Legions

by Karice Bolton

  “Then as I was placing the book back on the shelf a searing pain began, which I recognized immediately. I knew he was staring at me. I turned quickly to glance in his direction, and I saw him staring directly at me. I looked away quickly, but it was too late. Our eyes met – locked rather. The odd part was that I couldn’t tell if I saw recognition in his eyes or fear. Regardless, it made him run. Something that struck me, however, was that I noticed his eyes flit over to the prismatic colors on the wall that I was projecting. I don’t know if that was coincidence, or if he actually recognized the luminescence. Then he grabbed his coat and the notebook he was writing in and took off.”

  I was crushing my body against the cushions probably hoping I’d dissolve into the fabric and not face the ridiculing I was halfway expecting from Arie and Cyril. The tension in my body kept mounting.

  “So, this is the part that has been concerning me. I can tell you in my previous existence I had no clue about anything until you showed up that night. I’m not sure Athen is as oblivious. That has me worried.”

  Arie sat forward, suddenly even more concerned, which I didn’t think was possible.

  “What do you mean, Ana?” She asked.

  There was a long pause as I tried to figure out the best way to come out with it. I decided to be blunt. Get it over with.

  “All of the books on the table were on Angels and Demons.” I looked at them for some sign.

  “…And he rode away on a Ducati Diaveli.”

  “The bike he was going to get… Wow. It’s like his worlds are somehow colliding. He isn’t sure which is which. Truthfully, I’m not sure I know either.” Cyril finally spoke.

  “Have you ever heard of this? I didn’t think it was possible.” I asked them both.

  “No. This isn’t anything I even thought possible either. You know, in a way, maybe there’s a reason this happened. Maybe we were taking the wrong approach. If he thinks something is going on maybe he’s more receptive than he would be otherwise. Our chances might be better this way.”

  “Are you only saying that to make me feel better?” I asked Arie.

  “No, I wouldn’t do that. I’m serious. I think we’re going to use this to our advantage. Tomorrow is still going to happen. The training needs to begin.” She said, winking at me.

  “Huh. This isn’t how I pictured this conversation going. I must admit I’m relieved.” I said, trying my best at a smile.

  “Well, let’s hope we’re right. Now’s the time to put our little saying to the test, all things happen for a reason. Let’s start dinner so we can get to bed early.” She said slapping Cyril on the knee and bounding up, almost back to her old self.

  I was so thankful for Arie’s positive attitude. I, once again, felt a multitude of emotions ranging from despair to great anticipation in a matter of hours. I really needed someone like her to give me hope. I was exhausted and seeing Athen today made the agony even worse. I missed him beyond anything I thought possible.

  “Thanks for not making me feel even worse than I already do by the way.” I told them both as we headed for the kitchen.

  I could feel Cyril patting my shoulder, and I turned to him and hugged him.

  “I’m truly so sorry.”

  “Don’t be. I’m sure you’re beating up yourself far more than anyone could ever do. I know Athen did.”

  Hearing those words made me want to shrink into myself and hide. That’s exactly what I dreaded - a comparison between our two situations.

  “You’re right on that one, Cyril.”

  Even by going to bed early, sleep would not come. I tossed and turned. Every little noise shot me right up. Athen was on the tip of every thought that was floating through my brain. After seeing him earlier, all I could think of was how to rectify what I had done, and I was confused as to why I would so easily fall into the same pattern that he had decades earlier when trying to get me back. The thought of being without him for decades made me shiver under my covers. It also gave me an entirely new set of circumstances to worry about.

  Arie had told me that one of the factors with my rephasing was that Athen interrupted the process too early, playing a role in me being away from the family for so many decades. I hoped I didn’t fall into the same pattern, but it felt like it may have already begun to happen. I had no idea what came over me. Now that I was away from him, I could think straight again – kind of. I could now recognize that I should not ever have risked it, but the pull I felt was something that I couldn’t resist.

