Order vs. Chaos

by Mary E Thompson

  He scoffed. “I didn’t do anything. He had trouble getting up today. Might be a sign, Kiki.”

  “What?” I blurted. There was no way I’d heard him right.

  “You need to back off, Kapena. Don’t do this.”

  “Do what?” he asked, trying to be all innocent. I was not convinced.

  “You’re the only family I have, Kapena. Don’t try to turn me against him. I want you to like him. Maybe things will work out. Maybe they won’t. But let me make my own choices.”

  “Like last time?”

  “Last time was different,” she said softly. “I picked someone who didn’t want me. Someone who wasn’t right.”

  “Do you know he’s so different?”

  Kiana blanched. “Do you know he’s not?”

  I leaned against the couch, watching them square off. It was strange to have them arguing over me, but I felt like I couldn’t defend myself. If Kapena didn’t trust me, nothing I said would change his mind.

  “If you like him so much, why has it taken you this long to go out with him?”

  “I’m scared, okay,” she said, her back to me. “I’m scared that I’m going to get hurt again. I like him, Kapena. But I liked Anthony, too.”

  “If he hurts you, I’ll kill him,” Kapena said, his eyes on me.

  She breathed a laugh. “I know. And I love you for it. He hasn’t given me any reason to think he will. I just keep thinking about how things started with Anthony. A kiss here. A late night there. I sort of fell into bed with him. It wasn’t a thought out plan. It just happened. And I know you don’t want to hear this,” she said quickly. “But it’s hard for me to think about getting right back into things with someone new.”

  “It’s been months, Kiki.”

  She nodded. “I know. Because I’ve been too scared to try.”

  “Why him?” Kapena said with another glare for me.

  “Because he tries. He looks out for me. He waited after the first wedding until I went home. He bought me lunch. He always wants to help, not for credit, but because he wants to help.” She paused and glanced over her shoulder at me. “And because he doesn’t want to hide us.”

  I stared into her dark eyes for a long moment, knowing Kapena would squash our connection before long. He cleared his throat, drawing her attention back to him.

  “You’re still a kid to me. I don’t want any man to put his hands on you. But this one doesn’t seem so bad.”

  I huffed a laugh. “Thanks, friend.”

  “You’re lucky you got a compliment that big,” Kiana said. “He didn’t make you fight him first.”

  “That’s still an option,” Kapena said, cracking his knuckles.

  “You’ve already hit me twice. If that wasn’t enough, I’ll take some more.”

  “Why?” Kapena asked, laughing.

  “I came here looking for something. Being with your sister is the only time I feel like I might actually find it.”

  Kiana smiled at me. Kapena grumbled and went back to fixing dinner. Kiana approached me. I reached for her, then quickly dropped my hand. She looked at it like something was wrong.

  “What?”

  I shook my head. “I’m taking your lead. I know you’re in a tough spot. Especially since everyone at work knew you were with Anthony. I know you don’t want them to think any less of you or think you hired me for the wrong reasons. So I’m following you from now on. I’ll try to keep my asshole side quiet.”

  She stepped closer, close enough that it was almost painful not to reach for her. “I think I like your asshole side. Especially if that side is the one that kisses me the way you do.”

  “Your brother’s watching us.”

  “Then we should give him a show.”

  “I don’t—”

  She yanked my lips down to hers, not giving me a chance to argue. I kept my hands to myself, knowing Kapena would kill me if I touched her. It didn’t matter that she kissed me. All that mattered was he was going to kill me.

  She kept kissing me, her lips moving under mine and turning me on. Her body pressed against mine, rubbing my cock and making me hard. I felt like I had a fever, but it was just her, heating me up from the inside out.

  She nipped my lip, then soothed it with her tongue, and fuck if I could hold out any longer.

  I wrapped my arms around her, keeping them low on her waist. Her shirt gapped, giving me an inch of soft skin that I had to touch. My thumb dipped beneath her shirt, and I kissed the hell out of her.

