Sweetest Obsessions - Anthology

by Anthony, Jane

My socks are still sopping wet, and my shoes squish when I stomp them on the rocks.

  “Damn, I hate wet feet,” Carter grumbles as he joins me on a boulder jutting up from the shore as I tug my life vest back on. He sits and takes his socks off, wringing the water out of them. “Look, my feet are all pruny.”

  I giggle and turn my head away quickly as he tries to touch me with his toes. “No, please don’t ask me to look at your feet. Feet are just ugly.”

  “Well, I know a certain someone who has the sexiest feet in the world. They’re perfectly petite and beautifully arched. Mmmm, sensual as fuck, especially with that gold toe ring and gorgeous plum polish on them. I just might have to suck on those toes later.”

  I arch a high eyebrow and twist my lips in uncertainty. “I don’t think so. That’s kind of gross.”

  “You won’t think it’s so gross when I make you writhe with pleasure.”

  “You make me writhe with pleasure no matter what you do, but you will not stick my toes in your mouth.” I grin at him, which only causes him to wink.

  “We’ll see about that,” he says, reaching to swat my ass.

  I dance out of his reach and head toward the boat, my ass swaying for him. His chuckle sounds off behind me, which only makes me wiggle my ass just a bit more for him. He seems to be feeling better, which is a relief.

  At least, maybe I can breathe for a moment and enjoy the rest of this trip.

  33

  Carter

  I shove my socks and shoes on quickly in an effort to chase after her and her sexy swaying ass, but my fucking toes are tingling, and my hands are stiff. My head swoons with dizziness from the quick motion of getting to my feet, and I fall off the rock, landing hard on my hip. Not wanting her to know I’ve fallen, I push myself up to run but end up hobbling like an eighty-year-old man all the way to the raft.

  Fucking pathetic.

  I know she’s worrying herself sick about me. I wish she wouldn’t. It makes everything that much more painful.

  Gingerly, I climb into the raft and sit beside her. She immediately winds her fingers through mine and smiles at me.

  She’s so beautiful I could cry. I’m luckier than I should be. If nothing else, if this procedure kills me later in the week, at least I can go out knowing I know what it means to love and be loved.

  Who am I kidding? That only makes it worse.

  “Ready?” Bo calls out as Derek settles in. He looks as sick as I feel.

  “Ready,” Derek says with a shaky smile.

  God bless him for doing this for me. I give Bo a nod, my hand twitching in Teddy’s. She slides closer to me.

  “How are you feeling?”

  “Baby, just enjoy this for me, OK? I’m fine.” I’m a damn liar. I’m not fine. I’m dizzy. Sick. My vision is blurry, and there’s this strange buzzing inside of me.

  I say a silent prayer that the rafting trip ends quickly. Teddy was right. We shouldn’t have gone.

  We shove off the bank, and in moments, we’re speeding across the water, our bodies bouncing all over. Teddy clings to me as much as I’m clinging to her. The buzzing grows louder. It’s like there are a million angry bees inside my head. Cold water splashes me in the face. It doesn’t do a bit of good. I blink rapidly, trying to clear my vision.

  I let out a whimper as my body weakens, the twitching growing to uncontrollable levels.

  “T-t-t-t-t-ed-d-dy,” I choke out.

  God no. Not like this! Not in the middle of no-fucking-where!

  My gaze is locked on her as she smiles and whoops with excitement. If I’m going to die, I want her to be the last thing I see.

  34

  Teddy

  “Hell fire and damnation,” I holler to Carter. “Woo! That run was awesome!”

  The river smooths out for a bit, and I shift so I can hug Carter. He’s stiff as a board. “Carter. Carter? What’s wrong?” I shake him, bile rising in my throat.

  Carter’s body begins to tremble, his eyes rolling back in his head. He slumps over, and I catch him, my screams for help echoing around us.

  Derek turns and looks at us, his eyes wide with fright. “Bo, Help!”

  Bo springs into action, powering down the engine so we drift over the water. “Lie him down, slowly. I think he’s having a seizure.”

  Derek and I flatten Carter out on the mesh floor of the cataraft. His body is cold. It violently shakes. Ugly white foam tinged with bright red blood seeps from his mouth.