  My mind kept wandering back to his eyes. They were lacking the green that I was so accustomed to, but he was still amazingly beautiful. The entire set of circumstances seemed surreal. It was like I could feel him next to me right now. I wanted him so badly to be near me tonight, to feel a kiss against my lips or his fingers against my neck. My mind, finally letting itself believe in the possibility of being with him again, allowed sleep to enter into my veins at long last.

  Chapter 7

  We were strolling the grounds of Butchart Gardens, taking in all of the beauty that nature and horticulturists had to offer, winding from one magnificent garden area to the next. All of the paths led from one awesome spectacle of nature to the next. Everything was so tidily groomed. Even though we were on the edge of winter, leading into spring, the gardens were absolutely beautiful. The deciduous trees arched their limbs, directing you to view the tiered perfection of pruned conifers. Tiny grape hyacinths were beginning to make their appearance under the dark green ferns. The Sunken Garden overlook was breathtaking. I could only imagine how incredible it would be when everything was in full bloom and someone I loved was standing beside me, holding me.

  Cyril and Arie had walked down the path, heading towards the Bog Garden, and I decided to lag behind a little bit. I did my best to keep my emotions at bay and scolded myself for the little snags of jealousy that entered my brain as Cyril and Arie held each other so closely walking the path to my first training ground. That wasn’t a side of myself that I wanted to explore, but it kept reappearing.

  I took a deep breath in, feeling the cold, fresh air permeate my insides, reminding me that I really was alive, even though I felt as dull and alone as one could probably get. Every breath was a heavy effort, betraying my own senses. Looking down on the beauty of everything made me want Athen next to me so badly it hurt. The wind began picking up a little, signaling for me to follow Cyril and Arie to our destination. I wasn’t sure why they picked the bogs but assumed there must be a good reason. Realizing the wind wasn’t calming down, I zipped my jacket up and pulled the hood over my head. Doing my best to snap out of my woe is me attitude, I jogged to catch up to Arie and Cyril, praying that the training would get me out of my element.

  “Hey! Wait up!” I was close to catching up to them, but they were gracious and slowed down so I didn’t wear myself out before the training even had begun.

  The clouds started parting a little but not enough to make up for the fact that the trees were larger and the gardens more towering to block the light. I followed them as they briskly moved off the path to exactly where we weren’t supposed to be. My heart began to quicken a little at the thought of getting caught as we traipsed further into the bog, but really that should be the least of my worries.

  When we were far enough out of view, Arie and Cyril stopped and spun around.

  “Well, are ya ready?” Cyril asked.

  “Sure.” I had barely stopped walking when he grabbed me and swung me behind him climbing up the lichen drenched tree. Within seconds, we were at the tiptop of the tree staring down at Arie.

  “You’ve got to be kidding.” I uttered.

  “Ah, that’s nothing. Wait until you don’t need a tree.” Cyril said, his smile as wide as I had seen it in a long time.

  I rolled my eyes as he let go of the tree, descending quicker than I thought possible and making my stomach arrive to greet my throat, before he quickly slowed us down to gently arrive on the marshy grounds awaiting our arrival.


  “Wow. I don’t know how much of that I can handle at once.” Still trying to catch my breath from the fear and excitement of the Cyril-made thrill ride.

  “Your turn!” Arie announced emphatically.

  “Right. That’s a real possibility. Why didn’t I think of that sooner?” I blew out my cheeks, pretending I was reaching for the sky with my arms extending.

  Arie obviously not impressed, grabbed my waist and sprouted from tree limb to tree limb barely touching any of them, creating a slosh of movement in my gut. Once reaching the top, she too let go, leaving me to do nothing but close my eyes until we reached the safety of the bog. Knowing that this was going to continue until I tried to figure out what they were doing, I decided to try my hand at it.

  I squished my way over to the tree that they both had been using for the elevator rides, now understanding why they chose a bog. It was Mother Nature’s own mattress, patiently waiting for me to fall on my butt.