  Our tongues played, rubbing each other then hiding. I growled at her, which only made her laugh. She nipped me again. Shit, I wanted her.

  I was about two seconds from carrying her to my room when Kapena cleared his throat loudly. I’d forgotten all about him. I pulled back from Kiana, keeping my focus on her.

  “He’s gonna kick my ass. You know that, right?” I whispered.

  She smirked. “Probably. You said you’d fight for me.”

  I pulled in a deep breath, bringing my chest back into contact with hers. “I was hoping I wouldn’t have to.”

  She shrugged. “Scars are kinda hot.”

  “Scars? What do you think he’s going to do to me?”

  She laughed. “Nothing. He’s all talk.”

  “Not this time, little sis. He’s got a few more surf lessons coming up. If he kisses you like that around me again, he might not make it back in from those lessons.”

  Kiana rolled her eyes and went to her brother. “I’ll let you save that for if he hurts me. Otherwise, I think I’ll teach him to surf from now on.”

  Kiana took a plate and walked to the lanai, leaving Kapena and me to stare each other down.

  Uh, yeah. I didn’t win that one. But I did get another kiss from Kiana before she left. When Kapena wasn’t looking.

  I knew better than to ask Kapena where I should take his sister for our first date. I did some research online and found a place that got good reviews. I wanted to take her someplace nice, but not so over the top she’d think I was just trying to sleep with her.

  When I pulled up in front of her building, she was walking out the door. Her black capris and red top with big white flowers made me grin. Damn, she was beautiful.

  “Hey,” I said, stopping my bike near her.

  “Hey,” she said when she looked at me. “I somehow forgot you drove a motorcycle. Maybe we should take my car.”

  I shook my head. “I’m not missing a chance to have your arms around me. Are you ready to go?”

  She shook her head. “Sorry. I forgot to grab the plug for my computer. I was going to charge it while we were gone. Why don’t you come in?”

  I took off my helmet and followed her inside. Her place was cute, like her. Everything was perfectly organized, right down to the hook just inside the door for her keys and another one for her purse. I looked around her living room, not caring that I was snooping, as she disappeared down a hallway at the back of the room.

  Pictures lined her mantle. I recognized Kapena, Ada, and Jack. The older couple had to be her parents. There were a bunch of shots of Opposites Attract during construction. On the walls were large pictures of Hawaii. One from each island it appeared. I wondered if she ever thought about visiting anywhere else, but it was clear she loved her home.

  Not that I blamed her.

  She came back into the room with a small purse and her hair in a ponytail. “I’m ready.”

  I nodded and met her at the door, wishing I’d gotten a chance to look around her place more.

  Kiana slid her arms around my waist when she was situated on the back of my bike. She looked cute in my helmet, but I really needed to get her one if she was going to ride with me more often.

  We drove from her house to the small restaurant I chose around the corner. The parking lot was empty, and the lights were off.

  “They’re not open on Mondays,” she said. “Is this where we were supposed to go?”

  Well, shit. That was not a good start.

  �
��Um, yeah, but we’ll find someplace else.”

  I pulled out of the lot and went left. I had no idea where I was or what was around, but I was not going to end up disappointing her. I drove for a few minutes, and before I knew it, we were out of town. I didn’t want to take her thirty minutes to Ke’aloha, but I was clueless about her town.

  She tapped me on the shoulder and told me to pull over. Since there wasn’t anywhere around, I just eased onto the side of the road.

  “Do you want me to offer a suggestion?” she asked when I looked over my shoulder at her.

  I sighed. No, I really didn’t want her to have to figure out where we were going, but I was out of options. It was a bit of a blow to my ego, and that was not the kind of blow I was hoping for on our first date.

  “Yeah, if you know a place.”

  “What were you thinking? Seafood, burgers, Italian, Asian? There’s a really good Asian fusion place not far.”

