Zombie Slayer (A Kate Brokenshire Zombie Slayer Adventure Book 0)

by Garth Ono

  Twisting the sword around, forcing the zombies head to twist and turn, Kate put the zombie on the ground. Then she pressed the pistol to the woman's throat and pulled the trigger until the slider locked back. Empty.

  The zombie went limp and all rage slowly bled out of her eyes. Kate had severed the spinal cord with at least one shot. Even so, she quickly pulled the blade out and cut off the zombie's head. Only then did she relax.

  "Good job," Johnny said, dripping in blood. "I killed mine, too." He paused to wipe blood off his face. "He looks a lot worse."

  They took another half hour to search the farm for more zombies. When they didn't find any more, they dragged the headless bodies down to the street. Then Kate took a picture of four corpses lined up. She e-mailed that picture and the GPS coordinates to the County Coroner's office. A team would come out to pick them up.

  "How did you know to do that?"

  "I watched the sheriff do it each time I called in a kill," she said. "So I'm just doing it myself. You know, like a real badass zombie slayer would." She wagged her brows. "And it pays much better than my waitress job."

  "You're the real deal, babe," Johnny said, grinning like an idiot, all covered in blood.

  Chapter 6

  "Yes!" Kate cried, leaping to her feet in front of the TV. "Hurry!"

  Middlesbrough had the ball. The Liverpool players scrambled to get between them and their goalie. The clock was ticking away the last seconds of the game. Middlesbrough was down by one point.

  "Take a shot! Take a shot!"

  As the last seconds tick away, the player finally kicked the ball. Kate gasped, holding her breath as she watched it streak across the screen… And the Liverpool goalie caught it.

  "Aaggh. Why!" she cried, dropping to her knees.

  "Aw, you're so cute when you watch English football," her mother said.

  "Mum. Middlesbrough lost," she said.

  "How did Chelsea do?"

  Kate sighed. Her mother never watched. She probably didn't know how the game was played. She wasn't sure her mother knew how American football was played either. She only liked Chelsea because she liked their name. Kate's middle name was Chelsea.

  "They won," she admitted reluctantly.

  "That's wonderful," her mother said and continued on to the kitchen.

  Kate turned off the TV. Her father was out hunting with friends. Sunday was her parents' fun day. They worked their butts off six days a week during the school year, including many nights due to school functions like athletic events. So after a morning hunting, her father would spend the afternoon watching the game she just watched. He never got into American football, which was what Kate would watch that afternoon.

  "Bears are playing the Cowboys in Chicago," she said. Both teams had the same record, but the media predicted the Cowboys would win by three. "They always give the Cowboys the advantage. Stupid America's team."

  Kate was a Chicago Bears fan now that the St Louis Rams moved back to LA.

  She looked through the window at all of the new snow and smiled. The Bears had to be better in the cold than the Cowboys from Texas. She was confident in a win for her team.

  "I bet Dad is freezing his arse off," she muttered as she headed for her bedroom. Her father wasn't a fan of the cold. She was surprised he didn't settle in Florida or California when he came to America. "Might be a good day for me to stay inside, too."

  After closing her door, Kate opened her laptop and started checking her favorite blogs. It was weird having a weekend off, but one of the full-time waitresses was sick during the week and needed to make up hours. Kate volunteered to be off, since she had that sweet zombie slaying income on the side.

  "I should start a business. Kate's Zombie Slaying Service. Have zombies? We slay them," she said. "That would be so cool."

  It already felt like she was in the zombie extermination business. To her parents' astonishment, and deep displeasure, people in town were starting to call her instead of the police when they spotted a zombie. She was almost earning enough in bounties to live on her own. Last month she earned a total of $1850, before taxes. That was the most money she'd ever earned.

  Her phone rang. It was on the desk beside her laptop. Kate glanced at the screen. It was Daphne. She frowned. Why would she call instead of text? She answered.

  "Hey, Daffy Duck."

  "Hi, slayer girl," Daphne replied. "How did your date with Johnny go last night? Did he kiss you?"

  "No," she said. "He got drunk and tried to kiss me."

  "Oh, I'm sorry," she said, sounding a lot sadder than Kate felt. Daphne's father's voice boomed in the background. Kate couldn't make out what he said. Her friend sighed dramatically. "I have to go."

  "Where are you going?"

  "Stupid church."

  Kate laughed. "I don't think you're allowed to even think that, much less say it."

  "Oops, did I say that out loud? My bad. Gotta go," Daphne said. "Love ya, girl."

  Her parents weren't church goers, so neither was Kate. She used to go with Daphne's family. Kate loved Sunday School, but after returning from the previous year in England, Kate never got back into church going. She lost the spark.

  Though, the idea of dressing up nice once a week still did appeal to her. Unfortunately, her idea of dressing up might shock the church crowd. She was pretty sure skin tight mini-dresses and sky high stilettos were frowned upon by most churches. They were certainly frowned upon by her parents.

