immediately on alert just as Zeke stood and growled, low and in his
throat. It wasn’t a loud bark. It was an almost silent warning.
The headlights on the car were cut before it even finished pulling to the curb and whoever was in it didn’t exit right away.
Chad sat Jennie up, placing a finger to his lips to indicate to the group to be quiet.
“Jen,” he shook her a little. “Jen, did you tell anyone we were here? Text or call anyone?”
She looked at him with confusion in her gaze but shook her head, no.
Chad looked up at the couples sitting around him. “Have you called anyone since we arrived?”
He had a bad feeling about this. And he trusted his gut. It had kept him alive in a lot of tough situations.
All four of them shook their heads.
Chad left Jennie on the couch and motioned to everyone to stay put. He slipped his Glock out of his duffel and held it by his right leg as he went to the window to watch Jennie’s house.
Two men exited the car. He didn’t recognize them, but their dark clothing furthered the feeling of unease coming over him. As he watched, they crept toward the house carrying large containers. It took only seconds for Chad to recognize they had containers of gasoline.
He grabbed his phone and tossed it to Jennie’s dad. “They’re setting your house on fire. Call 911. Tell them what I look like and what I’m wearing. Stay inside until I get back,” he said as he turned toward the back of the house.
He heard Jennie cry out behind him, but he had to leave her. He needed to find out who the men next door were and how they’d tracked them down. Once the police arrived, he wouldn’t have a shot at any of that.
He crossed through the dining room, grabbing one of the cloth napkins from the table and tying it around his mouth and nose, cowboy style. He went into the kitchen, then slipped out into the yard.
He moved silently as he took in the location of the men next door. He stopped and listened, focusing only on the sounds around him. He could hear one man at the front of the house and one at the back. And neither was expecting him.