  “Pull a blanket out of that bin in the far corner,” Bo instructs one of us. “And grab something soft to protect his head.” Derek jumps up to do what he asks.

  “Carter!” I beg over and over, tears streaming down my face. “Please, Carter, come back, baby.”

  Carter’s breathing is labored, as his body continues to tremble.

  Bo and Derek roll him onto his side to help him breathe easier.

  “Is he an epileptic?” Bo asks.

  “No,” I choke out through my sobs. “He’s not. Right, Derek?” I look to Derek for confirmation as we cover Carter’s shuddering body.

  “No, he’s not an epileptic. He’s got—" Derek swallows the words. “He’s stressed out.”

  “Derek, please. Please. You have to tell us. He could die. Carter could die!”

  Derek’s eyes shoot to Carter, who’s rasping on the floor of the raft, his head in my lap.

  “Derek, I like you. I really do, but please, you have to tell us.”

  Derek’s shoulders slump in defeat. “I swore I wouldn’t. I can’t tell you.”

  I let out a frustrated growl, ready to come across the raft and beat the answers from my friend.

  “I need to know so I can treat him properly or call for help,” Bo says, looking directly into Derek’s eyes.

  Derek hesitates, looking down at Carter. Carter’s pale face makes him almost unrecognizable.

  Derek’s eyes volley back and forth from Bo to mine.

  “Please, Derek. Please?” I beg once more. “This secret could kill him. I love him, Derek. Please.”

  “He’s got stage four IDH-wildtype glioblastomas,” he blurts out.

  I open and close my mouth several times in shock. I would’ve never guessed that. My heart sinks. It’s worse than I thought. So much worse. Tears fall from my eyes and land on Carter’s face. His brown eyes are fixed on my face, but he’s not there. His breathing is labored and shallowed. An ugly sob rips through my body as I clutch Carter’s trembling form.

  “Huh? In layman’s terms please,” Bo says, feeling for Carter’s pulse.

  “He has brain cancer,” I choke out at the same time Derek answers.

  Bo is grim and looks at his watch. “When was the last time he gave any signs of awareness?”

  “Uh, umm.” I temple my fingers to my forehead trying to think.

  I peer at Derek, and he shrugs his shoulders, not knowing. “He turned and smiled at me before we went down that last run,” I say.

  “OK, good to know.” Bo glances around on both sides of the shoreline and finally sees a sign for Separation Canyon. He grabs the two-way radio, holding the button and speaks, “Mayday, Mayday, Mayday. This is Grandview Tours boat 9. Repeat. This is Grandview Tours boat 9. Again. This is Grandview Tours boat 9. Echo. Charlie. Echo. Niner. Zero. Niner. Mayday.” He releases the button to listen.

  “Go ahead, Grandview Tours Boat 9,” a voice crackles back.

  I dry the water from Carter’s face. He’s still shaking, just not as harshly.

  “Carter, please. Come on, baby. Please,” I whisper hoarsely, clinging to him.

  Derek’s warm hand is on my shoulder as he tries to offer me comfort. I can’t believe this is happening.

  Take me instead!

  It’s a silent plea that’s on repeat in my head.

  “This is Bo Ashwood requesting immediate assistance for a medical emergency.”

  “State your emergency,” the voice requests.

  “Patron is experiencing a grand mal seizure. Status
is unresponsive. Current location is Separation Canyon. Request 9-1-1 call and a MediVac at Pearce Ferry. Time out is approximately seven minutes.”

  “Roger that. Grandview Tours boat 9. Please maintain the channel for updates.” Bo powers up the engine, and I sit behind Carter, holding him close to me as we race over the water.

  Tears are still running wild down my face. Let them fall. I don’t care who sees them. This man—he’s my whole world now. I know we’ve only been together a short time, but we’ve made it count. He’s become such a deep part of who I want to be and the future I want for us. I can’t lose him now. Ugly scenarios rush through my head.

  I can’t lose him. I only just found him! Please, God! Please!

  Derek sits facing me and helps to support him as he continues to shake.