  I nodded. “Sounds good. How do I get there?”

  She gave me directions and we were back on the road, heading into town again. She helped me get there, pointing when I needed to turn. The parking lot was packed, so I took that as a good sign.

  We had to wait twenty minutes, but we agreed it wasn’t a big deal. They had a massive bar and a live band to keep us entertained for a while.

  “I’m sorry about the first place,” I said over the music.

  She shook her head, the coconut scent of her shampoo teasing me. “It’s not a big deal. I could have saved you the trouble and picked a place since I know the area.”

  I shrugged. My first jump into the dating pool in years, and I already sucked at it. Hopefully she enjoyed what I had in mind for after dinner.

  When we were shown to our table, we both studied our menus without speaking to each other. It grew increasingly awkward until I asked, “Why is this weird?”

  She breathed a sigh of relief. “Oh, good. You think so, too. I thought maybe it was just me.”

  “No, but why? It’s not like we’re strangers.”

  She shrugged. “Well, we kind of are. I know a little about you but not much.”

  “I know what your lips taste like, Kiana. I know how soft your skin is. I know how sexy you sound when you come.”

  She nibbled her lip and looked up at me through her lashes. Damn she was sexy.

  “I can’t wait to learn more about you. Like how you feel when I—”

  “Good evening,” the waiter said, interrupting me.

  I looked up at him with a smile and more than a touch of irritation.

  “How are you both doing this evening?”

  “We’re great,” I told him, adjusting my erection.

  He glanced at Kiana, who nodded.

  “Well, excellent. Can I start you both off with some drinks? I see you have something from the bar, maybe a refill? Or an appetizer?”

  He and I both looked at Kiana. “I’ll take another glass of wine. The house red.”

  “Excellent. And you?”

  “I’m good with a water. Thanks.”

  “Any appetizers?”

  “Stuffed mushrooms okay with you?” she asked.

  I nodded, not wanting to tell her I hated mushrooms. If she liked them, I’d choke one or two down.

  “I’ll put that right in and be back to take your dinner orders in a few minutes.”

  “Mahalo,” she said.

  He walked away, leaving us alone again.

  “I think we should save some of that getting to know you stuff for later. Right now, why don’t you tell me something you’ve never told anyone else?”

  “Anyone?”

  She grinned, knowing she had me by the shorties. “Anyone.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  I could lie. Just tell her something a lot of people knew. She’d never find out since she didn’t know my friends or family. And if she ever met them over the summer, we’d probably be over.

  Ah, shit. How did I let myself get involved with my boss again?

  Why did I let Ethan convince me this was a good idea?

  “What’s that look for?” she asked, sipping the last of her wine.

  I shook my head, knowing I couldn’t tell her that.

  “I changed my mind,” she said. “I want to know what you just thought instead.”

  I huffed. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

  “Why not?”

  “Ah, because you’re probably going to be pissed.”

  “Let’s hear it.”

  When I played poker with Ethan, Brady, and Graham, I could take them. Easily. None of them could read me. But Kiana acted like she had a manual. Five expressions he’ll make when he doesn’t want to tell you something. Six ways he’ll try to weasel out of something. Three sure fire questions to make him squirm.

  Shit.

  “Fine. I was thinking I wish I could have another beer. I feel like I need something to take the edge off.”

  Yep, I lied my ass off. Fingers crossed she believed it.

  She nodded slowly. “I appreciate you not drinking more than one beer. Driving a car is hard enough after a couple of drinks. I’d think a motorcycle is worse.”

  “It is.” I nodded, feeling like I’d won. I hid my grin behind the beer bottle. Damn, I was good.

  “What were you really thinking?”

  A laugh burst from me. “How do you know that wasn’t it?”

  “Because there’s no way you’d have told me the truth the first time. And that wouldn’t have pissed me off. Out with it.”