  Sundays were for sports. Johnny called the previous night to invite her to go zombie hunting. He liked to drive around looking for them. That didn't appeal to her. Kate preferred to be called to a confirmed sighting. Thoughts of starting a zombie extermination business filled her head again. Did enough zombies pass through the area to earn her enough in bounties to support herself?

  The phone rang again. Kate answered without looking, "Got Zombies?"

  She froze as soon as the words left her lips. That was the perfect name for her zombie slaying business. Kate almost forgot she was on a phone call.

  "Hello? Is this Kate Brokenspear?"

  It was a man. She didn't recognize his voice, and the phone showed unknown caller.

  "Brokenshire. Kate Brokenshire," she said. "But yes. How can I help you?"

  "Yes. Do you get rid of zombies over here in Lone Oak?" he said. "I have one in my chicken coop. The stupid bastard has killed all of my chickens and can't seem to get out."

  He sounded more frustrated than anything. Lone Oak was just twenty minutes from Tennyson and in the same county.

  "Sure, I can help you."

  Kate got his name and address. Her phone had his number. She dressed warmly: jeans, long-sleeve flannel shirt, hunting boots. After stuffing her rain suit in her book bag, she put on an old coat and left. As expected, her mother saw the book bag and thought it was okay.

  I wonder how long it'll take her to figure it out, Kate wondered. My parents are bad for business.

  She jumped into her car. It was a gray, ten year old Toyota Corolla. She just bought it last week, thanks to her zombie slaying income. She had to continue working to pay for gas and insurance.

  There was a light snow falling by the time she reached the Hagar's place just outside of Lone Oak. It usually didn't snow that early in the year in Tennyson, but she loved it. Well, she loved the way it looked. It was terribly cold.

  "Hello, Mr. Hagar," she greeted the homeowner.

  He was younger than she expected, maybe early thirties. His wife and two kids watched them through the window. Mike Hagar was tall, dark, and rather handsome. Kate didn't blame his wife for keeping an eye on him.

  "Yes, thanks for coming out, Kate," he said. Pointing to the back, "We have five acres and keep horses and chickens. I've checked the barn and there aren't any zombies inside. We keep the doors locked at night. Unfortunately, a zombie got stuck inside our chicken coop."

  "I'll take care of it," she said. "There is a $25 dollar service call fee."

  He
handed her a twenty and ten. "Keep the change. Also, you will remove the whole body, right?"

  "I just take the head. The County Coroner has a retrieval team that is very prompt."

  Mr. Hagar wasn't pleased. He insisted she removed the entire body. His wife was freaking out. Kate thought maybe he was the one freaking out. She reluctantly agreed to remove the corpse from his property before leaving.

  Dammit.

  So Kate e-mailed the Coroner's office retrieval team to request a pickup before she even headed to the chicken coop. Kate brought a machete and the sawed off shotgun that her late grandfather left her. She was supposed to use the shotgun for personal protection when she moved out of the house. Her late grandfather even named the gun, Lupara.

  Lupara was Italian for a sawed off shotgun. It was a double-barrel 12-gauge. The stock was removed, leaving it with a handgrip that looked like one of those ancient flintlock pistols she saw in pirate movies. Kate thought it was the coolest thing and loved firing it at the range.

  That job would be the first time she'd use it for real.

  Kate added a long shoulder strap, and even ordered a shotgun shell bandolier off the internet. The bandolier hadn't arrived yet, so she stuffed extra ammo in her pockets. Before she left the car she had to straighten the machete's blade with her foot. It was constantly bending.

  Trudging to the chicken coop, she heard the zombie before she spotted him. He was thrashing around, pounding on the door. It was a simple latch, but beyond his undead brain. Which she found amusing. Zombies could open doors, so doorknobs were not beyond their capacity. The latch was even simpler.

  "Someone must've left the door ajar," she muttered. "Or he's stupid even by zombie standards."

  The zombie threw himself against the door trying to get to her. Most chicken coops she'd seen had simple chicken wire walls. That one had chicken wire under hog wire. She assumed the owners were trying to keep predators out. They caught a zombie instead.

  She grinned at him. He was a tall, slim man. A good portion of his scalp was missing, showing raw bone. Kate had a hard time looking him in the face, because he was the most decayed monster she'd ever seen. The flesh was just falling off of him. On top of that, he was covered in feathers.

  "One of us is definitely not winning in life," she said. "Hello, my lovely little rotter. Ready to die again?"

  Kate realized she could press her shotgun up against the door, just inches from his throat, and blow him away. That would splatter flesh and blood all over the chicken coop's interior. Probably damage the door even more and piss off her client.

  "Let's do this the hard way," she said. Kate kicked the latch and the door swung open. "Come to Mummy, my little darling."