  “Hey, he’s going to be fine, Teddy. He’s a fighter. Always has been. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about his illness before. You did deserve to know. This past year has been rough. After his dad died, he lost sight of what he was fighting for. He’s tired of being the asshole the New York City real estate market requires. I think in finding you, he’s found his purpose again. He wants more.”

  I nod wordlessly, knowing if I open my mouth, only sobs of despair will come out. Instead, I press my hand to Carter’s chest and feel the rise and fall of his shallow breathing. His eyes have drifted closed.

  “Hang in there, Carter,” I bend low and murmur into his ear, praying he can understand me. “Everything’s going to be fine. We’ve-we’ve got help coming. I love you. I love you so fucking much.”

  Bo keeps peeking over his shoulder at us. I give him an unsteady thumbs up sign when I check Carter’s pulse rate and find it faint but steady.

  God, please bring him back to me. Give him the strength to fight this battle and all the other’s coming his way. He’s a good man with many faults. He’s working hard to right the wrongs in his life, and just needs a second chance.

  The raft takes a hard left as we round another bend and enter into the wide opening where the Colorado River runs into Lake Mead. We bounce over hard waves as Bo races to save Carter’s life.

  Derek fishes Carter’s phone from his pocket and slides it into his.

  Lights flash, and sirens blare across the rushing water at me from the distant shore. In the distance, the faint slapping of helicopter blades has my eyes searching the horizon, but I can’t see anything in the bright light of day.

  As we approach the landing, I can finally make out the medics waiting for us with a stretcher and bright orange medic totes. Bo revs down the motor as we approach, but we still come in a little too fast and splash a few onlookers waiting to see what the commotion is all about.

  The medics rush in and load Carter onto a stretcher. It takes Derek’s hand on mine to get me to release Carter from my hold. Terror courses through me as I watch them work on him. He’s so pale and unresponsive. One of the medics talks to Bo, who gives him all the information we told him.

  Derek and I move to the edge of the shore, giving them all the room they need. Bo joins us to ease our panic. I bury my face in Derek’s shoulder as Carter begins seizing again, this time more violent.

  Not good. Not good. Not good!

  “Trust me. They know what they’re doing. He’s in good hands now,” Bo shouts over the whir of helicopter blades booming through the air and the wind assaulting us as it lands. Derek’s arms wrap around me tightly as my hair whips around us.

  “They’re taking him, Teddy. He’s going to be OK,” Derek repeats his words over and over in my ear, like saying them will make it true. Carter is far from OK. We both know it.

  I chance a look as Carter is loaded into the waiting chopper, IVs running from his arms. He’s no longer moving. They’ve intubated him. The ugly breathing tube protrudes from his slack mouth, causing a loud sob to rip from my lips. Derek squeezes me tighter as I weep against him.

  “We’re sorry to have caused all of this,” Derek shouts, one arm still around me as he gestures with the other to the crowd of people, the flash of ambulance lights, and the commotion of the helicopter.

  Bo shakes his head. “No one can predict this sort of thing. Just please let me know how he’s doing.”

  I’m vaguely aware of Derek nodding. Everything seems so surreal. Fake. Like I’m walking in a cloud. This can’t be happening.

  One of the medics motions for us to join them.

  “We will,” Derek says.

  “He’s going to be OK,” Bo promises. “We got help in time. I know it.”

  “We won’t ever forget you,” Derek assures him, giving him a handshake with his free hand. Bo’s warm hand pats my back for a moment before Derek steers me to the ambulance.

  “We need some information. Who can provide it?” one of the medics inquires. He’s young. Maybe my age.

  Derek proceeds to give them what they need for transport. The other medic joins us and takes the notes his partner has jotted down. He rushes over to the helicopter and hands off the paper to the crew.

  I watch with teary eyes as the helicopter lifts off, taking everything I’ve ever longed for away from me.

  “Come on, we’ll drop you back to the launch site so you can get your vehicle,” one of the medics offers.

  35

  Teddy

  The impressions of my fingernails are in the palms of my hands. We’ve been sitting in the emergency room for hours, waiting to hear anything on Carter. Whenever I go to the desk to ask, I’m told the doctor will be out shortly.