  “Good one, guys.” I closed my eyes and reached my arms up to the sky like they had done – only nothing happened. I didn’t move at all, not even a hop. I opened one eye to see Cyril and Arie chuckling.

  “Laughing with me, not at me right, guys?”

  “Oh, most definitely. It’s a shame Athen’s missing out, truly.” Cyril laughed. It felt like a knife was inserted into my spine hearing those words.

  “True.” Was all that I could mumble aloud.

  “Nice one, Cy. Now go help her.” Arie pushed him towards me as his boot got sucked back down into the marsh, creating a swallowing sound with a squirt.

  “Ewww! You’re forgiven after that.” I knew he hadn’t meant anything, and he was right. I wished Athen was here to see it too – but he wasn’t.

  “Alright, so what you want to do is feel it in your spine. Your whole being, really. Feel the tree, know where you want to go and imagine it as you take your first step. Don’t think about the process to get there – just imagine yourself already there. Picture your foot on that branch already leaving for the next one.”

  Not realizing how scrunched up my eyebrows must have been, Arie stepped in and tried explaining it instead.

  “So, you know that feeling right before you’re about to jump? You get that little feeling of excitement and exhilaration building up. Capture it and spring with all of your might. Go towards your target like you can’t miss.”

  Ziplining in Whistler with Athen popped into my head. That feeling of floating, gliding down the mountain – but more importantly - that feeling right before you step your foot off the ledge was what began making an entrance to my extremities- getting the jitters started. Having the built up energy and tingling that started in the base of my toes traveling like the speed of light to match my mind’s anticipation, I allowed myself to experience something beyond myself. I nodded at them both and remembered that this was for Athen. Everything I did was for Athen. My hand found its way to the tree trunk, feeling the wetness that was releasing from the verdigris sponge wrapping itself around the tree. I knew where I wanted to be, where I wanted to go, and felt my body’s movement as the power began to build up in my calves, quickly moving towards my spine as I hurled myself towards my target.

  Excitement began replacing fear as my body darted from one tree limb to the next without missing a step. The freedom was beginning to overtake my soul as the heaviness of the moment made itself known. I was no longer an observer. I was a participant in this fight. I reached the top of the tree and suddenly realized that I had no idea what to do next. I looked down to see Cyril and Arie waving me down. I knew what they wanted me to do and hoped with everything that now was the time to trust them.

  I let go of the tree feeling my body glide down from the sky, sailing against the wind as my hand grasped onto nothingness. This was only the beginning, but I was ready for more – much more. I felt my feet touch the soggy earth as my knees buckled with the unexpected weight of gravity. This life was sensational.

  Chapter 8

  The morning was a beautiful one in Victoria. The grey sky had rolled back its grasp on the city leaving brilliant blue skies, and I only hoped that was a sign for the day to come. My dreams were so vivid I almost thought I was awake and with Athen. The woman we saw in the Starbucks was with Athen in my dreams, but what made it a dream instead of a nightmare was that he looked deep into her eyes and asked her to leave him alone. The setting was a sterile one; I’m guessing the hospital. I only hoped it wasn’t a dream but reality. I had a new stirring within me at the thought of him rejecting the woman who had suddenly made me fault my self-image in comparison. The thought of her evil eyes interpreting his discarding of her made me almost giddy with delight.

  I decided to go let Arie and Cyril in on my dream. I was hoping they wouldn’t talk me out of my theory. The slight gnawing feeling that this could be my hopefulness outweighing my visions was something I discarded quickly.

  They were both already at the table eating a bagel they split between them and slurping down coffee. Obviously, the pep in my step couldn’t be missed.

  “Well?” Arie pulled the chair back for me. “What’s got you in such a great mood? Was it the training?” She asked amused. This new positive energy certainly wasn’t something that was exuding from me as of late.