  She backed away, Lupara held firmly at her hip. The rotter came after her, moving slowly at first. It was unnerving how he was fixated on her. At that moment his only reason to exist was to kill her.

  Kate backed a good twenty to thirty feet from the coop. There she stood her ground. The zombie lurched at her the instant she stopped moving.

  Boom!

  She hit him right in the heart. The zombie was knocked to his back, arms and legs moving in the air for a long moment. Kate didn't wait for him to figure it out and find his feet. She rushed up to his side, pressed the barrel to his throat, and pulled the other trigger.

  Boom!

  The zombie went limp. She watched the enraged life bleed out of his eyes while she reloaded. The slayer smiled. That second shot blew away his spine, so he was effectively decapitated. She still had to chop his head the rest of the way off to turn it in for the bounty, but she didn't have to do it there.

  "Easiest $75 I've ever earned."

  It got harder. Kate had to drag him by his feet all of the way down to the road. Then she used the machete to chop off his head. By the time she had the head double bagged in black plastic trash bags, and stuffed in her trunk, the County Coroner's retrieval team arrived.

  "Holy crap, so you're Kate Brokenshire?" the driver said. He was a tall, medium build black man. She guessed he was around thirty years old. "Wow. You're mighty hot for a slayer."

  "You should see my sister," Kate said.

  A small redhead joined them. She had the most cheerful, freckled face woman Kate had ever seen, and looked only a few years older than Kate. The driver introduced himself as Richard Cooper, and his co-worker was Stephanie Parker.

  "You've been busy, too," Mr. Cooper said. "We get more zombie pickup requests from you than anyone else."

  "Hey, I'm an overachiever," she said with a shrug. "Thanks for the prompt pickup."

  Her phone rang. "Hello, Got Zombies?" she answered. "Kate Brokenshire speaking. How may I help you?"

  "Oh wonderful," a woman said. "I have two zombies in my backyard. How fast can you come over?"

  Kate got the woman's name and address, discussed her fees, and promised to be there in ten minutes. Then she grinned at the retrieval team.

  "You might want to head toward Tennyson."

  Chapter 7

  The bell over the diner's door tinkled. Kate paused to look up at it. In a way she was going to miss it.

  There were four patrons sitting at three tables. The two regular waitresses, Sally Ford and Amy Jones, were working. It was early afternoon, just after school. The lull before the storm, for soon the dinner crowd would descend upon them.

  "Hi," Kate said. "Is Mr. Chambers available?"

  Amy called back into the kitchen. Her boss came out wiping his hands on a towel. Kate smiled brightly at him.

  "Let me guess, you're quitting?" he said.

  "How did you know?"

  "Why else would you come here today?" he said. Her boss frowned. "Is there anything I can do to change your mind?"

  "Not really," she said, and almost giggled. Kate was so excited. She handed him one of the fliers in her hand. "I started my own business."

  Kate had worked hours on that flyer. She created it on her laptop, and then used up all of her ink printing up copies. In big letters, it said, "Got Zombies?" Below that was a drawing of a zombie, with a red circle and slash over it. Under the picture, it read, "Call Kate Brokenshire" and her phone number.

  "Got Zombies?" he read. "Oh, Jesus. Do your parents know you're doing this?"

  "Yes. They are not pleased," she said. "But I turned eighteen yesterday, so I'm legally allowed to screw up my entire life. At least that's how they see it."

  Mr. Chambers chuckled and handed the flier back. Kate noticed everyone in the diner was watching and listening. That meant the gossip machine was about to go crazy on her. Soon everyone in town would know. Perfect.

  "Do you mind if I put my flier up on your bulletin board?"

  "Knock yourself out," he said. "Good luck. And, please, be safe."

  After pinning up her flyer, Kate continued along downtown asking the shops with bulletin boards if she could put up hers. She also stapled flyers to telephone poles around town.

  She noticed people looking and pointing at her. She knew it was more scandal and morbid fascination than admiration, but if it drummed up business she was all onboard.

  Kate smiled as she looked up and down Main Street. "Bring on the zombies."

  THE END

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  Please consider leaving a review on the site where you purchased this story, or comment directly to me via e-mail or on my Facebook page.

  You can contact me at:

  garthono@outlook.com

  Check out these other stories by Garth Ono:

  Lady Justice and the Zombie Apocalypse

  Kate Brokenshire Zombie Slayer:

  Zombie Slayer

  Stand and Deliver

  Stone Cold Vengeance

  Master of the City (Coming in Feb 2017)

  About Garth Ono:

  He served 7 years in the US Army (11th ACR Blackhorse Regiment, 2nd Armored Division, and 8th Infantry Division, in that order) as a Cavalry Scout. After the Army he went back to school and had a w
ide variety of jobs, all in the electronics field, but now he is a full time writer. He shares his life with his wife and their two dogs.

  Table of Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  The End

  About the author

  Back to Table of Contents