Ember Rising Light (Book One)

by C.K. Mullinax

  Chapter Fifty Nine

  I had actually forgotten about my upcoming birthday because I was so consumed by everything else. I spent hours trying to secretly pry information out of my brother, begging my best friend to find time to help me formulate new strategies or endlessly training with Celeste and Willow that it slipped my mind. When Tray mentioned that I needed to select which restaurant I wanted to go to, my stress level rose quickly.

  “You think I’ll be able to maintain my spirit light at a restaurant with music and people? I can only imagine what’ll happen if I lose control of it in public…” I offered and then, bit down on my lower lip to stop myself from rambling further.

  I had managed to control my spirit light during my last few lessons, but I was still consumed by anxiety. Every nice restaurant I have ever eaten at has music playing. I had no clue if I would be able to maintain control in that type of setting.

  “We’re going out to eat for your birthday just like we do every year on the same day. You’ll be okay kiddo – no worries,” Tray said with his back to me, so I couldn’t see his facial expression.

  I walked into the living room because I wanted to look him in the eyes.

  “We could get take out instead…” I offered and watched him closely for any signs of impending trouble ahead.

  “This kind of anxiety – coming from the same girl who ran through the mall on the day before Christmas Eve – please…” Tray reminded me.

  My thoughts turned immediately to my internal incinerator. It had almost burned me alive from the inside that same day I had been so brave. My hand instantly grabbed my chest and I shivered from the memory. I also had a very compelling, ulterior motive the day I went to the mall. The motivation to buy my brother a super special gift had given me a tremendous amount of courage. My own birthday wasn’t a big motivator – at least, not in my estimation. I crossed my arms defiantly and prepared to debate the issue with him.

  “No arguments so you can just uncross those arms. You’ve got enough control of your spirit light. I’ll be right beside you, behind you, stuck to you like we’re super glued together – wherever you need me to be. We’re going and it’s gonna be fun,” Tray announced and then, gave me his best sideways smile.

  I searched his face and realized he truly believed what he just told me. If my brother had that much confidence in my ability to control my spirit light then it would be okay. I returned his smile and hugged him.

  “I’ll look through the phone book – gimme a minute,” I said, enthusiastically.

  Searching through the listing, I tried to make a decision. Tray always took me out to a special dinner the day before my birthday – it’s our tradition. Then, suddenly I had a brilliant idea and a new motivator loomed on my imminent horizon. I called Willow.

  “Hey Ember, whatcha doing?” Willow asked.

  “I’m calling to invite you out to dinner on Friday for my birthday,” I told her.

  “Friday is your birthday?” she inquired, slightly surprised.

  “No, it’s on Saturday, but Tray always takes me out on Valentine’s Day. I guess he gets two birds for one toss – if you know what I mean…” I explain to her and then held my breath in anticipation.

  She hesitated. I could almost see her weighing the options in her mind.

  “I’m…” was all I gave her time to say.

  “You can’t say ‘no’ because going out to dinner with us is your birthday gift to me,” I said and shut up.

  I wanted to pull my arm down in victory and shout “oh, yes” to the heavens above because no way could she refuse my invitation this time.

  Tray was still reclining in his favorite chair and I couldn’t see his face. I was certain that he could hear me.

  “Well, alright then, sounds like fun…”

  I had finally done it!

  I wouldn’t be able to tell Krista anything about it until tomorrow because I couldn’t risk Tray inadvertently discovering my plot. She and I will need to formulate a plan where he can’t potentially hear us.

  My mind was racing in happy circles when something unsettling occurred to me. I had been so focused on my sneaky plan to invite Willow that I had neglected to ask Tray if he minded or whether he thought we could afford it. He didn’t say anything to me while I was talking to her on the phone. Later, I asked him if it was okay to invite her and he said “sure”. Although I was still concerned about it, I had to drop the subject. I will never ask him anything else in reference to his money – ever again.

  My sizable paycheck led me to broach the topic of how much money he makes, earlier in the week. I never did discover that answer and ended up feeling very guilty for asking.

  Tray managed to turn the whole thing around on me. He thought I was suggesting that he needed him to make more money. I told him that wasn’t the point of my inquiry at all. Then, he asked me how much more money he needs to earn before we’re comfortable. I apologized and walked away from that strange conversation shaking my head and feeling like I had somehow just gotten played.

  The next day at school I managed to tell Krista bits and pieces of the news in between classes. We had to contend with constant interruptions though because of my ridiculous popularity status. I finally asked her to meet me in the library at lunch so we could formulate a plan of action.

  “Oh, Ember I can’t because I have major lunch plans with Greg already. Maybe tonight at your house – could we work it out then?” she asked me.

  “Sure, but it’ll have to be around 7 or 8ish because I’ve got plans after school,” I said and tried to hide my disappointment.

  Krista didn’t elaborate on what she was doing over lunch and I kept quiet. The least she could do was tell me where she would be during lunch. I was depressed because I had really hoped she would be more excited. After all, I had finally gotten a ‘yes’ from Willow on an invitation. Maybe I had hurt my best friend’s feelings by not inviting her too.

  “Would you like to join us when we go out on Friday?” I asked her, tentatively.