  “What’s taking so long?” Derek growls, rubbing his hands over his tired face.

  “I don’t know,” I murmur, my legs bouncing as I chew on a fingernail. I keep replaying the day in my head. His smile. His kiss. His face paling. His shaking. The blood from his mouth as he involuntarily bit his tongue and lip.

  My eyes focus on the large red spot on my shorts. His blood. It’s stained my clothing. It’s still smeared on my thighs.

  “Go clean up, Teddy,” Derek’s gentle voice pulls me out of my near fit of tears. “Wash yourself. I’ll wait here for the doctor and will come get you if they come out.”

  I nod. He’s right. I get to my feet on autopilot and make my way to the bathroom where I stare at myself in the mirror. My green eyes are dull, and my face is pale. There are dirty streaks on my cheeks from my tears. My hair has long since fallen out of its ponytail. I’m not even sure where I lost my rubber band. Or how.

  Quickly, I wash my face and hands. Then I wipe the blood off my legs before running my fingers through my hair, fixing it the best I can. I still look like hell. I don’t care. I need to get back to the waiting room.

  I’m opening the bathroom door when I nearly collide with Derek.

  “Teddy,” his voice is choked. My heart plummets at the look on his face.

  Please, God, no!

  “Derek?” I whimper, reaching for him. He takes my hand in his.

  “He’s alive. He’s alive. I’m sorry. The doctor said he’s been intubated because he’s having trouble breathing. He’s had more seizures. They’re going to keep him sedated.”

  I sag against Derek, sobbing.

  “It’s OK, Teddy. He’s going to be OK.”

  “I’m scared, Derek.” I weep into his shoulder.

  “Me too. Me too.”

  After promising Derek I’m fine on my own, he leaves me to go check on Molly, who’s waiting in the RV in the parking lot.

  A bit later, I’m staring off into space, trying to be patient.

  “Mrs. George?” Doctor Barlett, Carter’s assigned doctor, asks, shaking my hand. My heart lurches in my chest at being referred to as Carter’s wife.

  “N-no, I’m his girlfriend. Teddy. Call me Teddy.”

  “I’m sorry. Teddy, we have Carter sedated. We’ve been in touch with his primary care provider.” Doctor Barlett drones on as he leads me to Carter’s room. I’m barely listening. All I want is to get to him.

  “It would appear that Carter had som
e very specific requests.”

  “What?” I mumble as we stop outside Carter’s hospital room. I can hear the beeping and clicking of the monitors inside. Even the sound of the machine helping him breathe is loud enough for me to hear.

  “Carter’s doctor. . . a Doctor Abrams—” Doctor Barlett looks at the chart in his hands. “—has informed us that Carter is a candidate for a special procedure. It appears all the paperwork is in order.”

  “What paperwork?” I frown. Carter never told me any of this, so everything Doctor Barlett says is completely new to me.

  “The paperwork Carter signed prior to his current situation. He’s made you his power of attorney. You’re in charge of his medical decisions. Doctor Abrams says that Carter agreed to the procedure, his signature is on file and everything is in order. The choice is yours, Teddy.”

  “I-what?” I squeak, looking from Carter’s room to Dr. Bartlett.

  “There’s an experimental surgery to remove his brain tumors. Doctor Abrams says he’s flying in to speak with you in person. For now, we have Carter sedated. We’re going to let him rest tonight. If all goes well, we’ll remove his breathing tube in the morning and see how he fares.”

  “H-how do you think he’ll fare?”

  “It’s hard to say. He seized multiple times. He hasn’t had one in a few hours, but that’s probably due to the medication we have him on right now. We’re going to lower it and observe. I’m hopeful we can get him well enough to pursue the surgery he needs.”

  I nod, my throat tight.

  “How will he have the procedure if he’s here?”

  “He’ll have to be flown to the medical center where it’s being done. Doctor Abrams says he has all that information for you. For now, I suggest maybe try talking to Carter. Reassure him. If you need anything, just hit the red call button.”

  “Thank you,” I say softly.

  I’m overwhelmed. Carter trusts me enough to put me in charge of his life. I swallow hard and pull in a deep breath. He needs me. And I need him.