  I groaned, knowing I was going to regret telling her what I was really thinking. “I was thinking it was stupid of me to get involved with you because you’re my boss. And since I suck with relationships, I have a pretty strong suspicion this won’t last. Which means I’ll be out of a job.”

  She regarded me carefully before she shook her head. “I’m kind of offended that you’d think I would fire you if things didn’t work out between us. I’m pretty sure that’s illegal, but even if it wasn’t, it would be shitty.”

  “I’m sure I’ll do something stupid and fuck this up.”

  “It’s our first date, Sawyer. You need to relax.”

  “Aren’t you the one who just got out of a bad relationship?”

  “I am. Which means you’re the one who’s supposed to be pushing for this, not me.”

  We both laughed. “Well, maybe I need a little bit of a push, too. Although I’ve been getting pushed for a while.”

  “By who?”

  “My friends. I was telling you about them. They’re all so in love that it’s made me wish a little bit that I could find that. These macho, tough guys become complete wimps when their wives and girlfriends are around.”

  “And you want to be a wimp?”

  I laughed. “Maybe. I wouldn’t mind having someone to come home to.”

  She nodded. “Yeah, I always wanted that, too.”

  “You and shithead didn’t live together?”

  She shook her head. “Nope. That would raise too many questions. Everyone would figure it out if we spent too many nights together.”

  “He really was an ass.”

  “Yep. He was. And I fell for all of it.”

  “You can’t beat yourself up about it.”

  “Better than letting it happen again.”

  “What the hell is wrong with us? We’re on a first date and telling each other all the stupid shit we’ve done. All the reasons we shouldn’t be together. Shouldn’t I be selling you on how great I am?”

  Kiana laughed, her head tilted back to expose her neck. I wanted to run my tongue down her neck and see where I could end up.

  There went my dick again.

  Her eyes met mine, her laugh freezing in her throat. “I think that’s why we’re here,” she said, her voice husky.

  “Why?”

  “Because of the way you look at me. You make it seem like I’m the only woman you see.”

  I laughed. “You are. I wasn�
�t lying when I said you’re the only woman I’ve noticed since I moved here.”

  “Not possible.”

  I shrugged. “I like you. I mean, you were a challenge when I first met you, but I was up to it.”

  “Well, you’ve got me now. What are you going to do with me?”

  “Are we ready to order?” the waiter said, appearing out of nowhere. The guy had the worst fucking timing.

  “I’ll have the prawns, please,” Kiana said as though she’d just been studying her menu.

  I flipped mine open while he asked about her sides. “And you?” he asked a second later.

  I ordered the first thing I saw. “Seafood sampler.”

  “Do you want everything that comes with that?”

  “Yep.”

  “Great. I’ll get that right in. Let me know if you need anything else in the meantime. Your mushrooms should be up any minute.”

  We waited until he was gone to look at each other again.

  “Do you have an answer?” she asked again.

  I shook my head. “There are too many options to know what to do with you. The first thing is, I know I don’t have you. This is our first date. I need to impress the hell out of you and get you to tell everyone we’re together before I can even start to think I have you. And even then, like I said before, I’m sure I’ll fuck this up.”

  “You have endless amounts of confidence, don’t you?”

  I shrugged. “I’ve seen way too many of my friends do the exact same thing.”

  “I thought they were all in serious relationships.”

  “They are. But they screwed them up along the way. They’re damn lucky their women were willing to give them another chance.”

  “I think you can only get so many chances. I’m not the kind of person to look the other way forever.”

  I shook my head. “Me neither. Two chances, maybe, and I’d be done. I can’t imagine giving someone more chances than that. Not even that many if they screwed up real bad the first time.”

  “I think I gave Anthony about twenty chances.”

  “And we both know how that turned out.”

  She huffed a laugh. “Yes, we do. You know, I’ve been pissed off and hurt for months. I believed that it was all my fault that he didn’t want me. And you’ve been here for a few weeks, and I feel like I was the one who was wronged.”