  “Sorry, I’m going out with Greg this Friday night – you know Valentine’s Day stuff. Oh, we’ve gotta get together to celebrate. How about Saturday on your real birthday?” she asked in a hushed tone.

  I had sworn her to absolute secrecy about my birthday. I have enough on my plate playing matchmaker, alone. Tray and Willow obviously require my assistance and I apparently don’t have my relationship guru to assist me with that daunting task.

  “Nope, I can’t do it then. I’m going to where Tray works for cake and ice cream with his boss,” I tried to sound cheery, but I felt the pretense as it started to shatter – I will be crying soon.

  “Sunday then, we’ll celebrate the day you graced us with your presence – it’s a date,” she said and ran to her next class without waiting on a reply.

  “Sure, Sunday…” I told her although she couldn’t hear me by that point.

  Feeling sorry for myself, I thought about my life and everything that was wrong with it. I had been taking, what felt like, a million hours of training sessions with Celeste and Willow as I tried to learn to control my spirit light, dance rituals and channels. On top of that, I had the added worry of my inner fire scorching my insides whenever I get upset, stressed out, frustrated…or sometimes for seemingly no reason. Now, I’m left to my own inept devices while trying to play matchmaker.

  My eyes filled with tears.

  Then, Krista sent me a text to cancel our plans for tonight. She had forgotten about something else she had to do. She said she wouldn’t get home until late. So I spent the rest of the week trying to find time slots to meet with her. Willow and Celeste increased my practice times by yet another two hours. They said I needed to ensure I would be fully in control of my gifts when we went out to dinner next Friday. I could hardly argue the logic in their reasoning although I desperately needed to chat with Krista.

  My best friend is the leading authority on rela
tionships and the only source I have available to ask. I have to get something from her or my diabolical scheme will fall apart before it even started.

  Although it was odd, Krista continued to cancel on me. We had been working on fixing up my brother and Willow for weeks now and suddenly, she wasn’t interested in staging the final scene with me??

  She and Greg were all engrossed in whatever it was they were doing over recent lunch breaks. I knew Krista wouldn’t be doing anything that could get her kicked out of school. I kind of decided that they might be sitting in Greg’s car making out. Normally, that thought would make me happy. I would even offer to run interference with the vice principal if they needed me to.

  Why does she pick NOW, of all times, to desert me??

  In a more desperate moment, I considered pleading with Tray to let me catch a ride home with them. That seemed like the only way I would get a chance to speak with Krista. There would probably be a better chance of him allowing me to wrestle an alligator – especially since Greg got a ticket for failure to stop at a red light back in mid-January.

  Even with Krista and Greg hidden somewhere doing their romantic thing, I was far from eating alone. Tray, Willow, Eli and all our other friends were seated right where they always were. I was lonely for Krista though, and my inner fire wasn’t happy with my depression in the least. I had taken my temperature this morning and it read a balmy 101.3. Ever since the first day I had experienced the internal fire, my temperature hadn’t dropped below 100.5. I decided not to worry until it hit at least 103 degrees.

  Think nice, cool thoughts…

  It was unexplainable, but I couldn’t seem to shake the feeling of approaching shadows. It felt like something big, dark and scary was approaching. I briefly considered the idea that it might be a new spiritual essence or ability trying to emerge. When I tried to stream it through the dance nothing happened. I didn’t share it with anyone because I was worried they would increase my practice or flip out. No matter what I did, I couldn’t seem to shake the dark feeling of impending doom.

  Something’s going to happen on my 16th birthday…

  This feeling was decidedly different from the shadows right before we needed to move away. My internal fire was gently heating me for the moment. But, I know precisely what it is capable of doing. No matter how many shadows gather, leaving isn’t possible right now.

  Ignoring the heartbreak, I tried to distract myself by paying attention to all the discussions going on around me. I offered a few comments, but my heart wasn’t into it.

  I miss my Krista…

  Eli had made his conversational rounds, talking to everyone at the table. But, he was currently engrossed in a whispered discussion with Willow. It was infuriating to realize he’s using me and my friends as a means to attach himself to her. If only there was some way to boot him back to his own world…

  His quest to use me to get a date with her knows no limits. Just last week, he intentionally stopped us in the hallway just so he could introduce us to every member of his student council. Evidently, we didn’t “oooo” and “ahhh” sufficiently because he offered to pay our admission to watch him play a ballgame.

  Although it was really rude, I declined for both of us, grabbed her arm and pulled her away. I refused to stand by idly while he attempted to impress her. I’ve got other major plans for her relationship future. None of those include him in any way.

  So I have spent most of my time dragging Willow away from him any chance I get. I have inconspicuously helped her dodge Eli and managed to thwart his dating advances. Maybe he will…

  “You’ve been extremely quiet here lately. Are you okay?” Eli commented to me, interrupting my thoughts.

  “What…Ember…quiet?? Dude, that’s a first and knowing her it won’t last long,” Jeff stated, comically.

  “You should be very worried too, because Tray will certainly tell you when I get too quiet I’m planning my next big conquest. This one’s called ‘Jeff’s Wipe Out’,” I told him in a serious tone.

  Then, I wadded up a napkin and hurled it intentionally over his head. It narrowly missed Ally and landed in Tisha’s lap.

  “I’m getting in on that action, girl…” Ally announced her side and the lunchtime Wipe Out was on.