  “I had a wonderful dream that I’m hoping isn’t a dream at all.” I grabbed an orange out of the fruit bowl and began hastily peeling it. The fact that my hunger had resurfaced certainly was a sign of things changing – good things.

  “Fill us in!” Cyril exclaimed, pushing back his chair to go refill his coffee cup. I quickly scanned the kitchen and was thankful that it was so bright and cheery to fit my mood of the moment.

  “Okay! You know that thing woman, whatever, I keep seeing in my visions with Athen?” I didn’t want to give her any human qualities any longer.

  “Yah, what about her?” Arie asked, eyes curious.

  “Last night in my dream, he rejected her. FINALLY! Do you think it is wishful thinking or a possibility?”

  “Judging by your mood, I would trust your gut. This could be a really good thing.” Cyril was scouring the fridge, obviously the half a bagel didn’t cut it.

  “Are you just saying that?” Not wanting to hear the answer.

  “Nope.” Cyril found his next morning snack of hard boiled eggs. “This kind of opens up the possibility of getting things started sooner rather than later still. For some reason, he seems more receptive than I ever thought possible. I’m dying to know why, though.”

  “Leave it to my brother.” Arie said, her grin showing through her last bite of bagel. “I think he knew more than we thought when he was taken from us. It’s almost like he set up clues for himself or something. I don’t know – maybe that’s just bits of crazy talk. The memsors haven’t ever actually worked for anyone that I know of.”

  “What the heck are memsors?” I was totally puzzled.

  “Supposedly, we have the ability to leave memories in this world before we go to the next. Meaning, if we somehow know harm is coming our way, we can make it so when we wake up in the next life, our ‘pretend life’, there are clues that can trigger the memories of who we truly are. It doesn’t really work though - or hasn’t in the past.”

  “That would make sense with his research habits wouldn’t it? Why didn’t you guys mention it before?” I asked.

  Cyril was standing behind Arie rubbing her neck, and a little twinge of jealousy entered my body for which I felt complete shame.

  “I really didn’t let myself consider it as valid possibility until enough incidents started stacking up, I guess. We didn’t want to get your hopes up for no reason, but I guess, at this point, it doesn’t matter. We can all be excited or devastated as a unit depending on which way this thing turns out.” Cyril said, only half joking.

  “Huh, well I’m going to take this as a positive sign and let myself float through the day in a happy mood for once until I do some other stupid move to knock me off my feet.”


  “Sounds good to me, sweetie.” Arie was getting up from the kitchen table, reaching for the plate that the bagel once made home, and Cyril reached over her arm and grabbed it first. He treated her like such a queen, like Athen treated me. My heart ached as I commanded myself to listen to my seconds earlier advice.

  Chapter 9

  I was driving along Highway 14 on my way to Botanical Beach to escape from everything. My thoughts, my worries, my family, my inability to get Athen back – everything was overwhelming, and the house felt confining – this was my escape. I needed some time by myself, and this drive was providing just that.

  The music was blaring as loud as my ears could handle with my favorite playlist going of indie and alternative music that I always found comfort in. Doing my best to sing along with most songs, I began to feel free again. The weight of the last few weeks beginning to slowly drift away as I internalized the lyrics, flipping from one song to another. Imagining Athen and I together listening to these songs, messing around to these songs and doing absolutely nothing but enjoying our time together, with music serenading us in the background, made me enthralled at what I was about to attempt by myself. It was going to be my own form of therapy.

  With the pavement wet from the morning’s last rainfall, I was extra cautious as I turned sharp corner after corner, zigzagging back and forth following the shiny, grey surface leading to my own training ground. The views of the Strait of Juan De Fuca were beautiful as glimpse after glimpse was offered up through the breaks in the large trees that were shadowing the highway. The sea was beautiful and was beckoning me to continue on my journey. Every mile closer to the park brought me reassurance that I was making the right choice. I needed time away from everything and everyone to practice what I had learned at the bog.